4. Sad Topics

-Sky-

I heard the conversation on the bus. I was almost in tears when I heard the mean words about me. It hurt more than I could've imagined. I had expected people to start laughing, but to my surprise, no one did.

And then Max said I was his friend. I couldn't believe it... Soon, we arrived at the school, and everyone started gathering their things and getting up from their seats. I tried to see Max, but I was too short to spot him behind the wall of people.

I hurried outside and saw a glimpse of Max with his friends walking towards the entrance. I wanted to run after him and thank him for standing up for me, but I lost my courage when more people joined his little squad. I would only freeze if I tried to speak with him in front of everyone.

I followed him from a distance and even managed to get in the right class in time – only because Max had the same class with me. He was sitting in the middle of the room, and I kept peering at him the whole time. He always looked good, but when he smiled or laughed, he looked like an angel. I wouldn't have been surprised if God himself had appeared in our classroom to take him back to paradise where he belonged.

I tried to concentrate on the class, I really did, but when it ended, I couldn't even remember what we'd studied. I grabbed my bag and tried to follow Max, but I lost sight of him. By the time I got outside, he was gone again.

I sighed, still looking around. Absolutely everyone in the hallway had someone right next to them. I saw best friends and couples wherever I looked. They all seemed so happy chatting with each other, having fun.

Then there was me. The lonely, weird geek. I had enjoyed talking with Max, and it made me realize how much I missed having company. If only there was someone who liked nature too. Someone who wanted to talk about it, but it seemed like people thought talking about animals was too childish or something. It wasn't cool to talk about cats and dogs.

I wandered around the school while waiting for the next period to start, trying to ignore the big groups of friends. No one paid any attention to me, and even though it was better than being bullied, I still kind of wanted someone to notice me. I felt like a ghost haunting the place.

The rest of the day wasn't any different. I was too shy to talk with strangers, and no one was interested in starting a conversation with me. I had no idea why the loneliness was wearing me down so much. Maybe because I'd had fun with Max the previous day, and now I was alone again.

I wondered if Max remembered his promise to go shopping with me after his practice. When the last bell rang, I headed to the football field. There was a huge crowd of students on the bleachers. Some were doing their homework while the others watched the team warming up.

I found an empty corner and sat down to watch. I saw Max at the other side of the field with a couple of his teammates. Wherever he went, there were always people following him. What was it like to have so many friends?

If only I had even one friend. That would be more than enough for me. Just someone to talk to and hang out at school. Maybe even after school...

Gosh, this really was bothering me, wasn't it?

"Hey, Sky."

I snapped out of my thoughts when Max stopped right in front of me.

"H-Hi," I said sheepishly.

"Are you still up for that shopping trip after I'm finished here?" Max asked.

"Y-Yeah..." I nodded.

I had a blush forming on my cheeks, and it made me even more anxious. People were watching us, probably wondering why someone like Max was wasting his time with someone like me. His friends were waiting for him a few steps away, looking annoyed.

"Are you waiting for me here or do you want to meet me at the mall?" Max asked.

"I can wait," I said hastily. "I know nothing about football, but I want to learn."

"I can teach you," Max said, and glanced over his shoulder when someone called for him. "Stay here – I'll come get you once this is over," he told me before returning to his friends.

It was funny how a few little words could cheer me up. I instantly forgot how miserable I'd been the whole day. Max still remembered I existed and wanted to spend time with me! I couldn't have been happier!

The team started their practice. I'd seen a few football games before, but I never understood what was so fascinating about running around the field with a weird-looking ball under their arm. They kept yelling weird words and pushing each other onto the ground, trying to catch the guy who had the ball. Why did people find it entertaining to watch players getting hurt? I just couldn't understand it.

An hour later, the team limped to change their clothes. I stayed in my seat and waited for Max to come get me, but it took a long time before he returned to the field. He waved at his friends before he ran slowly to me with a big smile on his face.

"Did you learn anything?" he asked, stopping in front of me.

"I learned that football is a violent game," I said.

Max laughed cheerily at my words. He was fresh from the shower, which explained why it had taken him so long to come back.

"It's not that bad. If you want, I can tell you more about the game," he said.

Football wasn't something I cared about, but he had listened to me ranting about pigeons, so I nodded.

"All right," he said with a smile. "Come, I'll tell you all about it while we walk."

