14. Bad decisions and popcorn

My vision blurred, my head throbbed as my body gradually woke from its slumber. I threw the duvet that had stuck to my sweat-soaked skin off and stretched each of my limbs. The fluorescent numbers on my digital alarm clock read 7:30 am. Rubbing my fingers into my eyes, I reluctantly trod to the bathroom.

I shuffled through the medicine cabinet, looking for some painkillers to alleviate the ache in my skull. Not one drop of alcohol had touched my lips, yet I felt like I was suffering from a heavy hangover. I fell asleep drunk on emotions and was paying for it.

Rosie and my parents sat around the breakfast table as I walked into the kitchen. After making myself a bowl of cereal, I joined them.

My sister and my mum hunched over my sister's laptop, planning their trip up to Scotland. My father argued over the time they would need to spend in the car and the cost of petrol. He tried to convince them they would be better off flying and having Daniel drive with any belongings she couldn't fit in her bags.

Meanwhile, I perched there staring at my bowl, moving the soggy Coco Pops around with my spoon. I pushed it away and excused myself.

Without a thought for my father's reaction to my discarded food, I darted upstairs, changed into my running gear and headed out.

As soon as the soles of my trainers struck the asphalt, I bolted like a wild horse. I lost all sense of time and space with each thump of my shoes. I forced myself until my lungs burnt, my throat felt dry and my legs ached.

Coming to a stop to catch my breath, body doubled over and hands on my knees, I peered around to take in my surroundings. Subconsciously, my feet had taken me to the gravel road that led to Alec's house.

My heart pounded against my rib cage, I was desperate for water. If I just ran down this short pathway, I could ask his mother for a glass and wouldn't even have to see Alec. And if I looked around for Hope's car in his driveway, I wouldn't really be spying, would I?

I slowly took the turning to the farmhouse, walking at a leisurely pace. A few feet down, I bottled it and spun round. That happened a few times until I was back at the top, pacing the entrance to his road.

Biting my nails, I glanced towards his home and tried to ignore my need to retrace my steps.

The faint humming of a car's engine rumbled in the distance. My feet stayed glued to the spot as it approached. I spun on my heels to leave but wasn't quick enough.

Chloe's head popped out the driver side's window. "Alright, Nat? What are you doing hovering round here?" She sat back in her seat to open the packaging of a cereal bar.

"Not hovering, just out for my daily run," I hastily replied while proceeding to jog on the spot to prove my point.

Chloe's auburn cropped hair stuck up all over the place, her freckles prominent on her makeup-free face. "I thought you might be off to see Alec. Good thing you're not really. He's probably not in a state for visitors. Heavy night last night. Doubt he will be up before lunchtime," she revealed between chews.

"Oh, did he go to a party?" I returned to nervously biting my nails, waiting for her answer.

Giving me a once-over, Chloe raised her eyebrows. "Surprised you don't know or weren't there. Just at home with the new guy and Tweedledee and Tweedledum."

"Do you mean Abigail and Hope?" I snorted while screwing my nose up.

"Yeah but seriously, last night they were so annoying. Throwing themselves at the boys. And Abigail's laugh. Euh, irritating!" Her expression now sour, her eyes narrowed. "Oh Finn, your arms are so big. Oh Finn, watch me stick my boobs in your face," Chloe mocked in a high-pitched voice.

"Wow, someone's jealous!" I laughed.

Chloe stopped pulling faces and glared my way. I must have been quite a picture with my hair sticking out of my ponytail and sweat dripping along my hairline. The summer heat was starting to get to me as I idly stood next to her car and she enjoyed her air conditioning.

"Not jealous," she muttered. "Are you and Alec fighting or something?" She asked, her stifled voice clearer this time.

"Not fighting, it was just a misunderstanding."

"That explains his foul mood. Anyway, have to get to work. Started helping Jo in her dad's shop." She revved the car engine. "Do us all a favour and make up with Alec before he drives us all crazy." Chloe blew me a kiss and drove off.

I contemplated, one last time, running down to Alec's Annexe but thought better of it.

With a heavy heart, I made my way back home. Each step closer to my front door caused my head only hurt worse than when I first woke up.

***

Things had shifted since the day Max took me to the sculpture park. He wasn't as distant and actually made the effort to ring me every night before bed, even if he didn't have the time to see me.

Sian was too busy with work to meet up, and Alec had disappeared somewhere with Finn. No one had seen or heard from him since Wednesday morning. Sian asked Chloe where they were but he only gave his mother a vague explanation about needing a break. His phone had been switched off since.

With the stress of her exams over, Rosie mellowed out. I kept our interactions brief, fearing anything could set her off again.

Max called on Sunday asking if I would go to the cinema with him that night.

