Chapter 3

MASON

Tayla and Gemma scream at me and pull on my shoulders, but they can’t budge me. I have a strong grip on my mother’s shoulders and could hurt her really badly if I wanted to.

Right now, I feel like I really want to.

My mom, too drunk to be scared, grins up at me like a madwoman.

“Do it,” she says. “Hit me. Do the only thing you’re good at.”

“Mason, just go!” Gemma yells.

“Don’t let her get to you!” Tayla adds.

I look back and forth between them. The fear on their faces pulls me out of the depths of my rage. I don’t want them to be afraid of me, to look at me like they look at our mother.

I let her go and step back.

“I knew you were too chickenshit to actually do anything,” Mom says, trying to act tough. But she’s shaking like a Chihuahua as she bends to pick up the fallen cigarette and then lights it.

“I’ll call you tomorrow,” I tell the girls before getting into my car and driving away.

“Fuck!” I yell and punch the steering wheel. I really don’t want to leave Tayla and Gemma with her. I wish I could just take them with me now.

I’ve seen how vicious that woman can be. She will pick out every single little insecurity you have and tear you down piece by piece.

In all honesty, I don’t know why she even had kids. She doesn’t have a single maternal bone in her body. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear her body was made out of Bacardi and Coke.

I take a deep breath and count to ten, trying to calm myself down.

I’ve got to stay focused. I need to do well in college and go pro. This is the only way I can get my sisters away from her. Lily and I are going to build our dream life together and take Gemma and Tayla with us.

LILY

I can’t believe I’m leaving home today, and I’m officially a college freshman!

My dad helps carry my bags out front. We sit on the stoop, waiting for Mason to get here.

“You sure you don’t want me to drive you?” he asks, his voice soft. I can tell he’s fighting to hold back the tears.

I smile and shake my head. “Thanks, Dad, but you don’t need to do all that driving. Mason and I are excited to get there together.”

He nods. “Right. Of course.”

My dad puts his arm around my shoulders and gives me a squeeze. I lean into him, comforted by his quiet support.

He clears his throat and looks at me with watery eyes. “You know, it feels like just yesterday I was running beside you, holding the back of your bike, hoping you wouldn’t fall. You had those little pigtails and scraped knees. And you were so determined to do it on your own. And now here you are, heading off to college. It’s amazing, Lily. Watching you grow up into this strong, kind, determined young woman… It’s been the greatest thing in my life. I’m so proud of you.”

“You’re so corny,” I tease, nudging him gently before wrapping my arms around him. “But I love you for it.”

He chuckles, wiping his eyes quickly. There’s a pause before he speaks again. “I’m sorry your mom couldn’t be here for the send-off.”

I glance at him, my smile fading. “I’m glad she’s not. This day would’ve been all about her drama, not about me.”

He gives me a small, sad laugh. “Yeah, that’s true. But, still, I’m sorry she… those things…” He can’t finish the thought.

I don’t know what the hell to say either, so thank God we hear honking from down the street—Mason’s here. He’s practically hanging out the window as he pulls up, yelling, “College, here we come!”

Dad and I laugh, then he gives me a last squeeze, and we stand up. As Mason steps out of the car, Dad pulls him aside for a moment.

“Mason,” he says, serious now, “I know you two are excited and ready for this next step, but I’m trusting you to look out for her.”

Mason nods immediately. “I will, sir. I promise. I’ll take care of her.”

Dad gives him a firm pat on the shoulder. “I know you will.”

I watch them with a smile, my heart full. However, I can’t let this seriousness last forever. I clap my hands and shake my head with a grin. “Okay, okay, bro-lovefest over. Time to hit the road!”

Dad laughs and steps back. The three of us load all the bags into the trunk, and then Mason opens the car door for me.

The wind rushes through the windows as we pull away from the curb. My childhood street disappears behind us. I glance at Mason, who’s already grinning like a little kid, and feel my heart flutter. We’re driving off into a brand-new future together, and for the first time in a long time, everything feels fun, exciting, and wide open.

***

Walking into my dorm room, I feel relieved when I see my roommate hasn’t arrived yet.

“First pick, what side do you want?” Mason smiles as he looks around the room.

I look around at the basic and small room. It seems like both sides are identical.

“Right side.” I nod at the bed before dumping the two bags I’m holding onto it. Mason follows suit with the three he’s clutching.

We make another trip before all my stuff is inside.

“Jesus, what the hell is in this bag?” Mason grunts as he drops it onto my bed.

“Textbooks and school stuff,” I reply as I place my hands on my hips and take in all the unpacking I’m going to have to do.

