Chapter 30

CLEMENTINE

As I stand in front of the only family I have left, I think, ~Please, don’t reject me. Please.~

I no longer feel a connection with Helia, which means I’ll die for good if anyone kills me right now.

Not that I would let them. Thank God my witch side is still here.

I started to walk slowly toward everyone, but Alex and Ivan back away, which tells me that they’re either scared or don’t want to be close to me anymore. This brings tears to my eyes, but I don’t let them fall; my ego is too big to cry in front of anyone.

I don’t like how Ivan and Alex have suddenly become “anyone.” But the fear and hurt in their eyes tells me that nothing will ever be the same.

“I-Ivan,” I stutter. I begin to walk his way again, but he holds his hand up, stopping me. “Ivan, please.”

He shakes his head, a look of disgust on his face. My heart breaks.

“Alex?” I say, turning to my brother, my protector. He keeps his face down, not wanting to look at me.

Since no one wants to talk, I decide to speak up. “I-I couldn’t tell you.” I can’t control my tears anymore. “When I learned that I’m also a witch, I hated myself. I wished that I could just die, but I cannot change who I am. If I was not a witch, I would have died by now. My magic saved me.”

Ivan’s and Alex’s faces do not change. They wear the same look of betrayal, hurt, and hatred, though I’m sure that hatred is not directed at me but rather at the witch inside of me.

I know they could never hate me. Ivan is my mate, and Alex is my brother.

Right?

Suddenly, my father walks over and hugs me. “I’m sorry you had to go through this alone,” he whispers.

I nod and continue my speech. “That witch, Carmela, was the reason I discovered that Sofia was not my biological mother. Then I met my real mother, and…and it turned out that she was a hybrid. A witch and a werewolf… I did not choose to be a witch.”

After a long minute passes with no response from anyone, I plead, “Please, say something!”

“You lied!” Alex yells suddenly, but I’m more scared by Ivan’s silence. “You lied to all of us! When werewolves near the border were being killed by witches, you knew about it, and you did not even do anything! You are a liar, Clementine! You are one of them!”

Tears run down my brother’s face as he says, “You didn’t tell me, and I’m your brother!”

“I didn’t tell you because of what you’re saying right now!” I yell. “The look you gave me when you saw me perform magic is the reason I never wanted you to know. I was afraid you were going to hate me!”

“And this is better? At least, I would’ve learned what you are from you!”

All of the sudden, a voice yells, “ENOUGH!”

Ivan is fuming, and I can tell that his wolf is trying to surface.

~I’m going to die today.~

My mate walks over, takes me by the neck, and pins me against a tree. His bright-yellow eyes look at me with hurt.

He tightens his hold, and I start to feel dizzy.

“Ivan! Calm down!” my father says, but Ivan pays no attention to him.

“You betrayed me,” he whispers, his voice cracking.

“I-Ivan…if you kill me now, I w-will die forever. Helia is n-not here,” I gasp from lack of oxygen.

He quickly lets go of my neck but keeps towering over me.

I cough, holding my neck.

~Come back, Helia, please.~

“You lied to my face while I told you about my first mate!”

“I am nothing like her!” I protest.

“I do not care! You are still a witch!” he barks, making me flinch.

“I did not choose to be a witch,” I say softly, turning my gaze to the ground.

“You did not choose to be a witch, but you chose to use your powers!”

“So, you would rather I have died by those hunters?” I yell, standing up.

“It’d be better than you dying by my hands!” he bites back.

Upon hearing that, my heart breaks even more.

I look into the eyes I loved so much. “I can’t believe you said that,” I whisper. “Ivan…I’m still your mate. I am—”

I put my hand on his chest, but he removes it and says, “Do not touch me!”

“Fine! Then kill me!” I say without fear.

“Ivan! Don’t listen to her,” Alex says, panicking.

All of the sudden, I feel a rush inside me, and my eyes turn bright orange. Helia is back.

“You waited too long,” I say, flashing my bright eyes at him.

“I wasn’t going to kill you, but…,” he starts, and I know what’s coming next. “I, Ivan Vasiliev, reject you as your mate.”

With that, he turns around and leaves.

I wait for a few seconds for the news to strike me, but nothing happens.

~Helia, why am I not feeling anything?~

~“I am protecting you. I am taking all the pain, Clem.”~

~No! Don’t do that. I can take it.~

She doesn’t reply.

“Alex…” I walk toward my brother, and this time he doesn’t back away. I take his hands in mine, tears running down my face. “Please, don’t hate me.”

He hesitates, then says, “I love you, Clementine—so much. You are my sister, and I know…I know you did not choose to be a witch. I know you are a good person, and I could never hate you.

“But…I can’t…I can’t have you in my pack when everyone hates witches. Just like we discovered the truth, they will. I cannot stand against the pack, Clem, and they will try to kill you.” His voice cracks at the end.

“I-I get it,” I say, looking at the ground.

“You should go. Find somewhere where you can be who you are,” he says, making my insides hurt.

