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Chapter 25

Chapter 25

the roommate

The fuzzy feeling in my head faded away as I gradually awoke from my slumber. My thoughts swirled around the events of the previous night, and I could hardly believe how childish I had acted. What had gotten into me? The memories of my tantrum and my insistence on staying close to Mommy—no, to Cat—made my cheeks burn with embarrassment. I wasn't a baby, but last night, I certainly acted like one.

My self-reflection was interrupted by the sound of my bedroom door swishing open. "Good morning, lovebug!" Cat's warm voice greeted me, her smile as bright as the morning sun streaming through my window. "No class today. You have a doctor's appointment."

This was news to me. "Really?" I questioned groggily, still half-asleep. "I didn't schedule one..."

"I did, honey," Cat replied, her voice carrying a slight hint of sadness that made me sit up a little straighter. Why was she sad? Did something happen? My mind, still groggy, couldn't piece it together, but I knew I had a lot of questions.

"Oh, okay," I murmured, shifting to my other pillow and closing my eyes. If I didn't have to get up for class, then I could sleep more, right?

Before I could drift off again, I felt the bed shift as Cat climbed in next to me. I opened my eyes to see her laying there, a gentle smile on her face. She reached out and began to scratch the length of my back, sending a shiver of contentment down my spine.

"Guess what?" Cat said happily, her tone light and playful.

"What?" I replied, still a little confused but curious.

"Guess who's Erika Barlowe?" she teased, her eyes twinkling with joy.

A huge smile spread across my face as I turned to face Cat. I couldn't help but laugh, and the sound of my laughter made Cat laugh too. I sat up slightly, wrapping my arms around her in a tight hug.

"I know you're just so overcome with sadness about it," Cat joked as she returned my hug, squeezing me tightly. I closed my eyes and took in the moment, feeling the warmth and love radiating from her.

When Cat had first asked to adopt me, I had been vulnerable, having just had a big fight with Mama. I had said yes almost impulsively, but immediately afterward, I had regretted it. I wasn't sure I wanted another mother, especially after the strained relationship I had with my birth mother. But as time went on, I realized that Cat was closer to a mother than Mama had ever been. She was gentle, loving, and patient with me. Sure, she made mistakes, but it was her first time being a mother, just as it was my first time being a daughter.

"Now, time to get ready for your doctor's appointment, little one," Cat said, gently releasing me from our hug. I noticed her wiping away stray tears that had fallen from her face, and it made my heart warm even more.

"Can you help me get ready?" I asked, knowing that it would make her feel better.

"Of course," Cat responded, smiling up at me. Her smile was so full of love that it made me feel like everything was going to be okay.

Cat helped me out of bed and guided me to my closet. "How about we pick out a cute little fall outfit for you today?" she suggested, her tone light and cheerful.

I nodded whilst Cat pulled out a soft, cream-colored sweater with tiny embroidered leaves scattered across it. "This would look so cute on you," she said, holding it up for me to see.

I smiled and nodded in agreement. "It's really pretty."

She paired the sweater with a pair of dark green leggings and some warm, fuzzy socks. "You'll be all cozy and stylish," she said with a wink, helping me into the outfit.

Once I was dressed, she brushed my hair, pulling it back into a simple ponytail. "There we go. All ready for your big day," she said, stepping back to admire her work.

I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. The outfit was adorable, and I felt cute in it, even if a small part of me still yearned to be seen as more grown-up.

As we headed out the door, I looked up at Cat. "Can I drive?" I asked, trying to sound casual. Driving was something I had been practicing and though I had my license I was not the best, and I wanted to show Cat that I could handle it.

Cat shook her head with a smile. "Absolutely not, lovebug. Maybe another time when we're not on a schedule," she said kindly but firmly.

I felt a pang of disappointment but decided to let it go. After last night's behavior, I figured I needed to prove that I could handle more responsibility. "Okay," I said, trying not to let my disappointment show. If I wanted to gain more independence, I would have to start acting like an adult.

