5. Unaware Effects

I squeezed my way through the packed subway whose patrons likened sardines in a can. I looked at the address Tyler had sent me before I looked on the tiny display at the head of the subway car. My stop was next.

I slid my way through the men in business uniforms, teenagers, and mothers holding their children until I was standing in front of the door. I got into my the-subway-is-stopping-so-open-your-stance-so-you-won't-fall-on-your-face-or-butt stance just before the subway lurched to a stop, causing some people to stumble or tightly hold onto their overhead bars before the doors smoothly slid open. I quickly hurried out as the sea of newcomers rushed into the train like a flood.

I looked up at the not-so-helpful signs that were hanging from the dingy ceiling, a gush of air whipping past my face as the train I'd just been on pulled off. My heart rate increased with each step I took closer and closer. Even when I emerged from the subway, I felt a wave of heat rush to me. I looked around me at a part of New York I hadn't really seen before other than passing through. The buildings were tall and leaned in on me, but not the way they did back home. The feeling in the air shifted as I walked closer and closer to my final destination. Trash lined the edges of the street and shadows clung to the alleyways between the close buildings.

My eyes alternated between the map on my phone and my unfamiliar surroundings until I got to the building I was looking for. I walked up the minimal stairs and pressed the buzzer for Tyler's apartment, number 7, my favorite number. Grime lined the bottoms of the discolored walls and a slight stench filled the air. The sound of a baby crying filled my ears, causing me to cringe and step away from the buzzer. "Shh, Seren, it's okay," Tyler gently said. "Dang, you got some lungs for a baby."

"Ty?" I asked, a slight grin tugging at the edge of my lips as I imagined his big frame trying to console such a small, fragile baby.

"Hey, Addi. I'll buzz you in. I'm on the second floor, third door on the right."

"'Kay, thanks," I said as a low click filled the air, signifying the door had been unlocked. I pulled it open and instantly, the smell of sweat and cigarette smoke hit me in the face. I honestly had to resist the urge to turn around and walk out. But the boy I'd committed spending today with was waiting for me less than twelve feet above me. I couldn't stop now.

I made my way to the stairwell and climbed up to the second floor. My footsteps loudly echoed in the horror-movie-esque stairwell. Dead spiders and other insects were scattered about in the corners of the well, and a weird sense of relief flooded over me when I emerged out to the second floor. I instantly saw apartment seven. Well, I heard it before I saw it, and I couldn't help but chuckle as I approached. Serenity's wails filled the air and invaded my head, like a siren's song. I waited a few moments before I knocked on the door.

After a few moments, the door opened, revealing a shirtless Tyler donning a pair of black sweats and a durag on his head and a crying toddler in his arms. "Hey," he said with a smile.

"Hey," I said as he started bouncing his baby sister on his hip.

"Come in. come in," he said as he stepped out of the way.

"Thanks," I said as I stepped in. The first thing I noticed was how clean his apartment was, a stark contrast to the rest of the building he lived in, though I wasn't surprised. Everything about Tyler was well put together, so why would his home be any different?

"I'm sorry about all this, I know we were supposed to meet at the theater, but my dad called in and said he had to work late today, so I had to call a babysitter last minute and now we're waiting for her. With any luck, we'll only be a little bit late."

"It's okay," I said as he started rubbing his baby sister's back, slowly calming her down. "Can I help at all? I mean, I've dealt with this multiple times with all three of my little siblings."

"Nah, you're good, man, but thanks," Ty said with a slight chuckle that revealed his deep dimples. "Sit, do you want some water?"

"Sure," I said as I sat on the couch and took in my surroundings. The apartment was small, but it felt very home-y. There were pictures of Tyler, Serenity, and who I assumed to be their father all over the house. The house looked very lived-in. Small stains on the carpet, chips in the paint. It felt very real.

"Here," he said as he offered me a cooled bottle of water before his attention turned to his sister. "Come here," he softly said as he gently led her head to his bare chest. "It's okay, Seren, it's okay." He kissed her cheeks. "It's okay." He sat down next to me and started humming, the tone rich as it vibrated throughout his chest. I found myself mesmerized as I listened, unable to focus on anything else. The symphony that created the sound made me eager to know what he sounded like when he actually sang.

When he was done, I felt like a snake that had been set free from the charmer's song. "Woah," I breathed out, causing his attention to go from his now sleeping sister to me.

He gave me a shy grin as he looked away. "Thanks. That's my secret weapon to get her to calm down."

"Dude, why haven't you told me you could sing?"

"I mean, I wasn't technically singing, I was humming."

I hit his arm, causing him to softly laugh in an effort to avoid waking his sister. "You know what I mean."

After a few moments, he sobered up. "I don't know man, I just don't tell anybody unless they straight up ask me, then I'll give them a straight-up answer. Just like wit' you: you don't come out telling people you're a writer unless they already know or for some reason, they look at you and think 'huh, that's what a writer looks like' and ask."

