Chapter 9

ABHI

I messed up... I messed up everything.

Sitting in my office, I had been cursing myself the whole morning. There was lots of work to do, but I couldn't concentrate. All I could think of was Aadhi's tear-filled eyes.

It all started the day we went on that trip with my friends. She got close to Harsha on that day. She got hurt on that day, and Harsha was always there for her. But I wasn't.

That thought was killing me inside. I wanted to be the one to be with her all the time. I want to make her laugh... I mean, a genuine one, like yesterday when she was watching that movie.

I wanted to make her happy, but all I did was hurt her. I felt guilty after what happened on that day. I was not there to catch her, even though I knew how afraid she was.

For a second, I was irritated about how long she was taking to make that jump, so I moved away for a second. That was my worst mistake ever.

I should have been there to help her come out of the water, or I should have not let her jump. I thought that everyone was having fun, so why not her?

Instead, it turned into my worst nightmare. I was not able to look her in the eyes after that. The thought that I was not there to save her at that time made me want to kill myself.

After that day I was not able to be myself. All I could think about was her.

I wanted to correct that misunderstanding between us but I didn't know how. I was afraid of what she must have been thinking about me all this time.

But I mustered up the courage and decided to talk to her. When I was about to leave the office, Nija called me.

"Hey, Abhi." He and Harsha were waiting for me

"Hey... Are you waiting for me?"

"Yep... Can you give us a ride?" Nija asked me.

"Okay... But where?"

"Just on the way to your home. Nija wants to buy something for Siva," Harsha replied.

I looked at him questioningly.

Did I forget something? Is it her birthday? No... Then what's the occasion?

He scratched the back of his head, looking a little embarrassed.

"We got into a little fight yesterday, so I want to get her something." He smiled sheepishly.

I chuckled and motioned them to get inside the car.

On our way, I asked Nija, "What are you going to buy for Siva?"

"I don't know, just drop us there. We will figure it out."

"We?" Harsha questioned him.

"Hmmm, yes,we. Why did you think I asked you to accompany me? Help me choose something and stop me from returning home with empty hands."

We both looked at him confused. What was he talking about?

He rolled his eyes and said, "I don't know what to get her. I searched every shop but I didn't know what to get and finally, I would have ended up not getting anything.

That is why, my friend, you are here with me today.

I chuckled and Harsha sighed in disbelief.

While driving I saw a flower shop and had an idea. I stopped the car in front of the shop and decided to buy some flowers for Aadhi.

I asked the shopkeeper to give me some lilies.

"Is it for Aadhi?" Harsha enquired.

"Yeah," I said, smiling.

"Get her roses. She doesn't like lilies," he suggested.

That was it. My mood soured. Suddenly I felt like I didn't want to get anything. But of course, I bought the roses and I threw them away when they both left.

I got home late, not wanting to face her in this mood. I know it wasn't her fault but I couldn't change how I felt. I don't know why, but I always showed her the worst part of me.

Aadhi and Bharathi were watching a movie. I sat beside them with my dinner. I was not really into the film.

I was thinking about how it came to be that I didn't know what she liked but he did.

Did you ever try talking to her nicely? I mentally slapped myself.

I should have at least tried to get to know her. I couldn't keep blaming her when the mistake was mine.

I turned to look at her. I saw her laughing... Genuinely... Not a care in the world. At that moment, I felt that the world was against me.

All I could see was...her laugh when she was with Harsha on that beach. It was playing in front of my eyes like a movie.

That's it!I snapped.

"Will you please shut up?" I shouted, unable to control my emotions.

They were both shocked.

After that, I did something stupid. You can't even call it stupid. There is no word to describe what I did. I know it was so silly of me. I threw the plate away.

It just flew and went down in front of her with all the food scattering everywhere. I don't know what got into me. I just focused all my anger on that plate.

When I went back to my room, I realized what I had done. It didn't even make sense to me. She probably would have thought it was about the food and she must have hated me for that.

I punched the wall with frustration. I wanted to correct it. My temper had got the best of me. But how? I had no idea... It was so stressful.

A knock on the door.

"Come in."

Nija came inside. The look on his face told me what he was going to ask.

Oh God, no.I sighed.

"What is it?" he asked. There it is, the scariest question ever.

I decided to pretend like nothing was going on. "What?"

"Spit it out," he ordered with a meaningful look.

"I don't know what you are talking about." I tried to be as cool as possible.

"I know something is bothering you. So, spit it out, so that I can give you a piece of my mind, like always."

"How did you know something was bothering me? And how the hell could you say it's my fault? Maybe it's not, huh?"

"I know that something is bothering you because you were brooding all this time in your office and I can surely say that whatever it is, it's your fault because I am your best friend.

So tell me what you did this time."

I sighed in defeat. He could always read me like a book and he was right. It was my fault.

"I messed up," I sighed.

"I know that," he chuckled.

That earned him a glare from me.

"Okay, okay... Tell me what's wrong."

I couldn't hide anything from him. So I told him what happened and how I felt from the beginning.

He just stared at me. I didn't understand why he was staring at me like that.

"What?"

He started laughing.

"Why are you laughing? Do you think this is funny?" I asked him, annoyed.

"You are in love."

