PARKER - 100k reads special update

SPECIAL CHAPTER IN HONOR OF 100K READS

{texting thread - late night - Lexa POV}

Parker: Lex, you up?

Lexa: What do you want, Parker?

Parker is typing. . .

Parker: I miss you

Parker: can we talk?

Lexa: ..I guess

Parker: thank you

Parker: I really appreciate it you know

Lexa: I really appreciated you, you know

Parker: just stop already

Parker: you don't need to torture me when ive already tortured myself enough

Lexa: Park, you literally lied to me

Parker: I'm sorry

Lexa: why did you do it?

Parker: I was jealous, I guess

Lexa: of what?

Parker: every girl I get meets him, and then she leaves. I didn't want you to follow the pattern and that's why I made it up. I told you that shit on the docks about you kissing me instead of him, the night you went to a club with my sister, and I regret it.

Parker: maybe if I would've just told the truth I could've had a chance with you

Lexa: you did have a chance. think back to three weeks ago when you started ignoring me.

Parker: oh yeah, that shocked me a lot. Instead of going for Mason you went for Jared! you're the first to choose that route.

Lexa: I liked you, Park

Lexa: he was head over heels for Elle, and he's my best friend. I couldn't let him sit there and get humiliated. I don't see him that way.

Parker: think you should've maybe told me about that?

Lexa: think you should've given me a chance to tell you?

Parker is typing. . .

Parker has disconnected.

I rub my temples with my fingers, massaging the smooth skin near my scalp.

That boy.

He gives me a headache. I guess all guy's do in some way, the only difference being where the ache happens to occur. It could be a headache, or a heartache, or a complete different ache altogether.

I shut off my lamp and curl up deeper in my bed, waiting for sleep to overcome me.

Hours later, I roll over, restless, my mind still wondering, my thoughts still nomadic.

Thoughts of him soar across my mind, and I'm unable to restrain them. A tear slides down my cheek, involuntarily. What has become of me? I think to myself.

{4:19 am - texting thread - Parker POV}

Lexa is typing. . .

Lexa: Park

Lexa: can we please talk

Parker: i'm right here babe

Lexa: don't say that please

Lexa: It feels funny

Parker: first, that's what she said

Parker: second, you'll always be that to me

Parker: even if you decide to never speak to me again

Lexa: oh god, I miss you

Lexa: where are you?

Parker: the empty apartment across from you

Lexa: I need you

Parker: I don't know if that's the best idea

Parker: he deserves it, but being cheated on sucks

Lexa has disconnected.

I look up, suddenly aware of a tiny thumping noise at the apartment door. Of course she doesn't think to use the bell, probably doesn't want to wake up anyone else.

That's the thing about her. She's just amazing. In every single fucking way and it drives me crazy. The things she does, are all for a reason, and everyone she meets seems to be impacted by her. She's just beautiful. Inside for sure, and don't even get me started on the outside.

She fantasizes me, the way her hair falls straight down her back, curling ever so slightly at the ends, the way her brown eyes look up, as if they're staring into my soul, when she looks at me.

God, the things I want to do with her, the person I want to be for her.

I knew from when I saw her moving in, and from when she started hanging out with my twin sister, that she would attract him.

She was just his type.

Light brown colored hair, brown eyes, average height, had a thing with me.

Exactly his type.

And of course, she chose him.

But I guess that's partly my fault.

You see, I try to be a good guy. I don't use girls. I don't do any of that petty shit that guy's my age find to be the norm.

I'm far from perfect, yes, but I'd like to think I could at least get a decent girlfriend, and by decent, I mean one that won't leave me for one of my best friends.

Mason.

How I despise the kid. He tries to act all badass, but he's not.

Instead he uses some manipulative charm I can't seem to acquire, and girls are apparently just drawn to it.

I hate having one of my closest friends be that person.

