Chapter 16

Having lived her life in a well organized, sedate castle where overtly loud noises were not tolerated and servants were well out of sight unless it was mealtimes, the Highland keep was a bit of a culture shock when Evie entered. Boisterous boys ran around wielding wooden swords, what appeared to be the kitchen had people meandering in and out. When Hammond led her to the hall, the warm, red and gold carpet stood out in the middle, with furniture and armchair littered throughout the area. A long dining table was off on the right with a doorway that connected the kitchen to it, which was preparing for the nooning meal.

When Hammond entered, his figure cut a silence throughout the hall, but it was only as if people were taking a moment to reabsorb their laird's return. Only a few seconds passed when a loud whoop broke it, and soon the whole hall reverberated as the servants greeted the leader of their clan. Evie stared, absorbing all of it in surprise. It was obvious to her that Hammond was well loved by his people, perhaps a little too well loved, as a few buxom maids sidled up to him.

He fended them off with few words however, before pulling Evie towards him, addressing everyone to introduce her as his cousin. "Gillian, would ye please bring Evie up to her room? We'll sup in just a bit, once ye've had the time to freshen up."

The younger MacKenzie willingly obliged, and Evie soon found herself being led up the stony stairwell to the second floor, lighted by sconces. Their footsteps echoed as the girls walked past two doorways, before Gillian finally stopped, her pale yellow gown swishing as she pushed the heavy wooden door open.

When Evie entered, the large bed on a brown rug had already been turned down,a fire burning low to keep off the Highland chill, with a basin of clean water on a side table and her belongings lying in a corner on a settee. "Tis yer room, mine is just two doors down, and Hammond's is just opposite mine."

She smiled at her cousin, observing her supposed room for the next week or so, yet was unable to resist asking. "What... about, Connor's? Does he sleep in the Keep as well? Or does... he have his own place?" While Evie knew it was very obvious, she couldn't help her curiosity. Trying to fight back her flush when Gillian gave a coy smile, Evie averted her eyes as the teen sashayed in her room and swung her legs from the tall bed, giving a cheeky smile at her.

"Why would ye want to ken aboot our fair Captain, cousin?"

"I...I just... We've spoken over the past few weeks, and I'm... curious, is all."

The younger girl laughed, not fooled at all by her cousin's aversion to her question. She had brief moments to converse with her childhood playmate, but that was enough to glean the frustration her best friend wore in his eyes. Gillian had known Connor all her life, and her intelligence made it even easier to notice the new comers cautious nature with her, especially after the way she had greeted Connor upon their return.

"We've offered him a room within the Keep, but he prefers to keep the company of his men, so he bunks with them in the barracks behind the Keep." a coy smile played again, cheekiness becoming obvious had Evie been watching, with her next words. "He does however, know his way well around the Keep, as he's been here all his life. He particularly knows the way to my room..."

Evie's eyes flashed as she looked up in surprise at Gillian, only noticing she had been caught as her eyes registered Gillian's laughter the next moment. "And me brother's room, o'course! But I caught ye there, dinna I?"

Unable to resist any longer, she groaned and fell on the bed next to Gillian, burying her face in her hands. The younger one shifted closer and tentatively placed a palm on Evie's back, stroking it as she asked. "What happened with ye two? I've never seen Connor look that way afore, and I've known him all my life."

"I've tried to explain it to him, but... just, circumstances do not favour us, is all." Evie tried to downplay. Yet with just a little encouragement from Gillian, the whole story came pouring out, down to the details between her and Fabian which had initially complicated matters, and how her heritage would possibly be the biggest roadblock.  At the end of it, the English bred lady finally chanced a look at her cousin, finding a thoughtful look.

"Connor's a big idiot, that much I agree, but do ye know his story, Evie?"

She shook her head, a reaction that had Gillian rolling her eyes. "I should'a expected it. Connor isna' the type to tell people aboot it. Even Hammond and I dinna find out aboot it till we were teens."

"Was it bad?"

"Depending on how ye look at it. Tisna' my story to tell, but I think ye should know it, at least. T'would help ye understand why Connor reacted how he did when ye told him he would be an English lord."

"I know all of you don't fancy the English..."

"Nae, Connor's reasons run much deeper then simply it being a matter of where we come from." Gillian paused, and then picked up Evie's hand to lead her to dressing table, taking apart her rather gnarled chignon, running a wet brush through as she spoke.