The drive to the doctor's office was quiet, with me lost in thought about how I could show Cat that I was ready for more responsibility.

"So who's my doctor?" I asked. I had a doctor in Okinawa, but not in America yet.

"Dr. Madden, a friend of mine." Cat said.

"Why do you have so many friends for everything?" I rolled my eyes and looked at her.

Cat laughed, but ignored my question. We arrived at the doctor's office.

Dr. Juliana Madden, greeted us warmly as we entered her office. "Good morning, Erika! How are you feeling today?" she asked, her voice friendly and comforting.

"I'm good," I replied, trying to sound confident.

As Dr. Madden smiled and led us into the exam room, I noticed something odd. The walls were covered in bright, colorful murals depicting animals, balloons, and other childish things. A giraffe peeked over the corner of the room, and a playful monkey swung from a painted vine. The exam table I sat on had a crinkly paper cover with cartoon characters printed on it. My gaze drifted to the shelf, where a collection of plush toys and a basket of stickers sat invitingly.

It took a moment for the realization to hit me: this wasn't just a doctor's office—it was a pediatrician's office.

My stomach twisted in discomfort as I took in the surroundings. The room felt like it was meant for someone much younger, and I could feel a flush of embarrassment creeping up my neck.

I glanced at Cat, who was chatting casually with Dr. Madden, explaining my recent symptoms and health concerns. She was doing most of the talking, as if I weren't even there. My irritation flared. I wasn't a child; I could speak for myself.

I wanted to say something, to tell them that I didn't belong in a place like this, but the words got caught in my throat. Instead, I found myself fidgeting with the hem of my sweater, my eyes darting around the room as I tried to push down the rising frustration.

Dr. Madden's voice brought me back to the conversation. "Erika, do you want to add anything about how you've been feeling?" she asked, her tone still kind but now directed at me.

I looked up, trying to find the right words. "Um, I've been feeling tired sometimes, and I get headaches. But otherwise, I think I'm okay," I said, my voice a little quieter than I intended.

"Thank you for sharing that," Dr. Madden said, making a note in her file. I could tell she was trying to be supportive, but the bright, childish room around us made it hard for me to feel like I was being taken seriously.

As the appointment continued, I couldn't shake the discomfort. When Dr. Madden asked about my period, I felt my face heat up with embarrassment. I wasn't sure how to talk about it, especially not in a room that looked like it belonged in a daycare. I stumbled over my words, feeling more like a child with each passing second.

Cat, noticing my struggle, stepped in again. "She actually just got it this month," she said, her voice calm and reassuring, "that's actually the reason I scheduled this appointment to make sure everythings okay."

Dr. Madden nodded, giving me a gentle smile that only made me feel more like a little kid. "It's completely normal to feel a little shy about these things, Erika. You're doing just fine," she cooed, her tone soft and understanding.

I felt like I was shrinking. My gaze dropped to my hands, which were clenched tightly in my lap. I didn't want to be in this room, didn't want to be talked to like I was still a child.

And yet, when Dr. Madden mentioned a vaccine, my stomach twisted in fear. The thought of getting a shot made my palms sweat, but I didn't want to seem even more like a baby. I nodded, trying to keep my expression neutral, but the anxiety was bubbling up inside me.

When the needle came out, though, all my attempts at acting grown-up fell apart. I could feel my breathing quicken, and tears started to prick at the corners of my eyes. I didn't want to cry, I didn't want to be the child this room made me feel like, but the fear was overwhelming.

Cat noticed immediately and gently pulled me onto her lap, holding me close. "It's okay, lovebug. Mommy's right here," she whispered, her voice soothing.

I buried my face in her shoulder, the frustration and embarrassment finally giving way to the comfort of her embrace. It wasn't the grown-up reaction I had hoped for, but right now, I just needed her.

