First Bitten: Chapter 14

“Aww, Alex, you should have seen Sol when he dressed up as Kylie at our Halloween party last year. He wore the gold hot pants and everything. It was hilarious. And he could have easily passed for a woman.” Erin laughs heartily from her seat beside me, and reaches over and pinches Sol’s cheek as he sits adjacent to her at the end of the table. “He looked so gorgeous. I’m gonna bring the photos with me next time I come.”

“Don’t you dare!” Sol warns, laughing.

“You dressed as Kylie?” I lean forward to look down the table at Sol, raising a playful eyebrow.

He screws his face up. “I left it ‘til the last minute to get my costume and it was all the shop had left … and anyway … ” he looks back to Erin, “it’s not my fault I’ve been blessed with great features.” He casts his hand over his face, and looks at me again and winks.

I laugh. He’s so cheeky.

“Womanly features aren’t something you should brag about,” Nathan quips.

Sol pulls a face at him. Nathan grins smugly back. They’re like a pair of kids at times.

I rest back in my chair and look over at Nathan who’s sitting opposite me. “So what did you go as?”

He looks at me for a long second before answering, “A Viking.”

I smile, impressed with his choice. You can’t beat a burly Viking. But now all I have in my mind is a picture of Nathan dressed as a Viking. I mentally shake myself out of it.

“Jack dressed as Frank Sinatra,” Erin says, pulling my attention to her. “Cal was Jack Sparrow and I was Catwoman, not that I could fit into that costume nowadays.” She juts out her lower lip, patting her heavily pregnant stomach.

“Well, I still think you look lovely,” Cal says smiling at her.

“Brown nose,” Sol jokes.

Erin playfully smacks Sol on the arm.

I can see the obvious connection between Erin and Cal, and for a fleeting moment I really envy what they have.

Erin has been a complete surprise, and for that matter, so has Cal. He’s actually being nice. Well, not yet to me directly, but he has made eye contact a few times and he did sort of smile in my general direction when he arrived, but I was standing next to Sol at the time, so he could have been smiling at him.

I’m guessing it’s Erin’s influence on him. She’s nice and very warm and friendly. I instantly liked her. She’s the type of person I would have been friends with in my old life. She’s been incredibly friendly toward me from the offset, which must have been difficult for her knowing how Cal feels about me, which is a view I’m a hundred percent sure he will have aired to her. He’s not exactly one to keep his feelings secret.

I was expecting Erin to come in with an already inbuilt air of hostility toward me, wearing the same look of distaste as Cal does whenever he’s forced to be around me. I had painted her in my mind to be as abrasive as he is, but she is nothing like that at all.

The moment she walked through the door, she honed in on me straightaway, wearing a huge toothy smile, all dark brown eyes and long black hair swishing about. She practically oozed kindness and not the fake kind either. You know how some people just have a natural, genuine charm about them, well Erin has that. She reminds me of Carrie in that respect.

Carrie.

And as quickly as her name filters through my mind, so appears the familiar squeeze on my heart, the chill blanketing my skin, the sting of tears at the back of my eyes.

Carrie would have loved being here at this dinner, she would have loved all of them, and they would all have loved her.

I take a silent, deep breath and count to ten, forcing myself back to normal. Well, as normal as I can get.

I glance at Erin, then over at Cal. Visually, they look well suited, but their personalities are worlds apart. She’s warm and friendly. He’s cold and not so friendly.

All I can think is that Erin sees something in Cal that no one else sees, or he allows them to see, which has to be something good, right?

And because of how lovely and genuine a person Erin is, I have to consider the fact maybe Cal isn’t as bad a person as I thought, that my initial instinct could have been wrong. It’s not the first time I’ve been wrong about someone, take Eddie for instance.

It’s obviously just around me, or should I say with me, that Cal has issues, which is understandable.

I tune back into the conversation. Jack’s talking. He’s telling us about Dave, an old farming mate of his, who he ran into at Tesco’s this morning. I stop listening again the moment I hear the word ‘fertiliser’.

I steal a quick glance at Nathan. His eyes are on Jack and he’s absentmindedly picking at the food left on his plate with his fork. He looks relaxed, happy, and incredibly handsome in only the way he can. Seriously, if anyone else dressed like Nathan does, people would be handing them money in the street. Still, my heart does a little flip-flop.

How is it that all the things that irritated me about him a week ago now have my body fizzing on sight? Sets my heart beating just that bit faster? Makes my head go light every moment he happens to cast a glance my way? Makes me want to blurt out every thought and feeling I’ve ever had for him as I throw myself begging into his arms?

