chapter 59

Four months later

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Ayesha's pov

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A sizzling sound came when I poured water in a hot pan, then I added tea leaves and let it boil, while I crushed ginger in a mortar and pestle. I opened the fridge and took out milk and a carton of orange juice for myself, I put both on the counter

A smile appeared on my lips, when did I think that one day I would be doing something for Athar and enjoying it.

Life has been so blissful for the last few months, every passing day with him makes me realise how blind I have been, Allah has blessed me with the best and I was so stupid to not acknowledge it.

Athar made me discover so many things about myself which I was never aware of, I didn't know I was capable of loving someone so unconditionally. I have never been happier.

My phone pinged, I picked it up, it was a message from Emma, she was sharing a picture of her engagement, I was staring in awe at her beautiful gown, she looked so pretty.

I did not understand this girl, when she came here, she was so rude to me, but suddenly she changed, she was so friendly with me that I couldn't believe it.

The way she started behaving with me made me wonder if she is my friend or Athar's.

I used to hate her in the beginning, but now I'm thankful to her for coming here, her closeness with Athar made me realise that I can't bear to lose him.

I quickly replied to her message.

I startled when two arms snaked around my waist

"Hey my love" Athar whispered in my ear and left a kiss on my earlobe, I shuddered

"What are you doing here? I told you to rest" I said freeing myself and turning around

"I was missing you" he put his hands on my waist and pulled me to him, I gasped

"Very funny!" I scoffed, "you have a headache, I told you to rest, tea is almost ready, I was just going to bring it. Why do you never listen to me? Why don't you ever take care of yourself?" I complained

"Why will I take care of myself when you are there for that?" He winked at me

"Then you listen to me, go to the room and wait for me, I am bringing tea, you will feel better after having it" I said slightly pushing him, but his grip tightened and he pulled me so close to him

"I know what will make me feel better, let me have it" he said in a deep husky voice. He cupped my cheeks, and started leaning in, I put my finger on his lips

"What is wrong with you? You start anywhere! Look around, we are in the kitchen" I said making him realise our surroundings.

"So what? You are my wife, I'm not doing anything wrong" he was about to close the gap between our lips, but suddenly a voice came

"Who's there in the kitchen?" Dadi said, my eyes widened, I panicked

"Dadi is here, hide" I told him and looked around to find a place where he can hide

"Ayesha it's o..." He was saying but I cut him off

"Behind the counter, right now" I ordered him

"Ayesh...."

"Hide" I dragged him to the counter and pushed him down ignoring his protest, I returned to the counter and got busy in making tea

"Ayesha! What are you doing in the kitchen so late?" Dadi asked, I turned around and looked at her

"D.. dadi ac.. actually Athar has a headache, so I'm making tea for him" I said and poured milk in the pot

"Why are you making it? You could have asked any maid to do it"

"You know that I like to do all of Athar's work on my own" I said with a smile, she beamed at me

"As you like, by the way, don't mind beta, but Athar won't like the tea you are making" she pointed at the pot, I turned to look at it, I gasped loudly when I saw that instead of milk I had put orange juice in the tea

"Oh no! What have I done?" I picked up the pot and kept it on the countertop, dadi laughed, then she spoke in a hushed tone

"Tea was anyways not going to work for Athar, you should give him what he thinks will make him feel better" dadi said with a smirk I looked at her in disbelief.

Did she hear Athar? I wondered, she chuckled and answered my unasked question.

"Don't worry I didn't hear anything, I don't even know that Athar is hiding behind the counter" she said in a teasing voice, I looked down feeling embarrassed. She held my face and kissed my forehead

"I am so happy for you both, may Allah keep you together always, may Allah give you lots of children" I blushed at her words, I smiled.

"Aise hi muskurati raho, Allah tumhe nazrebad se bachaye meri bachi (keep smiling like this, may Allah protect you from evil eye, my child)" she blessed me

"I'm so thankful that you forgave my Athar. He loves you so much and for you he can do anything, you are his life." she said, I knew what she was saying was absolutely true, still I got overwhelmed and hugged her

"Athar is lucky to have you" she said, I pulled back.

