Steeling Her: Chapter 7

Why the fuck didn’t I kiss her?

Why did Haley and Danielle have to come back at that moment? Talk about perfect timing. I’m so annoyed at myself for not doing it. Even when I was leaving, I debated the entire time whether to plant my lips on hers or not. She looked so perfect, standing there in front of me.

I hear the crickets in the grass. Walking home alone in the dark, I can’t stop thinking about that moment. She didn’t pull away from me. That’s a good sign, right?

I groan out into the darkness at how stupid I was to miss an opportunity like that. I was close, so close. I should’ve just kissed her. I run my hands down my face pulling at my skin.

“Ughhh! Nick, you idiot!” I moan to myself. My phone keeps buzzing from people asking me where I am; mainly Maya. I dodged all of her calls and now she’s taking the hint. Instead of stopping, the texts stream in.

Maya: Nick? Babe, where are you? You said you were coming?

Maya: TJ told me you left? Where are you?

Maya: NICK! Answer me!

Maya: Where the hell are you? Just tell me and I can meet you?

Maya: I swear to god Nick if you don’t answer me I will go to the house!

Maya: Your an asshole!

And now I see TJ’s texts.

TJ: Yo! Where did you go? Maya is here at the house about to smash the window of your car dude!

TJ: okay now she’s threatening to smash my window! Nick where the hell are you and take this crazy bitch away from me!

Oh shit. I quickly text him.

Me: I’ll be there shortly, try get rid of her!

TJ: Dude! Were you with a girl? She’s throwing a real bitch fit right now. Like, she’s putting white chicks to shame!!

I chuckle at the last message as I make way up the driveway of the house. Maya and TJ were standing outside. I could hear her yelling at him even from down the street. Typical Maya, everything has to be dramatic with her. She’s always been such a drama queen.

“I know he’s in there, TJ! I’m not stupid!” she yelled right up in his face. He smirked back at her with his hands out, trying to calm her down.

“I don’t know about that, Maya, the jury’s still out in that one.” She starts to hit him when he jokes about her intelligence and I run over to grab her away from him, gripping her wrists to stop her hitting him any further; she can throw a punch alright. Her head whips around her shoulder to look up at me, her mood changing for a second, then back to anger.

“Where the fuck were you!” She wiggles out of my grasp and I let her. Truth be told, ever since Carter reached across to hold my hand earlier, all I’ve wanted to feel was Carter’s hand. Maya waits for my answer as I scan her in the tightest green dress I’ve ever seen. Why does she dress like that all of the time? It’s like she craves my attention.

“I needed some air.” I shrug, looking over at TJ, who is now leaning back against our front door. His arms are folded with a smirk on his face. He’s enjoying it too. I know he is. He quirks an eyebrow at me, signalling me to carry on.

“So you left? It’s been hours! Where the hell did you even go?” She closes the gap between us but I step back to keep the distance between us. Her perfume is overpowering.

“That doesn’t matter. I just wanted some alone time. Can I not have some time to myself without you hounding me? Jesus, Maya! Chill, will you? I wasn’t down for the party, alright? I can have some off nights, you know?” I snap back at her. The fact that she raised her voice at me set my insides on fire. I’m not alright with her screaming at me. Especially at this time of night or morning. Her eyes shift back to TJ, who I look over to too.

He’s now imitating the motion of eating popcorn, relishing in this fight like always. He’s eats it up when there’s drama but when it’s about him, he runs for the hills.

“I was just worried . . . Nick, babe—”

“Don’t call me that!” I yell at her, making her step away from me. She should just go home. She annoys me how much she’s trying claim me. It will never happen. I don’t see her like that. I never have and I never will.

“You scared me, Nick. I thought you . . . I don’t know what I thought. I was just annoyed that I didn’t see you. I miss you—I miss us, Nick. Please give me a chance.” I step back when she steps forward, and I see the fire ignite in her eyes. “Why won’t you give us a shot?” she grits out, her eyes hardening.

“Maya, look, I just don’t want a girlfriend. It’s not for me. You of all people should know this, how important football and this scholarship is to me.” I try to reason with her. It’s the best excuse I can give. I can’t think of anything else to say to her, but her eyes are burning through my skull at this point.

This girl is on some sort of mission to make us a couple, to which I will never agree to. Relationships aren’t my thing. I’ve never had a girlfriend. I don’t like to stick to the one girl if I have options thrown at me from every angle. Who would want to give that up? Not me anyway.

“You really are a dickhead, Nick!” She storms off into the darkness and I watch her retreating figure. She kicks my car with force and determination behind it, setting the alarm off in the process. I sigh and look back at TJ, who is silently chuckling at me. I walk around to see the damage; she made a pretty deep dent on the passenger door. She clearly used her heel. I use my set of keys to switch the alarm off before we get into trouble with neighbors.

“Ohh-huhuhu! She kicked it real good, Jackson!” TJ admires the stamp she made in the sheet metal. I turn around, stand up, and punch him hard in his arm.