“You got textbooks?” Mason asks, making me spin around to face him.

“Did you not?” I gasp, wondering how he’s going to pass college if he didn’t get any books.

“I’m just kidding, Princess.” He laughs, pulling me into his arms.

I automatically wrap my arms around his waist as he kisses the top of my head.

“Ugh, break it up,” an unfamiliar voice spits out, pulling us apart.

Standing in the doorway is a red-haired girl with her arms folded across her chest. She’s wearing what looks like designer clothes—something I always pictured my bestie, Brittany, would’ve worn outside her uniforms. Which I was wrong about, by the way.

“Hi, I’m Lily. You must be my roommate.” I smile, stepping forward and holding my hand out to her.

But she doesn’t say anything, just looks me up and down, clearly not impressed with what she sees. I stand there awkwardly, holding my hand out like an idiot—only dropping it when Mason clears his throat.

I take a step back to stand next to him, already regretting moving into the dorms and not with him. How am I going to last a whole year with a roommate that hates me already?

I share a look with him, knowing he’s thinking about how strange this girl is too.

“Sophia, my darling. Please move so we can bring your stuff in,” a woman’s voice says calmly and sweetly from behind her.

She rolls her eyes and steps to the side, revealing a middle-aged woman and man pushing a trolley full of suitcases, handbags, and shoeboxes.

“A trolley would’ve been handy,” I mutter to Mason, who hums in agreement.

As Sophia’s parents walk in, they both look me and Mason up and down, just like their daughter did, very unimpressed. Neither says a word as they head to the opposite side of the room.

“Friendly bunch,” Mason mutters to me as we turn to my pile of stuff that hasn’t magically unpacked itself.

“You don’t have to stay and help,” I tell him as he grabs the bag with the textbooks and heads for the flimsy-looking desk.

“Princess, you literally helped me and Liam unpack a whole house. It’s the least I could do,” he reassures me before frowning slightly and adding, “Actually, he should be helping us too.”

“He can buy us dinner,” I say with a laugh, grabbing a bag to start unpacking.

It takes us thirty minutes to unpack everything and another fifteen of me wanting to rearrange everything three times before I’m officially moved into my dorm.

“Thank you for helping me,” I say, smiling up at Mason as I snuggle into his side.

“Any time, Princess,” he replies before kissing the top of my head again.

The whole time we’ve been unpacking, Sophia and her mother have stood next to each other, barking orders at her dad, who has been doing everything. I actually started to feel a bit sorry for him.

“Do you think Brittany’s done?” Mason asks.

Brittany and her mom were driving up today to move her into her dorm. As soon as I told her I was moving into the dorms, she decided she was going to as well, much to Liam’s annoyance.

I pulled my phone out of my back pocket and saw multiple texts from her.

Brittany

Hey!!! I’m officially all done! Room 309

Brittany

Mom just left. God, that woman can cry

Brittany

Okay, maybe I cried a bit too.

Brittany

Let me know when you’re done xx

Brittany

Or if you want help xxx

I smiled as I read her texts.

“God, she’s clingy.” Mason snorted, earning him an elbow to the stomach from me.

“Don’t talk about my best friend like that,” I warned as I texted her back that we had just finished and gave her my room number.

“Who would’ve thought you two would be best friends?” Mason laughed as he fell onto my small single bed.

“Right? If you had told me that in my freshman year, Brittany Sanders would be my best friend and I’d be dating Mason Cooper, I would’ve laughed in your face and called you crazy.” I laughed as I sat next to him.

As the words left my mouth, I noticed that Sophia and her parents had fallen silent and were now staring at us.

“Mason Cooper? The quarterback?” her dad asked, his eyebrows raised so high that I thought if he had hair, they would’ve disappeared.

“Ahh, yeah,” Mason mumbled as he started shaking his leg. He hated the attention his football achievements brought.

“Wow, I saw you play during state finals. You’re really good,” he said. He nodded before going back to the suitcase he’d been unpacking.

“So, you two are dating?” Sophia asked, waving her finger between us.

Her mom looked Mason up and down in a way that made me want to rip her hair out and vomit at the same time. She had to be at least one hundred years old and was checking out my eighteen-year-old boyfriend.

Before either of us could answer, Brittany came bouncing through the door and jumped straight on top of us.

“Oh my god, I’ve missed you! Your room is so cute! I should move my desk by the window too!” she exclaimed all at once, squeezing our faces against hers.

“Hey, Britt,” Mason groaned, pushing her off him and onto me.

“I missed you too, Mason.” She rolled her eyes before breaking out with a huge smile. “I can’t believe we’re college students!” she squealed. “We can finally be on the same volleyball team, and by senior year, we could be co-captains!”