"Chalo mai jaa rahi hun warna tumhare dada ji mujhe dhoondte dhoondte yahin aa jayenge, dono dada pote ek se hi to hai (okay I'm going now. Otherwise your dada ji will come here looking for me, both the grandfather and the grandson are alike)" she giggled, I also laughed

"Shabba khair (good night)" I said

"Good night beta, you also go to sleep." she patted my cheek, I nodded. She turned around.

"We are leaving now, all the hidden cockroaches can come out as now the kitchen will be empty" she said aloud and left, there was a hint of teasing in her tone. I laughed. As expected Athar came running.

"Are you leaving me alone in the kitchen?" He asked, I shook my head, "but dadi said.. wait, did she call me a cockroach" he scrunched his nose, I burst into laughter

"There is nothing to laugh at" he said, I nodded

"Chalo tum room mei batata hun tumhe (let's go in the room, I will teach you a lesson)" he took a step towards me, before I could run away he held my hand and pulled me to him.

"You have a headache" I reminded him when he was crossing his limits

"Not anymore" he said and took me to our room.

He laid us on the bed, his eyes were keenly looking at me, I was getting nervous.

I was worried about his headache also, which he seemed to forget

"Athar your headac..." I tried speaking but he put his finger on my lips. He ignored everything and drenched me with the rain of his love.

******

"I'm coming in a minute" I said and hung up the call.

"You should go now Athar jeeju is getting impatient" Reem winked at me, then she gulped down her medicine, I smiled

"Athar jeeju? That means you are upset with jeeju" I said and kept her medical box at the side table.

"Izhaan ka to zikr bhi na karo mere saamne ayega to kacchaa chaba jaungi mai abhi use (don't even talk about Izhaan, I'm going to eat him alive the moment he comes in front of me)" she said angrily, I felt bad for my innocent jeeju

"Don't say that, jeeju is so sweet yaar" I took jeeju's side

"Izhaan? And sweet? Ayesha, I am going to kil ..." She was going to kill me for speaking in favour of jeeju, but thankfully my husband saved my life

"Athar is calling" I shouted, I got up and ran from there.

Reem has become so dangerous in her pregnancy, I pity jeeju.

"Hello" I answered the call.

"Let me remind you that the party is tonight, and your poor husband has been waiting in the car for you, for the past twenty minutes" he sounded annoyed

"Oh really? I totally forgot" I said while descending the stairs

"I'm not in the mood to joke" he said, I sighed

"Ohho why are you getting so angry? I'm coming to you. I went to give medicine to Reem"

"It took you twenty minutes to give her medicine, I'm sure she must be cursing Izhaan and you were sitting there feeling bad for him" he said and I stifled a smile.

"There was nothing like that" I exited the house and walked towards his car

"Ayesha! I'm very upset with you, you made me wait for you for so long" he said, I hung up the call, opened the door and sat on the passenger seat. He turned to look at me

He was just sitting with his phone still pressed on his ear, his mouth was slightly open and he was staring at me. I snapped my fingers in front of him

"Oh hello!" I said, he came out of his trance. "Are you really upset with me?" I asked batting my eyelashes at him, he smiled and shook his head

"How can I? When you look like this!" He said checking me out, he held my hand and kissed it, "you are very very beautiful, how did I get so lucky!" His voice was filled with love, I smiled

"Aren't we getting late now?" I asked

"Let's not go to the party, let's go back to our room" he smirked at me, he was leaning in towards me, but I put my hands on his chest and pushed him lightly

"Atharr!" I warned him, his eyes twinkled

"Say my name again" he requested, I blushed and looked down.

"Shall we go now?" I asked

"As you say my love" he said and started driving.

I stared at the handsome guy sitting next to me, it's been months since we have sorted out differences between us, it's been months since I have started calling him by his name, but still every time I call him by his name he gets excited.

We reached the venue, he left his car for valet parking and hand in hand we entered the hall.

The moment we entered, the meeting and greeting started, since I have been regular in the office, I knew many people here. We went to Mr & Mrs Oswal, the hosts of the party.

"Welcome Mr & Mrs Khan, such a pleasure to have you" Mr oswal shook hands with the both of us

"Thank you for inviting us" Athar said formally.

After a small conversation we moved to meet others. Waiters were moving around with starters, I was full by eating that only.

My mouth started to hurt after smiling at so many people and my throat felt dry.

