Lily&Wardrobe Woes

I had taken the long way home just to clear my mind. I loved "window shopping." It was soothing. What was even more soothing were the hole in the wall book stores I would randomly find on my adventures around NYC. I know I'm a traitor to B&N. Seriously, though. Who gives? I chalked the deuces to that place.

I love the smell of old books, how not one cover looks alike, and how each binding could tell it's own story. I was just browsing the shelves. I would have to wait until that 50,000 paycheck kicked in. I spent two hours sifting through books. As soon as I got home that afternoon, I laid down to merely catch my breathe. I ended up waking at 7, starving. I retrieved my last cup of oodles of noodles, heated it up, and strolled the internet on my laptop until the noodles finally cooled.

I googled the exhibit last Friday. I wanted to see the pieces that I didn't get to do in person because of the debacle and also the reviews of the work. Tea hadn't published her article. Thankfully the pictures posted by the gallery's photographer had missed any mugshots of me.  I saw a few of that jerk off Costa, several of skeleton thin models, and one of my good ole new boss. Then an idea flashed in my mind quickly. Should I do it? Should I google Matt Bonner? I caved. I did it. So many hot pictures. Down girl! What's Wikipedia bio say?...

Matt Bonner- investment developer, philanthropist, and billionaire that's worth 15 billion. At this ridiculousness, I spit out my noodles, landing across the room somewhere. That explains it. That explains his better than anyone attitude. The money has shrunken brain cells or something. I had no leg to stand on in his presence. I was a broke, freckle faced nerd with minimal job skills, a horrible wardrobe, and sarcasm for days. Nerd versus extra rich, chiseled model body, business leader, popular man.

Why was I even caring about all of this? I was there to do a job. Not anything else at all. His only opinion of me should be my upcoming job performance. He was under my skin and I had only known him an added up equivalent of four hours tops. I needed to mentally prepare myself. I needed to give myself a pep talk and scan my discount store wardrobe. Two hours later, it was utterly hopeless. You don't really worry about wearing business attire to work at Barnes and Noble. The wardrobe situation was looking bleak. Black pencil skirt. Check. Now, could I walk in it? Not so much. I was going to have to take the hem up higher, somewhere between mid thigh and knee cap. Sheer purple 3/4 sleeve button up blouse. That would have to work. Black cami underneath. Leopard print ballet flats(thanks Payless shoes). Coral orange cardigan sweater. I tied it all together with a strand of multicolored pink and purple hued beads.

I hated it. I couldn't take the torture though of going through my closet again. A long bubble bath would do the trick. Walmart bath beads, here I come. Then I would be off to dream land. I had finally gotten comfy under the bubbles. For some reason I got a flash of that smirked face of Mr. Matt Bonner. My nether regions aches a little. Nope, don't go there girlfriend.

"You don't gotta go to work, work, work..." That was my current ringtone. Thinking of the devil. Why is Matt Bonner calling me at 9pm? I had forgotten I added his contact info earlier and subsequently butt dialed him. Of course, I had immediately hung up, leaving no voicemail.

"Ms. Thomas, I see I have a missed call from you. Just returning your call. For what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Well, you see I went to add your contact info earlier and quite honestly I must have butt dialed you not too long afterwards."

"You don't have to make up elaborate excuses to call me."

"That's not elaborate."

"I'm going to have to warn you though that this needs to be work related. So, yes you can borrow the stapler from my desk. No, you can't come in later than 7."

"I don't need or want your stapler," I insisted.

"I expect a kale salad for lunch tomorrow."

"Okay, random, but thanks for the heads up."

"It's always good to be prepared. You've had a few incidents lately that didn't go as planned. Didn't think you would have a salad lying around in that excessive bag of yours. Oh, and one more thing...who's your celebrity crush?"

"What?!"

"You heard me."

"Why is that of any importance?"

"I want to make sure that my selection of suits doesn't distract you."

"You are so odd. I'm not sure this HR approved."

"Well, don't answer answer if you don't feel comfortable."

"David Beckham," I blurt out. I'm clearly aware that in a way Matt Bonner does resemble him.

"Oh? Mine is a young Amy Adams with a few more curves." The rest of his response is cut off by the sound of a woman's voice asking if he was going back to bed.

"Hey, I'll see you in the morning. Good night, Ms. Thomas."

Click. Silence. Gross. Time to calm myself down before bed.