41

I stared at the coffee table as I loosened the hold on my legs. I could hear Caroline talking to Kai at the door.

"She doesn't want to see anyone. You're not an exception."

"Please, Caroline. She needs me."

"I'm sorry. She's just going through something."

"Can you just tell me why she's been ignoring me for a week?"

"She'll tell you when she's ready."

He sighed. "I just need to see her."

I could hear the battle she was fighting in her mind. I could feel her look at me. A few seconds later, she looked away from me.

"You know I can help her. You just have to let me in."

"She doesn't want to see anyone, including you. We just have to let her be sad for a while."

"She's not just sad. She's grieving something. I need to know what it is. I need to help her."

"She doesn't want help."

They went back and forth for a few more minutes. I pulled the blanket over my head, forcing their voices out of my mind. I heard the door shut, then footsteps. Caroline walked back into the kitchen, where she was making dinner with Ryan and Sam.

I stared at my phone on the table as it started ringing. The number that Joshua called from last time was displayed on the screen. I sat up and grabbed my phone. I answered the call.

"What do you want from me?"

"I already got what I want, Evelyn. However, I need a favor from you."

"Why would I help you?"

"Alaric and Josette are very fond of each other, don't you think? Though, shopping for baby supplies this early is a bit presumptuous, don't you think?"

"That's your daughter."

"She let me die along with the rest of the coven. As far as I'm concerned, she's already dead."

I swallowed the fear in my throat. "Stay away from them."

"Oh, I will. As long as you do as I say."

I closed my eyes. "What?"

"Destroy Kai and the life he's built."

I felt tears prick my eyes when I opened them. "What?"

"Lucky for you, you don't have to do much. As far as I can tell, you're already destroying him. All you need to do is get out of his life completely."

"No. I... I can't."

"Yes, Evelyn. And you will. You know how I know?"

"How?" I exhaled sharply as I wiped the tears off my cheeks.

"Because you know how much Josette and those babies she and your sister are carrying matter to Alaric and the rest of your godforsaken friend group."

I shut my eyes as I took a deep breath. "Why are you doing this?"

"You'll know soon enough." I could hear shuffling in the background. "And don't forget about that linking spell between you and that boy. Sever every connection with him." He ended the call.

Everything was crumbling, and I couldn't do anything to stop it. Joshua's smart enough to cloak himself from everyone, so he's untraceable. He knows I won't say a word because it will endanger everyone. And he's watching everything, which worsens this situation.

I can't live without Kai in my life, I've learned that. He's been absent from my life, but he's never been completely gone. Severing all ties I have with him is the equivalent of cutting myself into millions of pieces. If I refuse to do it, though, Jo and her babies will die.

I waited for the minute I would wake up from the nightmare I put myself in, but I never did.

...

"Hey, Ev," she chirped. I didn't move. "I have to go to Stefan's for a while. Jo and Ric have to tell me something."

I didn't respond. About a minute later, she pulled the blanket off my head. She was sitting on the floor and staring at me.

"Whatever you're going through is obviously hurting you to the point where you won't eat and you're always sleeping. I want to help you, Evelyn, but I need you to tell me what's wrong. You don't have to, though. I just want you to know I'm here for you to talk to. Kai will listen to you. He's begging to see you every day. Just to see you." She pushed my hair back behind my ear. "Nobody wants to see you hurt. We all want to help you. Everyone wants you to be happy." She kept her hand at the side of my face.

I didn't respond to her. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't. I don't have enough energy to cry.

"I hate seeing you like this." Her eyes were glossy. "Can you -" She inhaled a deep breath. "Can you do just one thing for me? Please," she begged. After a few seconds, she continued. "Can you come with me? Just once. You don't have to do anything else."

After I didn't answer, she pulled away. She stood up and took a few steps away. She turned away and started texting someone.

I forced myself to sit up, pushing the blanket away. My hair covered the sides of my face. It was still damp from my shower. I stood up and walked to the door. I pulled on my shoes. Caroline was standing in front of me now. She was smiling at me.

I turned away from her, walking out of the house and going to her car. She followed me.

I spent the drive thinking about the call with Joshua two weeks ago. How could I have let it get this far? I haven't broken up with Kai or even spoke to him since I left his apartment. It feels just as painful as having to live without him.

Then I thought about the texts he kept sending me. Each one invoked more fear than the last and made me spiral further into depression. They come four days apart from one another.

Clock's ticking. The longer you wait, the worse it'll be for you.

I can feel how it hurts, and I appreciate the pain.

I can't wait until we're together again. I can already feel you.

I followed her to the door, staring at the ground as I walked. I followed her inside, shutting the door behind me. I looked up from the ground to see Kai, Valerie, Stefan, Damon, Elena, Bonnie, Liv, Jo, and Alaric. There was a look of relief on Kai's face. I felt frozen. I worried about what would happen if I got too close to him.

I walked to the edge of the living room, crossing my arms and leaning against the doorframe. Caroline walked over and sat next to Stefan.

Kai was standing behind the couch they were on. Elena, Bonnie, and Liv were beside him. Damon, Ric, and Jo were on the other couch. I looked at Jo and Ric. They had a sad, almost scared look on their faces. They were sitting close to each other as usual. They seemed distant.

Without a word from their mouths, I already knew what happened. He got to them.

"What's going on," Caroline asked.