"You ok?" Athar asked

"I'm thirsty" I said, he looked around for any waiter, but they were mostly serving cocktails

"I'll go and get water for you" he said and left. My eyes were following him. He went to the drink section and got water, he was returning to me, suddenly some girl came and stopped him, I was not familiar with that girl.

My eyes widened when she hugged Athar, it did not look like a formal hug, she was glued to him for too long, finally she pulled back, my heart burnt to ashes when I saw a huge smile on Athar's face.

I marched and went to them. I put my hand on Athar's chest and leaned on him, he looked at me.

"Hey honey" I said flirtatiously, then took the glass from him and emptied it in one go

"Ayesha! Meet her, this is Sussanne, and this is my wife, Ayesha" he introduced me to the girl I was ignoring.

"Hi!" She said with a fake smile, I wanted to kill her for touching my husband

"Oh! Hi! Sorry I didn't see you there" I said, her smile vanished

"I'll see you around Athar" she said and left.

"Bitch" I mumbled

"What's wrong with you? Why did you behave so badly with her?" He asked

"Apko bohot bura lag raha hai (you are feeling very bad)" I snapped at him

"You don't know her, she belongs to a very presti...."

"I don't care what she belongs to, you hugged her" I raised an accusatory finger at him

"I didn't hug her, she did" he defended quickly

"You could have stopped her, but you didn't" I narrowed my eyes at him, he chuckled

"Are you jealous?"

"Athar" I warned him to stop

"You look so hot when you are jealous" he continued laughing, I just continued glaring at him

"If you react this way, I would make you jealous all the time" he said and I lost it.

"You think making jealous is fun, right?" I said, he must have seen something in my eyes because his smile quickly disappeared.

"What I mean was . . "

"Wait!" I said to him and turned around, I scanned the whole area and found a guy standing in a corner, he was doing something on his phone

"Ayesha, no" Athar shouted from behind me, but I ignored him and went to the guy.

"Hi" I said with a huge smile

"Hey" he grinned

"May I have a dance with you?" I asked

"Of course pretty lady, I would be delighted" he extended his hand in front of me.

Don't do it

Don't do it

Don't do it

My heart was shouting, but I listened to my mind which was dying to take revenge from Athar, and I kept my hand on his.

We walked to the dance floor.

I came here in anger, but now I was feeling so awkward. He put his hand on my waist and pulled me a little closer to him, he was leading the dance while I was thinking, in what mess I got myself, Athar would be so furious, I didn't even have the courage to look back at him.

I tried pulling my hand out of his grip, but he didn't let go.

"Thanks for the dance, I should go now" I said

"So soon? We are just getting started" he pulled me closer to him and I was cursing myself for doing this. He leaned down to whisper something in my ear, I pulled back immediately, but he wouldn't let me go.

"You are so beautiful" he said, suddenly I was pulled away forcefully from him, I didn't have to look who pulled me, I could tell even without looking.

"What's your problem man?" The guy shouted, Athar held his collar

"Apni zindagi pyari hai to dafa hoja yahan se (if you love your life, get lost from here)" he said grinding his jaw

Tu to gayi Ayesha! (You are so dead Ayesha).

The guy immediately left and he turned to me. I tried giving him a smile. He held my hand and dragged me out of the party, I quietly followed him. I knew I was at fault.

He left my hand once we were in the valet, he ordered to bring his car, I was standing there like a scared mouse. Why did I have to awaken the sleeping tiger?

He didn't say a word, I was just looking at him, his fists were clenched, and his jaw was tight.

Soon the car came, and the parking guy opened the door for me.

"Good night ma'am" he said as I settled at the passenger seat, usually I would pass a smile at such situations, but right now I was so scared of Athar, that I kept my face blank and quickly closed the door.

He sat on the driver's seat and began driving. He kept the speed so high that my fear worsened

"Athar please lower the speed" I said, but he increased the speed even more.

"What are you doing? Slow down" I said, but he increased it further, there was a car coming, I was sure we were going to crash

"Athar watch out" I shouted, he took a sharp turn and we escaped the crash, I released the breath I was holding.

"Are you trying to get us killed?" I shouted, the car started moving in zag zag at a crazy speed, my heart was drumming against my ribcage.

I knew he was not going to stop.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry" I began chanting. He hit the brake, the tires screeched, but thankfully the car stopped. He looked at me with his angry red eyes.