Dr. Madden quickly administered the shot, cooing softly to me the whole time. "You're doing so well, Erika. Just a little pinch, and it's all over. Such a brave girl."

When it was over, she handed me a sticker, and I couldn't help but pout. I didn't want a sticker; I wanted to be treated like the adult I was trying so hard to become.

After Dr. Madden handed me the sticker, I felt a wave of frustration wash over me. I was trying so hard to act like an adult, to prove to Cat and myself that I didn't need to be babied all the time. And here I was, feeling embarrassed about a sticker like I was five years old again. I couldn't help the pout that formed on my lips, my fingers playing nervously with the edges of the sticker as if touching it made me feel even smaller.

Cat was quick to notice my expression and gently brushed my hair back, her hand resting on my cheek. "You did such a good job, honey," she said, her voice warm and full of pride.

I didn't respond, just nodded, still feeling the lump in my throat that had been there since the shot. I was glad it was over, but the embarrassment lingered. As we left the doctor's office, I couldn't shake the feeling of being treated like a child, even though I had tried so hard to act mature.

"Hey," Cat said softly as we walked out to the parking lot, her arm slipping around my shoulder. "How about we go get some ice cream? I think a little treat would be nice after that, don't you?"

The idea of ice cream sounded great. But as soon as she mentioned it, a pang of nausea hit me. Ice cream was a sore subject. I could still hear his smug voice telling everyone that we had hooked up, turning my stomach in knots. I blinked back the sick feeling that crept up in my throat, trying to push the memory away. I didn't want to think about it—not right now, not when I was with Cat, trying to be normal and enjoy the day.

I forced a small smile, hoping it didn't look as fake as it felt. "Yeah, ice cream sounds good," I said, trying to keep my voice light. The last thing I wanted was for Cat to notice that something was wrong. I couldn't explain it to her. Not yet.

"Just good not amazing?" Cat laughed as she opened the car door for me.

I rolled my eyes, "Sounds like the best thing ever." I sarcastically replied.

"Okay no need for the attitude." Cat's tone shifted to a more serious one. Yikes, yes sergean.

"Sorry." I said sincerely.

"That's okay monkey, just don't let it happen again missy." She smiled.

We drove in comfortable silence to the ice cream parlor, and I did my best to focus on the present. Cat hummed along to the radio, glancing over at me with that motherly warmth that always made me feel safe.

When we arrived at the little ice cream shop, the smell of freshly baked waffle cones hit me the moment we walked through the door. Cat let me pick out whatever I wanted, and despite the churning in my stomach, I ordered a double scoop of chocolate chip cookie dough in a cone. My favorite.

Cat got mint chocolate chip, her go-to flavor, and we found a small table by the window to sit at. The sun was shining brightly, casting a warm glow on the little parlor. It was the kind of day that should've felt perfect, but my mind kept wandering back to Josh and the lies he had spread about me. I tried to focus on the ice cream, but every bite felt heavy, like I was forcing it down.

Cat, oblivious to my inner turmoil, smiled at me as she licked her cone. "You're getting it all over your face," she teased, laughing as she reached over to wipe a bit of ice cream from my chin with a napkin.

I blushed, feeling a little childish under her playful scrutiny. "It's hard to eat a cone neatly," I muttered, trying to laugh it off.

Cat grinned mischievously and smeared a little bit of her ice cream on the tip of my nose. "Now you really look like a little girl," she teased, her laughter filling the air.

I gasped in mock outrage, reaching up to wipe the ice cream off my nose. "Cat!" I whined, though a giggle slipped out despite myself. The playful moment was enough to pull me out of my spiraling thoughts, if only for a little while.

Cat leaned back in her chair, still chuckling. "You're such a goofball, baby" she said affectionately, taking another bite of her ice cream.

"I'm not a baby." I replied angrily.

"You're my baby." Cat got up and swiftly picked me up and attacked me with thousands of kisses.