Sophia and her mother both snorted at Brittany, making all three of our heads snap to them.

“I’m going to be cheer captain,” Sophia stated matter-of-factly, lifting her head. She stuck her nose up in the air, like a stereotypical mean girl from the movies.

I couldn’t help myself; I burst into laughter, and Brittany followed suit.

“Don’t worry. You don’t have to compete with me,” I said once my laughter calmed.

Sophia turned bright red, probably with anger.

“Let’s go get a latte,” Sophia said as she stomped out of the room, her parents trailing obediently behind her.

We all shared ~what the hell was that?~ looks.

“You’ll be my volleyball partner, right?” Brittany asked, fluttering her eyelashes at me.

“As long as you promise to work on your spike,” I joked, making her feign hurt before laughing and bumping my shoulder against hers.

“Hey, I was state champion last year,” she retorted.

“You only won because I was in a coma,” I stated.

“I’ll take the wins any way I can get them,” she said with a shrug.

Mason grunted. “I did win a state championship too, you know.”

“But who has the most state championships?” I asked, looking between them both as they screwed their noses up playfully.

“How many do you have?” Brittany asked.

“Nine: three for cheer, three for track and field, and three for volleyball.” I smiled, thinking that if I hadn’t quit cheer or hadn’t had my accident, I most likely would’ve ended up with twelve.

“Overachiever much?” Brittany joked, sending us all into another fit of laughter.

I never thought I would be laughing about everything I missed out on due to the accident, but here I was.

***

Walking into my first college class, I’m filled with butterflies—a mix of nerves and excitement.

I don’t feel the same pressures I felt in high school. Perhaps it’s because my mom isn’t here telling me what I need to do or that I have to hold myself to a certain standard. I feel like I can just be myself.

It’s surprising how freeing it feels and how nice it is not to have her in my life. But every so often, I’m hit with a wave of missing her, and I feel awful. Why do I want someone who treats me like utter shit in my life?

I’ve got to stop thinking about her before I start freaking out.

I look around the room and decide to sit in the middle. Not many people are here yet. Maybe six. There’s a group of four girls sitting at the very back and two boys sitting on opposite ends of the front row, sending each other glares every now and then.

Slowly, more and more people fill the room. The professor walks in, dropping his satchel on the desk and sighing to himself before pulling out his laptop. He’s younger than I thought he’d be.

He looks like he’s around thirty years old and would rather be anywhere else right now.

“He looks happy, doesn’t he?” a boy says, slipping into the seat next to me.

“Sorry, what?” I shake my head as I take in the stranger sitting next to me. He reminds me of Mason, with his shaggy dark hair and boyish smile.

“Cameron,” he says, smiling and holding his hand out.

“Lily.” I nod, shaking his hand quickly. “So, business administration, huh? Looks like we’ve got a lot in common already.”

Cameron winks, making me physically cringe.

“Ooh, ouch. Not as smooth a line as I thought?” He laughs it off as he starts unpacking his laptop.

“I play football if that helps,” he says casually, leaning back in his seat.

“So does my boyfriend,” I say, smiling and thinking of the sweet texts Mason sent me this morning.

“Oh yeah? Who is he?” he asks, leaning forward, and I swear he glances at my chest.

“Mason Cooper,” I reply with a frown, adjusting my top, hoping I’m not showing too much cleavage.

“Ooh, the QB,” Cameron says, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. “Tough to date a QB. Bet you have to fight all the ladies off him.”

“What?” My frown deepens. Are girls throwing themselves at Mason, and I haven’t noticed? Why hasn’t he said anything?

“I mean, he’s the second-string quarterback in one of the best colleges. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was getting all the action.” He shrugs casually. “That’s why you want to date a lineman—we don’t get the attention, so we’re loyal.”

“Let me guess, you’re a lineman?” I say.

He laughs. “Guilty! But don’t worry. I get it. I’ll back off.” He winks again, making me wonder if he is really going to back off.

I actually enjoy my first class. Business administration sounds boring, but I like the idea of running a business and being my own boss. Maybe I’ll get a business degree.

I still haven’t chosen my major. It feels like such a big choice to make, like what I randomly choose now will determine the rest of my life.

Cameron keeps his word and doesn’t bother me for the rest of the class. But as I’m leaving, he falls into step with me.

“I didn’t mean to offend you earlier,” he states, actually sounding apologetic.

“I’m not offended,” I reply, “but I’m not interested. I actually do have a boyfriend.”

