Waiting

EMMA

A week has passed since Diablo’s brawl with Mason. I’ve spent every day of it training with Alex, Levi, and Kenny, gearing up for the inevitable. I’m not about to lose.

Losing would mean marrying Mason, and that’s a fate I refuse to accept. Running away isn’t an option either.

It’s also been a week since I last spoke to Diablo.

Each night, I breeze past him, heading straight for a shower and then to bed. I’ve moved into the spare room. My anger at him is still simmering, but that’s not the main reason for my silence. I can’t afford any distractions.

My days start at three in the morning and end around eight or nine at night. Diablo has tried everything to get me to talk to him, from cooking my favorite meals to nearly breaking down the door of my temporary room.

But I’m just as stubborn as he is.

Mason hasn’t reached out to me yet. His silence is more unnerving than his constant messages. I know he’s planning something, something I’m not going to like.

Tomorrow is Saturday. I promised the guys a while back that I’d take them to a football game. I had to cancel the last tickets for obvious reasons, but I can’t let them down again.

They deserve a treat. They’ve been dealing with my crap for a while now, and I haven’t made this week easy for them. I got an extra ticket for Diablo, but I haven’t told him yet.

I’m not trying to punish him, but I’m scared that if I talk to him, my anger will bubble up, leading to a full-blown argument. I know I have to talk to him eventually. I’m not looking forward to it.

I decide to talk to him after my shower.

I step into the shower, letting the hot water cascade down my body. My muscles are more defined than before. The warm water soothes my aching body.

I just wish it could soothe my temper too. Sometimes I think back to the reserved woman I used to be and compare her to who I am now.

I’m not sure I like the person I’ve become, but circumstances have a way of molding us, changing us in ways we never anticipated.

Before I can dwell on my thoughts, I step out of the shower and quickly dry off. I pull on black shorts and a white thin-strap shirt that shows a bit too much cleavage—but who cares? It’s comfortable.

I head to the kitchen, but Diablo isn’t there. I grab a bottle of water from the fridge and settle on the couch in the dark, gazing at the city lights.

The peace is short-lived. My phone starts vibrating next to me. Mason’s name flashes across the screen.

Shit. Here we go.

“Hello, Mason, how are you?” I try to sound casual and calm, grateful he can’t hear my racing heart over the phone.

“My lovely Emma. Darling, it’s so nice to hear your voice. We have some business to discuss. It seems your boyfriend forgot the rules of our kind and you, my dear, will have to pay the price.”

“When, Mason?”

“A week from tomorrow. I’ll send you the location.”

“It’s settled. I’ll be there.”

“Before you hang up, Emma, I just want to say how much I’m looking forward to having you in my bed permanently as my wife.”

“I dream of you and me together, your legs wrapped around my waist while I thrust in and out of you, making you mine.”

“Mason, I’d rather die than have you inside of me. Go fuck one of your whores and leave me alone,” I say as calmly as I can, although I’m boiling inside.

“Oh, I do, Emma, every night. But when I’m with them, I only think of you.”

“Mason, you’re a sick man with an unhealthy obsession with me.”

“No, darling. I just know what I want—and I want you. I promise you one way or another I’m going to get you. You will be mine eventually.

“I will have what every man wants—you. And do you know why we all want you? It’s because you’re tenacious and an asset to any Mafia boss.”

“I know Diablo paved the way, but as soon as we all met you, we knew you’d be unstoppable. The fact that you’re so beautiful is just a bonus.”

The line goes silent, signaling the end of the call.

The date is set. I need a drink. I walk over to the bar cart and pour a generous amount of whiskey into a glass, mulling over Mason’s words before he hung up.

Yes, Diablo started this business, but he never expected me to exceed all his expectations or those of the other Mafia bosses.

“May I join you, or do you still want to be alone?” Diablo whispers from behind me. I down the whiskey before pouring another two glasses. Handing him one, I sit down on the couch.

“Was that who I think it was on the phone?”

“Yes, Diablo. The date is set.”

“When?”

“Next Saturday. By the way, we’re going to watch the Patriots tomorrow.”

“How can you be so nonchalant about this—even going to a football game tomorrow? Yell at me, hit me—just please stop being so distant.

“I hate that I’m so close to you but yet so far. Please, baby love, I need you back.”

“Excuse me? You need? ~You~ need? Are you fucking kidding me? If it wasn’t for you we wouldn’t be in this mess in the first fucking place. And you’re going on about your ~needs~?

“What about what I need? Did you think about that before you fought Mason? No, you didn’t. You let your ego and jealousy get in the fucking way again.

“You of all people should have known the consequences of your actions but, you still decided to act on impulse. I love you, Diablo, but right now I really fucking hate what you did.

“I love you, but I also hate you, if that makes any sense. I struggle to be around you and not lose my temper. You’ve put everything I’ve worked for at risk.

“I worked so hard for us. We’ve been through so much to get where we are. And you threw it all away in a second when you lost control.”

“Emma, how can you love and hate simultaneously?” Diablo asked.

“The love, Diablo, it’s always there. But the hate? That’s because of what you’ve done to me, over and over. The things I’ve had to forgive you for, they’ve made a small part of me resent you. Especially the whole Mason situation.

“But the hate, it’ll fade after next Saturday. The love, though, that’s here to stay. It’s possible to feel both at the same time.”

“Tomorrow, be ready to leave by three in the afternoon for the game. I’m not waiting around for you. Now, if you don’t mind, I need to get some sleep.”

“Emma?” Diablo’s voice stops me in my tracks, halfway to my room. I can’t bring myself to turn around.

“What is it, Diablo?”

“I love you. You’re my everything. I’m yours, and you’re mine.”

I don’t respond. Instead, I continue to my room, shutting the door behind me and locking it. I slide down to the floor, tears streaming down my face.

I cry for everything Diablo and I have been through. I cry because it seems like something or someone is always there to ruin our happiness.

I cry for what I’ve become. I cry because I’ve turned into a controlling bitch. But most of all, I cry because I know, deep down, I don’t hate Diablo.

I love him with all my heart, but it feels like we never get to enjoy our happiness for long.