Ric stared at the ground. Jo's eyes moved to the coffee table, "About a week ago," She looked at Caroline, "I saw... Joshua. And then I saw him more frequently. I thought I was just seeing things. Then, I- I passed out. We went to the hospital and they... They checked the babies, and they told me-" Her voice broke. "They said there was never anything there."

"What does that have to do with Joshua," Liv wondered.

"We think he had something to do with it," Ric answered.

"But they were never there," Elena questioned.

"They were there," I assured them. I pulled away from the wall. They all looked at me. "And you weren't seeing things. Joshua's alive. And I'm really, really sorry because I could've stopped him. And I'm not just saying that to say it, I'm saying it because it's true."

"Stopped him from what," Damon asked.

"How do you know all this," Kai asked.

I thought about what he said. I looked at Kai. "You have to undo the linking spell between us."

He shook his head once, "What are you talking about?"

"What happened, Evelyn," Jo asked. I looked at her. "Did he..."

I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket. I pulled it out and opened the text from Joshua.

I'm upping the stakes. Your sister will go tonight, too, if you don't get it over with. Ruin your life or end four others.

"What is it," Stefan asked.

When I didn't answer, Kai spoke again. "What the hell is going on with you?"

I turned my phone off. "Joshua never died." I looked at them. "It was a spell. Lillian's not dead either. Ryan dying was pointless. All of it was for nothing because all of them are back. If I don't give Joshua what he wants, he will kill Jo, Caroline, and the other babies."

"What does Joshua want," Damon asked.

I looked at him, then Kai. "You need to undo the spell."

After a few seconds, Damon asked, "That's all."

Kai stared at me for a few seconds before answering for me. "If it was, she would've already asked." He looked at Damon. "He wants me out of her life so he can get to her."

My phone went off again. I sighed as I looked at it. I hesitated to open the message, considering it was a picture. My stomach dropped when I finally opened it. The picture was of a bloody heart he was holding. The person he ripped it from was sitting behind his focused hand. I couldn't see who it was. I felt sick to my stomach. A few seconds later, a text came through.

Now Ryan will really have his boyfriend's heart.

I felt tears flood my eyes as I inhaled sharply.

"Is he texting you," Elena asked

I turned my phone off and turned to walk out of the house. I pulled the door shut behind me.

"Evelyn, stop," Kai pleaded. He rushed in front of me and put his hands on my arms.

I put my hands on his chest and tried to pull away from him. "I have to go."

"No." He moved his hands to my face, forcing me to look at him. "Stop for just one minute, okay? Just listen to me."

I stilled my movements as I stared at him. I breathed out shakily, trying to lift the weight off my chest. "He killed Ryan's boyfriend. He ripped his heart out."

"Baby..." He wiped his thumb across my cheek, clearing away the tears. "That's not your fault. None of this is your fault." He stepped closer. "We can fix this."

The sadness was stuck in my throat. "I can't lose you."

He shook his head, forcing a smile on his lips. "You're not losing me. I'll always be with you."

I shook my head. "You're leaving. You're not supposed to leave me."

He slid his hands to my neck, resting his thumbs under my jaw. "This is our only choice, Ev. This isn't for us. This is for Caroline and Jo. And the babies. Think of the babies. You love babies."

I gripped his shirt. "You're not allowed to go."

He sighed shakily. "It's just until we can kill him. For good."

I furrowed my brows. "No."

He tilted his head, "Just for a while. It's not forever. Okay?"

I moved my hands to his wrists. "Where are you going?"

He shook his head once. "You'll try to bring me back. That can't happen. He wants me gone, and he won't stop until it happens."

"You're letting him get to me?"

"No." He tilted my head up. "I will never let that happen. He will never get to you. I'm not going to let him hurt you."

More tears fell from my eyes. "But you're leaving me. You're supposed to stay and love me."

"I love you from everywhere. I've loved you from an entirely different world." He nodded. "The distance between us this time is nothing compared to the last."

I inhaled sharply. The reality of our situation was setting in. He's leaving to protect me. I don't want him to, and if I tell him that, it won't matter. He's made up his mind. "I need you."

His eyes were glossy. He looked at the ground for a few seconds. He looked at my face again. "You will always have me." He stepped closer. I slid my hands to his sides as our bodies connected.

"I love you, Evelyn."

I quickly breathed out. "I love you, Kai."

He leaned down, pressing his lips to mine. He kissed me slowly, livening every part of me. My mind melted as my heart beat faster. I could feel him tearing the linking spell away from me. The death of us filled my mouth with the taste of blood. Everything between us was fading away.

I felt him pull away from the kiss. I was afraid to open my eyes. The touch of him was burned into my skin even in his absence. His absence. It surrounded me like a blanket, suffocating me. How was it that easy for him to leave?

I opened my eyes. The night was coating everything around me. The stars felt dimmer as the sinking feeling of missing him weighed me down.

I could feel eyes on me. I didn't have to find those eyes to match them to Joshua.

I pulled myself out of my sadness and wiped my cheeks. I turned and walked back into the boarding house. I pushed the door shut. I felt their eyes on me as I walked further into the house.

"Evelyn," Elena said softly.

I looked up at her. There was a sincere look on her face. "He's gone." Admitting it felt like a punishment.

"Where," Damon asked.

I shook my head, "He wouldn't tell me."

Caroline got up and walked over to me. She wrapped her arms around me. "Everything will be okay," she whispered. "You'll get him back."

I pulled back from her. "We actually need to go. Um... Joshua killed Sam, and Ryan needs me."

She nodded. "Okay."