Chapter 24. Safe

🎶 Haan Tum Ho

Published on 13.07.2022

| AUTHOR'S POV |

"Bhai," Ayansh calls out while coming downstairs as his brother just picks up his bag to leave for work.

Rahul shoots him a look to continue.

"I'll- I'll be a little late to office today." He mumbles, forcing a polite smile to hide his anxiousness.

"That's alright." Rahul says casually. "But may I know why?"

"I've to meet Dhruv. Uh- it's important." He lies, wishing his brother doesn't push him further. They've been on pretty good terms off late.

Rahul looks at him with scrutinizing gaze before settling on a small nod. "No worries." He shrugs and turns to walk towards the door.

Ayansh raises his hand to wave at him but ends up waving at his back.

If there's a quality that would define Ayansh, it's indecisiveness. If there's something that Ayansh hates about himself the most, it's indecisiveness. He has nothing figured out, no clarity on what he actually wants. He doesn't want to raise his brother's hopes more than he has already done and he also doesn't want to distance himself from Inaaya. If there's one thing he's sure of then it's the fact that he likes to be with her and he isn't in the mood to deprive himself of something that makes him the happiest. She doesn't make him doubt himself, she gives him enough space and confidence to be himself, his real self. She makes him smile, makes him laugh and there's something about the way she changes the whole vibe of the place solely by her presence. She's like the diary that doesn't judge you, the water that accepts you the way you're, the sun that gives away its light to let the moon shine every evening.

"Hey boy! I see you're waiting for me." Inaaya grins when she reaches the restaurant and approaches Ayansh who was standing outside, his attention on his phone.

Ayansh lifts his gaze and takes in her appearance. A rose pink colour crop top, paired with black palazzo and a sling bag hanging on her shoulder. Her hair was left open and she looked as bright as the sun and the intensity of his gaze made her burn.

"Hope you'd 'good' dreams." He says, when he meets her eyes, emphasizing on the word "good" intentionally.

Inaaya bites the inside of her cheek to contain her smile.

"You look 'good' too." He adds and turns his head around, "the restaurant seems 'good' too. I hope the food is 'good' as well."

"Okay, that's enough." Inaaya stops him as a laugh escapes her despite her resistance. "Stop with your obsession and let's go inside. I don't have the whole day."

Ayansh opens the door for her before she could reach for the handle.

"Look at this boy being a gentleman." She comments cheekily.

"Don't make me slam the door on your face, Inaaya."

Ayansh follows her as she laughs.

They take a seat at the end corner. There weren't much people since it was still morning.

"I'll pay the money." Inaaya tells in advance while taking her seat.

"I don't say no to free food ever." Ayansh sits opposite her.

Inaaya's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. "Really? When did this happen?"

"Just now." He gives her a lazy smirk.

"You look extra merry today." Inaaya folds her hands on the table, leans forward and whispers, "tum itna jo muskura rahe ho, kya gham hai jo chupa rahe ho?" (how is it so that you are smiling so much, what is the sorrow that you are hiding.)

Ayansh looks at her bemused and then a small laughs vibrates through him making her smile too.

"Koi gham nahi hai. (There's no sadness)" He leans forward and says. "Just decided this moment, haso, jeeyo, muskurao. Kya pata kal ho na ho." (Laugh, live, smile. Who knows if there will be a tomorrow or not)

Inaaya narrows her eyes. "You did not just pull a KHNH and deem it as your decision." She shakes her head.

Ayansh shrugs casually.

Before Inaaya could continue, the waiter comes to take their orders. He clears his throat to attract their attention and looks at them with a partly curious and partly weirded out gaze.

Ayansh straightens up immediately, feeling slightly embarassed and a hell lot self-conscious. He feels relieved when Inaaya places the order and he doesn't have to say anything. She orders hosomaki and chicken tempura rolls.

"Okay, okay, let's continue." Inaaya says as soon the waiter leaves. "I was really enjoying it."

Ayansh thinks of something for a moment. "Kisi ki muskurahaton pe ho nisar, kisi ka dard mil sake to le udhaar, kisi ke waaste ho tere dil mein pyaar, jeena isi ka naam hai. (Offer yourself to bring a smile to someone, share a shoulder to bear someone's pain, have love for someone in your heart, this is the name of life)."

Inaaya raises an impressed eyebrow. "I like the song." She smiles. "But you're a terrible singer," she adds playfully and continues, "Ajeeb daastaan hai ye, kahaan shuru kahaan khatam, ye mnzile hain kaunsi, na wo samajh sake na hum. (What a strange story this is, who knows where it started and where will it end, what destinations are these, neither he nor I could understand that)."

