Chapter 15

As promised, Nathaniel bought Kanan a box of cinnamon rolls from a local bakery downtown and secretly grabbed the hotdogs they enjoyed that night. They decided to spend the rest of the day at Nathaniel's house since they had no other plans. Upon arriving, they left the treats in the kitchen and headed upstairs to Nathaniel's bedroom. It was Kanan's first time in Nathaniel's room. He took in the minimalistic decor and neutral tones-a sharp contrast to Kanan's more extravagant taste in his room. Kanan sat at the edge of the bed, feeling the comfort and softness of the covers with his hands. He watched as Nathaniel removed his watch and hat. Nathaniel seemed to have forgotten that Kanan was in the room as he proceeded to take off his shirt, revealing his toned muscles underneath. While Kanan had seen Nathaniel shirtless before, having a romantic relationship added a new layer of intimacy to the sight.

"You're playing dangerous games," Kanan said, unable to tear his gaze away from Nathaniel's physique.

Nathaniel glanced at him, a mischievous look in his eyes as he held the shirt he intended to put on. "What can I say? I like seeing you flustered." He teased.

"Says the nervous one," Kanan replied with a playful grin.

"I admit, you do make me nervous. You also make my heart race, make me want to give you the world," Nathaniel approached Kanan. "You make me do things I never imagined."

"What if I told you I don't need the world," Kanan told him, his finger tracing the contour of Nathaniel's abdomen. "Just you," All he desired was Nathaniel's love and presence, nothing more.

"And here I thought I was the one playing dangerous games," Nathaniel chuckled, his breath hitched as Kanan's touch brought out a ticklish response.

Intrigued by the unexpected response, Kanan exclaimed, "You're ticklish!" Before Nathaniel could respond, Kanan seized the opportunity and began to tickle him, causing Nathaniel to burst into laughter. He tried to fend off Kanan's playful assault, collapsing into the bed and attempting to shield himself. As they playfully wrestled on the bed, Nathaniel's laughter filled the room, his body squirming beneath Kanan's touch. Caught up in the moment, Kanan straddled Nathaniel as he aimed for his weak spot. Their laughter softened into gentle smiles, and Nathaniel reached out to grasp Kanan's wrist to still his movements.

"Your smile is everything," Kanan said, admiring him. Nathaniel loosened his grip. With a tender touch, Kanan brushed Nathaniel's hair from his forehead, their breaths slowing as the energy of their playful antics shifted.

"I would say you're my everything, but it sounded cooler in my head," Nathaniel seemed to have a knack for saying meaningful words without feeling embarrassed, leaving Kanan speechless and blushing with his words. "As much as I love having you straddling me, I'm enjoying the view, but my body will betray my mind."

"I'm enjoying the view as well," Kanan teasingly rocked his hips back and forth. Nathaniel gripped the covers, resisting the urge to seize the moment. Kanan got up, releasing Nathaniel and himself from the intimate urges.

"It's not that I don't want to," Nathaniel said. "I want nothing more than to pounce on you right now, but I don't want the sexual part of our relationship to happen so soon. I want it to be more special." Nathaniel wanted to nurture their relationship more before leaping.

Kanan grasped Nathaniel's intentions. He sought to cherish Kanan's worth beyond the physicality of their relationship. Despite his teasing, Kanan had no objections; deep down, he shared the same beliefs that it was wise to allow their relationship to mature. For them, it wasn't a matter of convenience but a choice. So, they decided to wait patiently, savoring each moment of growth and connection, until they were both ready.

"I may have won at life," Kanan said.

"When that time comes," Nathaniel whispered in his ears. "I'm not going to hold back."

"Put your shirt on," Kanan tossed Nathaniel's crumbled shirt at him, trying to hide his embarrassment.

~~

Kanan savored each bite of the cinnamon roll, finally indulging in the food they had bought as they relaxed downstairs. "Where's Emily?" Kanan inquired, hoping to hear about what had happened.

"She's out shopping for a few things for her photo shoot," Nathaniel responded, adding, "She mentioned wanting to discuss the details with you." The reminder jogged Kanan's memory. "Emily will be staying here for a while. Her dad's being an ass again." Nathaniel continued. "I dropped her off at The View and took care of an order I had today."

"You know, your family seems quite complicated." Kanan finally voiced the thoughts that had been swirling in his mind. It wasn't just Nathaniel's family that seemed tangled in strife. Emily and her parents seemed to be in the same predicament. Despite feeling somewhat excluded from what was happening, he wouldn't force them to tell him about it. He finished his cinnamon roll, getting some napkins to wipe his hands.

Nathaniel sighed. "What can I say? They hate my guts for various reasons, and Emily is in the crossfire. Though it's mostly her dad making things difficult for her." Nathaniel explained. "We're the...what do you call it? The black sheep of the family."

"Yeah, the odd ones out," Kanan added. "And what about her mother?"

"I can't decide if she's the worst in this situation." He confessed. "She could care less about what that a**hole does. It's always been like that. She ignores her husband's actions and holds a grudge against me. Her sentiment is the same as her husband's. If it means keeping Emily away, they'll do anything."

As the weight of Nathaniel's words settled in, Kanan couldn't help but feel the gravity of the situation. It wasn't just a matter of petty family disagreements; something deeper was at play. "What could make them hate you so much?" Kanan asked, venturing cautiously.