"Connor came to the Keep when he was a young kid. I was only a babe, at the time. I think around four  years or so? All I remember was Papa riding back with a terrified looking kid of about Hammond's age. He was covered in blood, whether it was or wasna' his, I dinna know. I do know though, that he spent months, years even, not walking near the kitchen. Now, ye should know that Mrs. O'Leary is a kindhearted soul. She doted on Connor and us like her own, especially after our Mama's death. Connor loved Mrs. O'Leary, but it wasna' till when I got to thirteen did I find out Connor avoided the kitchen for he hated fire, and the sound of knives."

"His village had been torched by the English, years before the signing of the Act of Union. The Gilroy clan were suspected of being Jacobite supporters, and were punished with no trial. Connor had been the son of the laird at the time. Papa had gone to help, but by the time he got there, the Redcoats had burned all of the lands in Gilroy Glade. Limbs were separated from bodies, eyes wide but lifeless... he thought he had failed them, but on his trip back home, he passed the Redcoat camp."

"Connor had been shoved under a burlap sack and her mother had overturned a trolley to hide him. They had found him after they had made his father bleed to death, and raped his mother in front of both him and his dying sire. They had then taken Connor back to camp, closed him in shackles, and the leader of the Redcoat camp, some devil by the name of Randall had led him around like a dog."

"Papa had bided his time for a few days before reinforcements finally arrived, and they managed to save Connor from the Redcoat clutches, but not before he went through his own share of suffering. The details of that, he would probably know better, but his condition when he came wasna' good. It took a whole three years before he would even laugh and play with us."

The whole time Gillian told of the story, the horror that had been within Evie had just grew. Chained like a dog? Watch his parents get raped and die in front of him? They were horrors Evie wouldn't inflict on her greatest enemy, much less a child of such tender age. It was no wonder he had been guarded the whole time he was in England, how he refused to join a ton ball, and how he looked so horrified when Evie had told him of the consequence his choice of her would bring. Her heart ached for the little boy who suffered, along with the guarded warrior she had come to know and love, for she did love him. For every chivalrous note in his heart, every protective fibre in him, every handsome gene and every husky timbre of his voice.

Evie didn't even notice that Gillian had brushed out all the dust in her hair, braiding the red locks over her shoulder, and proceeded to pull out a new dress. "C'mon now, lets change oot of this dusty gown. Ye look like ye've been rolling around in the ground."

Her thoughts tumbled around each other as Gillian helped her change into her forest green kirtle, trying to sort her own mind out. With his story she now knew, she couldn't hope he would choose her over his hatred for the English, because Evie knew that every fibre  of dislike he held towards her own people was justly called for. But she couldn't help herself but wish that their circumstances had been different. If she had been a Highlander born and bred in Scotland, would things have been different?

"Do ye plan to see him, Evie?"

"I don't think I can. I thought it was blind hatred for the English that ruled his choices, but now I understand that his dislike is of good reason. How could I ask him to come with me, when I know what my own people have done to him?"

Evie turned her wide,  green eyes at her cousin, loss shimmering within their mossy depths. She really didn't know what to do. Just being around Connor made her smile, being in the Highlands made her more alive then she's ever felt before, and she'd do anything to be able to stay with him, but how could she just leave  her father? While Gregory Verrick may be unreasonable at times, he had still brought Evie up with everything she's ever wanted. The girl couldn't fathom just abandoning the old man.

Gillian sighed, seeing the despair in the green eyes. In truth, she would love to help them, for she loathed seeing her best friend in such a black mood. Plus, it'd be for the benefit for his men as well, judging by the way he was killing them in the training arena now.

"Does Connor... Do you and him-"

"Heaven's, no." Gillian almost immediately answered, the tone of mortification and horror in her voice enough to convince Evie she spoke the truth. "Connor brought me up with Hammond. They are my parents, especially after Papa died following Mama. I love him like a brother, but that's it."

"Does he not have anyone, then?"

"He has his fair share of maidens, but not thoughtlessly for sure. Ye canna fault him for being a man, after all?"

In a way, Evie guessed it was true, yet a twinge in her heart jumped when Gillian mentioned that he's had his share. Does that mean he has one now?