"What I did was so wrong! I am sorry for that" I said

"How dare you?" He said in an ice cold voice, a chill ran down my spine.

"I told you that I did not hug that girl, she did, but you still went and flirted with that bastard"

"I did not flirt with him, I was just tryi..."

"Shut up Ayesha!" He shouted, I jumped in my seat. "you should be thankful that I left that guy alive"

"Athar! I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have..."

"Yes! You shouldn't have let him touch you. How could you do this to me?"

"You were only saying you will make me jealous"

"I was only saying and you did it, you are well aware of how possessive I'm about you, still you did something like this. I am so disappointed with you" his words made me feel so ashamed of myself. I looked down.

He started the car and the rest of the journey went in silence. I knew he was angry at me but I had nothing to say in my defense.

We reached home, without saying a word he got out of the car and went inside. I was so ashamed of myself. I knew I put him down.

For a long time I remained seated in the car and he never bothered to return and check on me. Finally I got up and went into the house. I headed straight to my room.  Athar was not there.

I just kept standing there and waited for him. After around 5 minutes he came out of the washroom, I ran to him and hugged him, I broke into tears.

"I'm sorry Athar, please forgive me. I can't take it when you are angry with me. I promise I will never do anything like that again, please don't be upset with me" I cried.

He remained quiet

"Please Athar" I pleaded.

He sighed and wrapped his arms around me. I tightened the hug.

"I love you so much" I said, he let out a cold sigh

"Never test me like that again Ayesha" he said.

"I promise, I would never"

I didn't know if he forgave me or not, but at least he was now talking to me.

*******

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Reem's POV

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I looked at the clock, it was almost midnight and I had no idea where Mr Izhaan Khan was. I was burning in anger.

He has changed, he doesn't love me like he did. I stood in front of the mirror and looked at my reflection, how can he love me now? Look at how fat I have become, my tummy is so huge. I cried looking at myself.

I extended my hand towards the tissue box to take out a tissue paper to wipe my tears, but the box fell down. Bending down was so difficult with such a huge belly, still I tried to pick it up, but before I could reach it, it was picked up from the floor and was kept on the table. I looked up, Izhaan was there.

"Why are you crying jaan?" He asked looking worried, I turned around and went to sit on the bed, I was too tired to keep standing.

"Are you still upset with me?" He asked, but I turned my head to the other side.

"Reem!" He called me sweetly, my heart skipped a beat, but I did not look at him, "I'm sorry" he said.

Last night I was doing some online shopping. I found a beautiful baby cot which I wanted to buy, so I went to show it to him but he was too busy on his laptop to even look at it. That made me very upset with him.

Fresh tears appeared in my eyes, I didn't even know why I was crying.

"Jaan please! Don't hurt me like this" he said and kissed my eyes one by one.

"You are very bad Izhaan" I said, he smiled

"I'm well aware of that" he hugged me, and I cried keeping my head on his shoulder

"I said I'm sorry, now please stop crying" he said, I pulled back, I wiped my nose with his shirt.

"You know it was such a beautiful cot, I wanted to buy it" I cried and put my head on his shoulder

"You are right, I'm so bad that I couldn't even look at it. But don't worry, I will compensate for my mistake, tomorrow I will take you for our baby's shopping, we will spend the whole day together" he said, and my face lit up, I looked at him

"Do you mean it?" I asked, he nodded, I grinned ear to ear.

"Thank you so much Izhaan, you are really the best" I said kissing his cheek, he chuckled.

"You are the best" he caressed my cheek, with his thumb, an emotion crossed his eyes which I couldn't decipher

"Is anything wrong?" I asked, he kept looking at me, he closed his eyes so that I couldn't read them, he sighed heavily then opened his eyes, he quickly got up from the bed.

"Izhaan" I called him.

"Hmm" he hummed without looking at me.

"Is everything ok?" I repeated my question

"Did you eat anything?" He totally avoided my question.

"Yeah! I had dinner" I said.

"I am going to change my clothes, I'm exhausted" he said, I nodded, he went into the closet.

I laid down on the bed, why am I feeling so uneasy? What is this weird feeling in my heart? I will have to talk to Izhaan.

I was waiting for him to return, but didn't realise when I fell asleep.

