Corrupted Chaos: Chapter 31

I rolled my eyes, furious but also more alive than I’d been in weeks. Cade was back, we were sparring, and I was feeling so much more like myself that my heart ached at finding what I felt had been lost to me: myself and the love of my life.

I tried not to focus on that, though, and swung open the door. There stood my ex, his hair slicked back, a suit and freaking tie pressed perfectly for whatever show he was about to put on, and a small smile of hope on his face. He pulled me in for a hug, and we both turned as Cade growled from the countertop.

“Izzy, I didn’t know you had company,” Gerald ground out.

“Yes, well, he came unannounced.”

I saw how Gerald’s lips pulled back, how the distaste showed in his face. “I really wanted to speak to you privately.”

I took a deep breath. “Gerald, if it’s important, you can say it here and now, because I’m not quite sure I have any patience left at this point. I was clear when I left you—”

He nodded vigorously and held up his hands. “You’re right. You’re right. I’m sorry for even insinuating I deserve more of your time. I just”—he glanced at Cade and cleared his throat—“I really meant what I said when I called you to tell you I missed you. I’ve done a lot of soul-searching without you. And with my father’s business about to go bankrupt, I’ve really found it hard to cope without you because—”

Cade snorted and strolled over to my fridge like he owned the freaking place. He opened it up and grabbed a water bottle, then lifted a brow at both of us watching him. “Go on. We’re listening, Gerald.”

The way he sneered the man’s name had me wide-eyeing him, but he shrugged like he didn’t care. Quite frankly, I shouldn’t have cared either. Gerald had cheated and then handled it terribly by texting me constantly for a month after. Yet, he’d been silent since Cade threatening him until today’s text. It was a thoughtful one asking for forgiveness and for me to hear his side.

“Look, the only reason I’m here is for you. I know I fucked up, and I’m so thankful you’re letting me come over to tell you that. It shows that we still care about each other, right, baby?” He flicked his gaze to Cade like he wanted Cade to understand that too.

I sighed and combed a hand through my hair. “Honestly, Gerald, no. I’ve recently been left to wonder why a certain relationship of mine ended as well. I didn’t get it. I felt like you, texting that person, bothering them, leaving them voicemails. So I figured I owed you the same courtesy I would have liked.”

Gerald’s cheeks reddened and he started to sweat. I wasn’t sure if it was the suit, Cade staring at him, or if he was just overwhelmed, but it wasn’t even hot in here. Did he love me that much that he’d sweat over this?

“Okay, okay. That’s fair.” Then he did the most ridiculous thing ever. He kneeled down in front of me and pulled a ring out of his pocket. He gripped my hand, and I let him because I was in such shock. “I need you to forgive me. I need a second chance. I’ll be yours forever. No cheating, no straying. You’re it.”

My freaking jaw dropped. And he was so dense, he took it as a sign to shove the diamond ring on my finger.

“Gerald.” I shook my head. I grabbed him by the biceps and yanked him up. “No. What are you even thinking?”

“I love you, and we’re meant to be together. I’ll even tell him. I saw him with you, and I realized I needed to clean up my act. I needed to show you how much I cared.”

“Gerald,” Cade said his name quietly but with a firmness that made us both stop and listen to him as he walked over slowly. That small smile on his face held no happiness as he looked my ex-boyfriend up and down. “I did warn you about coming near Izzy and talking with her again, didn’t I?”

“We-well . . .” he stuttered as Cade took another step toward him. Both men stared at each other. “I-I think it’s best we let Izzy choose what she wants. Even if you’re all businessmen now, we know that you’re really . . .”

Gerald didn’t have the balls to finish that sentence, but Cade waited as he slid his knuckles down the bicep of my outstretched arm which Gerald still held. I couldn’t control how the trail of his skin touching mine left a wake of goose bumps or that I shivered when his hand encircled my wrist to slowly pull my fingers from Gerald’s grip.

Gerald let me go and watched as Cade brought my hand to his mouth. He rubbed my fingertips over his lips as he murmured to us both, “Go on, Gerald. Finish your sentence.”

“I just think she should choose who she wants.”

The man I’d so desperately tried to get over for the last month smiled at me, and my whole body vibrated with need. He didn’t stop there, though. He took his time dipping my ring finger in his mouth and swirled his tongue over every part of my skin before his teeth clenched around the engagement ring. Dragging it centimeter by centimeter off my finger, he held my gaze. I saw every part of Cade in his amber eyes at that moment. The anger at Gerald even considering that we would be apart, the pain that he’d given me the notion we could be, the humor in how I was mad at him right now but the knowledge that I wouldn’t be forever.

“Cade,” I whispered, but it came out a whimper, “what are you doing?”