Stop Alex. You have to stop these thoughts. Remember what Jack said to you a few hours ago. Just keep reminding yourself of that.

I did worry that Jack might tell Nathan I have feelings for him but so far he hasn’t, and I don’t think he will. I don’t think it’s his style.

I know Jack is only looking out for me, and I appreciate it, I really do, but it’s all so easier said than done. The second Nathan walked through the door a few hours ago, I was lost to him again, all my resolve gone, just like that. My brain seized up and left me to the mercy of my hormones. And all I want is to be around him despite the all-engulfing, infuriating, tangled way he always leaves me feeling.

Nathan looks at me unexpectedly, catching me staring. I quickly look away, focussing my attention onto Jack.

I know he’s still looking at me. I can feel his quizzical stare. I ignore the temptation to look back at him, pick up my glass and take a sip of my wine for something to do.

I put my glass back down on the table. Nathan shifts his position in his seat. His foot brushes against the bare skin on my leg under the table. Heat sears, almost painfully, up my leg. I wish I’d worn my jeans now, not my shorts. Did he do that on purpose? No, why would he? To get my attention for some reason, maybe?

I look at him.

He smiles and mouths, ‘Sorry.’

I smile back. It feels awkward and clumsy.

With shaky fingers, I pick my wine up again and take a big gulp, then another. It coats my insides like warm honey. But still, my leg is burning from his touch, it’s kindling, like wood crackling white.

Every single time Nathan touches me, I get that feeling of electricity sparking, and now I know I don’t feel like that because I’m a Vârcolac, I feel it because of him. It’s like all my feelings are imploding at once. Nathan’s touch can set off lightning bolts to strike under my skin. It’s exhausting, he’s burning me out. I’ve never in all my life had a reaction to anyone like I do him.

I know it’s just chemical. The intensity and level of my feelings probably do have something to do with the changes I’ve been through. My body is so screwed up it doesn’t know its left from its right anymore, which is why I know these feelings for Nathan will go as soon as I sort myself out.

Erin reaches over and picks up my plate, which is still bearing half the meal Jack made, and sits it atop her own empty plate.

“I’ll take them,” I say, taking both our plates from her hands. “You stay there and take it easy.”

She smiles gratefully at me and says, “Thanks.”

I go around the table collecting all the plates. As I approach Nathan, my heart starts to up its tempo. Heat is practically radiating off me. He looks up at me as he hands me his plate. “Thanks,” he says, low.

I mutter something incoherent and quickly move away, carrying the plates over to sink.

I will get past this. I will stop feeling like this.

“Who’s up for some dessert?” Jack asks, an enticing tone to his voice, as I take my seat back at the table. “It’s Lemon Torte with Jersey Cream.”

There’s collective and very enthusiastic yeses from Erin and Sol.

“None for me, thanks,” I say quietly.

“I’ve got to put the horses in for the night, dad,” Nathan says, getting to his feet. “Save me some for later.”

“Yeah, me too,” Cal adds. “I’ll go give Nate a hand.” Cal gets up and kisses Erin on the top of her head. “Won’t be long, babe.”

I end up with some dessert. Jack was insistent; said I need to put some meat on my skinny bones. I’ve never thought of myself as skinny before, but he is right, I do look a tad on the thin side. I’ve lost a fair bit of weight since I’ve been here and I don’t look good for it. Still, I can’t seem to eat the dessert. I just pick at it, forking tiny amounts into my mouth at a time.

I think it was a race between Sol and Erin as to who could finish first as their plates are cleared in no time. That’s typical of Sol, though, and Erin is eating for two after all.

I glance at Erin’s pregnant stomach. There’s a tiny baby in there. I feel a sharp stab of envy. Erin is doing the one thing I’m never going to be able to do. Well, not unless I want to create an abomination, that is.

“When’s your baby due?” I ask Erin.

“Thirtieth of September,” she answers. She wipes up a bit of left-over cream from her plate with her finger and licks it off. “I’ve got just over five weeks left.”

“Not long then.” I smile.

“Nope.”

“Do you know what you’re having?”

She shakes her head, smiling. “We wanted a surprise.” A big yawn escapes her. “Sorry,” she says, covering her mouth with her hand.

“You tired, love?” Jack asks.

She pushes her chair back, allowing her to stretch her legs out. “Yeah, it just came over me all of a sudden. I’ll go get Cal, tell him I’m ready to go home. I hope you don’t mind me leaving straight after dinner.”

