CH 68

there was still some time before lu ye finished his shift, so elvis had to wait for him at the coffee shop they had agreed upon.

the cozy little cafe was filled with the aroma of freshly roasted coffee beans. elvis lay bored on the table, continuously flipping the small hourglass used for meal delivery timing.

he lacked patience and couldn’t wait for the fine sand to finish falling before he would flip the hourglass again. the bright pink sand was flipped back and forth by his fingers until the small hourglass seemed close to falling apart. finally, lu ye arrived, fashionably late from work.

lu ye had already changed out of his uniform, wearing a simple casual outfit. even so, he was noticeable in the crowd, and elvis spotted him from a distance. he sat up eagerly, waving at him.

“lu ye!” he skipped the “officer” part, cheerfully calling lu ye, “over here.”

elvis sat in the corner at the back of the coffee shop, and lu ye glanced at him upon hearing his voice. then, he walked over and took a seat opposite elvis.

“mr. elvis,” lu ye said.

“just call me by my name,” elvis half-propped himself on the table, looking interestedly at lu ye. he also half-complained, “you’re so slow; you had me waiting anxiously.”

“sorry about that,” lu ye insincerely apologized. “there was traffic on the way.”

“no problem,” elvis squinted his eyes, flashing him a grin. he raised two fingers, moving them forward twice, making an attempt to pinch lu ye’s sleeve while ambiguously saying, “as long as you cheer me up, i won’t be angry—besides, you like qi, trying me out won’t hurt.”

elvis had a long history of not getting along with qi yanbai, and even though he had decided to play matchmaker between them this time, he couldn’t change his nature. whenever he saw lu ye, he couldn’t resist teasing.

however, this time, lu ye didn’t react as strongly as he did when they were at the police station. he moved his arm away from elvis’s grasp and brushed his sleeves as if there was imaginary dust on them. then, he calmly said, “no need for such jokes—after all, you’re not gay, and you’re not interested in me either.”

lu ye’s tone was resolute, and elvis was momentarily stunned. his expression blanked out for a couple of seconds, then he widened his eyes and exclaimed dramatically, “how did you know?”

“i saw you looking at me from the moment i entered, but your gaze never went below my neck,” lu ye explained. “compared to my appearance, you were more focused on my eyes. rather than desiring me physically, it seemed like you were curious about me as a person.”

perhaps because he hadn’t been using drugs recently, although elvis still appeared hyperactive and erratic, the manic energy from the drugs had diminished considerably. consequently, lu ye saw more of him.

elvis had initially wanted to tease him, but lu ye had already delivered a subtle blow right from the start. elvis was taken aback for a moment, then suddenly burst into laughter without any warning.

“oh my god,” elvis laughed and exclaimed, “i might actually like you now.”

lu ye had a hard time understanding the twisted thought processes of artists and couldn’t be bothered to delve into why his statement had excited elvis. he simply adjusted his sitting posture, nodded slightly to the waiter who came to take their order, and declined the menu.

“just lemon water will do, thank you,” he said.

people who looked good tended to receive special treatment wherever they went. the waiter not only didn’t neglect his modest order but even added an extra large pitted cherry as decoration when serving the drink.

elvis’s gaze shifted back and forth between the cherry and lu ye. he stopped the waiter, who was about to leave, and said lazily, “excuse me,” elvis drawled lazily, “add a tiramisu for me too.”

when the tiramisu was served, elvis finally concluded his loud laughter. he gently stirred the chocolate shavings on the cake with his spoon. he examined lu ye for a moment and couldn’t help but ask, “why are you so quiet? don’t you want to ask about my relationship with qi and why i approached you?”

patients in their manic phases had highly active thought processes, disliked being ignored, and could speak endlessly without much prompting. seeing this, lu ye nodded, following elvis’s lead by asking, “so, what is the relationship between you two?”

lu ye had suspected that elvis’s tone when mentioning qi yanbai was too subtle to be a casual acquaintance. it seemed more like they had known each other for many years and knew each other inside out.

elvis appeared unusually familiar with qi yanbai, but at the same time, he subconsciously picked fights with him. this kind of relationship, where they opposed each other but also understood each other, was uncommon. given lu ye’s existing knowledge of qi yanbai, the only realm in which he could fit into such a contradictory relationship was his abnormal family.

“i see,” lu ye said, “you do look somewhat alike.”

without the heavy makeup, elvis’s appearance was quite decent. despite the thinness resulting from drug use, he had a striking mixed-race appearance with deep-set features, a high nose bridge, and, most importantly, a significant resemblance to qi yanbai.

“are you not surprised at all?” elvis tilted his head, curious.

“i had a hunch,” lu ye admitted. “his social circle is quite small, and you don’t seem like someone who fits into his ‘friend’ category.”

lu ye intentionally emphasized the word “friend.” elvis paused for a moment, struggling with his limited chinese, and then understood the implied meaning in this long sentence.

“have you always been this perceptive?” elvis suddenly chuckled. “can you see everything and guess everything?”

not everything, lu ye thought, at least not with qi yanbai.

