Part forty five

Monae's POV

Cold winds rushed in all directions around us, the moon giving us enough light for me to see Michy and find out he's walking to me with pleading eyes.

"I can't!" I shouted inching away from him although be was only steps away from, I turned my back to him and wrapped my hands around myself to sheild me from the cold breeze.

I then looked around me when I heard the rustling of leaves. How did I end up here on a cliff surrounded by thick trees enough to make forests stretching to ten countries?

I remeber it had not been so long since I got into bed after waking, then how did I get here?

It is definitely a dream cause I haven't seen Michy in what feels like ages--

I felt him wrap his arms protectively and possessively around mine and his head in the crook of my neck as he hugged me tightly to him. "Please don't go, don't leave me." His voice was below a whisper yet I could hear the desperation, misery and beseech in it like the last time.

Remembering what brought about the last time, I felt anger bubbling inside and his touch that seconds ago had sweet effect on me now felt foreign and suffocating.  "I'm sorry Michele, I have to let you go. I should have known you weren't the one for me—"

"I am! I'm always going to be the one for you, you are made for me and I am for you—"

I pushed hom, covering my ears and yelled at him. "Imogen is the one for you, I should have known better than get involved with a man who's already taken."

"Finally!" Imogen out of nowhere exclaimed as she walked towards us, clapping her hands. "Glad you finally realized the truth, I thought you were going to be forever dumb and not see how perfect we are for each other."

"I don't love you Imogen and I never will, even my dead body won't accept you, ever!"

"I know, I know darl, you don't have to waste your breath. I'm very aware you're only infatuated with her that's why you're saying all this." She said softly as if she was speaking to a child. "But now I'm here to make everything right and take back what's mine!"

Her eyes turned a murderous shade when she turned to me, I gulped seeing that and began to take steps back in fear. This was a new Imogen I want nothing to do with, the way her eyes are gazing at me as if tearing me into pieces is enough to send mw six feets under.

Seeing I was walking back, she also walked till she was almost closing the gap between us. Out of fear, I continued walking without looking behind me.

"Baby don't take any steps, you're nearing the edge!"

I looked over at where Michy just shouted and saw him fighting with three men. He was trying so hard to wade them off but he wasn't successful enough and before I could look away. I felt an excruciating pain under my scalp, "ouch!"

It was then I realized Imogen had grabbed me by my hair and was pulling me towards the edge of the cliff.

Being faced with death, I don't where this adrenaline came from but it rushed through me, giving me the strength to bite her as hard as I could.

"You bitch!" Imogen cried out in pain and staggered away from me, holding her hand that most likely was bleeding.

In fact she was bleeding, I felt the taste of her blood in my mouth and it repulsed me. I bent down amd forced myself to gag only to have someone pull me up and slap me hard across the face multiple times.

"You'll know today what it feels like to want someone and never have him."

She dragged me to the edge and pushed me off. "Bitch! I hope your wretched soul rots in the hottest part of help!"

"Michy!"

"Naaeeeeeeeee!!!!"

"Heeeeeeeelp!"

Suddenly everything began to get black, the shrill voice which i recognized as mine rang with great distress in the darkness that enveloped me. I woke up with a start, my hands, legs and whole body shook violently as I shot my eyes open and came into contact with the semi dark ceiling. I fell back into bed and in sync touched my forehead that was drenched with sweat, and like my whole body, the cover I was snuggled into was a little wet.

God, not these nightmares again.

In a flash, I heard shuffling from beside me and a pair of hands pull me into them. Tensing up, I relaxed when I recognized the now familiar scent of the person.

“Shh, its okay. Everything is fine it was just a dream.”

Those words were supposed to comfort me and assure me everything I saw and felt were only imaginative visions that were stored in dreamland, having no contact with the physical realm yet it didnt. I found myself snuggling deeper into her chest which was like a safe haven and sounds of sobs escaped from my lips as tears streamed down my cheeks.

“There, there, it's alright, everything is fine.” Her hands running through my hair in a soothing way did nothing to alleviate what I was feeling inside, instead it forced torrent of tears to flow.

A minute passed into two and two into three till I lost track of time, I laid in her arms and cried. I cried because I was sick and tired of these nightmares that chase out my sleep, the only thing that helps me to escape from reality, giving my mind and soul rest.

At least that was what I thought till these nightmares started. Horrendous nightmares involving Michy and Imogen who is always hell bent on wiping my existence from the face of the earth. But I thought I was free from them!