“I’ll be honest. I’m from out of state and have no friends, and you looked like you were the nicest person in the room. I struggle to meet new people.”

“So, you thought hitting on me and being an absolute douche was the way to make a friend?” I shake my head, amused but also slightly complimented.

“I know, I know,” he groans, throwing his head back. “I’ve watched too many movies. I promise I’m not a total bro.”

I press my lips together as I pretend to be deep in thought. “Hmm, I guess I can be your friend as long as you promise to never, ever flirt with me again,” I tell him, stopping outside a coffee shop.

Cameron smiles kindly down at me. “I promise to never, ever flirt with you again, Lily.”

“Fine, I’ll be your friend.”

I’m about to head into the coffee shop when I hear someone calling my name—Lily Bennett, not just Lily. I turn around and frown, wondering who would be calling out. I spot Liam running full speed across the quad toward me.

“Hey. How was your class?” he asks when he stops in front of me, not even out of breath.

“It was really good. How was yours?” I ask, nodding toward the coffee shop.

“Sucked.” He shrugs as he looks at Cameron suspiciously. Then he says, “What’s up, Cam?”

“Nothing,” Cameron replies. He nods at me and says, “See ya around, Lily.”

Liam glares at Cameron after he leaves.

“He looked pretty friendly with you,” Liam says.

“He’s from out of state and wanted a friend,” I explain.

“Just a friend?” he questions. “Right, sure.”

“You know I’m really cool, and lots of people want to be my friend. Besides, you two are on the same team; shouldn’t you be friends with him?”

My nostrils are instantly hit with the delicious smell of coffee.

“The team’s big. I don’t know everyone yet. Are you hungry?” Liam asks as he eyes the muffins in the cabinet.

“Starving.” I ponder a raspberry and white chocolate muffin.

“Good, I hate eating by myself,” he replies, surprising me. Liam is one of the most confident people I’ve met, so his not wanting to eat by himself is really shocking.

Guess college is intimidating for everyone.

Once we both have our coffees and muffins, we head back outside. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot the last person I expected to see at a college coffee shop—my mother. I knew she lived somewhat close to the school, but why would she be here?

My heart begins pounding against my chest. I try to take a deep breath to calm myself, but it doesn’t work.

~I’ve forgotten how to breathe!~

I start to break out in a cold sweat. What do I even say to Mom? Do I say hello and act normal? I’d love to tell her to get fucked, but I can’t say that to my mom. I’m too scared.

~Where’s Mason? He always makes me feel better.~

“You all right, Lily? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Liam laughs, somehow snapping me out of my breathing dilemma. It feels nice to breathe.

“I did,” I reply, turning my head to look at my mother.

I frown when I don’t see her. Instead, standing there is a blonde woman in an apron wiping a table down.

It wasn’t Mom.

The lady doesn’t even look that much like Mom. My head is messing with me.

Liam looks down at me with raised eyebrows.

“You saw a ghost?”

“Kind of. No. I thought I saw someone I knew…”

He chuckles and shakes his head.

“Brittany thinks she senses a ghost like twice a week—no wonder you two are friends.”

We go sit outside and enjoy the sunshine. Liam and I sit around making small talk, mainly about football and how he likes his apartment and how shit my roommate is.

She’s still acting like I’m her mortal enemy every time we’re in the room together. Maybe she hates how I decorated my side?

No clue.

Then Mason walks up to our small table and joins us. He pecks my lips before he sits next to me.

“How was your class?” I ask, noticing he looks frustrated.

“The class was okay,” he sighs. “But man, it seems like college is going to be hard. I don’t know how I’m going to play football at this level and pass all these classes.”

“You’re way smarter than you pretend to be,” I tell Mason. “It’s actually really annoying how easy everything is for you.”

“It’s not!” he protests.

“It is annoying,” Liam agrees.

Mason laughs and stands up.

“Ready, Princess?” he asks, squeezing my hand gently.

“I’m ready,” I say, squeezing his hand back.

This next class is the only one I have with Mason and the one I’m looking forward to the most—mainly because Mason is in it, but because the class seems like it’s going to be the most interesting one—Psychology 101.

Maybe it will help me figure out what’s going on with my head when I have the attacks like the one when I thought I saw my mom. Driving freaks me out too, ever since the accident—especially when it’s raining.

We wave goodbye to Liam and walk off. The room fills up a lot faster than my first class, and it seems to have a lot more people.

My eye catches someone familiar: Cameron. He makes his way toward me and Mason.

“Hello again.” He smiles, slipping into the empty seat next to Mason.

“Again?” Mason asks, raising his eyebrows.