"Well, if you don't like my singing, I'll sing more just to annoy you." He waggles his eyebrows in victory and she rolls her eyes. "My turn. Lag ja gale ki phir ye haseen raat ho na ho, shayad phir is janam main mulakat ho na ho. (Embrace me, dear, who knows whether or not this beautiful night will ever come again, in this life, we may or may never meet again)."

When Inaaya leans forward this time, there's a mischievous glint in her eyes. "If I didn't know you any better, then I would think you're flirting with me, Mr Mehra." She lowers her voice.

If Ayansh feels amused, he doesn't let it show on his face. Instead, he leans too, not leaving her challenging gaze even for a while, pinning her with his deep ones and whispers in his husky voice, "If I didn't know you any better, then I would think we're on a date, Miss Rai."

And just like that, the playfulness of the situation is replaced by something else. The nearly empty place feels too crowded that it becomes difficult for her to keep her breathing steady. It isn't a date. She knows, he knows too but right now, she couldn't help but doubt it.

"Aren't you getting too comfortable with me?" She forces herself to speak, desperately wanting to take the control in her hands.

"You've given me too much leeway, I fear." He whispers with wide eyes looking at her adorably.

Luckily, Inaaya sees the waiter coming towards them with the corners of her eyes and moves back, straightening herself. Ayansh follows her lead. He serves them with the delicious food and leaves when both thank him with a smile.

"Uhm- should we pray before we start eating?" Ayansh asks hesitantly making her frown in confusion. "The NGO?"

Her eyes gleam in realisation. "Oh. We don't actually pray at my house but if you want we can here." She smiles.

"I actually liked that little ritual with those kids." He admits and that makes her heart warm. "Should we?"

"Why not?" She joins her palms and closes her eyes and he does the same.

"The food's good." Ayansh comments after taking a bite.

Inaaya scoffs. "Stop with this good thing. Or else I'll make sure you pay for it." She warns.

He looks at her with mild surprise and scrutinizing gaze. "This time, it wasn't intentional, I swear."

She looks at him petulantly, feeling guilty for her misjudgement. "Okay," she pouts. "I'm sorry."

He doesn't respond. He simply smiles and shakes his head lightly. But the way he averts his gaze back to the food, so slow, so tantalizing that it makes her heart skip a beat and captivates her entire attention. She stares at him unblinkingly as he relishes another bite. Before he could notice her staring him, she turns to her plate.

It's a foreign feeling. It's like walking into a new city and not wanting to leave, trying a new flavour of icecream and it instantly becomes your favourite but most of all, it feels like taking a leap of faith and the next thing you know is that's the best thing you've ever done. And god help her because she couldn't stop but crave more for this feeling which makes her lightheaded and giddy.

Inaaya sneakily steals a look of him. She likes how with time he has become so comfortable around her that she's witnessing the side of him she never thought even existed. From being a nervous wreck around her to letting her know his childish antics, challenging and teasing her and maybe even subtly flirting with her, she liked it, enjoyed it. He was sweet and nice and made her smile and he felt safe, like home. She once again tries to look at him and he chooses the exact moment to steal a glance, his eyes going wide when it meets her and she chokes on the morsel of food in her mouth.

Ayansh quickly picks up the glass of water and comes to her side. "Here," he offers the glass as she's coughing wildly, bending to her level and rubbing her back frantically.

Inaaya nods at him, assuring that she's fine when she feels herself okay. She takes the tissue and dabs at her mouth while he goes back to his seat. They both look at each other silently, with no emotions on their face and after a few seconds, they burst out laughing.

"You seem really disoriented today. Are you okay?" Ayansh questions skittishly.

"I blame your blanket dance for it!" She shrieks which earns another laugh from him.

After a while, the waiter comes to collect their dishes and brings them the bill.

"Should I pay?"

Inaaya shuts him up with a glare and gives her card to the waiter. Ayansh taps on her hand to get her attention.

"What?" She mouths.

He didn't notice earlier because he was busy focussing on Inaaya but now he sees a familiar face behind her, on the other corner. "Is that Nikita?"

Inaaya follows his gaze, turning her head around and her eyes narrow when she sees her friend with some unfamiliar guy. "What's she doing here?"

The waiter gives her card back and she thanks him for his service.

"Should we wait?" Inaaya asks Ayansh.

"I guess, we should." He says, his eyes fixed on the two.

The guy leaves after a few minutes but Nikita stays seated on her place, her elbows propped and face buried in her palms. She's startled when Inaaya places a hand on her shoulder and her head jerk behind. When she sees Inaaya, her shoulders slump and her expression softens into relief.

"What happened? Who was that guy?"

"Inu- In- ," her voice cracks and she turns away. "Not here. Let's- let's go outside."

They exit the restaurant through the back door to get some privacy. As soon as they reach the back where there's no one except the three of them, Nikita throws herself upon Inaaya and hugs her.

