0.5

William

The past few days have been rough since my grandparents were still over. They usually stay for a week or so because they live so far away.

My grandma always makes enough food to feed an army and expects me to eat it all and want much more. Also, it was hard sneaking around to purge because my entire family has been breathing down my neck since what happened when I took a walk.

I didn't know if I was happy or not that my grandparents left. I was happy I could go back to not eat but sad because I don't get to see them as often as I'd like.

My stomach grumbled as I gulped down the rest of my water, begging for something other than a piece of bread, water, or string cheese. I needed to go back to my schedule of just drinking water constantly and eat only if I felt light headed or dizzy. Sorta fasting,  but I'm still eating, but very little. Only a light snack or two that'll make my stomach stop growling every few minutes when water doesn't satisfy me.

My plan is to just drink a lot of water since I heard it helps you lose weight. Lucille did a pagent in the summer and for two weeks, only drank water and healthy meals. She said she slimmed down quite a bit. Maybe I can do that.

All day, I've just been downing water every moment I got to. It wasn't easy in the morning, but as the day went on and my hunger grew, water became easier to just chug.

At the end of the day, I stood in front of my mirror, debating if I should look to see if my stomach has thinned down. I don't think it's a 'one day only' thing. But I've peed a lot and I think that helped.

I lift up my shirt, widening my eyes at my stomach. I looked bigger than I did when I ate that speghetti! My stomach stuck out, and I looked like I was pregnant.

Was this supposed to happen? Did the water do this? Did I not throw up all of dinner? Did the bread make me puff out?

I thought water was supposed to help... Maybe it takes a few days  for it to work. I usually only drink water, but I didn't fully rely on it to help me get slimmer.

I only drank it to take the hunger away and because it was 0 calories.

My hand pressed against my enlarged stomach, imagining how it would look if it was completely flat. How my body would look without any fat on it.

It's been about a month since I've stepped on the scale. I am honestly have become scared of it because of the numbers. But I don't know if all my hard work is paying off if I don't check.

Last time I weight myself I was a little ovef 120 pounds, which I suppose isn't much for my height and age.

(I researched it and it says 140-170 is a healthy weight for 5'8, depending on your figure. If you look it up yourself for a male, I just rounded the numbers up)

My body felt like it was shaking as I inches towards the scale that was in the corner of my bathroom. I keep it underneath my sink because I despise it.

I held my breath as I stepped onto it, watching as the numbers went up from 0. Squeezing my eyes shut, I waited to hear the little beep it made when it caculated my weight.

It felt like hours as I stood there, digging my nails into my palms as I waited.

A small deep came from the device below me, making my eyes shoot open.

114.3

That's it? Only a bit over 5 pounds in the past month? Seriously?

I scoff, stepping off the scale. This is bullshit, I should be lower than that.

Shoving the device back underneath my sink, I felt disappointed in myself. You probably shouldn't have ate a second slice of bread and just had drank water. Maybe you would be skinnier then. You're going to get fatter.

Maybe I just need to do some excersize. I've been sitting around all day, just watching movies since it was a Saturday.

"Can I take a walk?" I asked my mom with a smile, hoping it would convince her to allow me after what had happened last time.

She looks up from her book, studying me for a moment, "be back before 11:45 or you'll be grounded until you graduate."

I send my mom another cheerful smile before I nod, bouncing towards the door.

It was only 10:50, so I had an hour to walk. Maybe I could go on a run... There was a skate park connected to a small playground a little less than a mile away, so maybe I could walk there.

The parks were always crowded during the day, so I avoided them until night. I love socializing with people and all, but I like socializing with only people I know or want to know.

I felt relieved once I reached the park, thankful no one was there. I mean, who would? It's cold out, it's past 11, and it's a skate park.

The wind blew harshly in my face as I walked towards the equipment, admiring the slopes and rails.

I haven't skated in years. Not that I was good at it or anything

It was just fun messing around on a skateboard.

Leaning against a slope, I scanned the empty area. Skating must be fun here, with all the structures.

I snap my head towards the gate at the sound of it shutting. Is someone here? Was that the wind? Yeah, it was just the wind, maybe I didn't close the gate all the way.

"Didn't think I'd see you here."

My head whips quickly towards the voice, my heart bet beginning to pound against my chest.

I relaxed a bit once I saw it was just that Nick guy from a bit ago.

"Didn't mean to scare you." He chuckles, pushing his foot against the ground, moving slowly on a skateboard.

"You skate?"

Nicholas scoffs playfully, shaking his head, "no, I suck at it. Its just fun to try."

"Why are you out so late?" I asked with a raised brow.

Nicholas shrugs as he looked up at the night sky, studying the stars for a moment. "Just felt like it... You?"

"I needed some fresh air."

His hazel eyes met mine, a smile appearing on his face. "Understandable. I come out here and look at aliens."

My eyes widen, "aliens?!"

Nicholas chuckles as his eyes trained back on the night sky, "yeah, they're somewhere out there. I just know it."

I furrow my brows together at his strange comment. Aliens? I've never really considered thinking if they were real or not. "Maybe."

I looked up at the starry sky, studying the glowing dots that were scattered in the darkness. It was such a gorgeous sight.

"Wanna try?"

My eyes shifted back to Nicholas, who was holding up his skate board. I quickly shake my head. That would not end well.

"Hm, okay." Nick mumbles, setting the board back down. "I think aliens are looking down at everyone and the stars are their lenses."

