Book 1: B5 [Canon]: Meeting the Russian

Naturally, as soon as virtual reality became advanced enough to simulate feelings both physical and mental, social applications developed bars and other establishments where users could come together and get drunk.

Ryouta, despite being underage at the time, was able to use an exploit in his old virtual reality headset to allow him permission to play games or engage in activities reserved for legal adults. This includes going to virtual bars and getting drunk.

He never drank before in real life since he was too much of a goody-two-shoes, but in virtual reality, who was going to stop him?

The “bar” that he finds himself in is accessed through the world’s leading social platform. While Ryouta isn’t the type to partake in social media, he had no issue creating a fake profile so that he could partake in these activities.

There is a row of people sitting at the bar and nearly every table in this lobby is full. There is only one table left open.

Ryouta walks up to it and sits down.

Another man sits down at the same time as him.

Ryouta and the man look at each other.

“Want to share?” Ryouta asks.

The other man shrugs and finishes getting comfortable in his seat.

A woman walks up to them a few minutes later and sets menus down on the table in front of them. “Hi there! What can I get for ya?” she asks them. Her outfit is pretty stereotypical of these kinds of places as far as Ryouta can tell. She’s wearing short shorts that tightly hug against her and a tank top that leaves little of her bust to the imagination.

“Hi, uhh, umm, what do you recommend? I’ve never had anything to drink before,” Ryouta stutters out. He realizes that he’s going to need to force himself to act more confident if he doesn’t want to raise any suspicious flags. Unfortunately for him, given that he’s still in the phase where he wants to look at every pair of breasts that he sees, it is very difficult for him to act calm and confident with her standing so close.

His situation grows even worse when it turns out that she’s the type who loves cherry boys like himself.

She bends over right next to him. Her vast valley of cleavage tempts him to jump straight into it uncaring of whatever consequences there may be. He can’t help but think that going diving into her valley would be a great way to end the social life of his fake identity.

If only he’d discovered hentai already. He would never be in this position. Unfortunately, it is still several months before he dives into that rabbit hole to never return.

“What’s the matter? Is there something on my face?” the woman asks, pressing even closer to him.

He can feel them.

Those two giant things are now pressing against his shoulder.

A shock shoots through his spine which causes him to sit up perfectly straight and look forward at the man sitting across from him.

“I – I want whatever he’s having! Please!” Ryouta says.

His face has never felt hotter before. As great as this woman is, he’s tempted to just panic log out before he gets any more embarrassed.

And to take care of certain needs while this is all still fresh in his mind.

He is a teenage boy, after all.

“You’re too precious,” she says before turning her attention to the other man. “And what would you like?”

“Vodka,” the man says with a heavy Russian accent.

“Two vodkas coming right up,” she says, looking back at Ryouta and winking. She even shows him a little bounce of her breasts before spinning around and walking away with an exceptional sway to her hips.

Ryouta’s eyes find it impossible to tear themselves off of her.

“You virgin?” the other man asks.

Ryouta finally looks away from her. “I – uh, no! Of course not. I’ve slept with tons of hot bitches before,” Ryouta says. He has a feeling that the other guy isn’t buying it going by that cringing expression on his face. “…yes…”

“Is okay. You will lose it eventually. She does have big ones, very nice to look at.”

“Yeah, those might be the best I’ve ever seen.”

“Nyet. You must see Russian girls. Russian girls look better. Look up Russian woman tits once done here.”

“What makes them better than normal girls?”

“They are Russian.”

Ryouta doesn’t know enough about Russian girls versus everybody else to refute that logic, so he just accepts it for now.

“I’m Ryouta. What’s your name?” Ryouta asks despite the other man’s name showing above his avatar. It reads “Boris.”

“If Ryouta, why avatar say John?”

“A-ah… well, you see, I uhh…”

“You are on fake account, no?”

Ryouta hangs his head low. “Yeah…”

“Do not worry. I am same. Real name Viktor.”

“Nice to meet you, Viktor,” Ryouta extends a hand for a shake.

“How old are you?”