“i finally understand why he’s so afraid of you,” elvis said, poking at the tiramisu in front of him with a spoon. he leaned back in his chair, chin propped up, and looked at lu ye with interest. “but what i don’t understand is, if he’s so afraid of you, why didn’t he leave you earlier?”

lu ye didn’t provide a direct answer to this question. instead, he asked, “he’s afraid of me, but why is he afraid of me?”

“because he lies,” elvis’s chinese was mediocre and basic, and for some words and phrases, he defaulted to english. fortunately, lu ye’s english was passable, so they were able to continue the conversation smoothly in a mix of both languages.

“everyone in our family lies,” elvis’s sentence structure was a bit jumbled. “lying is as simple as eating and drinking for us. but you, you seem to care a lot about what ‘truth’ is.”

this was the first time elvis had referred to himself and qi yanbai with “us.” this instinctive division of sides in his choice of words created a clear boundary that momentarily separated lu ye from their world.

his choice of words was so natural, so matter-of-fact, as if the “rules” of that family were the foundation of the world, and lu ye, in contrast, was the outlier.

before meeting elvis, lu ye had heard qi yanbai mention his family many times and had tried to imagine what that family was like through qi yanbai’s descriptions. however, this was the first time he stood on such a clear boundary and had the opportunity to explore that “world” through a fresh and objective perspective.

“shouldn’t i care about the truth?” lu ye asked in response.

“i don’t know,” elvis said. “anyway, none of us care.”

“everything you all care about, i don’t care about,” elvis dropped his spoon, leaned back in his chair, and gestured towards lu ye with indifference. “emotions, truth, mutual support and friendship, dolls and teddy bears dancing – none of it matters.”

“what does matter then?” lu ye asked.

“happiness,” elvis said, smiling and narrowing his eyes. “happiness is the most important.”

lu ye’s eyes flickered, and he saw something familiar in elvis that he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

qi yanbai and elvis had vastly different personalities and styles of dealing with things. qi yanbai was restrained and cautious, even when dealing with colleagues and parents who didn’t require deep connections. he always tried to make everyone feel comfortable. in contrast, elvis was reckless and carefree, seemingly unconcerned with morals and laws. he lived his life as if he didn’t care about anything in the world.

but at this moment, lu ye saw the same thing in both of them.

it was a clear sense of self-awareness, with elvis’s self-awareness being stronger and qi yanbai’s being more subtle.

in fact, during this time, lu ye had been thinking about why qi yanbai, who claimed to love him deeply, never seemed to consider lu ye’s feelings when making decisions. qi yanbai was selfish and self-centered, and he had never treated lu ye as an independent individual who deserved respect. lu ye wanted to believe that qi yanbai’s feelings for him were genuine, but this subconscious lack of recognition contradicted the love he expressed. so, even though lu ye wanted to lean toward him emotionally, he was always torn between conflicting feelings.

however, it wasn’t until now, facing elvis, that lu ye finally began to understand that the root of this conflict was not necessarily the depth of qi yanbai’s feelings, but rather their different perceptions of self.

an adult living in society had to face a variety of challenges, and there was nothing in the world that went smoothly, nor were there any guarantees of getting everything one desired. most of the time spent interacting with others was a process of compromise. most children gradually learned this through socialization and education as they transitioned from “childhood” to “adulthood.” however, perhaps due to the lack of proper upbringing in the qi family, both elvis and qi yanbai seemed to lack an understanding of this concept of “compromise.”

so, they always subconsciously pursued the simplest, quickest, and most comfortable solutions to everything, without the ability to deal with rejection.

elvis finally remembered the purpose of his visit and redirected the conversation back to qi yanbai. “qi yanbai isn’t like me in this regard. he’s too ‘normal,’ thinks too much. there are simpler ways to live, but he always cares about what others think.”

“is that so?” lu ye asked.

“yeah,” elvis said. “for example, painting. i don’t know why he cares so much about father’s approval. for me, painting is a way to express emotions and a tool to make money. actually, not many people in our family like painting, but he’s the only one who does. he doesn’t even like it that much, but he always wants to find emotions in it.”

“he needs emotional validation,” lu ye said.

lu ye had noticed this for a while. qi yanbai claimed not to need family or affection, but in reality, he didn’t reject these unfamiliar emotions, and he never shied away from them. when lu ye took him to the lunar new year celebration at the lu family, it was clear that he was moved by these emotions.

“yeah, oppos—opposite!” elvis hadn’t heard this word before, but he guessed its meaning and awkwardly repeated, “that’s right.”

“so, i always felt that he was awkward, and i didn’t like him,” elvis’s eyes shifted, and he seemed to recall something with a hint of satisfaction. he continued, “so, you’d better keep him in china and not let him go back home to annoy us.”