When he started talking about the game... If I was completely honest with myself, I would've listened to him even if he talked about fashion or something else I didn't find interesting. I was more than happy to walk with him and have his full attention to myself.

We arrived at the mall about half an hour later. He'd been talking the entire time, and even though I still had no clue how to play the game, I was still in high spirits. He really was enthusiastic about the game, so it was fun to listen.

"Oh, I see! I get it now," I said with a smile when he finally took a pause.

He looked at me with a disbelieving smile. "No, you didn't," he chuckled.

"No, I didn't," I sighed in misery. "I'm sorry. I can be really stupid sometimes..."

"Don't say that," Max said, and patted my shoulder. "You're not stupid."

I couldn't help but imagine the lie in his voice. Max had spent a long time trying to explain the basics of football, but I couldn't understand a word he was saying, like he was suddenly speaking a whole new language. He was nice enough not to get frustrated with me, but I believed it was irritating for him when I couldn't understand even the simple things.

"It's all right..." I muttered.

Max frowned at me. "Well, you know a lot about nature, so you can't be stupid," he said. "It's not a big deal if you don't care about sports."

I didn't know what to say. I knew he was just being nice, like he always was. I followed him silently through the huge doors into the mall, almost bumping into him when he suddenly stopped.

"Where can we get the camping equipment?" Max asked, looking around.

"It's this way," I said quietly, making my way towards the escalators.

The shop that sold primarily camping and hiking equipment was on the third floor, where the other not-so-cool stores were. I saw some of our classmates and other teenagers on our way up, but we were the only ones heading to the third floor.

I led Max past the shops that sold everything from knitting supplies to baby clothes. I noticed him looking around, but he clearly wasn't interested in anything he saw. He looked out of place. There were only adults with small children around us, and even they seemed to wonder why Max was there. I was blending in perfectly, but he was like a neon sign.

"It's here," I told him, and stopped in front of a quiet shop.

I was a regular customer there, so the cashier waved at me with a friendly smile on his face when he saw me.

"Do you know him?" Max asked with curiosity in his voice. "I thought you moved here a month ago."

I blushed lightly. "I've been here a few times..."

"Oh, okay," Max said and looked around.

The truth was, I'd been there a few times every week after moving here since I kept breaking or losing my stuff. Sometimes I just came there to pass some time since I didn't have much to do after school.

But Max didn't need to know that.

"So, what do I need?"

"Boots and a sleeping bag," I told him, and walked towards the back of the shop.

I had pretty much everything else for camping, so it didn't take long to find Max what he needed. I waited while he was at the checkout and started feeling sad when he followed me out of the shop.

"Are you sure this is all I need?" Max asked, studying the label of his new sleeping bag.

"Yeah, I already have everything else," I told him, searching for the nearest clock.

It was six already... I turned to look at Max, who was also checking the time.

"Well, thanks for help," he said with a smile. "I would've bought the wrong things without you. I had no idea there's so many hiking boots and sleeping bags."

I was about to start a lecture on all the things he needed to consider when buying camping equipment, but managed to snap my mouth shut. I didn't want to spend the last minutes together boring him to death.

"So, uh, about this weekend...?" I spoke timidly.

"I'm free," Max said. "Are we going to check out the barn on Saturday?"

I nodded enthusiastically and gave him a smile. I'd spent every weekend alone, so it was nice to finally have someone accompanying me when I left to explore the forest.

"Do we need to stay the night there?" Max asked.

"We don't have to if you don't want to. We can start with the project next week, but I want to go see what we're up against so we can come up with a proper plan," I told him.

He chuckled lightly, his eyes sparkling. "You sound like we're going there to conquer the place," he said jokingly.

"I just... like to be prepared," I smirked, feeling a little embarrassed.

He stared at me for a moment before he spoke, "You know, at first I thought this wasn't going to work out. I was afraid you wouldn't even speak to me," he finally said, taking me by surprise.

"Oh...I know I can be awkward to hang out with..." I muttered.

"That's not what I said," he said sternly. "What I'm saying is that I'm glad you're not feeling so shy around me anymore. This project would get really difficult if you didn't talk to me."

"I'm trying," I said, since he clearly waited for my reply. "I'm just not used to having–"

I snapped my mouth shut before I could say the word, friends. I didn't want to sound lame and pathetic.

