Chapter 28
If you Don’t Love Me, I Will Die
Ania was crying.
She clung to me in my arms.
âDonât leave my side,â she cried, holding onto me.
Her gasping sobs were so unfamiliar that all I could do was stare blankly at Aniaâs trembling forehead.
âAniaâ¦.â
I was sure she would leave me.
Ania Bronte didnât love Edward Radner.
She was a woman who didnât understand what love was.
Yet here she was, asking me not to leave her, begging me not to hate her.
Was this also to win my heart?
To turn Edward Radnerâs heart towards her?
But if these trembling shoulders and shaky voice were just an act, what in the world could I believe in?
Thatâs why.
Despite vowing to leave,
Despite resolving to end our doomed relationship beautifully somedayâ¦
âPleaseâ¦.â
I tried to raise her head gently, but Ania kept her head bowed deeply.
Her disheveled golden hair draped over her face like a curtain, and the air heated by her ragged breaths gently escaped.
âAnia. Look at me.â
âI donât want to.â
âI want to talk.â
âNo! I donât want to hear it! I know youâre going to ask for a divorce.â
Yeah.@@novelbin@@
Thatâs what I was going to say.
Until you cried and begged.
I thought I knew what you wanted.
As someone who couldnât properly protect you, I thought you had had enough.
So I still donât know why you want me so badly.
âShould I ask?â
Ania Bronte⦠Can I believe your words?
If you say itâs because you love me,
Can I believe it without a doubt?
I donât know, but if you donât ask me to leave, I wonât.
Even if this relationship ends in disaster.
Even if this love may eventually kill me.
âI wonât leave.â
The wind was blowing fiercely.
I covered Aniaâs cooling body with my coat.
âI wonât leave.â
Guiding her chilled body, I gently pushed Aniaâs back.
Our footsteps climbing the hill were heading to the same place.
***
The harvest festival ended without any major incidents.
As it was impossible to immediately take Ania, who was shivering from the cold, back to our manor, we decided to stay at the Bronte estate for one more day and return the next.
Valentine Bronte seemed concerned about his daughter and didnât want to leave Aniaâs side for a long time.
I thought he might stay with her all night, but fortunately, one of the servants mentioned that he needed to start early the following day, so he returned to his room.
After Valentine Bronte left, I checked on Aniaâs condition in her room.
When I opened the door, the white moonlight illuminated the room.
It was a remarkably spacious room.
If the servants hadnât informed me beforehand that it was her room, I might have mistaken it for the hall.
I could see a pure white bed by the window.
Lace curtains adorned the top of the bed, and the neatly arranged bedding exuded a cozy scent unique to freshly laundered sheets.
I slowly approached the bed and gently sat beside Ania, who was lying with her eyes closed.
I touched her forehead; thankfully, she didnât have a fever.
I had been worried about her being outside in the cold weather for too long, so it was fortunate.
After briefly brushing her sweat-drenched hair, I lifted my head and looked around the room, feeling a strange sensation.
It was because this room, which I was entering for the first time, emitted a familiar atmosphere that was strangely comforting.
âUghâ¦â
Suddenly, my head began to throb with pain.
It felt just like when I climbed the hill.
Several scenes flashed through my mind once again.
A girl lies on a bed, and a boy sits by the window.
They seemed to be chatting happily.
In autumn, when the leaves turn red.
The boy and the girl⦠were probably Edward and Ania.
Gradually, my consciousness returned to the present, where snow fell outside the window.
Scenes from the past overlapped with the view outside.
Why am I seeing these scenes?
Are they memories lingering in Edwardâs mind?
No matter how hard I tried to think, I couldnât find a satisfactory answer.
So, I just sat beside Ania and gently brushed her hair.
***
âGood⦠morning.â
âDid you sleep⦠well?â
It had been a week since we returned to the mansion.
âShall we⦠have breakfast?â
âYesâ¦â¦â
The piled-up snow had melted away, and the chilly winter winds had been replaced by the warmth of early spring.
It wasnât just the weather that had changed.