He held the ring between his teeth, and it was so damn seductive that I had to clench my thighs together. I’d lost all awareness of Gerald at this point. It was me and the love of my life in that room. I wished to God that the damn ring he held between his teeth was from him to me.

“Take it,” Cade commanded, and when I did, he said, “Hand him back the ring before I put it down the garbage disposal.”

I extended my hand with the ring in it and Gerald’s face fell as I shoved it into his hand. Then, Cade snatched my hand fast and threaded his fingers through it, turning to face Gerald like we were a united front against him.

“Gerald, Cade’s right. I don’t want this from you. You need to move on.”

His face curled in disgust. “You want it with him, Izzy? You can’t. I’m the one you need. If you think spreading your legs for a guy in the mob is going to get you a penthouse for the rest of your—”

Cade grabbed Gerald’s neck so quickly, I didn’t have time to stop it. “Should I kill you fast now, or slowly later?”

He lifted my ex off the ground and shoved him back into the wall, showing his strength, his fury, and his lack of hesitation to kill. Cade was a man born from power and he had no problem exerting it.

Some might have been frightened, but I found I wasn’t at all afraid. I sighed and grabbed him by the elbow. “Cade don’t kill him. Please. I like my penthouse, and I don’t want the memory of him dying here.”

Gerald looked at me like I was deranged. Surely, I must have been a little bit. I really didn’t care about him at all. He’d cheated on me. He’d antagonized me for a long time, and he was a virus to women. It showed in the way he lashed out immediately when I turned him down.

“If I wasn’t here to make you happy today, dollface, he’d be dead.” He yanked open the door to the apartment and threw Gerald out by his neck. He crumbled over onto the floor, wheezing. “Your name is this close to being on a hit list, Gerald. And my family doesn’t miss. Keep in mind, your company is about to go bankrupt. It will be by the end of the day. Go worry about that and forget my future wife exists. Forever.”

Gerald might have tried to say something but Cade slammed the door and roared at it in frustration. Then he whipped around and grabbed me by the hips, shoving me up against the island counter and stepping between my legs. “Izzy, I swear to God, he comes back here or texts you again, I’m killing him.”

Chewing my cheek, I tried my hardest not to give in and kiss him right then. “Did you do something to his father’s company?”

“Of course I did something to his company,” Cade bellowed. “I hacked their systems and exposed his infidelities to most of his clients. I’ve also had calls with his biggest investors questioning how well they can operate when I so easily am able to infiltrate their finances. He’s finished.”

“But why?” I whispered. “We didn’t get along then and—”

“He cheated on you. He hurt you. Do you not understand the consequences of when someone does that? No one is allowed to fuck with you but me, don’t you understand? You cried, Izzy. I had to see tears streaming down your face. For that, he’s lost his company, his savings, his whole career. And if he dares go near you again, he will lose his life.”

“Cade, you can’t do those types of things for me.” I murmured, but my heart was healing, being pieced back together by each of his confessions.

“I can do whatever I want. I will always do that for you. You deserve it and more.” He tried to steady himself by taking a breath. “Don’t ever text him again. Matter of fact, I’ll be blocking him from all your devices. An ex texting my future wife is ridiculous anyway.”

I almost forgave him right then, my insides warming to the word wife, but he had much more explaining to do. “People can come visit me, Cade. I’m single and not the future wife of anyone.”

His eyes narrowed as he placed his hands on either side of me on the island counter. “You’re fucking mine.”

I shook my head and lifted my chin higher, ready to fight him about it this time. “You left me. And I’ve moved on.”

“Bullshit.” He grabbed my wrist and clamped his gold bracelet back on quickly. He fought me to lock it and then winked when he overpowered me as it latched into place.

“Are you kidding me?” I yanked at it and shoved him, but he didn’t back up even an inch. “It’s not bullshit. You can’t leave and come back like I’m some mistress you call up every now and then. Maybe you were with other women, or maybe you got sick of me but want another taste now. It’s not happening.”

“Baby”—his forehead fell to mine—“you can’t believe that.”

“Why can’t I?” I said, tears suddenly in my eyes. “I was broken, and you left. You left me to handle it all on my own.”

“And you did,” he growled out. “You had it in you. You needed to be without me.”

“So you want me to be without you but not with anyone else either.”

“Look, I thought I would be okay with you being with someone else, just not Gerald, but then I knew that wouldn’t work. I know it’s selfish. I shouldn’t be here because I’ll always have a target on my back and you’ll always be in danger. But I flew around the world to try to make sure that, instead, I’ve made you as safe as possible.” he admitted, and it cut me deep. He was standing so close. I could feel the love radiating off him, and I knew he felt it too. “Honestly, you’re still better off without me.”

He had to feel my rage at his words. How could he think that? How would I be safe from myself, from heartbreak, from feeling so lost, I couldn’t see which way was up without him. He had to know his words would act as the last straw. “Don’t you dare say that again,” I whispered.