---

"Nae, Brianne. I havena time for tis nonsense right now."

"But Connor, ye've been gone for so long, I thought ye would want some-"

"Nae." The dark haired warrior cut her off with a stern glare, and walked off towards the back of the keep, intending to wash the dirt and grime off after a session with his men. While Connor often took meals with the family up at the Keep, he had no wish to sit there looking at Fabian and Evie while they chatted and laughed with the MacKenzie's. They were his best friends, but right now his mood was so foul, he wasn't even sure what he would do now.

His body thrummed with the after effects of training, soothed as he dumped a whole bucket of cold water on him, dousing even his kilt and belt in the water. It was a shocking cold, especially as the sun set and the twilight wind dipped in temperature, but it was a shock that Connor's body needed. Brianne had been his usual tumble before Hammond had whisked him away for their trip to England, but after just two months or so away, and he didn't even react when the brunette, buxom lass came up to him as he kept his blade.

Then again, Connor also suspected it wasn't entirely because of the time he's been away.

Scowling again as he dipped the bucket in for another dousing, his body shivered at the extreme conditions he was putting himself in, knowing at the same time he deserved it. He had been an arse. How could he have frozen, when Evie had given her reason? Did he not give the same reasons to her? Like it or not, they were both bound by their circumstances, he to the Highlands and she unwilling to leave her father. But she loved the Highlands! Connor ached to see that smile on her face everyday, through the month that she had been riding with them. Her cheeks glowed, her smile was contagious, her spirit burned brighter then he had ever seen within the Keep.

"Tisn't fair to her either, Connor. Imagine if ye were asked to leave here? I dinna like to remind this of ye, but remember how ye felt when your clan was felled by the Redcoats, and ye were taken away from everything ye loved?"

"She-"

"She isna' like them. None of them were. Tis been years, brother. Give yerself a chance. Give her a chance."

"She doesna want to do with me."

"Have ye asked her?"

It had been a curious conversation, when Gillian had ambushed him in the hallways when she had been told Connor wouldn't be joining them for dinner. In fact, he's been actively avoiding them since they had returned to the Keep that morning, yet Gillian had hunted him down and scowled as she left after their brief but poignant conversation.

Should he ask her?

In truth, a part of Connor was terrified of her answer if he did. What if she said no? But what if she said yes? A growl echoed deep in his throat as he fiercely dunked the bucket in the well of water again, pouring the icy water all over himself again in the darkness.

---

Mornings had always been wonderful to Evie once she had entered the Highlands. Initially, it had started with Hammond enforcing the fact that they needed to start early to make quick time to get to the Keep earlier, which had dug Evie up at the crack of dawn as compared to her usual slow, noon awakening.

But it had eventually evolved into her actually enjoying the crisp morning air, the fresh dew on the grass, birds singing and Mother Nature waking up in general. They were very different to the bustle of London streets she hears in the Karlsborough townhouse during the Season, or even the busy sounds of servants cleaning up in Cavalon Castle, as horses scraped their gravel pathway in their well-manicured garden.

There was just something about the wild, untamed mantle in the Highlands that invigorated Evie, evoked her sense of adventure again as she itched to go out to see every corner, to discover everything.

Grabbing her shift and changing out of her night dress as the sun reached its warm fingers, the girl quickly bunned her red hair up, loose tendrils falling against the sleeves of her ocean green kirtle, pushing the heavy door of her room open before hurrying down. In her heart, Evie thanked heavens that her room was only on the second floor, for their hallways seemed even more cavernous then Cavalon Castle's.

In a way, she needed some time off ever since arriving at the Keep. She enjoyed the warmth that seemed to ooze out of the Keep, the friendliness everyone had with each other be it servant or soldier alike. It was very different from the way hierarchy was snootily kept in London, but Evie enjoyed the casual sense that the Highlanders kept here, which made her feel a whole lot more at ease with herself.

No, it wasn't the ones around her that made her uneasy, but one particular person. A brooding, darkly handsome captain of the MacKenzie warriors that Evie had barely seen since they had arrived.

A part of her was frustrated, for she knew he was actively avoiding her. A part of her was relieved, for she knew they were both caught in a rock and a hard place. After coming here, she now understood why Connor would never be contented as an English lord. The stuffiness of her people would choke the life out of him, all that untamed wildness that she loved so much in the first place. Yet at the same time, it hurt to think that she wasn't worth his choice, even a little sacrifice on his end.

