Fact no.37: Enemies-to-lovers is the best trope out there

APRIL

Turns out a change of scenery was just what I needed. During the next days, Soph and Nini make sure that we have a schedule so filled that Dia and I don't even have time to think of how sad we are. After lounging that day in the pool with the named margaritas, and us two ending up sobbing for hours, the girls changed their strategy. The next day, we all went sailing. Alec and Caden joined us too, and even if they were confused or annoyed we crashed their double date trip, they didn't let it show. We even got to swim with some fishies and Caden taught us all some cool jumps. The next day we went to visit Monte Carlo. And to make the Monaco experience complete, we went on a shopping spree. The guys again came with us. They were used as "holders" the whole day, them literally holding our clothes and bags. Soph and Alec missed for two hours though, since Soph had a photoshoot with Dior planned. They asked us if we want to come with them, but Nini, Caden, Dia and I preferred to hit the Starbucks. The day after that we went to Nice and went along the promenade at the beach, went for a swim and walked through the city streets. I understood what Nini meant with paparazzi then. They really where everywhere. Yet we all acted like we didn't notice them so it wasn't so bad. The day after we visited Cannes and even met some film stars living there. And the day that followed we went for another sail.

I almost didn't notice the time going by. Were it not for the memories of me and Noah filling my head. Or the way I wake up every night after a nightmare. Then stroll to the bathroom to check on Dia. She has been having nightmares ever since that night. And throws up every night. Soph, Nini and I are always there, trying to calm her down and remind her she's safe. She wakes up screaming at someone, yelling "Let me go" or "Stop". As she opens her eyes, she cries.

I am sunk on the floor, with my back against the wall. Dia went back to sleep, and I remained to watch over her. Nini, Soph and I take turns during the night. Nini is next to me now, Soph being in a phone call with her family. They are telling her the schedule for September. The galas and balls she has to attend. I don't think it's going so well, since she's been in there for over three hours. Alec is with her in the room, Caden is next to us, also leaning against the wall, sitting on the floor. Nini's head is tilted on his shoulder, my head tilted on hers.

"I can't believe everything that happened", I whisper. I can feel Nini nod.

"Me neither", she whispers.

We spend the rest of the night in silence, staring in the darkness. I fall asleep at one point. I wake up in my bed, tucked in some fresh blankets.

I decide to go for a run the next day. It's almost noon and the rest have left for a walk throughout the city. I needed some time alone. To be able to think about everything that happened. Clear my thoughts. I haven't run the last few days. Haven't done that in a while. Not ever since what happened. I've been sleeping so few and wake up to tired to move.

But today, I need to change something. Anything.

I run along the promenade of Monte Carlo. I think I stop every five meters to take a picture. Every five meters. The view is so beautiful. This place doesn't feel like a place. But a dream.

As I go back inside the yacht, I say hello to Christine, one of the people working on the boat, and head to my room.

I freeze as I open the handle and try not to scream.

For lying in front of me is Jerry.

The place I stabbed him in is sewed back in place in form of a heart. The sewing is not the best, but it holds the plushie from falling apart.

"Jerry", I whisper and go to him. I kneel in front of the teddy bear to take him better in. He seems to be sad. And then I think how sad I must be if I already started seeing plushies as sad.

"He's missing you", a familiar voice tones from behind. The blood stops inside me at the sound of it.

Noah.

He's here.

I don't want to turn around.

Curiosity beats me.

I turn around.

He's leaning against the door. He's wearing a black T-Shirt, a pair of jeans and some sneakers. He looks exhausted. Like he hasn't slept in a while. His brown eyes are faded red. Like he's been crying lately.

I have seen him cry only very rarely.

"I've been missing you too", he adds, his voice showing how much he's been hurting.

He cheated on you, April. Again.

"What are you doing here?", I ask him, my voice cold. He doesn't need to see I am hurting too.

"You left without even giving me the chance of explaining what happened. I needed to find you. To tell you the truth", he says.

"What? That you cheated on me?", I hiss at him. He swallows hard.

"Precious, I swear I haven't touched any another woman since the beginning of Summer. Way before we even got together. I didn't cheat on you", he explains.

"Oh, really? Then who is Blue-Eyes?", I yell at him.

"She is indeed a girl I fucked. Months ago. I don't even remember it. She must have got bored and texted. But I swear I didn't touch her since I came together with you", he explains.

I don't believe him. Not with the photo.

"Then why did she send you a picture of her boobs?", I ask him, my tone more like a threaten. "And why did she say you sent her a picture of your...?"

"I did. I did send a picture of my...Months ago. Nothing happened between us since then. I swear."

I still don't believe him.

"Please leave", I tell him, pointing towards the door.

"Precious, please don't do this..."

I don't back down. "Please leave, Noah."

He sighs, clearly paining, and walks away. He stops though. Mid-way. And turns around to look at me again.

