A Penalty for Your Thoughts

Scene 1: The Helmsley Hotel

Heather Blakely

I woke up before him. I probably fell asleep before him. I wonder which one of us decided it'd be more appropriate to sleep next to each other if we were on the rug.

The last thing I remember is us laughing over a plate of sandwiches while music played in the background and he offered to make me another mix...though I'm sure he'll forget, and I'd feel uncomfortable reminding him.

We were starved. Considering no one here does much cooking, the kitchen isn't exactly stocked with ingredients but Leo didn't need much. All I recall is bread, cheese, garlic butter—and it being better than anything I've ever eaten.

I fawned over it and he refused to take the flattery. "Everything tastes better when you're high. Everything feels better too. You have no idea."

"Good afternoon," I said as he began to shuffle awake.

"Hungover?"

"From the drugs?"

He laughed and rubbed his eyes. "Stop saying it like that."

"I feel a little...fuzzy. Will it go away?"

"Yeah, you just need to wake up some more."

I nodded. "Do you want to have breakfast? Or lunch."

"No," he sighed. "I need to get out of here."

"Is Isabel going to be upset with you?"

"Nah, looks like Phil's gonna come in handy, after all."

I smiled and shook my head. "It's nice to know you're warming up."

"...Can you not tell anyone I was here?"

"Sure," I laughed. "You weren't supposed to fall asleep anyway."

"No, I mean I was never at your party in the first place."

"...why?" My eyebrows drew together. "What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing, but I keep telling you—she's not comfortable with us being friends."

"Yes, but it seemed you found a way around that," considering no one forced you to come by or be near me, but you chose to.

"I just don't want to fight with you."

I scoffed. "That's your excuse? Any time you spend with me is simply to 'avoid conflict?'" He let out a breath, but the phone started to ring before he could respond. "One second." I rolled my eyes and picked it up. "Hello?"

"Heather, did you know about Tony's girlfriend?" Lisa asked.

"Sabrina?"

"Alison."

"...Alison and Tony?" A long time coming. "Oh...I'm sorry, Lisa."

"When..." Her voice cracks. "I thought..."

"It must have happened recently, and he didn't know how you felt..."

"Well, yes, but it hurts anyway."

"I know..."

"Do you mind if I let Austin take me to the dance tonight?"

"Of course. Whatever is best for you."

"You'll still go, won't you? I'll need more moral support than just him."

"I already have a ticket, so I might as well."

"Thank you, Heather."

"See you soon." The phone clicks on the other end, and I'm tempted to pretend she's still speaking so I can shoo Leo away—but I don't.

"Everything alright with Lisa?"

I nodded, reluctantly. "A guy she liked started dating someone else. She must have liked him more than she let on."

"Damn, that sucks."

"It's a mistake to think a few good moments with someone means anything." I gesture toward the door. "You can go. I'm sorry for keeping you."

"You weren't. It's not-" he sighed. "Never mind."

"You should stop trying."

"Huh?"

"To not fight with me. It looks too much like friendship."

Scene 2: The Plaza Hotel

Trevor Bailey

"Hey," Jace said while nudging me. "Get up. I'm hungry."

"Go home," I replied, gruffly.

"No. I smell food."

"Then, go have some, genius."

"I would, but it sounds like you have guests," he answered with a hint of slyness.

I picked my head up to listen better and groaned at the realization. "The voice of a she-devil."

"Carrying her very own hellhound."

"I can't rest while she's here." Her presence makes my hair raise and hands tremble. I throw the blanket off of me and Jace, forcing us both up.

"Perhaps you should be more cautious with who you stick it in."

"Easy for you to say. You don't have half as many options."

Harry's head falls in shame as soon as I walk out. Clearly, we know who let her in.

"Crepes, Mr. Trevor?"

I scowled. "In a minute, Harry."

"She came to drop off paperwork for your father," he answered before I could even begin to question her.

"You're showing," I eyed the budding baby bump.

"She's healthy."

"That's great for Arthur."

"Her name is Lorelei."

"Pretty." I pressed my lips together and pretended my heart is beating at a normal pace. This infant becomes more real with every passing day. "Did he help?"

"Did you expect him to?" She said in a solemn revelation. "He doesn't want this child."

"I, for one, will be happy to see the new addition," Harry announced, attempting to prompt a smile from her.

"Would you look at that? She'll have a father after all," I taunted.

"And a brother, yes, sir?"

I scoffed. "What, is she having twins?" And Harry looked disappointedly at me as I headed toward breakfast in the kitchen rather than a nursery in my worst nightmares.

"You're such an asshole," Jace laughed as he entered after me.

"What's growing inside of her is none of my business."

"And yet you will be on the donor list when Audrey wants a child."