"What does a writer even look like?" I asked, slightly joking.

"I don't know, but you ain't it. Now, don't get me wrong, I know you're a master when it comes to creating stories, but bro, you look like the opposite of a writer who just sits alone all day on their computer making up other people's lives in a way you wish yours was. You literally look like the opposite, I don't get it."

I slowly lifted up my hands, looking him dead in the eyes as I did so. "You forgot the most important thing: our incredibly strong fingers from us sitting at home typing and writing all day. I could break bones with a single stroke and they wouldn't even know what happened."

"Strong fingers, huh? You should stop talking about your kinks in front of the baby."

I felt a blush burn itself on my cheeks as I broke eye contact. "Oh, I--uh, I didn't mean it like-"

"Relax, bro, I'm just messin' with you," Tyler laughed as he nudged me with his foot since his hands were too preoccupied with the baby.

I looked up and seeing him fully laughing and not at all weirded out made me relax. I let out a forced chuckle. "Oh, yeah, right."

Just then, there was a soft knock on the door, causing Tyler to let out a breath of relief. "That should be Jorja. Can you open the door for me? My hands are kinda full."

"Yeah," I said before I pushed myself off of the couch and quickly stretched, my bones popping due to their short time not being in use.

"Ew, gross," Tyler said as he scrunched his nose, causing me to laugh. I'd forgotten that Ty had a weird thing about noises being made where they're not supposed to, and, according to him, popping does not belong anywhere near the human body. I bet he still believed that if you popped your bones too much you'd get arthritis or you'd actually break them. I wouldn't put it passed him.

I made my way to the door and opened it. I was instantly met by a tall, slim girl that was about Ty's and I's age, maybe a bit older. She had rich, dark skin that was virtually flawless, and her hair was neatly tucked under a head-wrap with a few curly pieces sticking out. But the thing that struck me was her eyes: they were a mesmerizing gray that could see right through you. Needless to say, she was absolutely gorgeous. "Hi, I'm Jorja. I got a call from Tyler about needing to babysit..." she trailed, her voice smooth like a sailboat being carried across a calm lake.

"Uh, yeah, come in," I said as I stepped aside. She offered me a friendly grin as she stepped in, her friendly grin quickly spreading as her eyes landed on Serenity. "Oh, there's my girl," she gently cooed as she carefully grabbed the sleeping infant and held her in her arms, careful not to wake her.

"Dang, Jo, I don't even get a hi anymore?"

She rolled her eyes. "Hi, Tyler."

"There, that's better," he said with a grin, ignoring her sarcasm. "Thanks again for coming on such short notice. My dad's job has really been working him lately and I already made plans--oh, Jorja, this is Addison by the way. He's the QB for our school. Really good at it, too."

I felt my heart become warm from the compliment, and though it was something I was used to hearing--not to brag-- but it felt different coming from his lips. I waved. "Hi."

"Hi," she said as she started rocking Serenity.

Tyler stood up and used his head to motion for me to follow him. "Let's leave them in peace, and maybe we can make it to the movie in time."

I followed him deeper into the apartment until we were in his room. Like everything else, it was clean, a stark contrast to my own. It was drenched in his masculine, familiar scent. He had various trophies and posters illustrating his accomplishments on his walls. In the corner was a small desk with a computer, keyboard, and headphones, most likely where he worked on his beats and tracks for school. I noticed that he had pictures of him and his father in his room, and I realized that I'd failed to see a picture of his mother. He never really mentioned her either. I wondered why that was.

"I swear, Serenity loves Jorja more than she loves me," Tyler scoffed as he dug through his closet.

"Bro, she was asleep," I pointed out as I sat on the corner of his bed.

"Yeah, for now, but when she wakes up, she'll act like a perfect angel for Jorja, guarantee it. That little girl, so two-faced."

"Unlike you? You do that mess all the time." I poked as he picked out a sweatshirt and slid it over his sinfully toned body. I tore my eyes away as he scoffed.

"I only do it 'cause I have to. I can't get away from certain people so I talk mess about them under my breath and act decent to their face. But that's not being two-faced, not really. Being two-faced would be being overly fake and cheerful. Nah, that ain't it."

"Whatever you say," I said in a sing-song voice, causing him to throw his hanger at me.

"Ow!"

"Next thing that'll come at you is my cleats if you keep it up," he threatened, though a smile was tugging at the edge of his lips before he started digging in his closet for something else. My phone suddenly vibrated in my pocket. I pulled it out, revealing a text from Kyra.

Babygirl <3: hey, u still coming for dinner tmrow?

Me: of course, baby

Babygirl <3: cnt wait. C u then, Addi. Love u

Me: Love u more, babe

"Is that Ky?" Tyler asked as he sat down next to me and started putting on his shoes, now wearing a denim jacket over his hoodie.

"Yeah," I said. "I'm going over to her's tomorrow to make up for lost time."

"Ooh, get it," he teased as he punched me, causing me to laugh.

"Yeah, she's pretty great."