"I didn't know she still had my number", he begins. I can't face him. I look at the ground. "I didn't know she still wanted something from me. I would have blocked her if I would have known. Because now, I lost the most important part of my life. You."

He swallows hard and takes a deep breath. I dare to look up at him. He's shaking so hard.

"I have loved you for days, months, years", he cries our loud. Tears start rolling down his face. He wipes them out at first, probably still trying to seem like the though guy. He stops wiping the tears away at one point. And lets them roll down his cheeks, so that he can feel them. Feel the pain. He continues talking: "I have loved you all this time. It killed me having to swear at you, call you names when I only ever wanted to call you mine. I wanted to kiss you every time I looked at you. And every time I heard you talk to Kai about how happy you are now as a law major, all I wanted to yell was That's-my-girl. And tell the world how incredibly proud I am of you."

More tears roll down his face. Some roll down mine.

"I have loved and lost you", Noah says. "I screwed up. And I paid the price. The person I loved most decided to hate me. And I understood. For how wrong I did you, I understood. I deserved it. But my heart never understood. It continued loving you every single fucking day. And every single day was a nightmare, not being able to be with you."

"I thought that I could find you in someone else. I knew you hated me and wanted nothing to do with me. So I began to get laid with others. But I never felt anything. Not like I did with you. A smile of yours already has me burning. Imagine what your touch does. I gave up fucking as soon as my head understood there is no way to run away from you. You are the one for me."

I honestly think I might collapse any moment now.

"I tried to change. Be a better guy for you. And I hoped it would be enough. Hoped I was enough. And then you looked at me again with that look. And we got together. And I honestly thought I was the luckiest guy on Earth. For many have loved and lost. But my love came back to me. I would have given you my world. I still would. Anything to see you happy. Because just being with you makes me happy. You are my happiness."

He take a deep breath. "But then that bitch texted me", he says, his voice breaking. "And I lost you again."

I think he might collapse too now.

My feet have already started shaking.

"And I am left as before. Broken, without you. I guess I just wanted you to know that I will wait for you, April. No matter how much time it takes. I screwed up the last time. Thinking I could find you in someone else. I can't. I know that now. Because there is no one else like you. There is no one that pushes my buttons like you, leaving me completely defenceless. There is no one that makes me smile the way you do. There is no one that makes me laugh the way you do. There is no one who knows me the way you do. No one I love the way I love you."

He takes a step closer. I thought I would push him away, but I don't. My heart screams no.

"I love you, precious. Now, tomorrow and forever. And I know you don't trust me. How could you? But I plan on giving you every reason to do so. I know you already gave me too many chances. And can understand if you would say that you deserve better than me. I do. You do deserve better than me. You don't deserve someone who acted as foolish as I did. I can't promise I will like the guy who gets to be the luckiest and be together with you. Will I want to kill him every second of every day? Yes. But I won't do it. For, if he would make you happy, then I would be happy knowing you are."

"But I also hope that guy could be me. I hope I could be that one. The luckiest. I love you, April Davis. I love you."

I don't seem to remember what breathing is. I hated Noah Coin. I hated him with every single nerve, every cell of my body. But I also loved him. Still do.

Fuck it. I think I am madly in love with Noah Coin.

And he screwed up. He did a mistake. But he learned from it. And we grew. We moved on. The both of us. And we were brought by life together again.

Maybe I deserve better than him.

But he is the one I want.

"Noah", I say. He takes a deep breath and sighs.

"I know. I am leaving now", he says, turning to walk away.

What the heck?!

"Noah", I call after him again, stopping him. He turns around and I smile at him. Hope flickers in his eyes.

"I hope you won't kill the one I'll be together with", I say and every inch of hope disappears from his eyes. So I continue: "Because it would be damn hard to live without my run lover."

"What?", he asks surprised. He clearly stopped breathing. I only smile brighter.

"I think I'm in love with you, Noah Coin. I think I might be crazy for you. You said I don't deserve you. Maybe I don't. But screw it, I love you."

He smiles and comes even closer, wrapping his hands around me. I forgot how much this made me burn. How many butterflies it set free.

"You love me?", he asks me confused.

"You make it sound impossible", I tell him chuckling.

"That's because it is more than impossible. It is a dream."

"I love you, Noah Coin", I repeat, for him to understand it. "Do you? Love me?"

"I love you too, April Davis. More than anyone can ever love. I love you."

"Alright then", I whisper at him. Then lift myself on my toes to reach his face. And I kiss him.

He lets a muffed cheer and I chuckle. I wrap my hands around his neck and he pulls me closer.

I guess that's how it was always supposed to be. Us two. April and Noah. Noah and April. Then ones who loved and hated. But most importantly, the ones who love.

"Never let me go again", I whisper at him between kisses.

"Never", he promises. "I am yours til the end of time, precious. I'm never letting you go again."

I smile at that.

Maybe Noah Coin isn't such a prick after all.