21.

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Before I knew it, my eyes were fluttering open, the room still drenched in darkness, the only light coming from the dim glow of my phone screen on the nightstand. My heart was beating a little too fast, my body heavy with exhaustion, but something in me had snapped awake like my subconscious already knew what time it was.

I blinked a few times, trying to adjust to the darkness, then slowly reached for my phone, squinting as the bright screen illuminated my face.

4:00 AM.

My chest tightened instantly.

Daddy was gonna be home soon.

My breath hitched, and I turned my head, my eyes landing on Ren, still deep asleep beside me. She looked so peaceful, her breathing slow and steady, her lips slightly parted. The soft rise and fall of her chest, the way one of her arms was still lazily draped across my waist like even in sleep, she didn't wanna let go.

And it hit me all at once—I wasted all our time together.

My stomach twisted painfully.

I should've been awake, making the most of every last second we had. I should've been talking to her, memorizing her voice, taking in the warmth of her body, letting myself get lost in her touch.

But instead?

I slept through it.

A lump formed in my throat as I stared at her, my fingers gripping the blanket.

She was about to leave.

And I didn't even know when I'd see her again.

The panic crept in slowly, a dull ache in my chest that only got worse the longer I sat there, watching her, realizing that when the sun came up—when my daddy walked through those doors—everything was gonna change.

I wanted to wake her up.

I wanted to shake her, pull her close, kiss her like it was the last time, beg her to stay even though I knew she couldn't.

But I just sat there, my breathing shaky, my mind racing.

Why did time move so fast?

I felt like I was already losing her, and she wasn't even gone yet.

I could hear my own breathing speed up, each inhale coming shorter and sharper as the weight of everything started pressing down on my chest. My mind was racing, spiraling, already hearing Daddy's voice in my head.

"Yanna, what the fuck did you do?"

I could picture the look on his face, the disappointment, the anger, the way his presence alone could make me feel like I was ten years old again, standing in front of him after messing up. My body felt too hot, my skin prickling, my hands curling into fists against the blanket.

Ren was leaving.

Daddy was coming home.

Everything was falling apart, and I could barely breathe.

I didn't even realize how loud my breathing had gotten until I felt a shift next to me. The bed dipped, the warmth of her body moving closer, and before I could even try to pull myself together—

The light flicked on.

I squeezed my eyes shut against the sudden brightness, my chest still rising and falling too fast, my hands gripping at the sheets. My whole body was tense, like I was bracing myself for something, like the walls were closing in, like—

"Hey. Hey, look at me."

Ren's voice. Soft. Steady. Right there.

I barely had time to react before she was pulling me into her, arms strong, secure, holding me like she was trying to shield me from my own thoughts. One of her hands slid up to the back of my head, her fingers threading through my hair, grounding me.

I exhaled shakily, my face pressing into her warmth, into the smell of her skin, the faint scent of whatever body wash she used mixing with her natural scent—something safe, something that made my chest ache even more.

Her voice was quieter this time, right next to my ear.

"Breathe, baby. Just breathe."

I tried.

I really did.

But my breath hitched again, my body betraying me, my emotions creeping up too fast for me to push them back down.

Ren didn't let go.

She just kept holding me, her other hand rubbing slow, soothing circles against my back, like she was waiting for me to come back down, like she wasn't gonna let me fall apart alone.

I clenched my jaw, swallowing hard, trying to focus on her touch instead of the million thoughts pounding in my head.

Daddy's gonna lose it.

He's gonna send her away.

He's gonna send me away.

Another shaky exhale.

Ren felt it.

"I got you," she murmured, her lips brushing against my temple. "You hear me? I got you."

And I wanted to believe her.

I wanted to believe that everything was gonna be okay, that this wasn't the end of us, that when she left, I wouldn't feel like a piece of me was missing.

But the fear was still there, sitting heavy on my chest.

So I just nodded, my fingers gripping onto her shirt, holding onto her like I was scared she'd disappear before the sun even came up.

Ren didn't rush me.

She just held me, her warmth easing some of the tension in my body. The sound of her heartbeat, slow and steady against my ear, was calming in a way I didn't expect.

Then, gently, she pulled back just enough to grab the water bottle off the nightstand.

"Drink this for me, Lil Mama."

I hesitated for half a second before taking it from her, bringing it to my lips. The cool water slid down my throat, grounding me more with every sip. Ren watched me the whole time, her eyes soft, her expression unreadable.

When I finished, she took the bottle from my hands and set it aside.

"Good," she murmured, pressing a kiss to my forehead. "Now breathe with me."

I blinked up at her. "Breathe?"

"Yeah," she said simply, shifting so she was facing me fully. "Deep breath in, hold for four, out for six. Do it with me."

I wanted to tell her it was stupid, that it wouldn't work, that my chest was still tight and my head was still spinning. But when she inhaled deeply, watching me, waiting for me to follow—

I did.

I took a breath, following her lead, holding it for four, exhaling slow.

Again.

And again.

By the third time, I realized my shoulders weren't so tense anymore. My heart wasn't racing as fast. The panic had loosened, just a little, just enough for me to feel her hands on me instead of the weight in my chest.

Ren smiled, slow and lazy, like she was proud.

She leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to my lips this time.

"There she go," she whispered against my mouth. "My baby did so good for me."

My chest tightened again—but not in the bad way.

I swallowed hard, my throat suddenly thick with emotion, and instead of answering her, I just leaned into her. My arms wrapped around her waist, and I pressed my face against her collarbone, breathing her in.