"Niki?" Inaaya calls out in concern, her worried gaze meeting with equally tense gaze of Ayansh beside her.

Nikita hugs her even tighter as if her life depended on her. Tears streaming through her eyes and sobs raking through her body. "I can't marry. I don't want to marry. I don't want to Inaaya, I don't want to." She begs and cries and her pleas scare Inaaya.

"You won't." She tries to keep her voice soft and reassuring. "You won't, I promise." She repeats, pulling herself away from her and gently holding her face in her hands. "Shh, stop crying- "

Nikita shakes her head. "I can't do this." She whimpers and the vulnerability breaks Inaaya's heart, a flash of her own self reflecting in front of her eyes. "I can't marry him. Jay. I just can't," a painful sob escapes her and Inaaya hugs her friend again. "I'm- I'm not that strong. I can't- I can't do this."

"What did he say?" Inaaya questions her gently, her hand holding her head.

Nikita moves away, rubbing her eyes and face with the back of her hand, gasping for air as she tries not to cry more. Ayansh gives her his handkerchief and she takes it without wasting a second.

"Sacrificing dreams was one thing but- but he has expectations," Nikita looks up at Inaaya as another tear rolls down, "Expectations which I can't- I can't."

"You won't." Inaaya says in a soft yet firm voice, swiping her thumb over her cheek. "You won't do anything that you don't want to do. You won't."

"I won't. I can't." She sniffles. "He doesn't want a wife." She looks at Inaaya and Ayansh with horror. "He wants a robot, something that'll- that'll work on his will. When his parents said that he wanted to meet me, I thought maybe I could ask him if I can study fur- further and maybe he'll understand. I came here with a hope." Her eyes glazes with fresh tears and Inaaya grabs hold of her left arm, rubbing it for comfort. "But whatever he said, I- I can't even think of that in my worst nightmare. He hates the fact that I'll be a graduate and hold a degree. He made me feel humiliated just because I aspire to do something as basic as study. He- said," she let's out a bitter laugh, "he thinks I'm extremely attractive and mahn I've never felt more grossed out in my entire life." Frustration and helplessness seeps through her tone. "He wants me to stay indoors because he doesn't want men to stare at me with wrong intentions. As if that's fucking my problem!" She screeches.

"I'm so sorry." Inaaya whispers.

Nikita shakes her head. "There's worse. Basically he wants a trophy wife; someone who'll look pretty and act pretty and follow him like a dog tied with a leash. I'm not allowed to go out or hang out with my friends unless they come at our place and spend time but but but- , she smiles scornfully, "he wants me to meet his friends, attend parties with him, behave like his polite wife with his business associates. He wants me to serve his parents which was the only not ridiculous thing he said. And then- " her voice sounds defeated and she leans back on the wall, taking a deep breath. "I- ," she feels too disgusted to even say it. She bends her head low. "He said he's a man," she adds in a small voice. "He's a man and he- he has needs. And I being his wife will have to fulfill them. It's- it's my duty."

Inaaya's blood runs cold and she stands their frozen, understanding the implications behind his words. Ayansh feels too ashamed and disgusted that he can't just stare helplessly and looks away from Nikita.

"It's like my body, his choice." Her voice croaks as her chest squeezes in pain and she starts weeping silently. When she looks up, she finds it's not just her who has tears but her friend as well.

Nikita takes a step towards Inaaya. "I can't do this," she mouths, pulling her bottom lip and Inaaya instantly embraces her.

"You won't." She murmurs against her hair. "Tell- tell your parents you can't marry and if they don't agree then run away but you aren't marrying that guy." She pulls away and looks at her with determination, clenching her jaw to contain the sob that threatens to spill out.

Nikita shakes her head furiously. "I don't care. I don't care how anyone feels. I'm not marrying. I'm not going to sacrifice myself to this patriarchal society. I just- won't be able to do it." She stares helplessly.

"And you don't need to do it." Inaaya whispers softly. "It's wrong. He's wrong. The people who give the men so much power are wrong. Not you." She holds both her hands in hers. "You don't deserve to live a life this. Nobody does. No women does. And I'm sure your parents will understand. They love you."

Nikita sniffs. "I'll- I'll talk to them. I'll make them understand." She nods, assuring herself.

"You'll, I'm sure."

She gives a small smile of gratitude, of hope, of strength. "I'll just come from the washroom." She tells Inaaya, needing a moment with herself.

Inaaya leaves her hands and stares as she walks back into the restaurant. Ayansh comes near her.

"Inaaya." He notices how stunned and disturbed she looks. When she doesn't respond, he grabs her elbow and makes her face him. "Are you okay?"

She looks at him for a moment. "She's okay- she's okay, right? She's- she's safe, right? She's- "

"Inaaya," he cuts her off, his voice going an octave higher. "Are. You okay?" He repeats, emphasizing more.