âThis is delicious.â
âItâs tasty.â
Our relationship has also strangely changed.
Especially Aniaâs attitude⦠How should I put it?
Itâs distinctly different from before.
Itâs as if sheâs avoiding me.
Before, she approached me naturally, but now she canât even look me in the eye properly.
When I try to speak, she gets startled and canât string a proper sentence together.
Somehow, this has been going on for a week.
The only sound in the quiet hall was the noise of utensils colliding, and it felt like I would drown in the silence.
I should say something, but I donât have anything to say.
Itâs a strange feeling.
Before it became this awkward, what did we talk about during meals?
ââ¦â¦â
Looking back, Ania initiated most of the conversations.
âHowâs the sword training going?â or maybe, âDo you want to go for a walk together?â and suchâ¦
Maybe that was Aniaâs way of considering my feelings. Since I was exuding a stern atmosphere, she mightâve been trying to break the ice.
âMy Lady.â
When I called Ania with my eyes closed, there was a clattering sound.
A fork had fallen from Aniaâs hand and clanged on the floor.
âIâll prepare another one.â
âUh⦠okay.â
Looking somewhat flustered, Ania took out a handkerchief, wiped her mouth, nodded, and said, âYes, My Lord.â
âMy Lady, is there something you like?â
As if not expecting my question, Aniaâs hand, wiping her mouth, suddenly stopped.
Then she smiled brightly.
âOf course.â
âUm⦠do you have any favorite items or hobbies?â
âHobbiesâ¦â
After contemplating for a while, Ania softly laughed.
âI like gardening.â
Speaking of gardening, I know a nice place.
âWell then, how about visiting the arboretum in Sudo tomorrow?â
âAre you asking me out on a date?â
âItâs not like thatâ¦â
âThen?â
âItâs because we got married without knowing what each other likes.â
âHeheâ¦â
A blush appeared on Aniaâs cheeks as she sat on the opposite side and walked over to sit beside me, looking up at me.
âThank you.â
âFor whatâ¦â
âFor being curious about what I like.â
Ania suddenly picked up a fork and brought food to my mouth.
Since there was no need to feel embarrassed for no reason, I casually accepted it.
âHmmâ¦â
âWhat is it?â
âI like gardening⦠but not as much as I like you, My Lord.â
âThatâs a really nice thing to say.â
ââ¦Itâs true.â
âThatâs why I appreciate it.â
Ania furrowed her brows and puffed her cheeks, then burst into laughter.
Seeing her like that, I couldnât help but laugh, too.
âYou must be talented at alchemy with how you turned nothing into gold, Edward.â
Suddenly, we heard someoneâs voice. Startled, we turned our heads.
âYour Highness?â
âEldrigan?â
The voice we heard clearly belonged to the Crown Prince, but he wasnât there.
Instead, a servant was holding something.
âA phone?â
It was a device resembling an old-fashioned gramophone in the servantâs hand.
Eldrigan exclaimed with surprise in his voice.
âOh! Edward, have you already heard about this device? You truly are a man well-versed in worldly affairs.â
I wasnât really well-versed in worldly affairs, but I could see how it might appear that way.
After all, phones were just starting to be invented and were beginning to be known to some intellectuals and businessmen.
âI heard about it by chance.â
âAh, I see. I was hoping to surprise you with this as a gift. What a pity.â
Eldrigan let out a disappointed laugh.
âBut anyway⦠thatâs not the important matter. Edward, I have something important to tell you.â
âTo me?â
âYes, to you. I heard you arrested a woman named Yuren, who was transferred to the capital prison this time. Sheâs a wanted criminal who has been evading us for some time, so it must have been quite challenging for you.â
âIt was nothing.â
âYou may think so, but I donât. Come to the capital tomorrow if you can. And if possible, bring Ania along. Iâll treat you both lavishly.â
Eldrigan said this and then hung up the phone jovially.
I looked at Ania with a somewhat awkward smile.
âWhat should we do?â
Ania smiled back without any sign of confusion.
âLetâs go. As long as Iâm with you, it doesnât matter where we go, My Lord.â