I hate that, to girls, I'm gawky and he's gorgeous. But most of all, I hate her knocking. That tiny knock at the door just reminds me over and over of her tiny self, compared to my height, and how I just want to do everything with her, but I can't.

She is not mine, and she does not want me.

I get up from the couch and glance around the apartment. It looks good, especially considering I moved in only three weeks ago.

I pull out my phone and glance over her texts.

Lexa: don't say that please

Lexa: it feels funny

Yikes. But then again:

Lexa: I need you.

I rub my temples in frustration. What does she mean?

I'd rather be friendzoned than this awkward in between everything stage. Except with us, it's the post having a thing and now getting close again.

I don't know our boundaries, where we stand, and that confuses the shit out of me.

I need her. Lexa. The amazing girl living across from me. I don't want to say the wrong thing and overstep these stupid lines girls seem to take to the heart.

It's like walking on eggshells in cleats. Except half of the eggs are hard boiled. You'll crush some of the shells, maybe the boiled ones, where they break open and turn out good. But you also may step on a unboiled egg. Crack that shell and you can't turn around and fix it. The yellow, runny, yolk of pain and despair will run down and they're be nothing you can do. And worse, you'll see it running down the sides of your shoe and realize it was all your fault.

I can't do that. I can't lose her, not again.

The rapping on the door intensifies and I cross the small room and slowly place my hand on the handle. With a shaking breath, I turn, after unlatching the lock.

The door opens, and suddenly I'm shoved backwards with an intense force crushing my sides.

I breathe in, and look up, my chest rising and falling quickly from surprise, with her soft skin pressed tightly against mine, our hearts beating in rapidly and in sync.

And then she cries.

With her arms wrapped tightly around me, and her head against my chest, dark tears of self depressant come raining down onto my shirt.

I bring a hand up and cup the back of her head, securing her.

I run my fingers through her hair, letting the limp strands fall behind her shoulders as she cries.

"Lexa, baby what's wrong?"

"I miss you." She bites her lip, her eyes still welling with tears.

"I missed you too." I help her over to the couch gently, "I'm so sorry."

"No, I'm sorry."

"Alexis. You didn't do anything wrong. I was the one being a complete asshole to you, and I regret it. I wish I would've known about Jared, but it's my fault I reacted the way I did, not yours."

"You're not an ass."

"That's good to hear." I chuckle.

"Have-have you really been staying here the whole time?" She forces out.

I run my fingers down her cheek and carcass her jawline and neck, "Yes. I told you I'd never ever leave you."

"But you did." She fires back.

I gulp. Wasn't expecting that. I thought I was being smooth. And girls like smooth.

I think.

Damn it Parker, don't fuck things up even worse.

-

{6 hours earlier - texting thread - Mason and Elle}

Mason: has Lex been answering any of your messages?

Elle: no, not lately why?

Mason: she hasn't answered

Mason: it's really unlike her

Elle: she's probably just busy

Mason: I don't think so

Mason: if she's busy, what could she be doing without us? We're her best friends.

Elle: idk, did you ask Jared?

Mason: no

Elle: he might know

Elle: look, Mase. Just don't stress out about it. It's probably nothing.

Mason: thanks E. il go talk to him now

Mason has disconnected.

{5 hours earlier - texting thread - Mason and Jared}

Mason: hey

Jared: sup

Mason: idk, not much I guess. what are you doing?

Jared: I was about to watch a movie. If you know what I mean..

Mason: I take it, you're not getting over Elle very easily?

Jared: I think of her every time.

Mason: forget her bro

Mason: if she can't open her eyes and see how much you like her

Jared: I'm probably just better off not with her anyways. She's too good for me.

Mason: she's hot, you're hot, sounds like a match to me. Only difference is she's got a killer body and you don't.

Jared: thank you?

Mason: don't get your hopes up J, I'm straight

Jared: wow, I've been friendzoned. Fucking rude.