*****

A loud noise broke my slumber, I looked around to find the source of disturbance. I found Izhaan sitting on the floor, he was picking up broken glass, there was a strong smell in the room

"Izhaan! What happened?" I asked, he looked up at me

"Sorry, I disturbed you, the perfume's bottle fell from my hand" he said

"Why are you cleaning it? Ask Amira, she will do it" .

"It's ok" he got up, I looked at him, he was completely ready to leave, while I had just woken up, I got off the bed.

"Why did you not wake me up earlier? It's almost noon. Give me some time I will quickly get ready, then we will leave" I was about to walk into the closet, but he held my hand to stop me

"I'm going out for an important work, we will go some other day" he said and my heart sank.

"You said we will spend the day together"

"I know what I said, but it is unavoidable"

"Why are you doing this to me? Why have you changed so much?" I asked getting angry

"Oh come on Reem! Just because I am not taking you for shopping you are getting so angry, there is still time for the baby to come, we will go shopping, but right now let me focus on my case" he held my hand, I pulled my hand out of his grip.

"I don't understand what has changed between us. You think I don't notice how you are always busy on your phone, your untimely meetings? How you are always lost? What's going on?" I asked in anger, he rolled his eyes

"You need to control your pregnancy hormones, sometimes it becomes too difficult to deal with your mood swings" he said and left the room, I stared in disbelief at the open door of my room.

I felt wetness on my cheeks, I wiped them roughly. What is wrong with me? Why can't I stop crying these days.

******

I was sitting in my room, reading a book about child care. As my pregnancy has progressed my mood has changed, I don't know what is happening to me. The energy I used to feel earlier is gone now, my heart keeps telling me that something is not correct.

The door opened and dadi entered, I quickly put the book aside.

"What are you doing beta?" She asked sitting next to me.

"I was just reading a book." I pointed at the book I was holding a few seconds ago. Dadi sighed and scooted closer to me

"Why are you always sitting in your room? We got you shifted on the ground floor so that you can easily move around, but you hardly come out of your room. What is the matter?" She asked, I shook my head, she kept looking at me for a while then she spoke

"Let's go"

"Where?" I asked

"To the lawn. Let's walk for a while, it's good for your health"

"Dadi! I'm not in the mood"

"Just stay quiet! I'm not going to hear anything from you" she scolded me, I sighed and got up

I came to the lawn and was walking with dadi, she was talking to me and I was listening to her absent mindedly

"Reem" she called, and I stopped to listen to her. "What are you thinking? Share with me" she held my hand and took me to the chair, she made me sit down and dropped next to me.

"Tell me beta" she asked, her concern made me cry

"I don't know what is happening to me! Why do I always feel like crying?" I cried

"It happens in pregnancy, sometimes you feel too happy, and the next moment you start crying. It's normal, there's something else bothering you. What is it?"

"I'm scared, I don't know if I will be able to handle the baby!"

"Why will you not be able to take care of the baby? You are worrying for no reason, we all are here to help you. Don't worry" she wiped my tears

"I miss mom" I said truthfully, she sighed heavily.

"I miss her too"

"Sometimes I feel if she was here she would have taken care of me"

"I can't bring her, but I promise you that I will support you at every step." She held my chin and spoke to me lovingly.

Her love made me open up to her and told her.

"Dadi I strongly feel something very bad is going to happen, something which will break me into pieces, something which will be unbearable for me. I get this feeling all the time" i felt goosebumps by just saying it, even dadi looked worried, but suddenly she smiled

"It is happening because you are always stuck in the room, you are just over thinking, you need to go out, change of place will make you feel better" before I could reply to dadi, maa came

"Reem! You are here, I have been looking for you" she said

"I brought her here for a walk" dadi replied

"You did a very good thing Amma" maa smiled, "have this" she passed me a glass of juice

"Maa! I don't want to have it" I shook my head

"Don't throw tantrums, it is good for you, drink it quickly" she said sternly, reluctantly I took the glass from her hand and took a small sip.

"I won't leave from here till you finish it" she said

"What are you making in dinner for Reem?" Dadi asked maa

Maa was replying to her, she was talking about some dish which has iron, potassium etc. I was just listening quietly to them.

Everyone loves me so much, then why my heart feels so empty, what is this feeling!

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