"Only if I can do it the old-fashioned way." Besides, we'd create a perfect baby.

"I'm glad it isn't yours," Jace admitted. "I was imagining how annoying it would be to have you move in with me after your father tried to murder you."

I smirked. "I'd make you give me your room."

"I know."

"And I would become your parents' favorite child."

"Well, you'd be your dad's least favorite, so it's only fair," Jace joked—and it was funny...in theory.

We laughed but I couldn't keep up the ruse.

It is hard to make light of this situation.

"...I tampered with the results."

"...What?"

"Vivian's baby...it doesn't matter what the truth is, it can't be mine."

"What if it is?" He whispered, harshly.

"Lorelei...she is better off not knowing either."

"Are we sure of that? Her life is a pretty puzzle already and she's still forming."

"What would you have done?"

"Told my father when and how we had been introduced as soon as he said 'hey, son, this is your potential new mommy.'"

"You weren't there. You don't know how fun it was keeping quiet."

"You don't seem to be having fun."

I glared. "You aren't either, lonely."

"Fair enough.." Jace said, shamelessly. "I invited this girl from AIM to the ball. She thought it was insane that I wanted someone I've never met to be my date."

"She's right. Are the women you know too real for you?"

He rolled his eyes. "They are plenty real and plenty stressing."

"I see therapy is a waste of time."

"Venus is easy to talk to."

"I imagine it is easier to speak when a colon and a parenthesis can do your bidding,"

"Shut up. We're both alone tonight."

"I hope you're not suggesting we go together."

"And let everyone see that I couldn't do better?"

"There's not a short enough dress that could make you entice me." I patted him on the shoulder. "It's unrequited, Jace."

"If I was a girl, you'd be chasing me down."

"If you were a girl, you'd be in a line with the rest of them."

Scene 3: Addington High

Ethan Carey

"Here by yourself, 22?" Logan smiled with his arm around a girl.

"That number is retired. I'm not sure I know how to play anymore."

"No game on or off the field?" He teased.

"No interest in playing."

Though, I've been thinking about Elizabeth. I lost that game. Stupidly.

I tried to call her, but she must have a different number now. I wanted to tell her I walked by Carnal recently, and it has been desecrated. They're going to turn it into a church, I believe.

I also want to hear her voice—hear her insult me and wish me the worst. What a woman.

It's such a bad habit to want what I've had only after it's no longer up for grabs.

There's nothing here catching my attention. I huff in boredom while leaving the common area.

Where is Trevor when you need petty trouble to get into?

"I adore Natalia," I hear Audrey's voice coming from a dim classroom. "She's the reason the sun shines on you deviants."

"And yet it's dark out," another girl replies.

"Why are you trying to ruin my life?"

"Is that what you think?"

"You went from torturing me to kissing me. So, yes—that is what I think."

Now, I'm curious...

I step closer to get a peek at who she's speaking to.

I saw this coming, actually. Maisilyn has a quality that even I wouldn't mind seeing more of.

"I usually don't like girls like you—too prissy and stuck up to be tolerable."

"I was tolerable enough for you to try and replicate me."

Maisilyn scoffed. "Only to show you how insufferable you are."

"Then why did you kiss me?"

"Attraction."

Been there.

"Baseless?"

"Your personality is repulsive, your need to be the best at everything is aggravating, and if you had no idea what you looked like, I'm sure you'd be a better person."

"If you knew what you looked like, I'm sure you'd be quiet."

"It doesn't have to be more than this."

"What's more of nothing?"

"We can get rid of it. That's all I've ever wanted to do...know what it would be like so I don't have to wonder anymore."

"The nerve of you to torment me over your sick fantasy."

"And here I thought you could handle a little friendly competition," Maisilyn laughed. "Someone needed to stand up to you."

"How lucky I am that it was a fan," Audrey snarked.

"Mm."

"Mm."

Is that all? I could think of ten more responses-

...My, Audrey. What have you gotten yourself into?

The reason their mouths are closed is that they're pressed together.

My head turns at the sound of heels clicking the tiles as someone approaches. For a second it felt like I was the one getting caught.

"Natalia," I said, hoping I'd be loud enough to separate Rosaline and Juliet.

"Ethan..." she replied, unaware that her girlfriend is in close quarters with another dame.

'It's not what you think, Natalia. Audrey passed out and Maisilyn is resuscitating her, the Good Samaritan that she is.'

But that would only convince the deaf, blind, and dumb.

"Can I have this dance?" I asked, putting my arm over her shoulder and leading her back to the ballroom.

"Absolutely not." She pushed me off.

"Where is Audrey? The restroom, I'm assuming. We all know how long it takes her to refresh her makeup." I continue to urge her further from the room. "Allow me to preoccupy you. She'd never let me close enough to speak and there's something I'd like to say."