"I mean... I just moved here, and... I... I'm kind of a geek..." I stuttered hastily, but fell silent again, realizing I was just making the situation worse.

Why couldn't I be one of the cool kids? Cool kids were good with words, and they always sounded so confident and interesting. I was just a whiny little nerd who had a children's backpack and dressed in grandpa-clothes.

"You're not a geek," Max said, patting my shoulder. "You're just different, and that's not a bad thing."

That just made me feel even worse. I felt like a ten-year-old being comforted by his big brother.

"Thanks..."

I wasn't sure if Max knew being different meant being a geek. I was fine with being the weird one, but it was making things harder for me. I wanted to tell him that, but my mouth wasn't cooperating.

He looked at the clock again. I was pretty sure he was trying to find a nice way to tell me he had to go already.

"I'm starving, should we go grab something to eat?" he asked, taking me by surprise again.

I stared at him like he had just grown a pair of antlers or something. He stared back at me, frowning at my expression.

"Or... not?" he asked.

"No! I mean yes! Sure. I'm hungry too," I managed to mumble.

"Great! Do you eat meat?" he asked as we started walking.

"I do, but..." I had my principles, but I wasn't sure if he cared about it.

He looked at me and smiled. "I know a place that sells great organic food," he said. Was he reading my mind?

I fell in love with him all over again. Not literally, of course. Maybe. I didn't know! He was so handsome it was hard to stay straight. And he ate organic food!

I followed him out of the mall like a happy little puppy. I probably looked like a complete idiot, worshipping him with a stupid smile on my face, and the worst part was that he noticed it.

"Why are you looking at me like that," he chuckled. "I'm just trying to make good choices in my life."

"No, of course! I just... I just thought no one else cared about organic food," I muttered.

"Organic is healthier," Max shrugged. "And I prefer to support local farmers and businesses instead of big worldwide industries."

"Oh," I said enthusiastically.

How great was he? He wasn't just another mindless jock who only cared about having the hottest cheerleader as his girlfriend. Why didn't he have a girlfriend? Everyone knew he was still single, even though there was a long line of takers in our school.

My thoughts weren't making any sense at that moment.

"It's this way," he said once we were standing outside on the sunny street, pointing to our left. "They have a great salad bar. My friends usually want to eat at fast-food joints, so I don't get to go there often."

I couldn't do anything else except smile like an idiot while following him through the streets. I didn't even pay attention to where we were going, and he had to grab me so I wouldn't walk in front of a car. Twice.

"Sorry..." I muttered after the second time.

He took a deep breath with a partly scared, and partly worried look on his face. He still had a strong grip on my backpack when we crossed the street.

"You really should watch where you're going," he sighed, and released me.

"I'm sorry," I said again, and he shook his head.

"I guess I need to keep my eyes on you," he said with a cheerier tone.

After that, I paid attention to where I was going, and we finally got to the restaurant in one piece. It was a nice-looking place, but awfully quiet, too. There was another restaurant right across the street with more people inside, and seeing it made me sad. It was just another place where no one cared how the animals were treated before death.

I turned my attention to Max, who was walking towards the cashier. The girl behind the register had a bored look on her face.

"How may I help – you," her bored look melted away when she saw Max, and a smile appeared on her lips faster than the eye could see.

I chuckled quietly at her expression. It was the same one I had whenever I was with Max. He sure looked good.

Once we had our food, we went to sit down at a table close to the windows. I couldn't say the view was fascinating, but Max kept peering at the building across the street. I tried to see what was so interesting but didn't spot anything out of the ordinary.

"What is it?" I finally asked since he was still staring outside.

"Sorry," he said, turning his attention to me. "I think it's just beautiful," he continued, grabbing his fork.

"What is?" I asked, and looked out again.

"That building. It's one of the oldest in this city. I love all those details," Max said, turning his attention back to the building. He had a tender smile on his face.

I once watched a documentary about people who wanted to marry buildings. I wasn't quite sure why that thought popped in my head. Max wasn't like that, was he?

I think he noticed my wondering expression when he turned to look at me again.

"I want to be an architect," he explained.

"Ohh!" I sighed in relief.

I mean, I had zero chances with him, but it was nice to know that I had better chances than buildings. What an odd thought.