“Baby doll, you know it’s true. Your world would be easier—’ he started, but I’d had enough.

My hand whipped out, and I swung at his face. The sound was so deafening I swear it echoed through the room, like we were in an empty cave that amplified our noise.

Cade didn’t flinch, nor did his face turn to the side. I wish I could say he didn’t lean into it, but I swear that man saw it coming from a mile away and wanted the pain of it.

“Again, Harley Quinn, and make it hurt this time.”

The noise I made as I reared back was animalistic. Tearing this man apart would be a job well done by me, I figured. No one should be subjected to the type of pain I felt when I wasn’t with him, to him coming back into my life and trying to lay claim to certain parts of me. “If you want the devil from me, you’re going to get it.”

He lifted an eyebrow, so damn cocky in his desire to ruin me. No part of me was right then. All the normal, calm parts of me disbursed and twisted. I was an algorithm ruined, I truly was glitching, falling apart, disassembling into nonsense, causing destruction as I did so. My hand didn’t just meet his face this time, but the muscle I put behind it did too.

One slap, two slaps, and probably ten more. Cade let me wail on him until I tired.

I shoved him back and screamed, “I hate you. You’ve ruined me. You’ve ruined everything.”

“Any more anger, dollface?” He smirked, nestling into my neck like this was normal, loving behavior between us.

“There’s something wrong with you. I really think you need help,” I warned him. He needed someone to tell him.

“Maybe. But there’s something wrong with everybody.” His hands went from the counter to my hips. “If you want me to, I can find the problem in anyone for you. Nobody’s perfect.”

“Don’t come here and call me those names, like we have something, like you think the last month didn’t happen.”

“Oh, it happened,” he ground out. “I had to live through it without the person I love in my life. The person who makes my heart beat.”

“How can you say that after you told me you would let me go and let me be with someone else?”

“I still counted the days, the hours, the minutes, the seconds without you.” He admitted it as if that made everything better.

The tears that streamed down my face were ugly reminders that I couldn’t bottle up my feelings with him. “How could you leave me after that night? We . . . I thought you loved me, or at least liked me enough to stay. I fell in love with you, Cade. I fucking bled for you, showed you the inside of me and didn’t shine it up at all. I gave you every raw part of me, only for you to leave the very next day.”

“Izzy, I’m trying to protect you.” He shook his head, his own dark eyes glistening. “I thought it was right.”

“And now?”

“Well, now I’m sure.”

“Sure of what?” I asked even though it didn’t matter.

“Sure that I’ve changed the world enough. I’m sure that every family knows who you are.” He dragged a finger over the bracelet and I looked down to see UNTOUCHABLE etched on the gold now. “You’re safe, that you’re an Untouchable, and that you’re getting the best life you can.”

“What does that even mean?” I threw up my hands in frustration. “I was safe with you here!”

“No.” He shook his head. “How can you think that? You know my family. You know people will always be out to get me. They kidnapped you, Izzy. They—” He took a shaky breath and then paced away from me, only to pace back again. “You could have died there. That would have been on me.”

“No, it wouldn’t have! I hacked their files. Me. Not you.” I hit my chest in frustration, trying to make him understand.

“I should have been watching you! I should have protected you. Don’t you see?” He dragged one of his tattooed hands down his face, and I saw the pain there, the fear. “I could have lost you.”

“That wouldn’t have been your fault, Cade.” I didn’t know why I was consoling him, but I had to. He looked broken, tired, and just as depressed as me.

He pulled at his thick dark hair. “It would have been my fault, dollface. I was so consumed with you that I let my guard down. I let shit slip through the cracks. I wasn’t going to let that happen again. This country has made changes since then.”

I glanced at the television. We all saw the news. “You created a lot of havoc.”

“They should be happy I didn’t create more. And I had to leave you for a while to make sure that in that time, you were safe. I visited every family in the world that’s important. I’ve had conversations with them all. I’ve hacked every one of their bank accounts just to show them exactly what I’m capable of, to show them your value to me. They all know now.”

“Know what?” I asked with a hand on my hip.

“You’re mine. And if they even breathe an ounce of foul air in your direction, I will burn their country to the ground.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me you were doing that, Cade? Why make me believe you’d left? Why cut me off?” He needed a better excuse than wanting to protect me.

“Tell you?” He shrugged. “Until I was sure I could solidify your safety, Izzy, I couldn’t have you clouding my judgment. I love you too much. You were better off without me around and I needed my full attention on the priority, keeping you safe.”

I was furious he couldn’t have just shared his plan with me, so I shrugged and went for the jugular. “Maybe I still am better off. I don’t want a man who’s in and out of my life. It’s not like we ever established you would be. We were just having fun—”

“Is ‘fun’ me claiming you around the world?”