I bit my lip as I thought about the theory. This guy must like aliens.

"Maybe." I repeat with a shrug.

"Sorry if I sound weird, I just like conspiracies."

Smiling slightly, I reply, "no, you aren't weird. And if you were, that's okay." I shiver at the sudden gust of cold wind that blew.

I was only wearing a thin red long sleeve shirt and black jeans. But I always feel cold for some reason, my body is never warm.

"It's a bit chilly out." Nick commented with a small laugh, probably at the fact I was shivering. "Do you want to borrow my jacket?"

I glanced at the grey hoodie he was wearing over a thick, white long sleeve shirt. The jacket looked cozy and I bet it was warm from his body heat.

But I declined while thanking him for the offer. He hesitantly just nods at my words before his lovely eyes were glued back to the full sky.

My stomach grumbled loudly, pain pinging inside of me. I tried to ignore it, wrapping my arms around my empty stomach.

Nicholas looks at me with a curious look, "are you okay?"

No, not really. I'm starving but I don't want to eat because I will throw up or feel guilty for hours. "Yeah, of course I am."

He stares at me, scanning me. I gulp nervously at his gaze. "That didn't sound very convincing."

"You don't even know me." I didn't mean to sound harsh or snappy, the words just rushed up and were bitter. I bit the skin on the inside of my cheek, rubbing my cold hands together.

"You're right, sorry for assuming."

He was right though. I didn't sound convincing. I don't mean to ever sound unconvincing when I tell someone that I'm okay. I don't want someone to have any type of worry for me.

I didn't reply to Nicholas's response, wrapping my arms tighter around myself.

"So, uh, how has your weekend been?"

Nick shrugs at my question, "fine, just like any other weekend."

"Did you do anything?"

He pauses for a minute as if he was deep in thought. "I just baked a lot. I like baking. Oh and I cooked a lot too. I also like cooking. Oh, and I made a little bird house out of wood. Then painted it yellow and green."

His words were rushed as he spoke excitedly about what he had done.

I found it amusing in some type of way. "That's really cool. I wish I could build a bird house."

"You just need the right sized pieces and be a little crafty." Nicholas grins, flashing his perfect teeth. "What about you, how has your weekend been?"

Kinda shitty. "It's been fine. I've just been watching movies all day and ignoring my sisters."

"Are siblings really that annoying?"

I shrug, thinking about my 4 sisters that drive my absolutely nuts. "Sometimes, but I wouldn't be the same without them." Nicholas hums in interest as he nodded. "Do you know what time it is?"

He looked down at his wrist, a watch on it. "It's just past 11:30, why?"

Oh shit. It's going to take me roughly 10 minutes to get back home in time or else my mom would kill me.

"Oh. I need to go before my mom gets mad." I quickly spoke, pushing myself off the wall. I can't believe I was talking and staring at the stars for nearly half an hour. It felt like only a few minutes. "I'll see you around, right?"

Nicholas nods, the same charming smile on his face. "Do you want me to walk with you? I think my mom would want me home sometime soon as well. And we're walking the same way."

Company on the walk home sounded nice. It would make me not as nervous that I was running out of time before I got home.

I nodded, "that would be nice."

Damn, I didn't realize how short I was until I stood near Nicholas. I obviously noticed how tall he was when I saw him for the first time, but I completely forgot about his height.

I was tempted to ask him, assuming he was over 6 foot since he was about a head above me. Would that be weird to ask? He probably gets it all the time though. I don't want to annoy him with the question.

"I'm sorry for asking, but what's your height?"

I glanced up at Nick, suprised by the question. I swear that he read my mind.

"I'm uh, 5 foot 8... And a half."

His eyes widened as he stared at me, "really?"

"Maybe a quarter..."

Nicholas's eyes widened a bit more as he scanned my figure, "dang. You're half a foot shorter than me."

So he's 6"2... Interesting.

"You're just tall though, I'm normal height." I insisted with a convincing smile, laughing softly at how ridiculous I sounded. Nick just laughs with me, shaking his head. "I'm still growing."

"Are you now?"

I hum while nodding in determination, "yep. I'm going to reach 6 foot sometime soon." Nicholas scoffs before he laughs at my prediction.

"Maybe you'll get to 5"8 and a half one day."

I wanted to smack him, but I resisted the urge to as I just laughed, my stomach begining to ache at how much I had been laughing.

"Hopefully."

We contiued to keep up with an interesting, amusing conversation as we walked, not worrying about how loud we were laughing or how late it was.

Unfortunately, my street sign came in view and our conversation stopped once we both spotted it. A disappointed atmosphere instantly floated in the air.

"Well, I guess we're here..."

Nicholas sheepishly smiles as he nods, "I guess... Hey, uh... Nevermind."

I knit my brows together, "what is it?"

"Can I get your number?"

I was a little taken back by his question, but instantly agreed to it. I quickly gave him my number because of how little time I had left before I said good night, waking down my street.

There was a permanent smile on my face as I practically skipped merrily towards my house.

Sorry if this chapter seemed very rushed at the begining or all of it, I didn't realize how it was until I reread it but I don't really want to fill anything in.

ALSO

Water adds on weight, so his weight is lower than that, but because of all the liquids, he's very bloated.

Just for anyone who was confused or anything...

AND

The song Fix You by Coldplay, the song that fricking inspired this book, came on right as I ended the chapter and I cried... It's 5am..

Hope you're enjoying<3

~Whoops