And finally a sob breaks through her, hot tears breaking the barrier and flowing through her eyes.

"Yaar," Ayansh gently pulls her and cocoons her in his arms as she weeps quietly. She looked so broken, so defeated, so lost that it felt as if someone just stabbed his heart with a knife. He never knew he could feel such excruciating pain just by looking at someone else in pain. "She's fine. She'll be fine." He whispers, referring to Nikita and tenderly moves a soothing hand over her back.

"She'll be safe, right? She won't suffer. She won't have to surrender. She- " the words die in her throat as she chokes on her sobs.

Ayansh pulls her even closer if that was possible. His one arm secures itself around her waist and another one gently strokes her hair. "Shh, don't worry. Nothing wrong is going to happen with Nikita. She's completely safe and she's not marrying an asshole."

The last word makes her chuckle through her tears as she clutches his shirt even more firmly, not wanting to leave the safety she felt whilst being engulfed by him. She listens to his heartbeats, soft gasps still leaving her lips as she tries to regain her composure. Ayansh doesn't let his hold on her loosen. He's scared that she might just stumble if he leaves her. She looked so vulnerable and the tremble in her voice makes him want to take away all her fears. He softly kisses the crown of her head and the small gesture of care and kindness makes her sigh and is like a soothing caress over her aching soul. Reluctantly, she breaks the hug and pushes herself away from the heat of his body. She doesn't meet his eyes but Ayansh takes her by surprise when his hands lift to cradle her face in his palms.

The way he's handling her just seems so intimate and she feels exposed at his mercy.

"Are you okay?" He looks at her with anguish, his thumb brushing over her cheeks slowly in a repeated manner.

Inaaya gives him a little nod which makes his lips part in relief. "I'm fine," she murmurs but she isn't sure if her voice was even audible so she smiles at him and when he smiles back, she knows it's fine. It's okay. She's okay.

She doesn't say another word and just let's herself bask in all the affection and attention he was showering as he brushes away the strands of hair stuck to her forehead, tucks a lock of hair behind her ear while she stares at him, wondering what did she do to deserve such softness after feeling nothing but torment and agony all these years. She stared at him, questioning if it's a dream and if it is a dream, she wants to stare at it for as long as possible.

Ayansh and Inaaya didn't notice when Nikita came. Maybe she came just right now or maybe a few moments early but it didn't matter.

"I'll return you the handkerchief after washing." Nikita says to Ayansh.

"No need." Ayansh exhales. "You can keep it or throw it whatever." He shrugs.

"Or I can give it to Inaaya and she can return it or keep it or whatever." She gazes at Inaaya through the corner of her eyes.

Inaaya doesn't give her any reaction. So much happened today that she still feels overwhelmed. "I'll drop you home." She offers.

"Okay."

The three of them walk towards the front to the parking lot.

Inaaya hands Nikita the keys. "Get in the car, I'll be back in a moment."

After Nikita leaves, Inaaya looks at Ayansh with puffy eyes. "It's a one night stand song."

His eyebrows bunch up together. "What?"

"Lag jaa gale is a one-night stand song." Her voice comes out a little throaty due to the whole crying. "That's why I said you're flirting with me." She enlightens him.

"It's not." He let's out a nervous, doubtful chuckle.

"It is." She says with confidence. "Go home and listen to the lyrics carefully."

The lyrics start running through his head and he immediately shakes his head in horror. "No."

"Yes." She nods. "hum ko mili hai aaj ye ghadiya naseeb se, je bhar ke dekh leejiye humko kareeb se." (I have been given today, this time, by destiny. To your hearts content see me closely.) She sings.

"You're tainting my childhood." He gasps in disbelief.

"Flattered to know that." She grins goofily.

He didn't know if the new information he gathered through her was true or not. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was just a silly joke where people misconstruct according to their own benefits but he would happily believe such thousands of misconstructions if that meant he would be able to see her radiant smile.

"By the way, I'm sorry about your shirt." She grimaces, looking at the creases and wet patches on the front due to her sobbing that has made his otherwise ironed shirt look disheveled.

Ayansh looks down. "It's alright. I, anyways, keep spare shirts and blazers so if I want I can change it."

"On other note," the change in her tone makes his head snap up.

"No- "

"You look like you'd your lag jaa gale moment." She teases and he squeezes his eyes shut in annoyance. "What if your colleagues misunderstand something?" The playful rise of her eyebrows adds to his irritation.

"How does one go from making someone console them to making that same someone get mad at them in a span of few minutes?" He stares at her with incredulity.

She giggles shamelessly. "It's a special talent. Also- "

"I'm not doing this anymore. I'm out." He shakes his head in terror and raises his hand in surrender and walks towards his car.

Inaaya laughs at his retreating figure.

***

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