The Wrong Quarterback: Chapter 22

There was a knock on my door, and a smile was instantly on my lips thinking it was Parker. I swung it open, expecting his gorgeous grin, but my stomach dropped when I saw Gray standing there instead.

He stared at me with an intensity that made me uncomfortable. It was something that I’d wanted not that long ago, but now it felt all wrong. “Casey,” he breathed, a trace of desperation in his voice. “I miss you. And I’m willing to do anything, anything, to get you back.”

I bit down on my lip hard, keeping my face neutral, refusing to let him see the ripple of uncertainty stirring in my chest. “Gray, this isn’t⁠—”

“Please, Casey.” His voice softened, searching. “Remember how it used to be? All those good times we had? You were the one I turned to for everything. And I was that for you too. Don’t you remember?”

My pulse quickened, but I pushed the memories back, steeling myself against the way his words tried to dig under my skin.

He took a step forward, his voice barely a murmur. “I can be that person again. The one you needed, the one who’s known you since the beginning. I haven’t had a drink since that night. I won’t have a drink. I’m going to do everything to get you back.”

“Gray, I need you to leave,” I said, my voice coming out firmer than I felt.

But he didn’t move, his expression twisting in something that almost looked like pain. “You think Parker is gonna love you like I do?”

The words stung, lacing their way under my skin, but I pushed them down, my hand gripping the edge of the door.

I pressed my lips together, fighting the knot tightening in my chest.

He leaned toward me. “He can never love you like me, because he’ll never know you like me.”

I stared at him for a long, tense minute, and then without another word, I closed the door in his face. Leaning back against it, my mind was a mess of memories.

It was hard to say goodbye to memories that had once been held in strict reverence in my mind, the only things that had kept me going in years filled with nothing but pain.

But no matter what Gray wanted, Parker’s glow was too strong. Gray wanted to pull me back into the past, but I didn’t live there anymore. I’d learned that what I thought were highlights, sparks of brightness that were all because of Gray…they were actually nothing but shadows.

Swallowing the tangle of emotions clawing at my chest, I pushed myself off the door. I needed clarity, I needed to feel grounded again. I grabbed my keys, knowing there was only one place to go when my heart felt torn apart like this.

It was time to talk to Ben.

“You look suspiciously rosy-cheeked,” Jace quipped as we walked into the locker room. “I wonder why that is.”

I grinned. I wasn’t going to deny it. Well, I wasn’t going to say I was rosy-cheeked. Because what the hell was that? But I was supremely happy, like someone had stuck me with fucking happy juice and this was my new state of being.

“What’s the opposite of dickmatized?” Matty asked, leaning his arm on Jace’s shoulder as they both gave me smug smiles.

“Pussy-conquered?” Jace offered, cocking his head as he thought about it.

“Oh, yes. That’s a good one,” Matty said, giving Jace a fist bump.

“I don’t like this,” I said, pointing to the two of them. “When you two gang up on me.”

“It’s because you’re a little scary now, QB. You’ve got that crazy look in your eyes. We’ve got to shore up our defenses,” explained Jace.

“What?”

“Just in case it’s catching, he means,” said Matty. “We didn’t sign up for…what was the word again?”

“Pussy-conquered. We didn’t sign up for that,” supplied Jace helpfully.

I scoffed. “I’m pretty sure that’s not a word.”

“I’m pretty sure that your picture is the definition of it in the dictionary,” said Matty.

I threw my jockstrap at him, and he ducked, laughing when it smacked the wall behind him.

“I’m just saying, Matty. If you let your little stalker get within ten feet of you…maybe you will get a little crazy too.”

Matty shuddered like that was his worst nightmare. “Take that back right now.”

“I don’t know, Matthew. She might be just the kind of crazy you need in your life.”

Matty snarled, and Jace and I both snickered.

Still laughing, I reached into my bag for my phone, my smile fading when I saw the text from Casey, canceling our dinner plans.

