XXIX

Forget us

☆彡𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑎

Narrative

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

Summer had finally come. My junior year of college was officially over and I have one more year left. Tears of joy are very much present. I leave tomorrow for New York where I will be till August. I am sitting on Maya's bed scrolling through TikTok as she packs her bag for the summer. Her roommate had already left so it was just me and her in silence. "Are you sure you can't come back here once during the summer?" She cut through the silence. Luckily Cameron had to come back for physical therapy stuff which meant I didn't have to check on the apartment. "No, I wish I could but after this year I deserve a break from Connecticut." She chuckles and continues to roll up her clothes. "Don't worry I wont forget about you." "Yeah? You better not." She walks over to me. "Before you go, I need to tell you something." "Okay, shoot." I throw my phone to the side and look up. The silence is deafening. "I..." She starts. "You?-" Her lips are then on mine, her hands holding my face. I pull away. "I'm so sorry." She says backing away and rubbing her forehead. I can't believe I let this go on for so long. "No I'm sorry, I think I've been giving you the wrong impression." She doesn't speak so I continue, "I really like you Maya, but not in that way. You are such a wonderful person and maybe someday, but I'm just not ready for a relationship right now." "No, I'm sorry. I should've seen it." Her voice is low. "I should probably go." "Yeah. " Without another word, I leave and don't look back.

✰✰✰

After three weeks of being in New York, she never spoke to me again. I tried to reach out but I had now fucked up another relationship. I try my best not to think about her and focus on the friends who I never see. Matteo was starting to drive and every time I'm in the car with him I think I might die. This boy thinks it's so funny to look away from the road. Gabi is getting way too old. She rarely likes to play with her toys and I'm the one who has to ask. Me a college student. My parents are still the same, in love and invested in my love life. Unfortunately for them, I don't have one. Cam comes by every so often and we either end up at my house or either hers, Amaia's, or Ruth's. When Cam comes back from Connecticut she always fills me in on what's going on with the team, it's not like I need to know but I want to. I think summer was the right thing for us. We aren't as weird anymore I'm pretty sure I have my best friend back. Maybe she pushed away from me because of Maya. I'll figure that out eventually. Nine more weeks till I'm back for my senior year. The craziest part is I don't even know what I want to do after college, maybe I travel the world or move back home and figure out how to get a job I enjoy.

✰✰✰

"No, you're not doing it right!" Ruth yells at Cam as she pours vanilla into the dry bowl. "Okay, well if I'm not doing it right then tell me how!" Me and Amaia sit back and laugh as we stir the frosting. Our goal is to make a cake and at this point, it might not happen. "Maybe we should switch jobs," I propose. "It's okay, I am a pro at making cakes. I just need someone to follow my instructions." Ruth looks at Cam as she adds sugar to a bowl. We finish the frosting and start to clean up. Somehow I got powdered sugar in my hair, on my face, and my clothes.

"shit, how long has the cake been in for?" I look up from the cards over to the oven. Ruth jumps up to the oven in a second. "Good call Eve." "Let's ice this baby!" Cam throws down her Uno cards. "We have to wait for it to cool down or the icing will never stick." she sighs picking her cards back up. "Whose turn?"

"Guys...the cakes not coming out." We all gather around Ruth. "Did we forget to butter the pan?" Amaia asks. We look at each other and burst into laughter. "How the hell do we forget to butter it?" Ruth is now knifing the pieces out and trying her best to stick them together. "As long as it's cooked I'll eat it," I say grabbing the frosting out of the fridge.

✰✰✰

The summer came and was over before I knew it. Driving back to Connecticut was sort of bittersweet. It always is, but this time instead of being sad about my family I'm sad about school. Shocking I know. but over the years I've grown to like Uconn, my family there might not be as big as it used to be, but I love our apartment and maybe just college. I tried my best over the summer to not think about her and how we've become. It's stupid we can't be friends we weren't even together for that long. I may not be ready for her to come back to my life completely but I can at least look her way without It feeling wrong.

"Home sweet home!" Cam pushing through our heavy door and throwing her arms up. "Keep going I still have to get inside," I haul my two large suitcases through the kitchen. The same as we left it clean and cozy. I'm glad Cam was so set on making it clean before we left. When I get to my room I drop onto my bed. I should probably start to unpack but my bed is way better.

"Happy to be back?" Cam pushes my bags further into my room. "Yes and no." "Same, This year is going to be tough between exams and I'm no longer training I'm becoming an actual PT for the team." "How come you didn't tell me this before? I'm so proud of you!" "Thanks and I honestly forgot." We both laugh. "The team is back from Croatia. Want to go hang out?" "Today?" "No, not today we just got back. Plus, I know you. Whenever we travel back here you need a moment to 'regenerate.'" "It's true! I swear Connecticut does something to me." "Okay, whatever you say now unpack so you're not stuck doing it right before school starts." She leaves my room turning on the light. Now I have to get up.

✰✰✰

A couple more days went by meaning me and Cam were ready for school. We unpacked, cleaned the house again, and stocked up on groceries. Tonight is the night we are going over to the team's. I already prepared myself for how chaotic it would be between everyone talking about what they did and their time in Croatia. I'm glad we are doing this, I miss them and I am also very interested in what Croatia was like. One of the places that was on my bucket list to travel to before I wound up doing four years of college. Since it's still hot inside I put on some jorts with a baby tee. Summer had its time and I'm ready for fall clothing.

