Chapter 23: The Weight of a Secret

Harper couldn't shake the guilt. It clung to her like a second skin, an unbearable itch she couldn't scratch away. The memory of that fleeting kiss, soft and impulsive, haunted her at every turn. Every time she looked at Blyaine, her stomach twisted with shame.

She knew it was wrong. Kissing someone in their sleep-her boss, no less-was a breach of trust, even if it had been unintentional at the moment. Harper had convinced herself it was harmless, that Blyaine wouldn't know, but the knowledge burned inside her. She couldn't unfeel the softness of Blyaine's lips, couldn't unsee the serene way she'd slept beside her.

It was too much.

Harper began pulling away, little by little. She kept her interactions with Blyaine professional, limiting conversations to work or school. At the office, she avoided lingering in Blyaine's presence, finding excuses to stay busy with tasks that didn't require her boss's involvement. Even during their drives to and from her classes, Harper kept the conversations light and surface-level, never straying into the comfortable, personal territory they'd once shared.

It didn't take long for Blyaine to notice.

At first, she didn't say anything, observing Harper's growing distance with quiet curiosity. But as the days turned into a week, her confusion shifted to concern. Blyaine missed the easy banter, the stolen moments of laughter, the way Harper's presence had brightened her otherwise rigid world.

One evening, as Harper was leaving the office, Blyaine finally spoke up.

"Harper," she called, her voice soft but firm.

Harper froze in the doorway, her hand on the knob. "Yes?"

Blyaine stood from her desk, taking a hesitant step toward her. "Have I done something to upset you?"

Harper's heart sank, guilt tightening its grip on her chest. She turned slowly, forcing a small, strained smile. "No, of course not. Why would you think that?"

"Because you've been avoiding me," Blyaine said bluntly, her dark eyes searching for Harper's face. "You barely talk to me anymore. You're here, but it feels like you're not."

"I've just been busy," Harper lied, her voice faltering.

Blyaine frowned, crossing her arms. "Busy, huh? Is that all it is?"

Harper's throat tightened. She wanted to spill everything-to confess, to apologize-but the fear of ruining everything held her back. She looked down, unable to meet Blyaine's gaze. "Yeah. That's all it is."

Blyaine sighed, running a hand through her hair. "If something's wrong, you can tell me, you know. I don't want you to feel like you have to deal with everything on your own."

Harper's chest ached at the kindness in her tone. She didn't deserve it, not after what she'd done. "I appreciate that," she murmured, still not looking up. "But I'm fine. Really."

Blyaine didn't look convinced, but she didn't push. "Alright," she said quietly. "But if you ever change your mind..."

Harper nodded quickly. "Thanks. I'll see you tomorrow."

As she walked out, the weight of Blyaine's gaze followed her, and Harper felt the familiar sting of tears pricking at her eyes.

---

Blyaine sat alone in her office long after Harper had left, her mind racing. Something wasn't adding up. Harper wasn't just busy-there was something else, something deeper, that was pulling her away. Blyaine hated the sadness she felt at the distance, the strange, hollow ache in her chest every time Harper turned away from her.

She leaned back in her chair, staring out the window at the city lights. Harper had become so much more than an intern to her, more than just a protégé or a colleague. Blyaine cared about her-deeply. And the thought of losing whatever they had, even if she couldn't fully define it, left her feeling unsteady.

---

Later that night, Harper lay on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. Her apartment felt colder than usual, lonelier. The guilt gnawed at her, a constant reminder of the line she'd crossed.

"You're such an idiot," she whispered to herself, tears slipping down her cheeks.

She wanted to fix things, to go back to the way it was before. But how could she, when the truth loomed over her like a dark cloud? Harper pulled the blanket over her head, wishing she could disappear.

******

Harper was halfway through folding her laundry when there was a sudden, insistent knock at the door. The sound startled her, making her drop the shirt in her hands. She glanced at the clock-it was nearly 9 p.m. No one ever came by, let alone at this hour.