"Yeah, which makes me wonder why she's going out with a loser like you."

I shoved him as he finished tying his shoes. "Screw off."

"Messing with you is so fun," he joked before he sobered up. "So, Kyra told me you know about Azzy's new little boyfriend."

"Yeah, it's crazy. She's growing up."

"You're saying that like she's so much younger than you."

I shook my head. "It's just different. You'll understand when Serenity grows up if she doesn't run off with Jorja forever. It's my job to look out for Azalea, make sure she doesn't get hurt by stupid boys or girls, and I just don't wanna let her down, you know?"

He nodded. "I understand too much. I feel that way with Seren all the time, especially because she's so young and I'm so much older than her and my dad is so busy. I mean, it's not his fault or anything, but growing up the way I have and having to basically help raise her, it hits different, and I know you understand that with your siblings as well. But, if it makes you feel better, my class and Josh's have to work together on a sound design project. We're kind of mentoring them, and I'm Josh's mentor. He seems like a nice kid, but I promise I'll look out and let you know if you need to beat him up, or whatever it is you think you're going to do."

I scoffed, though a grin was tugging at the edge of my lips. "Okay, thanks Ty."

"Don't mention it," he said as he finished tying his shoes and stood up. "Alright, let's go." I got up as he turned off his lights and headed out with me hot on his tail. "Alright, Jorja, we're heading out," Tyler said before he kissed his sleeping sister's cheek. "Thanks again. You know you can call me or my dad if anything happens. Her food is in the fridge, blah, blah, blah."

She cocked a brow. "Ty, why are you talking to me like I haven't been here a hundred times before? I practically live here."

"I know, I know." He leaned over and kissed her cheek, causing a weird feeling to settle within the pit of my stomach. Had I read him all wrong? Was he in a relationship all this time? Why hadn't he told me? No, I shouldn't care. I shouldn't be feeling anything right now. I'm in my own relationship for crying out loud!

So why did every fiber of my being hate seeing his lips touch her?

She grinned up at him as he pulled away. "Keep your dirty lips away from me and go on. It was nice meeting you, Addison."

Her words caught me off guard and I had to quickly put on my friendly persona despite the rage a part of me felt for seeing what I just had. I hated that part of myself. "It was nice meeting you Jorja."

I followed Tyler out the door with him picking his wallet and keys up off the table as we walked by it.

The trip to the movie theater was very quick and was filled with light conversation and laughter. As we traveled from place to place, our arms would sometimes lightly brush or our knees would bump together as we sat on the train, and each time that happened, my body was hyperly aware of it, more aware than it should've been. It was like when someone reminded you that you were breathing and no matter how hard you try to let your body fall back into its own rhythm, you can't help but notice it and try to take in more air than you normally would. Tyler was my air. And as badly as I wanted to suffocate and slip into the dark void of forgetting the feelings he made me feel, every time he would smile or laugh, it made my heart melt. But then Kyra's face would appear in my mind. The phantom fire that would move through me every time we touched would ignite in my veins and my lips would tingle with the soft feeling of her feather-light lips.

It was torture.

"Bro you're not ready for this. I've read reviews and talked to other boys on the team- this movie slaps," Tyler proclaimed as we walked into the AMC just off Times Square.

"Yeah," was all I could say as we walked in, unable to muster anything else as conflict brewed inside of me. Instantly the smell of popcorn filled my nose as my eyes adjusted from the billboard-lit night to the low key lighting of the theater. It was surprisingly empty for the time of day, but I didn't complain. The less time I had to wait, the more time I could spend stoving buttery popcorn and overly sugary candy down my throat and taken out of my life and into the life of someone else, at least for a little bit.

Tyler showed our tickets to the clerk who boredly scanned them and told us our theater number, looking like he'd rather be doing literally anything else instead. We made our way to the concession stand, and since the movie was starting soon, most people were already in their seats, this the lines were pretty short. I bought a jumbo tub of popcorn with extra butter and a side packet of jelly beans to pour in--it sounds gross but it really hit different--while Tyler bought our drinks.

"Bro, this is about to be awesome," Tyler said as we ducked into the dark theater just as the reminders to silence our phones popped up on the screen. We quickly found our seats and as soon as we sat, the movie started, familiar characters popping up on our screen. I looked over at Tyler and even in the dark he just looked so...perfect. The way his eyes told you everything he was thinking, how perfectly flawed he was, the soft way his arm was pressed against mine as our arms sat on the armrest. Most of all, how utterly unaware he was of his effect on me.

And that's what scared me the most, more than any homicidal robot ever could.

***

IDK why it took so long for me to write this. Every time I would try to finish this chapter my brain would just shut off and refuse to cooperate for more than twenty words, so sorry about that. Anyway, I hope y'all enjoyed his chapter and if you did, make sure to comment and vote! Also, stay safe and healthy out there, wash your hands regularly, and have a good spring break (or as good as it can be with the country basically on a soft lock down).

Love y'all- Jordan