I uncontrollably laughed, the blush on my cheeks was so red. Cat was the goofball, not me.

"Cat stoppp." I somehow got out between my giggles.

"That's not my name lovebug." Cat paused her kisses to say, but quickly resumed with an additional tickle or two.

"Mommy stoppp." I finally caved.

Suddenly everything came to a halt and I could finally breathe again.

I could feel Cat's lipstick was all over my face. Embarrassed couldn't even begin to describe what I was feeling.

Cat chuckled, "Looks like you need a bath little one"

I furrowed my eyebrows in response. I was going to shower either way, but Cat made it so that I had lipstick all over my face.

We continued eating, and though I still felt a bit angry, the warmth of the moment made me feel lighter. For a while, it was easy to forget about everything else—about Josh, about the doctor's office, about my face.

As we finished up, Cat wiped my hands with a napkin, just like she would for a little kid.

"I was going to wash my hands." I responded to her sudden contact.

"Uh huh sure baby." Cat disregarded my comment.

Just as we were about to leave, Cat smiled at me in that way that meant she had something up her sleeve. "So," she began, her voice light and playful, "I was thinking... how would you feel about a little road trip this Friday?"

"A road trip?" I asked, curious. "Where are we going?"

"To California," Cat replied, her smile widening. "For Thanksgiving break. I thought it might be nice to visit my family. It's been a while, and they're dying to meet you."

My heart skipped a beat at the thought of meeting Cat's family. I'd never met them before, and while part of me was excited, another part of me felt anxious. What if they didn't like me? What if I wasn't what they expected? But Cat's excitement was contagious, and I found myself smiling despite my nerves.

"That sounds fun," I said, trying to match her enthusiasm. "I've never been to California."

"You're going to love it," Cat assured me, her eyes sparkling. "We'll leave next Friday as soon as your classes are done. It'll be a nice little getaway."

I nodded, feeling a mix of excitement and nerves. "Yeah, I'd like that."

We left the ice cream shop and headed home, the warm sun beating down on us as we walked to the car.

"You've never really talked about your family, why?" I asked with genuine curiosity.

"No reason." Cat shrugged, keeping her eyes on the road.

I didn't want to pry, yet I did, "Are you guys close?"

"Sure." Cat replied simply. Something was up, but I supposed if she wanted to tell me she would have.

As we pulled into the driveway, my phone buzzed in my pocket. I glanced at it, seeing a message from an unknown number. My stomach twisted again, a sense of dread creeping in. I didn't open it. Instead, I shoved my phone back into my pocket and followed Cat inside, trying to shake off the unease.

First stop though would be to wash off my face.

Later that evening, as we sat down for dinner, I couldn't stop thinking about the road trip. I hadn't been on a real vacation in years, and the idea of spending time with Cat's family both excited and scared me.

Cat must have noticed my quietness because she reached across the table and took my hand. "Hey, you okay?" she asked, her voice soft with concern.

I nodded, offering a small smile. "Yeah, just thinking about the trip."

She squeezed my hand gently. "You don't have to worry, lovebug. Everyone already loves you."

I nodded again, hoping she was right. I didn't want to ruin the trip by overthinking everything. I wanted to enjoy it, to have fun and make new memories with Cat and her family.

After dinner, Cat insisted on giving me a bath. I protested at first, claiming I wanted a shower, but she wasn't having it. "Come on," she said with a wink, "I'll make you a bubble bath. You love bubbles, don't you?"

I stopped in shock, the events of yesterday still making me cringe.

"No, I can just shower, it's okay, thank you though." I got up from the couch.

Cat gave me that piercing glare that told me I wasn't going to get my way.

"Nonsense." She responded already almost at the bathroom door.

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ohmygodododod sorry i literally have been so busy with work and school and i fear my writing time has suffered. hope you enjoy 💋💋💋i'll try to be more consistent (try 😬)

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