Natalia crossed her arms. "I won't dance with you."

"So be it." I nodded in the direction of the rest of our classmates. Her hesitance nearly blew up her relationship, but I got her to move before Audrey could give herself away.

"Could you make this quick? I don't want her to see us."

"Something tells me she feels the same," I laughed to myself, though her annoyance silenced me. "I've recently reconnected with my long lost...mother, and it has been rather enlightening."

"What does this have to do with Audrey?"

"The man who fathered me has a habit of breaking the hearts of the women that love him...and being a product of that leaves a bad taste in my mouth," I admitted. Yes, I'm capable of guilt, it just doesn't appear fast enough. "Audrey once confessed that she loved me. And I knew it before she fought against her judgment and said it. What I did to her was inexcusable."

"Understatement."

"I appreciate the fact that she detests me. Being able to carry that amount of hatred means she'd never allow me to hurt her again. However, I'm afraid it means she has the capacity to hurt you or someone who tries to love her..."

"She's not like you."

"I hope not," for your sake, "But forgive her...if she happens to do something I would probably do."

Scene 4: Addington High

Leo Rylin

It wasn't easy to admit, but I wanted to go to this thing. I wanted Elle to make a big deal about going so I could groan and then say "fine, we'll go. If you want to," but she ended up saying that to me after I got kinda sad about her laughing off the idea.

I told her we could go out after and act like these outfits are costumes.

"You want something to drink?" I asked her.

"Later."

"...You look nice."

She smiled, finally. "You look hot."

I chuckled and pulled her into me so she'd wrap her arms around my body.

Right before we got here, Elle and her mom started fighting. It was a bad one, and I just sat awkwardly while they yelled at each other. Her mom was mad about how expensive Elle's dress was and how much she is willing to spend on herself without helping around the house or with bills.

They nearly came to blows. She's been in a mood ever since.

It killed some time too. We were gonna come as a group, but Danny said he was taking Amanda and Elle backed out immediately. Mandy loves high school stuff, and he clearly loves her—as a friend or something, I don't know.

"Hi!" Heather smiled at her. She came with that guy she brought back from Italy as a souvenir. As soon as I walked in I saw them kissing, it's like she calls him whenever she wants to be touched...and he's obviously not complaining.

"Heather!" Amanda reached for her and they hugged like best friends reuniting after time apart.

She's going to rub it in my face that Heather likes her even after everything.

...That Heather likes her more than me after everything,

The jokes about Amanda stealing her are probably a lot funnier to her now, but I won't get the chance to ask tonight.

I could start problems with a single wave.

Heather and Danny can't stand each other but they're not making a big issue about it. I couldn't ask Elle to cool it for a night.

All of my friends get to hang out and have a good time and I'm not allowed to join them.

I haven't even talked to Matt since we fought...

And I can't blame you, it's not your fault. No matter what I do, I feel like I'm treating you badly—like I'm the worst boyfriend in history.

"Are you happy?" I asked her.

"Yeah." She looked up at me, comfortable and content. "Are you?"

I nod and kiss her on the forehead. I nod...but look off at my friends.

"I heard girls talking about sneaking to guest houses and suites with their hormonal dates," she said, amused.

"Last year of high school." I shrugged. "Last chance to hook up with their crushes."

"Should we?"

"...should we what?"

"Get a room, nothing fancy—the opposite actually. Something a dirty rockstar would like."

I scoffed through laughter. "You're funny."

"I'm serious. You never spend the night."

Life's fucking weird sometimes. It's weird we're having this conversation again right after I woke up next to Heather. It's weird that I was with her a few hours ago and now I'm watching some guy feel her up.

My eyes return to Elle before she can notice where they were instead.

It's interesting that you can meet someone you like so much that you want to make them cum.

"So?" She adds.

I could make up for a lot, and it's not like the offer isn't tempting. I wouldn't mind some action, I'm the reason we haven't been going past making out.

But if it puts a smile on her face, I wouldn't complain about laying back and letting her be all over me. I've been craving it. Skin to skin, toe-curling, moaning, Heather—Elle.

Elle. Elle. Elle.

Man, I shouldn't do this today.

"Prices are gonna be jacked up. Let's save the money and splurge on something clean maybe next weekend."

I turn us so that my back is to Heather and her name can't pop into my head anymore and make me slip up. That's all it is—losing focus and then zoning in on whatever I see. It's just a mental thing.

Elle pouted. "But I don't want to go home tonight..."

"Right, the thing with your mom," I nodded. Fuck. "Yeah...okay. Stay at my place." So much for avoiding quick relationship progress...

"You don't mind?"

"Why would I? You're my girl."