“Uh oh, he’s not rosy cheeked anymore,” whispered Jace.

I scoffed at him and grabbed my bag. “I’ll see you guys later,” I told them, leaving the room to a chorus of “pussy-conquered” chants.

Pulling up my phone, I checked my Find My Friends app and saw that she was in her dorm room—Jace’s stalking tips were actually very useful.

So far there had been a different girl manning the desk every time I’d come by—thank fuck—and this one just gaped at me as I walked by. Once I got to Casey’s door, I pounded on the wood, tapping my finger against my leg impatiently because I needed to see her.

Five hours was too long. It would probably be too much to ask her to sit in the stands during practice, right?

The door opened, and Casey appeared, her red-rimmed eyes telling me that my baby was having a tough day.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” I demanded. “Let me fix it.”

She wiped at her eyes. “I just went to see Ben, and…it’s hard. It never seems to get easier.” A tear slid down her cheek, and I growled as I pushed my way inside, scooping her into my arms as I walked over to her bed and sat down. I continued to cradle her in my lap as she buried her head in my neck and sobbed.

“I know about grief,” I murmured. “The kind that eats you from the inside out. The kind that you don’t think you can escape from. When I lost my dad, I used to go sit in his office. I’d sit in the same chair that I’d always used when he was working late into the night, and I’d wanted to hang out with him. And I think I was waiting. I think a part of me thought that maybe he’d walk in. And he’d grin when he saw me. And then we’d just talk while he worked, about everything and anything. I kept sitting in that chair for a month until it really hit me…he was gone.”

She pulled her face from my neck and stared at me somberly. “I’m sorry about your dad, Parker,” she said quietly as her gaze searched mine.

“Me too, baby. Me too.”

I pressed a kiss to her lips because I couldn’t help it, and she kissed me back with a breadth of emotion I hadn’t expected.

“Next time you want to go, I’ll take you,” I murmured against her lips. “I don’t want you to go by yourself anymore. I don’t want you to be alone.”

She looked away, her lower lip trembling. “It’s a long drive, and you’re so busy. I’d never⁠—”

I gently grabbed her chin and made her look at me. “Don’t go alone. I’m never too busy for you. You don’t get this yet, but you’re my number one priority. There’s nothing more important than making you happy. Nothing.”

Casey was looking at me like I was crazy, and I got it. She didn’t understand yet that I’d looked at her and knew that the most important piece of my soul…the one I’d always known was missing—it was in her.

“When you say that, I don’t know what to say. When you say that…it feels dangerous.” She closed her eyes. “My brother was Mama’s favorite child…and I was okay with that. I really was. Because he was my favorite too. He was popular and handsome; everyone who met him thought he was the best. He was the best.” She opened her eyes to look at me again, as if it was important to her that I understood what she was saying. “That meant, though, that I wasn’t seen very much. I was the afterthought in our family, the afterthought in school, the afterthought in…life. And then when Gray did that…” She bit down on her lip, trying not to cry anymore. “When he did that, it was just a reminder of who I am. A nobody,” she whispered.

I opened my mouth to vehemently reject what she was saying, but she placed a trembling finger to my lips. “So when you, a person who literally outshines everything and everyone, tries to tell me that you see me, or that I’m important…or any of the other crazy things that keep coming out of your mouth…it’s hard for me to believe. The sun was never meant to be with the stars.”

I snorted then, and she looked at me, shocked. “The sun is a star, baby. Not to cut you off. A bunch of those stars are in fact brighter than the sun…they’re just farther away. We’re both stars, Casey.”

“You kind of are a nerd,” she joked. “Are you sure that you actually need tutoring?”

I grinned, because if she only knew.

“Promise me that you’ll tell me next time you want to go,” I pushed.

She bit down on her lip, and I knew she wasn’t going to.

“One day, baby…” I whispered.

“What?”