“is that so,” lu ye finally understood why elvis had arranged to meet him proactively. with a glance up and down, he deliberately revealed a knowing expression and casually said, “so, you bully him all the time, and you even burned his paintings for no reason, making him look bad in the year-end awards?”

elvis: …

elvis had been thinking about what good things to say about qi yanbai to lu ye in case he didn’t agree, but lu ye’s subtly accusatory tone irritated him, and he slammed his hand on the table, standing up abruptly.

“what do you mean, i bully him!” elvis exclaimed. “he’s the petty one who seeks revenge! i burned his paintings this one time, then what does he do? the next day, he sneaked into my studio and cut up my paintings with a knife!”

he seemed to have completely forgotten his initial intention to portray qi yanbai in a positive light in front of lu ye and angrily continued, “he’s the petty one, the big liar, the paranoid—”

lu ye didn’t say anything. he simply watched him with a subtle smile, his lips curved upwards.

elvis had just been vehemently complaining, when lu ye’s phone, placed on the table, suddenly lit up with a text message from qi yanbai. it was a short message with only one sentence.

“are you coming home after work tonight? i bought fish.”

perhaps it hadn’t reached a breaking point yet, but in recent days, qi yanbai hadn’t displayed the aggression in approaching lu ye as he had previously during their confrontation. however, in response, he had become restless and kept sending messages throughout the day.

in fact, this wasn’t a clever strategy. if qi yanbai were calm enough, he should have remained silent during this period, allowing lu ye’s heated emotions to cool down on their own. then, he could slowly remind himself of qi yanbai’s good qualities. instead, he was currently acting as if nothing had happened, annoying lu ye and further fueling his emotions.

the qi family was truly an absurd one, lu ye thought. there wasn’t a single normal person among them.

whether it was qi yanbai or elvis, they both possessed a kind of childlike purity. elvis disliked being wronged, and qi yanbai was afraid of losing. they had grown up in adult bodies, but when facing specific problems, they charged forward without knowing how to resolve them.

these were personality flaws resulting from a lack of proper upbringing. that’s why they were both selfish and self-indulgent, often unaware that they were straying further from the right path.

lu ye’s gaze lingered on the message for a moment, but he didn’t reply. instead, he reached out and turned off the screen.

“mr. elvis,” lu ye interrupted elvis’s outburst and said calmly, “i have one last question for you.”

“go ahead,” elvis said.

“you met him today, didn’t you?” lu ye asked. “how is he doing?”

“he’s okay,” elvis shrugged. suddenly, he remembered something and grinned maliciously. “poor thing, he’s like a stray dog sleeping under a bridge.”

the comparison was a bit harsh, and lu ye furrowed his brows unconsciously, but he didn’t argue. instead, he reached for his phone and stood up from his chair.

“thank you for your answers,” lu ye said. “i’ve already paid for the meal. you’re free to go now.”

“huh?” elvis was taken aback. “what do you mean, you’re done with your questions?”

“yes,” lu ye replied.

actually, lu ye had been curious for a long time about whether qi yanbai’s actions were motivated by his desire for control or his fear of losing lu ye.

lu ye had dealt with many cases of domestic violence and had encountered many control freaks who tried to control their partner’s whereabouts, social life, and even behavior. these individuals, driven by an inflated sense of self-importance, would become furious if their partner displayed any hint of resistance, seeing it as a threat to their own dignity.

love should be equal, and lu ye couldn’t be with someone who was a control freak. so, during these days of reflection, he had not only thought about their future together but also observed how qi yanbai reacted to lu ye’s “resistance.”

now, elvis had given him the answer, and he didn’t need to ask any more questions.

before coming, elvis had prepared a whole set of “deep feelings and strong love” speeches in his limited chinese, but he hadn’t expected lu ye to finish listening before he even started.

“you haven’t asked me whether qi yanbai likes you,” elvis hurriedly added, “he really likes you. my father asked him to come back and divide the family assets, but he refused.”

elvis seemed worried that his performance wasn’t good enough, and he was afraid that lu ye would really break up with qi yanbai, so he took a few steps to catch up and recited his lines as if he were in a play. “um, i mean… although he might seem a bit intimidating in his actions, you don’t have to be afraid of him. he will listen to you.”

lu ye’s steps paused slightly, and he finally turned to look at elvis.

in the next moment, he smirked, showing a hint of playful amusement in his eyes.

“i’ve never been afraid of him,” lu ye said.

lu ye had never thought that qi yanbai posed a threat to him. if qi yanbai tried to use force, lu ye was confident he could handle it. moreover, compared to criminals, qi yanbai’s methods were like the growls of a wolf cub—dangerous but not very intimidating. there was nothing to be afraid of.

elvis had never seen lu ye smile before, and he was slightly taken aback. he even felt that this smile had a touch of wickedness.

“so, why don’t you forgive him then?” elvis asked instinctively.

“i’ve just been thinking all along whether he is still the person i like,” lu ye said.

this statement might have sounded profound to elvis, but lu ye didn’t explain further. he simply said that and turned around, walking away while waving his hand.

“i wish you a pleasant journey back home and feel free to visit anytime, mr. elvis,” lu ye said. “but please remember to obey the law next time and not add to our workload.”