But how could she ask him to give all of this up?

Her heart grew heavier as she stepped out, lifting only a little when Evie took a deep breathe, relishing the fresh, crisp air that was quite different compared to the smog that hung heavy across London's cobbled streets. Picking up her skirts so the edges would not be dampened by the morning dew, the girl began picking her way down the steps of the Keep, interest piqued by the small patches of herb gardens she saw growing.

Not even noticing her way as she focused on descending, a gasp escaped her when she slipped on a particular damp part, and would have fallen had a strong arm not caught her by her waist, hauling her in to a firm chest. Caught off guard and winded, Evie found it even harder to find her balance when she looked up into a pair of familiar, obsidian eyes.

"Careful, tis wetter in the mornings, here in the Highlands. Yer shoes would need to be reinforced."

"H-how?" she asked breathlessly, a seconds longer pause then usual from her momentary shock. The deep timbre of his voice, that husky note was something Evie didn't realize she had painfully missed, until he had spoken. She could feel his chest vibrating with each syllable, and it was with some reluctance that she stepped back when he loosened his hold on her.

"We add what we call 'soles' to the pads of the shoes. They help against slipping easily. Gives more grip."

"And these are made of?"

"Netting. Gillian thought of it actually. She's responsible for most of the unusual things you see around the Keep, her mind is curious and most of her... little experiments tend to work. Most of it."

"She comes up with things?"

"Aye. To improve how we work. Have ye seen our fire grates? Gillian asked the ironsmith to wind rods of iron together, and hammered them into certain shapes so Mrs. O'Leary could cook withoot having to continuously hold on to the pot, or arrange rocks together."

"She's a bright girl."

Silence fell, awkward between the two as Evie averted her eyes and Connor fidgeted, unsure of how he should continue. He had not meant to follow her, but as she had exited the doors of the keep, Connor somehow found himself following her. He told himself that he just wanted to ensure of her safety, but he knew he was kidding himself. His eyes was practically starved of the sight of her vibrant red hair, her milky skin that made his fingers itch to drag themselves across her cheeks.

"Where... are ye going?"

"I was thinking of visiting the herb gardens. I'm very curious on how things are around here."

"Tisna' safe around here, lass. Ye have to be more careful on where ye go, especially since yer not familiar."

"I didn't think the herb gardens are very far."

"Tisn't, but ye dinna what..." He paused, recognizing the mutinous look she wore, and hid a chuckle. His little firestarter did not appreciate being coddled nor commanded, he remembered. "Never mind. Come, I shall come with ye. Do ye have an interest in the healing arts, then?"

"Kind of. I had finished all of my books in the library. I was bored and moved on to medical literature."

"Yer faither doesna let you out alot?"

"He needs lessons on being a father. He is kind, but he isn't sure on what he should do, ever since Mother died."

"But he is kind?"

"He is."

She smiled, a gentle smile that made his heart ache even more. It wasn't one of hatred, nor dislike. How could he take her away from her only family? Gillian had been right, he had had unfair expectations.

Pausing as she bent down to gently observe herbs or brushes, they walked in silence towards the further ends of the gardens, nearing the Keep walls. "What lies beyond the walls?"

"Forests. Game. Tis our hunting grounds, though we dinna own them."

"Who owns them?"

"No one. Clan grounds are protected through the walls we build up. Beyond that, tis neutral for they provide meat for clans surrounding it."

"I thought you guys pillaged and warred." she teased, a familiar lilt in her voice that Connor was beginning to realize he missed very much. Chancing a glance at her, his heart missed a beat at the shadow of a smile playing around her green eyes. "We used to."

"Oh? And what happened?"

"The Act of Union. The clans still do not get together with all, but we no longer have large scale battles."

"You guys still fight though?"

"Aye, we do. Mostly just familial history that we canna simply undo."

"Do we have any?"

Before Connor could answer, a rustle caught his attention, suddenly waking all his senses on alert. Just as he turned though, he felt a heavy force fall against the back of his skull, weakening his knees and his body. The last thing he heard was a muffled scream, but Connor could only manage a weak "Ev-" before he felt his body hitting the ground, and a coolness overtaking his senses.