I jump into the driver's seat and wait for Cam to stop looking at her phone and get in. She had met some guy over the summer and hadn't stopped texting him once. I roll down the windows, "Cam if you don't get your ass in this car now I'm leaving you." "Okay, okay I'm in." She buckles herself in going right back to her phone. "Can you at least put something on before you go back to texting?" She connects her phone and puts on a random song from our shared playlist. "Okay I'm worried, are you going to stay stuck to that phone for the rest of your life? Am I getting replaced by a man?" I joke and she laughs. "Sorry, sorry, I'll tell him I have to go." "Let me say thank you for giving my best friend back for the evening." "Yeah yeah." She puts her phone down. For the rest of the short car ride, we talk about what the team will be like and guess what their reactions will be to Cam's news.

Their place is almost the same as when I was last here except the living room is filled with Nike shoe boxes. "What's with all the boxes?" I ask Ice. "It's mostly stuff for Paige, you know with all her brand deals." "Oh okay." I smile to myself thinking of Paige's reaction to all this when her room is not big enough to fit them. Speaking of Paige she was nowhere to be seen. "Where is Paige anyways?" I shocked myself with my words, and I think I surprised Ice too. "I think in her room, I'll tell her to come out since you guys are here." She leaves my side so I find my way to whoever is by me. I slide next to Aubrey grabbing a piece of the snack she's eating. Frozen fruit covered in chocolate, yum. "Hey Eve, How are you?" "I'm good, how are you? Oh! and how's your girlfriend?" "I'm good she's good, I'm glad you're back I missed my dancing buddy." She's making fun of me. "Oh my god, I promise you I'm working on not being as stiff, TikTok dances are hard." I grab another fruit and she laughs.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see her.

She looked the same as she did, maybe a little tanner but it's still her. With smile on her face as she looks at her phone. When she looks up she sees Cam first saying hi then her eyes meet mine. I smile and wave to her. She smiles back for a second and looks away. Oh. I guess I'm the only one who got over it. "Okay, I'm ready to hear about Croatia and Cam has some news!" I announce getting them all to turn their attention to me and then to Cam.

Almost two hours had gone by and they all now know about Cam and her man or whatever, and I have heard almost everyone's story about Croatia. Let's just say it's been moved higher up on the bucket list. We are all in random groups talking about something different. You would think we would run out of stuff but there is always something to talk about with them. I listen as Ice and KK argue over something and then I hear it. Her name.

I didn't think they were still together.

Why am I so worked up? I shouldn't be upset. But despite my resistance, my ears start to get hot and I feel the tears build. I worked so hard why am I so upset? Just shut up shut up. I try to tell myself. "I'll be right back," I tell the two in front of me before leaving. It's raining, just my luck. I need to get to the car. The rain is heavy and cold. I can feel my jeans starting to weigh from the water. "Evelina!" I hear my name from behind me. I turn and it's Paige running up to me, I cringe seeing her wear slides and letting her socks get soaked. "Paige?" it's hard to see her eyes through all this rain. "Where are you going?" She is now in front of me. "To my car, why are you out here?" She looks down at the floor. If anything looking at her not responding to me makes me even more upset. Here she is standing in front of me knowing she is dating the girl she cheated on me with. I can't help but vomit my words out of my mouth. In this pour, I do not have the energy or restraint to deliver my words mildly. "Paige, I know what's going on and I'm done. I'm happy for you, so go be with her. I don't care, but don't come chasing after me. Just forget what we had, don't let it hold you back. Forget me."

She looks from the ground, her Nike tech is soaked along with her ponytail. "Evelina." Hearing her say my name again makes my heart twist. "Evelina, forgetting you is like forgetting how to breathe."

"I don't understand how you won't let me tell you the whole thing," she chuckles. "At the party I didn't mean for it to end like it did, I didn't mean to kiss her, I wanted to kiss you. She practically threw herself on me and now I've spent all these months wishing I could go back in time to when I was yours." I can't tell if I'm crying because the rain is too heavy. "Then why did you continue to hang out with her after the event? You were in her car, Paige." "I was only in her car because she wanted to apologize. I only got in her car because it was raining and I had practice right after. Whatever she said I did isn't true. I only thought of you and you only. I hoped she could help me get you back. but that didn't work. The only reason I said her name back there was because Nika had asked me what her name was. She means nothing to me, you mean everything." I try my best to choke back my tears but it doesn't work. Cam was right I was too selfish and stubborn, and my stupid pride got in the way.

"I'm sorry I didn't hear you out. I...I was just so hurt and upset-" "I understand." "I feel terrible." I can't look into her eyes so I look away. "Evelina, I understand." Her words draw my eyes back up. She is crying too. "I'm so sorry. I know you are with that other girl but I just needed to get his out." "I'm not with anyone, Paige." I take her face in my hands and kiss her. She kisses me back and I melt in her arms. I tried to get over her but I couldn't.

When we both pull away I realize just how soaked we both were and laugh. "What are we supposed to tell the team?" She chuckles and places her forehead on mine.

My heart is so full of her, I can hardly call it my own.