Nathaniel's eyes narrowed, his expression darkened, "For money and the truth." He replied, voice laced with bitterness and regret. "For not siding with them." Kanan's heart sank as the truth unfolded before him. Nathaniel's family held a disdain for him, driven not by petty grievances but by wealth and his unwillingness to conform to their manipulative schemes. It was a bitter realization that they band against him for reasons shallow and selfish. "That's why I no longer interact with them."

As Kanan observed, Emily was the sole family member he interacted with. Whether engaging in a shared interest, seeking refuge in moments of vulnerability, or simply enjoying each other company. As their conversation unfolded, shedding light on Nathaniel's life. Seizing the opportunity, he delved deeper. "You mentioned before that this house wasn't something you thought you needed. That you were moving out soon." Kanan recalled, his tone laced with interest.

"Ah," Nathaniel remembered he had said that. "I'm grateful for it, but I don't think I'll live here for long. It's too big for just one person." He admitted, his gaze wandering around the familiar surroundings. "Funny enough, this place was my refuge when everything started going downhill," He added. "I've been considering it," The idea of moving out still lingered in his mind. "Can I move in with you?" His words carry a playful air, yet with a touch of consideration. "I like your apartment. It feels like a true home that's lived in."

Intrigued by Nathaniel's plans, Kanan asked, "What do you plan to do with the house once you decide on moving out?"

"Should I sell it or maybe rent it out?" Nathaniel deliberated, not making a hasty decision for a house of this size and glamor. "But the thought of selling it..." His voice trailed off with a hint of reluctance.

"If you don't mind the small space when the time comes, let's try it."

Their conversations often gravitate towards serious matters concerning their relationship, a break from their usual lighthearted talks. However, this time, the focus was slowly on Nathaniel, revealing a deeper level of who he is. Kanan remembered when Nathaniel seemed like a mystery, a puzzle waiting to be solved, wondering if one day he would unveil his inner thoughts and feelings. While Kanan realized they had a long journey, this conversation marked a meaningful step from how far they'd come.

"I look forward to that day," Nathaniel expressed.

"This is the first time you've opened up about your family situation," Kanan observed. "Honestly, I never thought you would."

"There was a time when I hated the thought of them. I still do, but it's different now." Nathaniel admitted. "Now, I can talk about it, vent my frustrations, and even curse them because that's how I feel. By holding back, I avoided confrontation with them and how I felt. Besides, I want to be 100% authentic with you."

"Thank you for telling me,"

~~

Once again, Nathaniel had found himself grateful that it was Kanan he had fallen for. Experiencing Kanan's confession and sharing their first kiss filled him with overwhelming joy. Despite enduring the pain of losing someone dear, Kanan continued to smile and press forward in life. The continuous task of seeking adventures in life was a tribute to the life they couldn't live with the one they had lost. It was truly inspiring. Nathaniel marveled at Kanan's ability to face life with courage despite the pain beneath his smile. As they talked, Nathaniel experienced an ease he had never experienced before. For the first time, Nathaniel could speak without the crushing weight of anxiety in his chest. With Kanan, there was a comfort that gave him the confidence to challenge anything.

Reflecting on their journey-the confession of feelings, their first kiss- it was all amazing. Nathaniel felt an instinct to protect him, something he once was incapable of doing. Meeting Kanan's younger brother reminded him of a familial relationship he could no longer have, yet it stirred no sadness in him. Kaelan was just as Kanan described: an overprotective younger brother. The contrast between the brothers was evident, yet they shared one common trait: their outspoken nature, while Ayana's gentle demeanor served as the perfect counterbalance to Kaelan's personality. Despite Kaelan's words, there was no malice behind them. Nathaniel was grateful for how effortlessly they welcomed him into their circle. As he conversed with Kaelan, he learned a few things about Kanan through his brother's stories.

"Just the guy I wanted to see," Emily exclaimed, entering with bags from her eventful shopping trip. Kanan took the opportunity to lend her a hand as she settled in, her eyes lighting up when she spotted the cinnamon rolls. Emily eagerly requested one, quickly washing her hands before eating. "I've been meaning to discuss the photo shoot." Nathaniel saw it as a positive sign she could proceed with it. Something that should've happened long ago, but unforeseen circumstances had previously prevented it. "I'll be making full use of this house, and Nathaniel will be helping me with setting up."She announced, catching Nathaniel off guard. However, he didn't mind and welcomed the opportunity to support her, curious to hear more about her plans.

Setting aside her half-eaten roll, Emily continued excitedly. "Let me show you what I got." She wiped her hands and then dived into the shopping bags, revealing an array of hair accessories, props, and clothing items. She shared inspirational photos from her phone, outlying the vision behind her dual shoots. The sight made Nathaniel happy, seeing that Emily didn't let what happened to her keep her down.

Emily expressed concern, "I hope I'm not being a bother."

"I don't mind," Kanan reassured her. "I'm not the best photographer, and I did make a promise. I should be concerned about not taking the best photos after you prepared so much."

"I can't thank you enough," Emily replied gratefully.

"I'll thank him in your stead," Nathaniel said Kanan glanced at Nathaniel with a knowing look.

"I'm doing this because I want to," Kanan said.

"Now, I just need to figure out my hair and makeup. Which I should've done first." She chuckled nervously.

"If you don't mind, my brother's girlfriend could help you," Kanan suggested.

"Really?" Emily said excitedly. "What would we do without you?" Nathaniel wondered the same thing. What would his life be right now if he hadn't met Kanan?