I guess Helia can only take so much pain.

Still teary, Alex says, “I am sorry about Ivan. Are you okay?”

“I am. Helia took all the pain of the rejection.”

He suddenly hugs me and sobs, “I am sorry, Clementine. I love you. Forgive me.”

“I love you, Alex…and I forgive you.”

After he leaves to return to his pack, something comes over me. I don’t feel anything at all. When my father and Carl approach wearing matching somber expressions, I say, “Don’t. Don’t pity me, Father.”

“I just… I can imagine what you must be feeling. Losing your mate…”

“I didn’t lose my mate, Dad. He lost me. He rejected me. He lost the respect of the most powerful creature in the world.”

“Clementine…are you…are you okay?” He looks at me suspiciously, probably wondering why I am being so arrogant and mean.

“I guess when Helia took my pain, she also took my humanity,” I say nonchalantly.

He sighs. “Where are you going to go?”

“I don’t know—why? You suddenly care?”

“Don’t do this, Clem,” he pleads. “Helia, bring her back!”

“Leave, Father,” I say firmly.

I start to walk away, but Carl trails after me. I don’t want to speak to him, but he doesn’t stop following me.

“Go away,” I spit.

“No, I’m not going to do that, Clem.”

“Go before I fucking kill you!”

“No.”

I growl and continue walking, not paying him any attention.

“Is Helia okay?” he asks after a few minutes.

“Why do you care?” I ask.

“You’re my friend, Clem.”

“No, I’m not. Go away.”

“Fine, but I will see you soon, okay?”

I don’t answer him. I just leave.

***

As I walk down a human road, I wonder where the hell I’m going. The only person I can think to stay with is my mother, but I don’t want to remain in Big Bear Lake. Too many memories, too much hurt.

Yes, Helia took some of my pain and humanity, but I still have some. Enough that I would feel bad seeing a hurt child, but not enough that I would feel bad seeing a dead person.

I don’t know if I’ll ever get my humanity back because Helia isn’t speaking to me. I wouldn’t be surprised if she hates me too because we lost our mate. But I know she’ll eventually come around.

It’s dark and quiet outside. At this hour, there are no cars driving, and all the lights are off in the houses I pass.

I think about how this is the first time I’ve been in a human territory. I’m glad that I look human, but I’m sad that I’ll have to hide my magic and phoenix powers. I cannot be exposed.

These thoughts are interrupted by a voice. Someone crying.

I walk toward the voice and see a small baby wrapped up in a gold and red blanket. No one is around. It’s like her parents just dropped her on the side of the road.

My first instinct is to keep walking, but the little voice inside me—the little humanity that I have left—does not let me. Instead, I pick the baby up, and she instantly stops crying. I look at her blanket and see the initials AA.

I can smell something different about her. She’s not human, but I don’t know exactly what she is.

I guess we’ll find out together.

***

^EPILOGUE^

“Momma, I’m hungry!” my five-year-old daughter whines.

Even though I found her abandoned on the streets, I love Arabella as my own. She is the person I love most in the world, and I will protect her forever.

“Here you go, baby,” I say, giving her a small cup full of blood.

When I found her, I did not know what she is. Now I know that she is part vampire, but I can feel something else too… Maybe she’s part human or part werewolf.

Every once in a while, I wonder who her real parents are. Vampires cannot conceive unless both of the parents are hybrids or one of them is human. But I wonder more how they could’ve abandoned her like that.

“Thank you, Mommy,” she replies, giving me thumbs up.

After I left Big Bear Lake five years ago, I never looked back, and no one ever looked for me. I don’t know anything about my home, and I don’t want to know.

Luckily for me, Helia moved on from Ivan, but she never fully returned my humanity. She’s never been the same since Ivan’s rejection, and I’m forever thankful that she took that pain from me.

I’m also thankful Helia likes Arabella; otherwise, I don’t know what she would do.

All of the sudden, my phone rings. My mother.

Before I left Big Bear Lake for good, I took my new baby to my mother. I told her where I was planning to go, and using her magic, she helped me register Arabella and get her a passport. Now my daughter and I live in France, but my mother still calls frequently.

“Hey, Mom,” I answer, smiling.

“Hello, baby. How are you? How is my little girl?”

“We are good. We miss you.”

“I miss you so much. Aren’t you thinking of visiting?”

“You know I won’t ever come back.”

“I know…but I really would like to see you.”

“Why don’t you come?” I ask.

“You know…I have work, and everything’s changed here.”

“I understand.” I pause. “How’s Father?”

“He is good…coming secretly to me every night.” She giggles.

I laugh. “At least some things haven’t changed.”

“Yeah…he is such a sweetheart.”

“Indeed, he is.”

I hear some background noise, and then my mother says, “Look, I will call you later, okay?”

“Okay. See you!”

I hang up and find Arabella, who is drawing. I smile. She loves to draw, and she is pretty good at it. I am so proud of her.

“Bella!” I call.

“Yes, Momma?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”