Her stomach tightened as she moved to the door, her mind racing through possibilities. She peeked through the peephole and froze. Blyaine was standing there, her coat unbuttoned and her hair slightly mussed, looking far more disheveled than Harper had ever seen her.

Harper hesitated before slowly unlocking the door and opening it just enough to see her face-to-face. "Blyaine? What are you doing here?"

Blyaine stepped inside without waiting for an invitation, her eyes searching for Harper's face. "I need to talk to you," she said, her tone sharp but not unkind. "I couldn't just leave this alone anymore."

Harper blinked, caught off guard by her presence and her urgency. "What do you mean? What's wrong?"

Blyaine turned to face her fully, her expression a mix of frustration and concern. "You. This. Whatever's going on with you. You've been pulling away from me, and I can't stand it anymore."

Harper's chest tightened, guilt rushing to the surface. "I told you, I've been busy-"

"Don't," Blyaine interrupted, her voice firm but not harsh. "Don't lie to me, Harper. I know something's bothering you, and I want to know what it is."

Harper took a step back, her hands trembling slightly. "It's nothing, really. You don't have to worry about me."

"I do worry about you," Blyaine shot back, her eyes softening despite her frustration. "I care about you, Harper. More than I probably should. And seeing you like this-so distant, so closed off-it's driving me crazy."

Harper's breath hitched at the admission, her heart pounding. She turned away, unable to face Blyaine's piercing gaze. "It's just... complicated," she whispered.

"Then explain it to me," Blyaine urged, stepping closer. "I'm here, Harper. Whatever it is, you can tell me."

Harper closed her eyes, the weight of her guilt pressing down on her. She felt Blyaine's presence behind her, warm and steady, and it made her chest ache. "You're not going to like it," she murmured.

"Try me," Blyaine said softly, her voice closer now.

Harper turned around slowly, her eyes glassy with unshed tears. "I did something... something I shouldn't have," she said, her voice barely audible.

Blyaine frowned, confusion flickering across her face. "What are you talking about?"

Harper hesitated, her hands twisting together nervously. "That night... when you stayed over to help with the furniture. After we went to bed..." She looked down, unable to meet Blyaine's eyes. "I kissed you. While you were asleep."

The confession hung in the air, heavy and raw. Harper's heart pounded as she waited for Blyaine's reaction, her shame burning through her.

Blyaine's breath hitched, and she stared at Harper in stunned silence. "You... kissed me?"

Harper nodded, her voice trembling. "I didn't mean to. It just... happened. And I've felt so guilty ever since. That's why I've been avoiding you. I didn't know how to face you after that."

Blyaine's expression softened, the tension in her shoulders easing. She stepped closer, her gaze searching for Harper's face. "Harper... why didn't you just tell me?"

Harper looked up at her, tears streaming down her cheeks. "Because I didn't want to ruin everything. You've done so much for me, and I couldn't stand the thought of you being angry or disappointed in me."

Blyaine's lips pressed into a thin line, her eyes glistening with unspoken emotion. She reached out, gently placing a hand on Harper's arm. "I'm not angry," she said softly. "And I could never be disappointed in you."

Harper blinked up at her, surprised. "You're... not?"

Blyaine shook her head, a faint, almost bittersweet smile tugging at her lips. "I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought about... whatever this is between us. I just didn't know how you felt, or if I was imagining it."

Harper's breath caught, her heart racing. "You've thought about it?"

Blyaine nodded, her hand still resting on Harper's arm. "I care about you, Harper. Probably more than I should. But I didn't want to push you or cross any lines. I was waiting for you to take the lead."

Harper's tears spilled over, her emotions a swirling mess of relief, guilt, and something she couldn't quite name. "I'm so sorry," she whispered.

Blyaine stepped closer, wrapping her arms around Harper in a warm, comforting embrace. "You don't have to be sorry," she murmured. "We'll figure this out. Together."

Harper clung to her, the weight of her guilt slowly lifting. For the first time in days, she felt like she could breathe again.

.............

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