Mason: you didn't have a chance in the first place

Jared: true. I could never compete with Lexaaaaaa

Mason: shut the fuck up

Jared: you're lucky you know. Lexa obviously likes you

Mason: says her best guy friend. If this were a cheesy dumbass romance novel she'd end up with you and you know it

Jared: well of course, why do you think I'm friends with her? Aside from her ass of course

Mason: don't say shit like that

Mason: id knock your face in if you ever even thought about touching her

Jared: nope, those thoughts are reserved for Elle

Mason: good.

Jared: I was just kidding, you know. Lex is an amazing girl and she's hot as fuck, but I would never date her. She's like my sister dude.

Mason: keep it that way.

Jared: who took a piss in your Cheerios?

Mason: no one

Jared: just that time of the month again?

Mason: yes Jared. Because I obviously have a vagina to fucking bleed out of

Jared: when you assume you make an ass out of you and me

Jared: I learned that one from Lex.

Mason: I know. She told me first.

Jared: course she did, overprotective much?

Mason: I don't want to lose her

Jared: did you ever think that just because she's your girlfriend doesn't mean you get to own her?

Mason: I'm not owning her. Il leave that shit plan to Parker

Jared: defensive, Mason

Mason: I'm not defensive

Jared: denial

Mason: and she's not exactly my girlfriend

Jared: you mean you two are fucking without a label? wow, I didn't think Lexa was into that kinda stuff

Mason: we're not fucking

Jared: you've been talking for nearly four months

Mason: yeah, so?

Jared: and you haven't done anything yet?

Mason: we've kissed. Made out.

Jared: that's it?

Mason: she's not ready.

Jared: that never stopped you before, how come now?

Mason: she's just. Different. I don't know.

Jared: you're treating her right

Mason: I don't deserve her

Jared: yes you do

Mason: she doesn't know my past, and how many girls I've been with, and used, and thrown away. She doesn't know any of that. She surrounds herself with positivity and I bet even if I told her, she'd understand it.

Jared: she's Lexa. She'll get it.

Mason: exactly

Mason: I don't want her to 'get it.' She needs to know that I'm not good enough for her, and I definitely don't deserve her. She deserves so much more

Mason: especially so much more than me.

Mason has disconnected.

{Parker POV}

"Why did you pick today, to talk to me?" I question, "You've been ignoring me for so long, and you pick today, to respond." It's not like I didn't deserve the isolation, but still, parts of my mind are curious as to why today.

"I told you. I missed you."

"You shouldn't miss me. You're with.." I grit my teeth, "Mason."

"I'm not with him." She says quietly, "I don't know what we are. I like him a lot, but I also like you. And I'm so confused." She looks like she could start crying all over again.

Maybe she's PMSing. Yeah, that's it. Would explain the sudden attraction to me.

Of course, I knew better than to ask her that.

"You might not have a label, but you're still with him. Am I right?" I tilt her chin up, so she can look at me.

She brushes away my hands, as well as my question, "I don't know."

"Then tell me this, do you kiss him?"

She reaches up and kisses my cheek, "I just kissed you. And we're not together." She smirks cockily.

"I mean, do you really kiss him?"

"I don't even know what really kissing is." She chuckles, looking down to pick at her fingernails.

Be brave, Parker. One voice in my head tells me.

Don't fuck everything up, Parker. The other argues.

Should I?

I breathe in, deeply, and count to ten in my head, before looking down at her.

"If you don't know, then you haven't experienced."

"Maybe. I'm not sure." She pulls her bottom lip between her teeth."

Fuck. Definite boner coming on.

I glance down. Yep.

Awkwardly, I try to be nonchalant about reaching down and positioning a pillow to cover up a certain spot, but she notices.

Of course she notices.

"What are you doing?" She asks, doe eyed, as usual.

"Uh, um, well-" I stumble over my words. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

She reaches between us and grabs the pillow, "Oh." Her lips form into a perfect o as she notices, "Well this just got interesting."

