Chapter 197 Fighting frustration
Heart of Darkness
Roxana got ready for combat despite knowing that this wouldnât be easy. But she would be happy if she could only land a punch. Maybe a little cut with the sword wouldnât hurt either. Yes, he was the king but he wasnât going to cry or punish a woman for hurting him. That wouldnât look good on him. Besides, this was combat, the only time where she could actually hit the king.
Alexander stood ready holding his sword. She wondered what he had in mind? Would he hurt her or hold himself back because she was a woman. She didnât want any special treatment from him right now.
âAre you ready, Your Majesty?â
She could tell by that little smirk he tried to hide that he enjoyed this. He found it silly.
âYes.â
âDonât hold back.â She told him, bringing up her sword and holding it in place.
âI donât want you dead.â He said, still holding his sword down.
âI think I will be in more trouble if you die.â
He laughed. âIf it was only that easy.â
He was too confident and she was now distracted by his laughter. Her stomach did that strange fluttering thing again. She took a deep breath and got prepared, reminding herself of all the teasing on his part.
Without warning she swung her sword at him and just like expected, he was extremely fast. Despite having his sword down, he had already brought it up to block her attack. She withdrew and made another attempt. This time he stepped out of the way. Just one step to the side and she cut through the air.
Alright. She knew it wouldnât be easy. She just needed to keep trying.
She turned around striking again. He stooped and she missed but she quickly came back with another swing from the other direction. This time he blocked her with his sword, only using one arm. He gave her an amused smile. âWhere is the surprise?â He asked her.
âIt is coming, Your Majesty.â She promised between clenched teeth.
Clink, clink. He was easily blocking her, knowing her every movement.
âWhen?â He asked.
Clink, clink.
âHave patience, Your Majesty.â
He chuckled.
âYou seem rather angry.â He pointed.
âI,â clink. âAm,â another clink. âNot!â
âAre you sure?â
âYes.â She panted. âI am just passionate about this.â She was.
âI can see that.â He said giving her a dark look before knocking her attack aside, causing her to sprint forward and collide with his chest. âVery passionate.â He drawled when she gasped.
She pushed him away with her free hand. âOh, are we using hands now?â
âWe are using everything, Your Majesty.â She said attacking him again.
âAre you sure you are not angry?â
Clink.
âWhy would I be?â
âBecause I knew you were a woman.â
Clink.
She stopped, their swords crossed in front of them. She stared into his eyes. âWhy didnât you expose me?â
âBecause I didnât want to.â
She pushed him away, using the sword this time and he grinned at her fury.
âSo you could have fun at my expense?â
She struck again, only to miss.
âSo you are angry?â
âYou asked me to sleep in your tent.â She accused.
âWould you rather sleep between two male guards?â He attacked her for the first time, but it could barely be called an attack. He teasingly tapped her sword with his.
âYou undressed in front of me.â
âOh, no. YOU came to me while I was undressed,â he corrected.
Her cheeks flushed.
âIt is my duty.â
âTo see me naked?â He raised a brow.
âNo! To follow you. I was onlyâ¦â
âDoing your duty.â He finished for her.
Her face was burning now so she went to her next complaint.
âYou asked me to give you a massage.â She said striking.
Now he wasnât only blocking. He was batting her strikes away.
âWell, I returned the favor.â He shrugged.
She was wrong about him. This man was shameless! Not one punch anymore. She needed to make it two so she could forget it and be his loyal guard again.
âWhat about the kiss?â
Clink.
âWhat about it?â
âYou kissed me!â
Clink.
âAnd you kissed me back.â
Clink.
âYou started it. You knew I was a woman.â
âI apologized for it. What about you? You were dressed as a man, yet you kissed me back.â
She froze and then her anger boiled over. She swung her sword back and forth, not caring if she hit or missed.
âExactly! Do you know how bad I was feeling about it?â
She remembered all those agonizing feelings and the heavy guilt.
The smile faded from his lips as he caught her sword with his, swirling it around. As she tried to block it she whirled around with it until her back collided with his chest and his sword pressed hers against her neck. She was trapped, her sword was trapped, held against her throat. With his free hand, he held her free arm, to hold her in place.
Roxana kept her head still, feeling her own swordâs sharp edge on her skin and his hot breath next to her ear. âTrust me, I have been agonizing too. Since the day you stepped into this castle, I have been tempted by your scent. Tortured by your presence. I had already kissed you a thousand times in my mind before we kissed. You have no idea how much strength it is taking me to stop myself from doing the things I wish to do to you.â His voice was low next to her ear, his hot breath tickling her and sending a wave of heat to her core. His words made her heart go wild in her chest and butterflies attack her stomach.
âEven now, as you catch your breath, I think of all the ways I could make you breathless. Of all the other ways I could let you release your frustration. And mine. I do not wish to hold a sword against your throat Roxana but to have my lips on your neck. To brand you as mine.â His voice was possessive.
Roxana felt the sword glide out of her hand. Her wrist became as weak as her knees. Alexander removed his sword and ever so slowly she turned around to face him with a pounding heart. She needed to see the man saying those words to her.
Alexanderâs eyes were darker than she had ever seen them, yet they seemed to glow, burn with a dark blue fire. He took a step back. âBut I canât.â He breathed. âI canât make you mine.â
A muscle ticked in his jaw.
Roxana frowned, her heart suddenly feeling tight while beating hard. It was painful. But she knew they couldnât be together. He was the king and she was his servant.
He tossed his sword aside and then took a deep breath. âI will arrange for you to work night shifts. It will be easier if we donât see each other until I find another way.â
She just looked at him, his eyes slowly mirroring the agony in hers.
âI am sorry,â he said curtly and then walked away.