“One day you’re going to wake up, and you’re going to realize you’re safe with me. That out of anyone you’ve met in your life, anyone you’ll ever meet in your life, I’m the person you can trust.”

“You’re doing it again,” she murmured.

“Doing what?” I asked with a grin, because I was pretty sure I knew what she was going to say.

“You’re talking crazy,” she said, hovering by my lips, so I had no choice but to kiss her until she couldn’t breathe.

I love you was trying to burst out of my chest, but I held it in.

I’d said it to her when we had sex, but something told me saying it again right then…it would probably drive her over the edge.

Soon, I told myself. Soon I’d be able to say it whenever I wanted.

And she would believe me.

The night was still, the parking lot empty and quiet under the glow of the streetlights as I walked up to her car. Her car was what you called…a piece of shit. It already sputtered when she started it, and every time she hit a bump, it rattled like it was going to fall apart. It was barely hanging on, which tonight was very helpful. Casey got into this car every time and expected it wouldn’t start.

Tomorrow, her expectations would be met.

I popped the hood, glancing around to make sure no one was around to get curious. I’d spent enough hours working in a mechanic’s shop back in high school to know my way around an engine, even if my boss had been a dick. Loosening the negative cable on the battery terminal was easy—just a quick twist, and it wobbled enough to disconnect. It would look solid from above, like nothing was off. I grinned, then reached for the ignition fuse and pulled it out for good measure, pocketing it. That’d buy me enough time to make sure she wasn’t heading to the cemetery alone again.

It wasn’t healthy for her to go there alone. She was used to handling everything by herself, but that didn’t mean I had to let her take off whenever she felt like burying herself in that place. Not without me there, to ground her, to keep her steady.

As soon as she trusted me, I’d get her a new car. One that didn’t look like it was one pothole away from falling apart. My baby deserved better than this shitty safety hazard.

For now, though, I needed her safe, and I wasn’t above a little sabotage if that’s what it took.

I closed the hood with a firm click, straightening up as I looked up at the night sky, a grin spreading over my face.

I slid into the driver’s seat, turning the key and…nothing. The engine didn’t even try to turn over. Groaning, I smacked the steering wheel and leaned my forehead against it, trying to think.

I didn’t have the money to fix this junker right now, and calling Mama for help wasn’t going to get me anywhere—even if she actually answered. I sat there for a moment, tapping my fingers on the wheel, feeling the knot in my stomach tighten.

Finally I got out, accepting that snack shopping was not going to happen. Right as I’d slammed my door shut, I heard the rumble of an engine, and Parker’s truck pulled up next to me. He rolled down his window, eyebrow raised, that infuriatingly adorable smirk tugging at his lips.

“What’s up, baby?” he called, his voice all teasing, but there was concern in his eyes.

I sighed, leaning back against my car. “It won’t start,” I groaned.

Parker hopped out of his truck and strode over, glancing under the hood with that casual confidence that always seemed to cling to him. “Let’s try a jump,” he said, already grabbing the cables from his truck.

I popped the hood, watching him work, his movements smooth and familiar as he connected the cables. He slid into my car, turning the key a few times. But the engine didn’t so much as sputter. He turned to me, shrugging, that grin of his back in place. “Well, I gave it my best shot, but looks like your girl here is just not having it.”

I sighed, frustration building up. It wasn’t the biggest deal not to have a car, but it was definitely going to be annoying asking for rides. Parker nudged me gently with his shoulder. “Hey, don’t stress. I’ll drive you. Consider me your personal chauffeur.”

He flashed me that sexy smile, the one that somehow melted all my worries, every time. The words hovered on my tongue, the words I knew he wanted to hear, but I kissed him instead.

“You’re way too sweet, you know that?” I murmured against his lips.

He just shrugged, a mischievous spark lighting up his blue eyes as he opened the truck door for me. “You keep telling me that, baby, and it might go to my head.”

I got in, and he drove me to dinner, and I didn’t think about my car…even once.