“Don’t tell anybody, but,” Ryouta leans over the table to whisper into Viktor’s ear, “I’m only fourteen.”

“Am fifteen. Do not worry. We are friend now, and friend do not tell secrets.”

“Sounds good to me! By the way—”

“Here ya are!” the woman comes back over, placing the two glasses of vodka down on the table in front of the boys. “Let me know if either of you two need anything else, alright?” Despite her telling both of them that, she’s focusing entirely on teasing Ryouta.

“Y-yeah, thanks,” Ryouta whimpers.

She fortunately walks away instead of sticking around to tease him.

Naturally, they both watch her leave.

“Let us drink to new friend,” Viktor says, holding up his glass.

“Cheers! I think that’s what they say, right?”

“Da.”

They clink their glasses together and get to drinking. While they would likely be gagging on the alcohol in real life for chugging it down the way they are, this app is so kind as to not implement the annoying realistic parts of alcohol. Instead, they both get straight to getting tipsy.

It takes them three drinks each before they are both wasted. Apparently, there was a “drunk” meter that they were completely ignorant of, and their “tolerance” stat is so low that the drunk meter filled up very quickly.

“Hey! You… are pretty fun! And cool! And… stuffsh… hehe, this feels funnnnnnyyyy,” Ryouta giggles out.

“Da… da, feel…” Viktor burps.

Ryouta giggles. “It shounded like you say – said, say, no… says… said? Said dada, like dad – like a babies… hey, hello, hi.”

The waitress comes back over to their table. Ryouta lights up and makes gropy hands. “Boobs! I mished you! I want to marriage you butt – no, boobs… yeah! Those! Wait… what if boobs could fly?” Ryouta suddenly has a very intense expression on his face as if seriously contemplating a philosophical concept.

“Right… you were cuter before you got wasted. Anyways, I’ll be taking these empty glasses,” she says after setting down a couple glasses of water. “Try not to cause any trouble, alright?”

“Yes sir! Ma’am! Ehehe, yes boobs! Do I have… boobs?” Ryouta gropes himself.

No boobs.

The waitress rolls her eyes and leaves.

“I think she like you,” Viktor says.

“Dude… really? Oh man, I’m toooootally gonna shmash dat boobo,” Ryouta mumbles, looking like he’s about to fall out from his chair from how much he is swaying and giggling.

“Boobo?”

“Yeah! Boobosh! Boobooboosh… booboobsh? Bobobsh? Boobs sound like Bob… do guysh named Bob come from boobsh? I wish I could… be a boob – a Bob boob.”

“Friend, I think you drink too much,” Viktor says. Despite sounding more coherent, Viktor’s face is bright red all the way to his ears as he keeps the top of his head resting down on the table.

“Oh yeah! We’re… friendsh! Now! How do I… how do I talk to you… outshit? Outshit… shit, out? Out… shit… Oh! Outshide! Yeah, that.” Ryouta bursts into another giggling fit.

“I send friend request,” Viktor says, waving his hands through the air as if he is conducting an orchestra.

“Friend request received,” a voice says in Ryouta’s head.

“Accept it! Accept, accept!” Ryouta shouts loudly enough for the entire bar to look over at him.

Ryouta doesn’t remember anything that happened after that. All he remembers is waking up the next day and panicking because he couldn’t see anything. In fact, his panic was so great that his parents burst into the room thinking something was wrong with him as he was screaming about being blind. Alas, it turned out that he had fallen asleep with his headset still on and managed to unplug it during his sleep. There would normally be a menu to look at while the headset is on, but instead, he couldn’t see anything at all.

After school that day, he came home, looked at the social media account he was logged into to try and remember what happened, and saw a direct message from some guy who he could only vaguely remember. The message was inviting him to another chat program where they could directly talk with their voices.

Ryouta accepted the invitation. Afterward, the two talked about what games they like to play and realized they played not only the same MMORPG, but on the same server!

And so, the two began playing games together every day when they were online at the same time. It was difficult given that they were across the world from one another, but they always made time for each other to cause chaos together.