With our nearest multiplex being a good forty minutes away, he had to pick me up a little before seven pm so we could make the eight pm showing. That would leave us enough time to grab snacks, drinks, and see the previews.

I finished dinner with my mother and sister, excused myself and ran to my room where I threw on a pair of black ripped jeans and an off the shoulder striped tee. With my hair up in a high ponytail, my neck looked bare, so I rummaged around in my jewellery box only to find a starfish necklace Alec had given me on one of my birthdays.

I received a text from Max, letting me know he was waiting outside as I was securing the necklace around my neck. After swiping a quick layer of gloss across my lips, I slid on my favourite pair of black converse, grabbed my bag and sprinted for the door.

Max leant against his black Ford Fiesta, his hands shoved deep inside his stonewashed jeans with one foot resting against his closed door. As I approached, he stood up straight and extended a hand for me to take. His face broke out into a beaming smile as he spun me around, stopping me only when I was tightly secured against his body.

He placed a brief kiss on my cheek and whispered in my ear. "You look hot." He traced the neckline of my Bardot style top with his finger, sending shivers down my spine before walking me over to the passenger side of his car and opening my door.

We arrived at Portsmouth's ODEON Cinema with twenty minutes to spare. Max took my hand as we strolled into the foyer. Large digital posters with the latest releases adorned the walls.

"So what are we watching? Hereditary? Someone at work saw it and said it's pretty decent." Max concentrated on the listings, running his free hand through his unkempt, dirty blond curls.

"No way! I told you I don't do horror. What about the new Jurassic World? I could be mean and force you to sit through a chick flick," I chuckled. "You're lucky, I can't see any on."

Max joined in on the laughter, placing his arm around my waist to guide me towards the counter where we could get our tickets.

As we approached the queue, a familiar face glanced our way. I automatically took a step away from Max, making his arm fall off.

"Alec, when-, when did you get back?" I stammered, my voice weak from shock.

Alec's handsome face was closed off; his mouth set in a hard line, his eyebrows furrowed as his eyes jumped back and forth from Max to me.

"Came back this morning. Look, Nat can I-,"

A mass of red hair swung in front of my eyes, cutting Alec off mid-sentence. "They didn't have any Maltesers left, so I grabbed a bag of peanut M&M's to share." Hope looped her arm in Alec's. They looked too cosy. Well, she did. He seemed uncomfortable as he tried subtly releasing her grip on his limb. Were they here alone on a date?

As I asked myself that question, Finn and Abigail cut the line in front of Max and I to join Alec and Hope.

"Hey Nat, Max, do you mind us cutting in? Alec was saving our spaces," Abigail asked in her usual peppy voice.

"No, go ahead. We have a little while before it starts. Are you staying for longer then, Finn?" I checked my watch for the time to stop myself from staring at Alec.

"Yeah, Abigail convinced me to spend most of the summer here and Alec drove me home so I could grab more of my stuff." Abigail gazed up at him as if he was the only person in the room. Finlay pulled her into his side and placed a chaste kiss to the crown of her head like you would a child.

I tried to hide my amusement but Alec clocked it having yet to look away from me. He crossed his arms over his body as he studied each of my movements, making me feel uncomfortable. I wanted to look everywhere but at him and Hope, who whispered in his ear. Every so often she would look my way with a large smile on her lips. A wave of nausea hit me.

"Nat, line might take ages. Stay here, I'll grab us some popcorn and drinks," Max mumbled before walking away to the refreshments kiosk.

Absentmindedly, I played with the starfish pendant on my necklace, which Alec must have noticed. He stepped towards me and removed the pendant out of my hand to examine it.

He lowered his face closer to mine so only I could hear him. "Are you on a date with Max?"

My stomach tightened and twisted. "Are you on one with Hope?" My hands fisted by my side as I held his gaze and my heart thumped in my chest.

Before he had a chance to explain, Hope tugged on his arm as it was their turn to choose their film. He asked the lady at the counter for two tickets to see Hereditary. Finn had already paid for his and Abigail's. Alec didn't need to answer my question. It definitely looked like a date.

"Enjoy your film with Max, Nat. I would say see you later, but we're going out for dinner afterwards," Hope shrugged her shoulders, giving me a half-smile.

"You know, Alec hates horror films and peanut M&M's make his tummy hurt," I blurted out as they walked away. Alec peered over his shoulder, shaking his head, as he followed the others.

Max still hadn't returned as I approached the stand, so I bought two tickets for the Jurassic World viewing and stood off to the side to wait for him.

Five minutes later, he appeared with two popcorns and two diet Pepsis. It wouldn't have been my first choice if I had gone to get them, but I wasn't ungrateful. I thanked him as he passed mine over and strolled towards our screening room.