“Don’t be daft,” Jack chides good-naturedly. “You’ve got to take good care of yourself and my grandchild.” He smiles warmly “I’ll go get Cal for you,” I say getting up. “Save your legs.” Really, I could do with the walk and fresh air after all that food.

“You sure you don’t mind?” she asks.

“Course not.” I pull my cardigan on.

I head straight for the stables, thinking they should have Honor and Hope out of the paddock by now. I’m just near the front of the barn, probably only about fifty feet away from the stables, when I hear them talking. And I don’t what it is that stops me from moving or why I expanded my hearing in the first place, but what I’m hearing isn’t exactly filling me with confidence …

“Nate, you need to think about what you’re going to do about Alex. Just be serious and think about it for a minute. You can’t keep her hidden away here forever.”

“Why not? She’s safe here.”

“I disagree. I think it’s only a matter of time before she’s discovered by them, and you know what’ll happen to you, to all of us, when they find her here. Alex being here puts us all in danger, and I’ve got Erin and the baby to think about.”

“They won’t find Alex because they’re not looking for her. They don’t even know she exists.”

“It’s just a matter of time, Nate, just a matter of time.” Sigh. “You really don’t have many options.”

“So what do you propose I do, Cal? Throw her out into the streets, let her fend for herself. That’d be plain fucking stupid and you know it. I might as well just deliver her to their doorstep.”

Silence.

“Please tell me you’re not serious.” Nathan sounds angry.

“Just hear me out,” Cal’s tone is mild but forced.

The hairs on the back of my neck prickle, sending a shiver running down my spine.

“No,” Nathan says.

“Just listen for a minute before you start kicking off. If you give Alex to the Originals, if you give them the one thing they’ve wanted for the last four hundred years, you’ll be a fucking hero in their eyes. There’d be no comeback for you killing the arsehole who changed her in the first place, and we’d all be safe. There’d probably even be a reward in it for you.”

“Money? Jesus Christ, Cal, do you actually have any comprehension of what you’re actually suggesting I do?” Nathan’s voice is full of incredulity. Well, at least that’s what I think it sounds like and what I’m really hoping it is. “You want me to actually sell Alex to them?!”

“No.” Cal’s voice breaks ever so slightly. I hear him swallow down and the increase in his heartbeat tells me he’s lying. “That’s not what I’m suggesting at all.”

“Yes, it is.”

“No, it’s not. This is about all of us – dad, Sol, Erin, the baby – about our lives. You know what the Vârcolacs are capable of and what you’ve got us into by saving her. Don’t get me wrong, I like Alex, I do, but … ”

“No, you don’t. You don’t have any fucking regard for her whatsoever.”

Sigh. “Fine, I don’t like Alex, but that’s not the point … ”

“It’s completely the point.”

“Fucking hell, Nate!” Cal sounds exasperated. “What is it with her? If I didn’t know better I’d think you’d … ” Silence. “Have you?”

“No.”

“But you want to.”

“We’re done talking.”

I hear Nathan’s footsteps move across the floor and the stable door bangs shut. It opens quickly again as Cal follows him. I slide inside the darkened barn, pressing my back up against the brick wall and hold my breath.

“Nathan, wait.”

“I don’t wanna hear it, Cal, seriously.”

“Just stop a minute, will you?”

Nathan stops walking. “What?” There is nothing in his tone that’s interested.

“If you’ve got feelings for Alex, then this all makes a little bit more sense, and I get it, I do. She’s a stunner but you know nothing can ever come of it.”

“I don’t have feelings for Alex. I feel responsible for her, that’s all.” Silence. “You know, Cal, when you come out with ridiculous shit like this is the time when I wonder just how the fuck we’re related at all.”

My heart drops down to the cold, hard ground. Bitter tears bite at my throat.

“Nice, bro, thanks.” Silence. “Nate, you know I’m just worried about us all, worried what could happen if they find out about her.”

“They won’t, so nothing will happen.”

“Fine.” Sigh. “Just say you’ll consider what I’m saying.”

“Consider it, considered it, and Alex stays put.” Nathan starts walking again.

“Okay, fine,” Cal says, following him. “Whatever you think is best.”

I keep hold of my breath and still my beating heart as they pass by the barn. Then I let the tears flood into my eyes as my weary body slides down the wall to the floor. I pull my knees to my chest and wrap my cardigan around them.

Well, at least now I know I should always trust my instincts when it comes to people. Looks like I was right about Cal after all.