43. Closure

It's been a long time

And seeing the shape of your name

Still spells out pain

It wasn't right

The way it all went down

Looks like you know that now

Jenna

"You okay?" I lean against the bar as i cautiously look towards the door awaiting my teammates arrival...

More Paige than anyone else.

Kate smirks raising the corona beer bottle to her lips before looking at me, "Just thinking.."

"Penny for your thoughts?" I nod my bottle towards the bar tender indicating for another as Kate does the same before looking over her shoulder at Caitlin who's flirting with some cheerleader making us both chuckle.

"I can't help but think-" She shakes her head trying to find the words to say to, "what do you think we would be if you had stayed?"

"In terms of us?"

"Don't be stupid Jenn.."

"i-" I shake my head before giving her a tight lipped smile, "Kate, before Caitlin convinced you to go back to Iowa basketball this year for your last year, you would have been leaving me— wether if that was for the W or real life.. a-and I..." I swallow hard, "had a hard time believing i could let you go..."

"So you left instead.."

"Don't start this Kate.."

"I'm serious Jenn, you couldn't watch me leave so you made me watch you.."

"You act like i was the one who disappeared off the face of the earth and completely forgot about you.."

A silence grows between us as the bar tender hands us new bottles, "I could never forget us," She smiles down at me, "not even if I tried. I could never forget you, Jenna Midow,"

"But you would try to forget me?"

"Tried is the definition of us.." She whispers raising the new bottle to her lips taking a sip, "i tried everything.. new girls, new life.. yet you— you always found a way to stick around even at another school.." She chuckles in disbelief, "and for the first couple months it was torcher— seeing your records you broke hung in the gym, watching a freshmen take your locker, your number.. it was all.." She shakes her head, "really hard.."

"But then ?"

"But then it wasn't, I finally came to terms of why you left and why you needed to.. I understood, of course after Cait bugging me for a while about it.. But then i saw you play with her.."

"Paige?"

"Number 5."

"She has a name Kate.." I chuckle

"Oh i know — a big one too.." She smiles, "i saw you two play and —" She stops to think for a moment, "you never smiled playing with me and Cait the way you smile with Paige, Jenna.."She nods accepting what was already there, "And i asked Caitlin about you two and she told me.. kinda everything i guess..and then it all made sense.."

"I didn't come here because of Paige, Kate.."

"No, i know.." She nods, "I meant, it made sense why you couldn't allow yourself to love me as much as you loved her Jenn, just like you, she was everywhere without really being there to you. Carved into your heart forever.."

"I did love you Kate..."

"I know you did Jenna.." She finally looks up from her hands to look at me, "But i was just a stop on the way to your soulmate.." She nods, "and i'm okay with that— because I got the chance to be loved by someone like you who taught me that i wasn't just Kate Martin, guard on the Iowa basketball team or Caitlin Clark's teammate.. I was Kate, coffee loving, great aunt, and amazing friend... Kate."

"You know— you're not an easy person to track down Kate Martin.." I smile bumping her shoulder softly, "You barley post on instagram, you only text back at 3am, but yet here you are.."

"What are you trying to say Midow.."

"Why'd you come Kate.. If you knew all of this?"

"I didn't come to get my girlfriend back — Caitlin already gave me the lecture" She smirks, "I came to get my best friend back, to make sure she's doing okay out here in the basketball city.. Living that dream she told me about."

My eyes begin to water as I put down my bottle pulling Kate into a hug, "You have no idea how much i miss you.."

"Me too Freshmen," I could feel her smile into the hug, "you know i'd rather get orders from you then Caitlin though, she's a little to nice about it after I miss a three.."

"Damn 5 years and you still miss threes.. washed up are we?" I chuckle pulling back from the hug as her hand lingers on my waste — right between where my shirt ended and my skin began to show.

"Now, i'm just going to pretend that's the beer in you talking.."

"You know i'm always here to keep you on your toes Martin.. someone has to challenge you somehow.."

"I better see you on that court in March Midow.."

"You sure about that because i'm going to have a lot of fun beating your ass.."

Kate puts a hand on her heart faking hurt, "Gosh you know how to shove the knife and twist huh.." She jokes.

The door to the front opens makes us both look towards the entrance as no other than the 2024 Uconn husky's walk into the bar causing everyone around to cheer as Paige Bueckers leads her pack.

I swallow hard as her icy blue eyes meet mine before flashing to Kate as she clenches her jaw, i could see the jealousy from a mile away before Kate removes her hand quickly from my waist.

"Don't wanna get the big dog mad.." She chuckles making me smirk hitting her shoulder, "What she looks like she may possibly bite my head off if i touch you.."

"She's softer than she looks.." I smile my eyes not leaving the blonde as she buys herself and who i'm assuming Azzi a drink.

"So now tell me," Kate adjusts in her chair to look at Paige and back to me, "Why the fuck haven't you two said anything to eachother yet—"

"We talk all the time Kate.." I shake my head knowing what she meant but dodging the question as I take a sip of my drink.

"You know what i meant asshole.."

I shrug, "i- me — Us, Paige and I.. we are complicated, coming from a lot of history.. It's— i don't know.. Complicated is the best way to describe it.."

"Have you tried?"

"Tried what?"

"Telling her how you feel?"

"I—" I let out a shaky breath, "like i said it's complicated.."

"Well you two aren't fooling anyone but yourselves..."

"I have no idea what you're talking about Martin.."

"That's why you guys haven't taken your eyes off eachother since she walked in here? That's why she's currently burning holes into my back with her eyes? You know exactly what i'm talking about Jenn.."

"I don't even think she likes me that way Kate.. It's like an ego thing to her at this point.."

"She's in love with you Jenna.."

"How do you even know— you've been here for a day."

Kate smirks turning to look over her shoulder meeting the eyes of the blonde before turning back to me, "because i used to look at you just like she does—"

I smile letting out a shaky breath before turning towards Caitlin who now was kissing the brunette cheerleader she just had met.

"I'm gonna.." Kate laughs pointing towards the couple..

"Yeah.. I think you should" I chuckle watching as Kate makes her way over to cock block Caitlin— just like old times, I laugh hard as Caitlin pushes Kate away as she hooks her arm over her neck to whisper something into her ear making her roll her eyes.

As I turn back to the bar i realized that Paige had disappeared, only to make eye contact with Azzi sorry eyes as confusion flashes on my face while she walks over to me..

"Where?"

"She left.. um... she said she wasn't feeling well and wanted to get rest before the game.." Azzi nods.

Unfortunately I knew Paige too well to know exactly what she was doing.

She was avoiding me.