“Lily was in my first class,” Cameron explains. “Don’t bother hitting on her though. She was very clear she has a boyfriend. Apparently, he plays football too.”

“Yeah, he does. It’s me,” Mason says, sounding pissed off already.

“You’re on the team?” Cameron asks. But before Mason can answer, he continues, “Oh right, you’re one of the backup QBs. Since I’m the starting guard, I mostly know the starters.”

Mason is looking like he wants to slug this dude, and I don’t blame him. To my surprise, Professor Samuels walks in looking just as grumpy as he did earlier.

Mason mutters under his breath, “He looks like he’s going to be a ray of sunshine,” making Cameron laugh a little too loudly.

“I had him before. I actually really liked him,” I tell Mason before Professor Samuels shushes the room.

“All right, enough talking. I’m Professor Samuels,” he begins, sitting down at the desk in the front of the room. “I understand this is a blow-off class for a lot of you, especially for all six of you footballers here.”

My eyebrows raise. Is this a blow-off class? I thought I needed it.

“Long story short, if you don’t take this class seriously, I will fail you. So, if it’s a blow-off for you, leave now and save us both the headache.”

Mason lets out a low whistle. “Are you sure he’s good?” he whispers.

“I’m sure,” I whisper back as I watch four people stand up and walk out.

A voice says, “What if it’s a blow-off class, but I get the work done?” It’s familiar, but I can’t quite place it.

“Then it’s not a blow-off class,” Samuels replies, rolling his eyes. “Let me guess, you’re one of the football players?”

“Quarterback, I’ll be second string,” he replies, and Mason instantly groans, putting his head on the desk in front of him.

And now I know the voice—it’s Oliver, my stupid, cheating, dickhead ex-boyfriend. Out of all the colleges in the country, of course he ends up here.

“I just can’t get away from the asshole,” Mason grunts.

I frown, feeling confused. “Aren’t you quarterback?” I ask.

“Jeff is the starting QB, so Kingsley and I are fighting it out for second string,” Mason explains.

“So, there are three quarterbacks?” I try to get my head around what they’re saying.

“Technically, yes,” Mason answers. He launches into explaining how the team works, but I find myself tuning out.

“Princess,” Mason laughs, “I’ve never seen your eyes glaze over that fast.”

“By the time you’re a pro, I’ll finally know the rules,” I say.

“Doubt it,” Mason says. He’s probably right…

Oliver spins around in his seat and shouts, “Mason going pro? Gonna be hard when I start over him his entire college career.”

Mason just shakes his head, not wanting to get drawn into an argument with the dickhead.

Oliver’s gaze moves to me, and a smirk crosses his face. “I think I’ll enjoy this class more now,” he says, winking at me.

I fake vomit and then say, “Don’t talk to me.”

“Oh, come on, Lily. You used to love it when I talked to you. Especially in bed after we fucked.”

“Watch it, Kingsley,” Mason says, standing up. He earns gasps from the other students.

“What a surprise, Cooper is gonna rage out like usual,” Oliver says with a smirk.

“Please sit down, Mr. Cooper,” Samuels says, making Oliver snort.

“And you, Mr. Kingsley,” Samuels glares at Oliver. “You talk to a fellow student again like you just talked to her, and you’re out.”

Oliver’s cheeks turn bright red as he slowly turns around.

Mason sits down, but I can tell he’s still pissed. I pat his arm, trying to get him to calm down, and I whisper, “Thanks for standing up for me.”

“Always,” he murmurs.

The rest of the class proceeds smoothly, although Mason and Oliver exchange glares every now and then.

My dad sends three consecutive texts, wishing me luck for my first day, apologizing because he forgot to hit send this morning, and another asking how my day is going.

It’s endearing that he’s been thinking of me. I send him back a simple reply.

Lily

Thank you, it’s going well.

By the time class ends, I’m starving again and ready to escape to grab something to eat. In the hallway outside the classroom, Oliver calls out to Mason, halting us both.

“You know you’re not going to make second string,” he declares, that infuriating smirk on his face.

“Just leave me alone,” Mason sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“We all know that I’m the better player and a better boyfriend. When I get second string, Lily is going to come running back to me,” Oliver continues.

I see Mason’s fist clench, his knuckles turning white, so I slip my hand into his and give it a reassuring squeeze.

“Go away, Olly. Leave us alone,” I retort, wishing he would just fuck off and stop bothering us for the rest of our lives. That would be ideal.

“Hey, I’m just speaking the truth,” he says, holding his hands up defensively. “I remember the way you used to moan my name.”

Before I even realize what’s happening, Mason’s hand is ripped out of mine—and he’s storming toward Oliver.