"Hang on, I'll buy our tickets." Max went to queue back up at the counter.

"No need. I've done it." I placed my arm through Max's keeping us moving before we missed the previews, which were my favourite part of going to the cinema.

"What? No, I was going to get them. I invited you. Let me pay you back," he protested, his deep voice echoing through the foyer.

"A thank you will do. Besides, you got the food and drinks. The least I can do is buy the tickets. I will not have you pay for everything. Come on, I don't want to miss it."

Max reluctantly let the matter of paying me back go and settled down in his seat to enjoy Chris Pratt and his dinosaurs.

***

From the start of the film, my mind was consumed with images of Alec in the other screen room. Was he sitting next to Hope? Was he leaning into her ear to make sure she was okay like Max did to me? Was he rubbing her hand with his thumb like Max tried before I pulled away? Why couldn't I focus on being with Max?

Needing five minutes to myself, I made an excuse to use the toilets while I actually went to pace the hallway outside the film Alec was seeing. I couldn't bring myself to take a peek inside. The screams from everyone in that room were enough to put me off, and I couldn't let Alec catch me checking up on him. I had no right to. After all, wasn't I meant to be on a date with Max?

Returning to my seat, I turned to Max and asked if he minded leaving early. He didn't even question my sudden change of mind and we drove back to his apartment in Liss.

The drive back remained quiet with my mind still on Alec's date. I told myself that once we were at Max's, I would focus all my attention on him.

Max's apartment was compact to put it nicely. It was really all he needed. When you walk in, you entered the lounge, slash kitchen, slash dining area. Off that space was his bedroom with a teeny bathroom attached to it. If I needed a wee, I would have to go through his room to access it. Not the most practical layout, but with only him living here, he told me he didn't mind.

"Do you want to just watch something here as we missed our film?" Max quizzed as he grabbed two beers from his fridge. He cracked them open and handed one of them over.

Simply giving a nod as a response, I took a swig of the ice-cold beer.

We settled down on his scuffed two-seater leather sofa as he flicked through the options on Netflix. I honestly didn't care what we put on. I just wanted a distraction from the awkward start to our date. None of this was Max's fault. He hadn't even picked up on my change of mood. My beer was going down nicely as I felt the tension in my neck loosen up.

I downed the drink. Sensing I needed to relax, Max made his way back to his fridge and fetched me another beer. He, however, stuck to only one bottle as he sipped his.

Max placed his arm around my shoulders, making me lean against his chest as we watched some TV show about a police station. It was meant to be a comedy, but in my frame of mind, I hadn't laughed once.

Leisurely, his hand made its way to the small of my back and he traced slight circles on my bare skin, below my top. The combination of the beers and his touch made me sleepy, so I allowed myself to close my eyes for a little bit.

Max's hand had now inched its way up my back. He stroked down my cheek, tucked a strand of my hair that had come loose from my ponytail behind my ear and whispered, "I really want to kiss you."

Those words had me wide awake as I spun to study his expression. "What?" I mumbled.

"I can't stop thinking about kissing you. Can I kiss you, Nat?" He cupped my face, his thumbs stroking the side of my lips.

Just like before, I could only nod as his deep brown eyes dropped to my mouth. I was fed up with overthinking everything and wanted to just live in the moment. He licked his lips as his face neared mine.

I smelt the popcorn we had earlier as our breaths mingled. Max kissed me and every thought vanished. It started off slow and soft. He ran his fingers down my spine for them to settle on my hips, pulling me closer until I felt his heart beating against my chest.

He broke our kiss to take me in as If waiting for a reply to an unspoken question. Finding whatever he was seeking, he crashed his lips to mine. I barely reacted before his tongue traced the seam of my lips, forcing them open. A rough and sloppy kiss filled with longing.

My hands made their way into his hair to tug on his unruly curls, causing him to moan. That only pushed me to deepen our kiss and move my body over his until I straddled his lap.

We broke apart for air only for Max to place tender sensual kisses along my jaw, down my neck and across my collarbone. I couldn't muster one coherent thought as lust took over my body. Max was a drug I knew had the potential to destroy me yet struggled to give it up.

"I really want you. You're so sexy," he breathed against my skin between each caress of his lips. "Tell me you want me too."

He helped me out of my top and I did the same to him. Our clothes frantically discarded, leaving us in only our underwear. Max's mouth returned to mine, causing my skin to tingle and my mind to fog up.

Max abruptly stood, dragging me to my feet, and urged me to wrap my legs around his waist. Fuelled only by desire, I allowed him to carry me into his bedroom, nerves only seeping into my body as he laid me down on his bed. Was I really about to make a mistake I could never take back?

***