25: Fleeting Moments

Quincy St. Martin

When I was a little girl, the shadows inside my dark bedroom used to scare me.

The moonlight that stole in from outside the windows on a peaceful night created shadows of monsters that moved inside my head. Stormy rainy nights with howling wind, rolling thunder, and bolts of lightning, on the other hand, calmed me down.

The harsh pattering of the pouring rain against my windows lulled me to sleep. To me, the raging storm is when nature shows its true colors, and I loved it. I still love it.

During those peaceful nights when I was scared of the shadows, Nana would lie down next to me and sing me a soft lullaby until I fell asleep.

During those stormy nights, when the sound of thunder and rain lulled me to sleep, Nana would lie down beside me and claim that she was making sure that I wasn’t scared.

I always suspected that she was the one who was scared of the thunder and lightning. I’d like to think that we soothed each other.

Caspian reminds me of both those peaceful nights ~and~ the stormy nights. He’s undeniably beautiful and charming, sophisticated and charismatic. True, most of the time, he also seems bored with the world and oh, so arrogant. He looks like he’s above everybody.

Yet when he looks at me with those bright green eyes, he makes me forget the world. His charming smile sometimes almost seems innocent and guileless. His mischievous grin more often than not resembles that of a naughty little boy. So harmless.

It fools you into thinking he’s not the one to fear.

Yet I sense that, under that charm and sophistication, there’s an untamed, menacing being.

There is a raging storm inside him that will destroy everything in its path without mercy.

I wonder if I would be scared of his true colors.

Tonight is peaceful. No thunder or lightning. I’m lying here, staring at the shadows in my bedroom, struggling to catch my breath just recalling those kisses.

Tonight, in the restaurant, we must have kissed for hours. His kisses turned my brain to mush. I forgot everything but his lips and his tongue and his hands on me.

I was aware of our surroundings only after he let me go. I was concerned about other people seeing us, but nobody even spared us a glance.

When we made our way out of the place and walked past other booths, I understood why nobody cared. Some of those people in other booths were doing more than what we were doing. Like way more. I had to look away in shock.

Caspian didn’t seem surprised at all. He just pulled me closer to him and placed a kiss on top of my head as he casually walked us out. I don’t recall much at all of our drive back except for his hand holding mine. I kept thinking of those kisses. My brain was fried, I think.

I do remember him asking for my phone number and pressing a quick kiss to my lips before I made my legs move to take me inside the darkened house.

Lying in my bed now, I can’t stop replaying those kisses. I’ve kissed before, but Caspian’s kiss tonight made me feel like I had never been kissed before.

Everything about him confuses me, this beautiful, dangerous, and powerful creature who is calling me his.

Am I really his mate? Why me? How do I feel about this? How should I feel about this? What about my dream to live a normal human life?

I look at Layla who’s snoring softly in her bed across from mine. She was already asleep when I got home. She really is a heavy sleeper.

I wish Nana were here for me to talk to. Nana had answers to everything.

She didn’t quite make sense sometimes, especially after she had too much to drink on some evenings, but I wish she had answers to all my trouble and my confusion.

***

Adam, our manager left me a message asking me if I could come early this morning to cover for Evelyn, who can’t make it. I replied yes right away.

I don’t mind making extra money, and I don’t have any classes in the morning.

Besides, I’m trying to think straight. My head is still filled with Caspian this morning. It’s crazy. Maybe work can set my brain to working properly again.

“Hello, what would you like to drink?” I click my pen and look up at the customer who’s sitting at my table. Oh God! She’s one of them! No, no, no…

She’s the Latina. One of the beautiful girls who always hangs around him. I stand there like a frozen statue for a while. If she’s here, then he might be here too. I don’t know if I’m ready to see him yet. Well, I’m dying to see him, but then I’m not.

I’m craving his kisses and his touches, yet I’m dreading seeing him again. My heart feels like it’s bursting at the thought of seeing him again, and I start looking around like a mad person. She must think I’m crazy.

“He’s not here,” she says, looking like she’s trying not to laugh.

“What? Who? It takes a while for my brain to catch up. “Oh,” I say. She means him. He’s not here now. Thank God! Or maybe not. I don’t know.

She looks at me curiously. “What makes you think that he might be lurking around when you saw me here?” she asks me.

Her dark brown eyes are probing like she’s trying to figure me out. There is some glee and mischief hidden in their depths too.

“I saw you and your other friends with him before,” I tell her. “And you look like him.” Yeah, stunningly gorgeous...and not human. What are they? That question keeps bugging me. He was very evasive when I asked him that question last night.

Should I ask this woman in front of me, or should I wait for him to tell me himself? Will he ever tell me? I look around to see if other people can hear us, and then I lean in closer to her and whisper, “I know you’re not a werewolf, but what are you?”

“Lycan,” she whispers back.

Lycans? Oh, no, no, no. I feel lightheaded all of a sudden. My world tilts on its axis for a second. Of all creatures, not ~them!~ What have I gotten myself into?

Nana told me about lycans. They are powerful and dangerous. Vicious and barbaric. They see what they like, and they just take. God help me. This is not good. Nana wouldn’t be happy. Nana wouldn’t just turn over, she would be rolling in her grave if she knew about this.

“You live with your Nana?” she suddenly asks me.

Huh? “No,” I say. How does she know about my Nana? Wait! Did I just talk about my Nana out loud? “Nana’s dead.”

“Oh, I see,” she says but she’s looking puzzled and tries to come up with something to say.

“Nana said lycans are dangerous,” I try to explain to her.

I hope she won’t get offended and claw me to death or something.

“But don’t worry, I won’t judge. I’m sure not all lycans are dangerous,” I tell her...just in case.

“Oh, but we are,” she answers quickly, almost proudly, with a wicked smile and that mischievous glint in her eyes.

“Well, that’s not very reassuring,” I tell her.

“So, he’s been bothering you?” she asks me, changing the subject.

“You have no idea.” Physically and mentally. Especially mentally. I think I’m going crazy.

“I’m Penny, by the way,” she says with a friendly grin as if she didn’t just tell me that she’s dangerous.

She could’ve killed me with a swipe of her elegant hand, which is now extended toward me.

So, okay, that’s an exaggeration since I don’t feel like I’m in any danger or at all threatened by her.

“My name’s Quincy,” I tell her, taking her hand in a brief handshake.

“Hello, ~malyshka~,” says a very deep masculine voice beside me.

Penny’s face lights up instantly. It’s amazing how her whole body seems to buzz with excitement.