I was supposed to find solace after leaving thier lives and everything I ever shared with them, heal from this pain and move on then afterwards have the will power to look back and pat myself on the back for being able to overcome this great hurdle yet all I've got after walking away is nightmares that always reminds me of the reason why I left and the reason why I should have never gotten involved with Michy in the first place.

He wasn't the one for me, he never was. I should have known better, the red flags were always visible. Clear enough for me to see but the bliss and tantalizing happiness that I experienced when I was with him blinded me and got me carried away that I chose not to see it and settle for someone who wasn't mine.

A man who was more comfortable with keeping secrets away from me that involved my adopted sister whom I considered as my blood relation but only turned around to be a snake, no chameleon because it didn't take too long for her to change to her true colour and show me who she truly was.

Unfortunately, the stupid me knew who she was, M ichy constantly told me  but I convinced myself Imogen had changed for the best. I allowed what I hoped and desired for to cloud my sense of judgement and I'm now paying fof it.

For once I'll agree with him, I am too naive to the point of stupidity and if I am ever able to collect my broken self and move on, I'll know better than trust someone who was once an enemy--

“My God!” Jozelynn pulled my head away from her to meet her gaze, my head pounded at the sudden movement which got worse when the She switched on the beside lamp. I tried hard not to shut my eyes as the pain doubled while she frantically felt my face with both eyes and hand then drew it back, “you're running a very high temperature!” She shrieked in alarm.

I ignored the pain in my head that felt as if someone was hammering my head with both hands and quickly grabbed her hand begkre she could climb out of the bed and worry herself more than she should given her condition.

“No it's alright,” I assured her, masking my face with a small smile that was too forced even she saw it.

“You're everything but alright? No, you're not, just feel--”

“Don't get worked up Lynn please.” Although my voice came out low, there was still this imploring tone loaded in it. “I'm fine, I'll just get some sleep and I'll be better.”

“Why don't you ever listen to me?” She started, “you always tell me you'll be better after resting yet day in the day out your health keeps dwindling,” in the not so bright light emitting from the lamp, I saw her eyes getting glossy, “do you want to lie on your death bed before you admit you need help?” her lips quivered and before I knew Lynn was crying.

I felt guilty seeing her cry, I won't blame it on the pregnancy homornes but myself. I was the reason she was shedding tears when she was supposed to be in a happy mood all the time for the sake of the baby. Is this really how I want to repay someone who only cares about me?

“I'm sorry.” I quickly said, taking her hands in mine. “I didn't mean for you to cry, its like almost all my life in at the mercy of people. When I get myself in any trouble or bad situation it's people who get me out of it, I'm tired of that. I want to do something for myself for once without relying on anyone and being a bother--”

“I understand you perfectly, I've been in situations like that myself but do you know sometimes it is okay to let people in and take care of you, when you're weak to do so? It doesn't mean you're weak or useless, it means you're human and any person who's also human won't find it a problem to help you knowing they're helping a friend.

“You might not know this and it will be kinda weird to hear tbis but Drake and I see you as a family, someone we have blood relations with and we will go to any end of the earth to help you on these dark ans gloomy days--”

“I appreciate it but--”

“No buts, please let me take care of you even if this once.” She pleaded looking at me with puppy eyes, “it will make me so happy.”

A smile crept on my lips and I nodded the blew out a breath, “okay fine, do as you wish.” The words were barely out when she hugged me.

“Thank you so much, you don't know how happy this makes me.”

*******

I heard a gasp from beside me and from the corner of my eye I saw Jozelynn look at me like she didn't believe what I just said and clapsed her hand over her mouth, switching her eyes on Drake.

“Are you sure about this?” He asked and persisted, “like very sure?”

“Yes.” I replied with an ever confident and surety voice without looking up and forced the spoon into my mouth, welcoming the fifth out of the many more to go pool of soup I've been subjected to take in, by the doctor. “I haven't been surer about anything else than this before, ever in my life.”

“And that's it?”

I swallowed and furrowing ny brows, I gave her a side glance. I'm not catching on to what she said. “What do you mean by and that's it?”

Jozelynn rolled her eyes. “Are you really going to give up every single thing amd go back to Ghana just because of this small misunderstanding?”

“Yes.” I more like stated, my voice hinting how serious I was.

“Unbelievable.” She hissed, “I can't seriously believe this, I thought you were so matured but I guess I thought wrong.”

“I don't appreciate the tone you're using on her.”