"What do you want to be? Let me guess. A vet?" Max spoke, and I blushed a little.

"Is it that obvious?" I chuckled. "Yeah. I want to work with animals."

He nodded lightly. "That's a good job. Do you have any pets then?"

My smile vanished slowly, and I shook my head. "No."

Max looked surprised. "How come?"

I took a bite of my food, feeling sad. "I had a dog. His name was Brutus."

"Did he die?" Max asked sympathetically.

"Yeah... Two years ago," I said. "He was just five years old when he got cancer."

"I'm sorry to hear that," he said quietly.

I shrugged. "He was just a dog..."

"I can tell he was not just a dog," Max spoke. "Not to you."

I have no idea how I managed to stop myself from bursting into tears. Brutus had been my best friend, and when he died, I couldn't take it. No one else had ever understood how much he meant to me, and how horrible it was for me to lose him.

"I can't do it again," I said with a tiny voice. "I love animals, but I can't..."

"I understand," Max said quietly. "I can't even imagine how hard it must've been to lose a friend."

Max was so amazing. His words comforted me, and I felt a little better again.

"How about you? Do you have any pets?" I asked.

"My mom has a cat. That bastard hates me," Max chuckled.

"Cats can be grumpy," I chuckled. "I'd like to meet him someday."

"All right, but I must warn you, he really is an asshole," Max said.

I just smiled at him. I was excited to meet the little devil, but I was curious to see Max's home too. That would mean I'd get to spend more time with him.

"Why architect and not football?" I asked. "I've heard you're amazing enough to even go professional."

He chuckled lightly. "Football is fun, but it's a bit of a long shot. Besides, I'd like to have a steady job. A secure one, you know?"

After I nodded, he continued telling me about his dreams to create something beautiful, but practical, and how he'd always been fascinated by architecture.

"I was eight when I built my first treehouse with my mom," he said proudly. "It's still in our backyard. I've renovated it a few times when I got older."

"I definitely want to see it," I told him. "Does your mom like building stuff too?"

Max's smile trembled a little, and he looked down at his food. "No – she's not into any of that. I just needed her help."

There was something in his eyes when he spoke... I wasn't good at reading people, but it was obvious something was weighing him down.

"Did I say something wrong?"

"No, of course not," Max said reassuringly. "It's just... Never mind."

"What?" I asked quietly. "You can tell me anything. I won't tell anyone."

Max gave me a small smile, hesitating for a moment. "My dad promised to help me with it. He never did..."

"Is your dad...?" I wanted to ask if he was still alive, but I didn't know how.

"He was drunk all the time," Max said quietly. "I begged him for months, but he never had the time. He was always drinking and watching TV if he wasn't at work. I guess Mom felt bad for me since she bought a book about treehouses," Max paused for a moment, and smiled. "She learned how to build one just to help me."

I could tell the subject was as hard for him as it was for me to talk about Brutus. I wondered if Max's dad had ever hurt him physically. It was clear he had hurt him mentally.

"I'm so sorry. That must've been awful," I said quietly, unable to even imagine how it was like to live with a drunk parent.

"He's been sober for two years now, but I don't think we can fix things between us. I don't know if I even want to," he said. "There's just no... I don't feel a connection with him anymore. He was a drunk for years. My parents nearly divorced because of it."

"I understand that," I told him. "There are things that can't be fixed."

Max took a deep breath and nodded. "I think we covered up all the sad topics now," he said with a more cheerful tone.

I hesitated for a moment, but then found courage to say what I wanted. "If you ever want to talk about anything, I'll listen. I know we are just partners for the project, but I want to be your friend, too."

Max stared at me for a moment. I felt like I'd just stepped over the line or something. Like I had no right to ask to be his friend.

"I'd like that," he said softly.

I felt somehow awkward and joyful at the same time. We ate in silence for a moment, but then he looked at me.

"But how are we going to follow the owls in the darkness?" he asked.

"Oh, I have night vision goggles, and a camera," I told him.

He stared at me for a moment. "Who are you? A spy?" he joked, and I giggled lightly.

"Like I said, I have everything else we need," I smiled. "I didn't wish for video games for Christmas."

Max stared at me for a moment. "Now I wish I hadn't asked for video games for Christmas."

I laughed cheerily and continued eating my salad. It tasted really good, and I hoped I could go there again soon. With Max.