Refusing Her

Stefan

The silence is weirdly nice. It reminds me of those nights when we wouldn’t talk and instead just sat in silence with our own thoughts.

“I never wanted to reject you, Harlyn. I had heard my parents speaking, and I was worried about how they would react if we were mates. That is why I stopped coming to our spot. I thought it would be easier on us both if I had pushed you out. I only found out when you returned that what I had heard was wrong.” I admit.

“What did you hear?” she asks.

“You couldn’t be my mate, and I would be forced to reject you in front of the entire Kingdom. I didn’t want you to face that, So I rejected you, shouted at you, hurt you, and I’m sorry.” All this was caused by me; I can’t even blame my parents.

I could have spoken to them and asked them about the conversation. There was nothing to stop me from asking why they had said that and still acting like Harlyn wasn’t my mate.

“I always knew no one wanted me in the kingdom, so it doesn’t surprise me,” she whispers.

“No! Harlyn, my parents didn’t think that. My mother actually admitted you were their first choice for me. They were so sure I would choose you, and the only person against you was your father,” I explain. I’m unsure how he will react now that the dark magic is gone.

I know he hated that Harlyn wasn’t blessed with a wolf. He had strong views that humans shouldn’t mix with werewolves. No doubt that is what the magic used to build hate.

His hate for her not having a werewolf.

“Did you and everyone else know about my dad?” She lifts her head to look at me.

“No, I just found out, and from what I know, not even Samuel knew. Only mine and your parents knew,” I explain. “Look, none of this will be easy. This isn’t like you just found out your dad isn’t your dad. You found out that Wayne knew as well, you just got your wolf back. Too much is happening at once for your mind to process it. Just remember, whatever you choose, everyone will support you,” I say, watching as she nods.

“I don’t think Wayne was my mate.”

I fight the urge to roll my eyes. He wasn’t, but the magic and Wayne’s constant pushing made her think he was. I need to remember that. The feelings she had for him might have been real, but for most, it was the magic.

She couldn’t control that, I saw it myself when Wayne made her look at him and he spoke, he controlled her mind.

“You will know if he’s your mate, there wouldn’t be any doubt. That’s how you know for sure if he’s your mate or not.” That’s the best I can answer. “We should get back.” I have a feeling Wayne will send out a search party. He doesn’t trust me, and I can’t exactly blame him.

“Soon. I know as soon as I go back it all starts again, just five more minutes.” Her words are whispered against my neck as she stays cuddled against me. Nodding, I agree. If I push her back there and she isn’t ready, she will run again.

I would have rushed her back, but Samuel is there with the pups so I know they are safe. She looks up at me, and I panic slightly, seeing her expression; it’s different, and I am now worried she’s slipped back.

“Stefan, why are you here?” she stares at me, confused, and I laugh. I mean, why did you come here? You never leave the kingdom.”

She’s right. I don’t, I’ve maybe twice, and those were to sort business.

“I came to check Thorin was okay, to ask if you wanted to attend court against your father.” I also came to win you back, not that I can say that.

Her eyes glance around. “Is that all?” She looks at me briefly.

My mouth opens to talk. Then I close it again. I can’t just tell her the truth. “There are other reasons that I won’t discuss until I know you are thinking straight and won’t act on impulse.”

Right now I’m worried if I say I came to win her back, she will let me in purely because her mind isn’t in a sane place. Either that, or she will start hating me again.

She moves, and her lips press against mine, I almost forget and pull her to me, but stop myself. Grasping her shoulders I push her back slightly.

“Harlyn.” Sighing, I consider how to word this.

“It’s fine, sorry.” She goes to move and I keep hold of her.

“What I’ve done was wrong, I shouldn’t have slept with you, or even kissed you. All that did was add more confusion to your mind,” I was a jerk, and hadn’t considered how it would impact her.

“I’m not confused now.” She looks at me, waiting for me to agree.

“Days ago, you were madly in love with Wayne and about to marry him; you hated me,” I explain, hoping she realises what I mean.

“Right, and the bond came back. You said you loved me.”

I nod at her words. “That wasn’t a lie, but me letting this happen now wouldn’t be right. Me sleeping with you that day you left was wrong. Until you’re totally sure of how you feel, I won’t do it.” Which is extremely hard considering we’re both naked right now, and she’s wrapped around me.

“I’m not saying what I said was a lie. You admitted yourself that you feel confused, so give yourself time to consider it all, and then yes, I will agree.” I smile at her, and she nods. Her body relaxes against mine, and we stay quiet. Five minutes later, I decided to force her to go back.

“We need to go back, Harlyn.” Staying here isn’t going to help. I glance down and see her asleep. Great. “Harlyn.” I nudge her and she only moves closer to me. Standing, I walk back to where I left our clothes.

I hadn’t considered this. By the time I found her, she had been in her wolf form for over twelve hours, which would have drained all her energy. Hours later, I see the clothes. Putting on my trousers, I wrap my shirt around her and continue the walk back to where Wayne’s pack is.