“Neither do I appreciate your support for this wrong, talk some sense into your s-- her head, let her know what she's doing is childish and--”

“Why do the need for me to do that when she has already made up her mind? You and I were both here every single time and saw what she went through. You can choose to be blind or have amnesia, I won't be a part of it. I support this decision totally not because I am angry at him but becuase staying here isn't good for her. There's always going to be a reminder of what happened everywhere she goes so she's better off far away than here--”

“We can always have her stay in any of our properties in Europe or Asia, there's the lake and beach house in Maldives, you always talk about how the sea is medicine and healing to your family or our farmhouse in Delhi where she can even practice yoga if you're so concerned about her but why Ghana?”

Throwing the question at her husband, she faced him with a daring look as she waited for him to answer. Drake hesitated for sometomw before opening his mouth but nothing came out.

All this while I had watched and listened to them argue about me as if I wasn't present and I feel this is the right time for me not to only add to it but also put an end to their banter, I appreciate their concern for. Honestly I do very much but unfortunately I don't want to hear anything about the past.

“Because I don't intend on coming back here,” answering them, I looked between them before fixing my gaze on Jozelynn, “ever, and no one can get me to change my mind or reconsider my decision. You wanted me to get up and move on right?” She nodded, opening her mouth to speak but I did before she could, I knew what she was going to say and her wish is impossible.

“Then I've come to the realization that the only way that I can move on from everything is going back to my homeland, the place where nothing will remind me of what I want to forget and never remember and I'm sorry if my decision disappointed any of you, I'm sincerely sorry.”

“Do you always have to be stubborn headed?”

“Honey, you've heard her final words what more do you want to hear?”

“I don't want to hear but rather see her and Michy getting back together. He made a mistake and he never for once denied it why then are you hardening your heart and giving him a chance to forgive him?”

“I hate to say this and cut through your dream bubble but it is impossible ans that's that so it's about time you start getting used to it.” He made for her hand but she held it up, stopping him from touching her.

“I'm disappointed in you.”

Drake is really a strange person, instead of being afraid of the glare and murderous eyes his wife is giving him, he's unfazed and beaming. “ I love you too.”

“I never said I loved you.”

“You don't need to say it, I know you do and I love you twice as much as you do.”

“Aargh--”

I had to tear my eyes away from them when they got lost in their world and started kissing.

Although I was happy they had made up and not fight because of me, it was painful for me to watch or even look at them. I felt stirring in my heart and despite myself, I missed Michy and low key wishes even we could be like Drake and Jozelynn and put everything between us.

But no, the conflict lying between us runs deeper than the petty banter between them and why should I even wish for that when I want to forget about him---

“With that being settled, I'll make arrangements for your return to Ghana.” At the sound of his voice, I looked up at them and saw they were now in my world. Jozelynn was busy on Drake's phone while he looked at her.

“Thank you, I'll be….” with his index finger on his lips and his eyes wide, he signalled me to just before I could continue with what I wanted to say.

“Hello.” He said to the person I knew was on the phone judging by his actions

******

Please Lord, please don't let him come here.

I silently prayed as I shook my leg nervously. Previously I couldn't stand the nightmares and the fear it gave me but this fear of  Michy coming over here and finding out where I've been all this while will very soon send me to my early grave before he even gets here.

Never did I want him to find out about me that's why I made them promise me never to reveal my whereabouts to him but it seems I have given it out, again because of my stupidity.

“Seriously Nae take a chill pill and relax, he won't find you.”

“I wish your words can get me to relax but unfortunately its doing opposite of that.”

“Thats understandable, very, very but seriously relax. Michy won't find you here, he didn't recognize it was you and I'm sure he didn't even hear your voice.”

Jozelynn tried to reason with me, so hard we all  could even feel she was rather convincing herself rather than me.

“Next joke please.” Even in my nervous state, I couldn't help but be sarcastic, like really? Michy knows me more than I know myself and I won't be surprised if he's parking his car in their driveway or worse, barging into the house as we speak. “We all know Michy unlike me isn't stupid, he heard it and he's coming for me I know it and so do you so please stop giving me these false hopes.” My fear was gradually penting up to anger and I'm afraid I'll blow up if she or Drake says any word more.

I'm getting angry at myself not them--

“Now that's my girl.”

At the sound of that voice, I tensed up. My heart acceleration increased abnormally and I shut my eyes tightly, closing them and wishing with my all this isn't true but only a dream.

“Michele.”

Sadly, it isn't and my greatest fear at the moment has come through.. Now can the floor upon up and swallow me?

*************************