"I'm so sorry. I know you're with him. I can't control it, fuck this is embarrassin-"

She smirks, glancing down at the now tent in my pants, "So, you're turned on by me." She bites her lip again, clearly testing my patience."

How she goes from emotional to crying to exhausted to sultry confuses the shit out of me, but hey, who's complaining?

"Why wouldn't I?" I force out.

"I could think of many, many reasons to answer that question." She chuckles.

"Well, you shouldn't be able too. You're beautiful."

"That's original."

"It's better than other things that are coming to mind right now. You're lucky I'm a gentlemen enough to have a filter."

"Maybe I'm not looking for a gentlemen."

I chuckle, "You don't want to hear this."

"Tell me."

"I'm thinking.." I trace circles on her wrist, "That I'm so confused on how I have the hottest girl in New Jersey in my room."

"That didn't seem too bad." She reflects.

"I'm not done yet." I say, trying to contain a blush.

Just keep focusing on the circles, I tell myself, continuing the pattern.

And don't fuck up, the voice adds.

"I'm thinking," I start again, "That if you were mine, I would have no doubt in my mind on messing around with you, right here and right now."

"How would you do that?" She questions.

"I would make sure you're comfortable. And then I would ever so gently lay your head back onto the pillow. I would press myself over you, keeping my weight on my forearms, and I would slowly move myself over you. Then I would take your lips in mine, and pleasure you until all you can do is moan my own name into my mouth."

She stares into my eyes, "What's the holdup?"

{the next morning - Elle POV}

Mason: any replies to you yet?

I sigh, and tap out a message.

Elle: not yet. Il go to her apartment and tell her to get her act together for you. desperate.

Mason: thanks E.

I roll over and fall back asleep. Mason could wait.

It's almost pathetic how much he obsesses over her.

I wish my guy could publicly do that.

Come to school with me, take me out on dates, drive me around..

The list of things Adrien can't do is practically endless. Adrien. I wonder where he is today.

I wonder where he spent the night.

He makes me crazy, worrying about him, but like he says, he always turns out okay.

I bite my lip. I know Lexa and the others have been wondering why I'm on such a down low about him. But how am I supposed to tell them?

They're never going to like him if I tell them the truth.

And it's not something I can just spit out at breakfast.

'Hey guys, how's your eggs? Oh and by the way, my boyfriend Adrien is homeless, and lives on the streets!'

Yeah. That would go over just dandy.

I could see it now, the sympathetic looks from Lexa, and the shock in Jared's eyes.

Poor Adrien.

But it's not his fault.

See, when he was sixteen, his parents cut him off. But he's been dating his girlfriend for the past four years, he figured he'd be okay.

She agreed. Her parents had no problem in him sticking around.

Until he turned, eighteen that is, and made his relationship illegal.

He didn't even want to do anything with the girl. But she wanted sex, and he didn't want to lose her.

So he gave in. Because what else would you do? Obviously he wasn't a virgin, so there goes that excuse.

And for her, how else would she see that he really loved her, of he denied her the one thing she truly wanted?

She couldn't.

So he did it. And five months later, her parents found out, in the form of morning sickness and a newly discovered strip testing positive.

Adrien was kicked out, back to the streets. To this day, he hasn't met his daughter.

On second thought, that seems a bit much for breakfast. Maybe it's more of a lunch conversation.

I chuckle.

Nope. Just another thing needed to be kept to myself.

I sigh, finally rolling out of bed and getting up, not even bothering to change out of my pajamas.

"Lexa." I open her door, after a brief elevator ride, "Are you up? You lazy ass, it's eleven."

"Agh." She groans, looking up at me, before glancing around her room, and running a hand through her ponytail as her other hand adjusts her pajama top, "I just had the weirdest dream.."

AUTHORS NOTE

This is the longest update this book has ever had. I hope you all enjoyed it! Also thanks for 400 followers. You all are so amazing.

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