She let me.

Didn't tease me. Didn't rush me.

Just let me be close.

I sighed, my fingers lazily tracing over the tattoos on her forearm before moving to her hands. I ran my fingers over the smooth metal of her rings, admiring them like I always did.

I loved Ren's hands.

The veins. The strength. The way they felt on me.

I let my thumb slide over her pinky ring, the one she always wore—until, suddenly, she pulled it off and grabbed my hand.

Before I could even ask what she was doing, she slid it onto my ring finger, twisting it into place.

I stared down at it, my lips parting slightly. "Ren—"

"Wear it," she said simply. "It's yours now."

Something about that made my stomach flip.

I turned my hand, watching the way the ring sat on my finger, feeling its weight. Feeling her.

I bit my lip. "You sure?"

She smirked, leaning in until her lips brushed my cheek. "What kinda question is that? You think I'd take it back?"

I shook my head. "No, but..." I trailed off, looking at the ring again, swallowing. "It means a lot."

She means a lot.

Ren hummed, pressing another kiss to my temple. "Good."

And just like that, I was hers.

Ren's lips trailed over my face, pressing kisses everywhere—my cheeks, my nose, my forehead, even my eyelids.

I giggled, squirming under her, trying to push her away. "Ren, stop!"

"Nah." She grinned, holding me in place as she pressed another kiss to my jaw, then my chin. "You too cute."

I whined, laughing breathlessly. "Okay, okay, enough—"

But she shut me up with a long, deep kiss.

And I melted.

I forgot about the time, forgot about everything—until a loud pounding on my bedroom door nearly made me jump out my skin.

"YANNA!"

My stomach dropped.

"Shit," I whispered, my eyes going wide.

Ren groaned against my lips, clearly annoyed. "Who the hell—"

"Yanna Noelle Hill! Open this damn door!"

My father's voice.

The blood in my veins turned to ice.

Oh my God.

I scrambled up, heart racing, pushing Ren off me. "Go in the closet. Now."

She didn't move. Didn't even look worried. Just smirked at me like this was some kind of joke. "Relax, Lil Mama."

"Ren, I'm serious—"

More pounding. Louder.

"Yanna, do not make me say it again!"

My hands started shaking. Panic rising.

"Ren, go!" I whispered harshly, shoving her toward the closet.

She sighed, moving slow on purpose. Taking her sweet-ass time.

"One more kiss."

I nearly screamed. "Ren—"

She grabbed my waist, pecked my lips.

"Another one."

Another kiss.

The pounding got louder.

"Yanna! Now!"

I shoved her inside, barely holding in my frustration. "Shut up and stay in here!"

She grinned, unbothered as hell. "You gone miss me."

I rolled my eyes and slammed the closet door shut.

Taking a deep breath, I turned and opened my bedroom door.

And there he was.

My father.

His suit was wrinkled, his tie was loose, and his eyes were blazing with fury.

I swallowed hard, my heart hammering. This was it.

The second the door shut, it started.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU, YANNA?!"

I flinched, stepping back as my father stormed inside, slamming the door behind him. His face was twisted with rage, veins bulging at his temples, and the sheer force of his voice made my body lock up.

"You have any idea what you've done? What the media is saying about you? About ME? About this whole goddamn family?!"

I opened my mouth, but before I could get a word out—

"YOU THINK THIS SHIT IS CUTE?!" His voice boomed through the room, his hands flying up. "Running around with some dyke bodyguard, embarrassing me in front of the entire goddamn world?"

My stomach dropped.

My whole body went cold.

I felt the sting of his words like a slap to the face.

"You ain't got no shame, huh?" he spat, pacing, shaking his head. "No damn self-respect? Acting like a little—"

He said a word that made my chest cave in.

I sucked in a sharp breath, my hands trembling at my sides.

"Daddy, please—"

"PLEASE WHAT?!" He turned on me so fast I almost stepped back again. "You think crying gon' fix this?! You think I can just ignore the fact that my daughter—MY OWN DAMN DAUGHTER—is out here making a fool of herself?! You think people ain't laughing at me, huh?! You think they don't see me as weak now?!"

I shook my head, my vision blurring with tears. "I'm not trying to embarrass you—"

"Bullshit! You selfish as hell, Yanna!" He pointed a finger at me, jabbing it in the air. "Ain't even thinking about what this does to this family—what this does to ME! You out here looking like some dumb little girl in love with some bitch—"

I choked on a sob, my whole chest aching.

Hearing him talk about me like this? Hearing him talk about Ren like this?

It was too much.

Tears fell fast. I covered my face, my whole body shaking.

"You disgust me, Yanna." His voice dripped with venom. "I didn't raise you like this."

And that's when it happened.

A blur. A shift in the air. A sudden movement too fast to process.

Before I could even register it—

Ren came out of nowhere.

One second, I was crying.

The next?

My father was on the ground.

Pinned.

Ren's knee was digging into his back, one hand gripping the back of his neck, her other arm twisted around his.

Her voice was low. Dangerous. Deadly.

"Watch your fucking mouth."

I gasped, my heart lurching into my throat.

"What the hell—?!" My father struggled, but Ren didn't budge. Didn't even flinch.

"You can talk crazy about me all you want," Ren muttered, her voice calm but dripping with something dangerous. "But you ain't never gon' talk to her like that again."

I stood there, frozen, in shock.

Breaking it up, i dont want the chapters too long