I was shocked to hear this. I didn't know what to say.

"Finally, our Abhi is in love. I have to tell this to Sivani" he says, laughing.

"No, I am not. I just... I just like her. You can't tell this to anyone," I warned him.

"Why not? This is good news." He shrugged.

"No, you can't. But first, tell me how to solve this. It's like she is always seeing me angry and honestly, I rarely get angry, you know that. I don't why I am behaving like this around her."

"Because you are in lov—" I stopped him with my glare.

"Okay, fine." He lifted his hands up.

"You just lov—I mean,likeher in your own way. You just need to talk to her. Tell her how you feel."

"What do you mean 'talk to her'? By now she must be furious about what I did. What if she didn't want to talk or something? What if she tells me to get lost?

What if she doesn't want to talk to me ever again? It will hurt me."

"Yep... It will hurt. I won't say she won't do that."

"Dude, you are not helping."

He chuckled and said, "I said I didn't think that she would talk to you without a fight, but I didn't say that she won't forgive you at all.

But for that my friend... you need to earn her forgiveness.

"By doing what?"

"Yeah, ask me everything. Do you want me to do it for you?" he asked annoyingly. "Figure it out, buddy. She is your wife. She is not going anywhere without you."

He patted my shoulder and left the room.

I don't know why, but hearing the wordsshe is not going anywhere without youmade me happy.

After thinking long, I decided to talk to her tonight no matter what. I prepared myself to apologize to her even if I had to do it a thousand times or more.

When I reached home I went to my room expecting to see Aadhi. But she was not there. I searched for her in the kitchen, but she was not there either.

I searched for her everywhere, but she was nowhere to be found.

When my mom saw me searching, she asked, "What are you searching for?"

"Umm... Where is Aadhi?"

"She went to stay with her mother for this weekend. Didn't she tell you?"

No, she didn't. But I couldn't say that to my mother. So I pretended to check my phone for messages.

"Yeah, there are missed calls from her and a message. I didn't check because I was busy." I tried to speak as convincingly as possible.

I turned to return to my room but then turned back to Mom and asked, "Did she tell you when she would be returning?"

"She said on Sunday evening. But I told her to stay as many days as she wanted. So, maybe she will be back after one or more days."

I really wanted to ask her,What? Mom, why? Did you really have to go and say that to her? What if she decided to stay for a month?But I remained silent and returned to my room.

Now that Aadhi was not around I felt like something was missing. I missed just looking at her face.

I used to watch her when she was not paying attention. I would see her smile; watch her cooking, watch her getting annoyed by my actions... Of course, she didn't know.

It was kind of fascinating for me to watch her doing things. I missed her already. How was I going to spend this weekend without her?

Aadhi, please come back soon... I want to talk to you... I want to see you...

Picturing her face in my mind, I closed my eyes to sleep.

***

It was Sunday evening. I was waiting for her to return.

I even refused to go out with my family, giving a silly excuse, "What if she returns and no one is home and goes back again?"

My mom laughed, but she understood and didn't ask me anything further.

So, there I was on the couch, facing the doorway and expecting her to walk in at any moment. I was carelessly changing the channel on the television without really watching it.

I even rehearsed what to say to her when she came.

While waiting for her, I fell asleep on the couch. It was my mom who woke me up. "You are back?" I asked her sleepily and checked the time. It was 7 p.m.

Part of me knew that she was not going to come that day. But part of me wondered,what if?

"Where is Aadhi? Didn't you tell me she would be coming back today? What if she is stuck somewhere on the way? I think I should go and check for her..."

I continued to ramble and started walking out without giving her a chance to say something back.

She laughed and stopped me in my tracks. "No hurry, my son. She is not going to be here for another two days."

"What?" I said, shock clear on my face.

The look on my face must have shown them how disappointed I was to hear that.

My sister started laughing. My father and mother joined her.

I glared at them. My mom stopped laughing and said teasingly, "She asked me if she could stay longer, and I said yes. Maybe she texted you while you were busy sleeping."

I rolled my eyes and started walking toward my room.

"Don't you want dinner?" my sister yelled.

I just shook my head, went back to my room, and slumped onto my bed in disappointment.

***

I had been pacing around inside my office on a Monday morning like a crazy person. I didn't know what to do, but it was killing me inside not seeing her. I knew she was doing it on purpose.

I knew what I did was wrong, but how could she not even give me a chance to explain?

She didn't even ask me what was wrong!

She just decided to avoid me as long as possible. At first, I wanted to know how long she was going to pull this stunt, so I decided not to disturb her even though I missed her, I was losing my patience.

She was driving me crazy.

That's it. I have given her enough time and space.

So I took my phone from the desk and called her.

No answer...

I tried again... Again no answer.

So I texted her. Maybe she would at least see my message.

Abhi

Aadhi, when are you coming back?

A minute passed. Seen... but no reply.

Abhi

I know you are reading my message, so tell me.

Again no reply.

Abhi

Please Aadhi tell me when you are coming back. I really want to talk to you.

Still no reply. Frustrated by this, I was going to throw my phone away but suddenly I had an idea. I looked at my phone, smirking, and sent the last message.

Abhi

I am coming to get you. Be ready... 😈