I poked his shoulder. “You can un-claim me.”

“Is it fun that you have half my savings in your bank account?”

My stomach dropped. I wasn’t sure if he’d been moving numbers around on accounts because he could or what. I didn’t think that was half of anything. “Half?” I squeaked. There were more than eight zeros behind my normal balance.

“Sure, baby. I’ll make more if you want, though.” He leaned in to lick my neck, and I shivered. I couldn’t deny him. My heart was beating too fast, my world suddenly stood still with him at the center of it, and the inkling of hope was bleeding out to become a huge puddle I couldn’t overlook.

“So what? I’m supposed to just forgive you?” I didn’t know how I would say no to him though and the way my hands had crept up to smooth his shirt, to feel his warmth under me, to feel the love of my life there when I thought I lost him. It wasn’t something I would let go of. I might have been emotional before, tried to hide who and what I was, but I couldn’t hide from this.

“Of course. I can tie you up if you want to fight about it. It’ll be more fun for me that way anyway, but we’re doing this, dollface.”

“I think I want to kill you,” I admitted. For the whiplash he’d given me at the very least. “The pain you’ve caused me . . . It’s either I die or you do.”

He laughed. The beautiful, cruel man who I loved cackled at my turmoil. “Baby, look how mad you got at me this month. But didn’t you feel alive?”

I hated that I did, that Cade made me feel every damn thing. He dragged his finger across my rib cage where he knew my tattoo was and then rubbed back and forth. “You need to change this Addict tattoo of yours and put under it, ‘Of life and Of Cade.’ I deserve it.”

“You don’t deserve anything,” I grumbled.

“Fine. Should I grovel more?” He smirked like he had a fucking sense of humor all of a sudden.

“More?”

“Well, you have half my savings, a new penthouse, roses every day that you throw away, and the title of an Untouchable. I didn’t stop caring for you even if I was gone, dollface. Even if I let you go, I was still going to feed you every day—”

I rolled my eyes but did have to tell him, “The office team thanks you for the subs, by the way.”

He chuckled. “But do you thank me?”

“No,” I sneered, trying not to laugh with him. “You’re a dick.”

“I know. You wrote it on my computer screens at work.”

“Yeah, well, maybe you should get that tattooed on you to match the one I got after what you called me.”

He glanced up as if he was considering it. “Would that count as part of my groveling?”

“Oh my God.” I shoved him to try to hide how having any of my words tattooed on him would turn me on.

He didn’t move at all. He leaned in and whispered, “I see that blush on your cheeks, pretty girl. Means me getting tattoos for you makes you wet, huh?”

“There’s something wrong with us. I shouldn’t even want to be near you right now.”

“We’re fucking volatile. And spontaneous and chaotic. It doesn’t make us bad or wrong, dollface.”

“It makes us hard to deal with, Cade.”

“Life without chaos would be boring, Izzy. Life without glitches and your bursts of anger and me seeing you go off . . . it’s unbearable.”

“Everyone’s working out the glitches for a smooth life!”

“Are you?” He cocked his head. “Or do you come to work every day looking for them, wanting to conquer them, wanting to wrangle them, and then you enjoy when they get out of control again and challenge you?”

“We’re not stable.”

“Of course we aren’t.” He shrugged and dragged a finger across my neck. “You want your stability with Gerald?”

“I don’t know.” I crossed my arms, just to piss him off. “Maybe he could give me that.”

“Yeah.” Then he bent at the knee and kneeled before me. “He’d wipe out your emotion, your beauty, your you.”

“What I feel isn’t always pretty, Cade. It had me wasted for a long time.”

He nodded as he said, softly and almost like he was mourning the thought, “Would you be happy if you could feel them?”

I took in a breath, and it was shaky, so damn shaky that I knew he saw my chest quivering. The fact that I didn’t hide it from him spoke volumes. “I’d try to be, and everyone would be happy for me.”

“When you fight those feelings the way you do, your body explodes into doing dumb shit, because a fireball isn’t meant to be contained. Let the real you breathe so everyone else can witness it.”

“I can’t lose you and experience that pain, Cade. Not again,” I whispered.

“You won’t,” he promised. “You never did. I was always watching. I may have thought I let you go but I couldn’t. I won’t. Never, Ms. Hardy. You’re my future wife.”

I laughed with tears in my eyes. “Not until you propose.”

He hummed low, and then he slid his hands under my shirt to slip my shorts and panties off. “I can’t do that for a while. I need to grovel some more first.”

And then his mouth was on me. I sobbed out with need for him.

“Just so we’re clear,” I moaned, “I want a lot of groveling. Right now, I still hate you.”

He chuckled into my pussy. “And I still love the way you hate me, dollface.”