“You could’ve helped me, TJ. Instead, you stood there eating your imaginary popcorn with your imaginary friends. Idiot!” I sigh at the dent. It’s small but I want it fixed. My car is my one and only baby. This night went from bad to good and now back to bad. A rollercoaster is the only way to describe it.

“Where’s the fun in helping you. I was thoroughly entertained by you two!” I hate when this side of TJ is out. He can be such a dick sometimes. It’s more prominent when he’s wasted. “I was actually going to ask where you were, but I already know . . . How was Carter?” Hearing the smug tone, I turn to glare at him and run at him while he runs away, laughing down the street.

“Dude! Chill! Nick!” He continues to laugh and I join in. Smiling at my best friend as I chase after him. I can’t contain my grin. He’s faster than I am; he’s a running back for a reason, I just don’t give up.

“Nick! Come on, man!” he said over his shoulder as he continues to run. I finally catch up with him because we’re losing our energy. Grabbing his shoulders, I put him in a headlock while he laughs uncontrollably, tapping my arms for me to release him. “She must’ve been good if you’re not saying anythi—” I tighten my arm around his neck and he laughs once more. “Alright, alright! I’m kidding man! I’m kidding!” I release him and he rubs the shaft of his neck. He smiles over at me and I return it.

“Why did you go over?” he asks as we start to walk back to the house. We’re both walking in the middle of the street, not caring if there is a car coming. There’s nobody around.

“I went over to apologize to her.”

“For calling her ugly?”

“TJ! I didn’t call her ugly. She’s not ugly, she got my words all wrong.” I turn to him with a knowing look.

“You’re right, she’s hot! OW!” I punch him once more in the arm. He doesn’t get to call her that, even though I agree.

“Shut up TJ!” I roll my eyes while he nudges my shoulder with his own.

She looked so pretty tonight. Even with an oversized hoodie and yoga pants, with her glasses covering half of her face. The way she smiled and nodded her head, hanging on to every world I said. How she bit on the end of the pen when she was thinking about something. And her voice—her soft angelic voice that I could listen to all day.

I get smacked on the back of the head to snap me out of my thoughts. I glare at TJ again and crease my brows in annoyance at him. “What the fuck was that for?” I ask, raising my hand to rub the spot where the hit connected.

“You weren’t listening to me. I’m needy, Nick!” He bats his eyelashes at me dramatically, pretending to be a girl. “As I was saying, was she pissed? Or am I good to go over tomorrow and apologize too?” I shake my head at him, indicating he’s in the clear.

“Nah, she wasn’t pissed. She accepted my apology instantly. There was no drama about it. It was simple. She’s easy to talk to . . .” I shrug toward the end, thinking about her shyness toward me tonight. After those few hours, she started to come out of her shell a tiny bit, and I couldn’t help but admire her. When she spoke, I listened. I could listen to her forever.

“Uh-huh!” He smiles over at me once more. We make our way into the house. Shutting the door behind us, we make our way to my room. He sits on the chair at my study desk and twists himself around.

“Did Haley get herself into any trouble while I wasn’t there?” I ask him, stripping off my shirt and he does the same. I throw it in my laundry basket beside my door and sit on my bed.

“Nah, she was good. Kinda?”

“Kinda? What do you mean kinda?” I raise an eyebrow at him, asking him to explain further.

“Well, she was real snappy with Maya but I expected nothing less from her to be honest.” He shrugs, spinning himself around until he’s dizzy. I’m not carrying him into bed.

“TJ, stop doing that; you’ll get dizzy when you’re already wasted, so that’ll make you extra annoying.” I laugh, leaning on my elbows and looking over at him.

“Awww, I love you too, bro! . . . Alright, I’m done, tired, and wasted. I’m out! Bye, man! See you tomorrow morning!” I nod and say goodbye, and he leaves me alone in my room, stumbling over to his own. Finally, alone with my thoughts.

I slip into the sheets after I discarded my pants on the floor and let them gather around my waist. I put my hands under my head as I lay there and look at the ceiling. Then I remember I have her number and a photo with her. I grab my phone and click on the photo I took with her. She’s staring right at the camera with a beaming smile from laughing so hard. I feel a smile creep onto my face just from the memory. It feels like she’s staring right at me.

“Try not to have a wet dream about me . . . or Carter!” TJ yells through the walls at me. His room is across the way from mine while Ryan’s is next door.

“Fuck off, TJ!” Is the last thing I say before laying back down and drifting off to sleep, thinking about her before I do and listening to TJ laugh across the hallway.

***

Feeling a pillow pull me out of my dream, I’m immediately greeted by my two roommates grinning down at me. I blink to focus my vision. I rub my eyes to wipe the sleep away.

“Come on! Get dressed! We’re going out for food, and TJ is bringing us. We’re meeting him at the house.” Haley jumps on me with excitement written all over her face. I smile at her and Danielle lying in my bed with me. I throw the covers back and take a quick shower, leaving my hair wet and changing into shorts and a long sleeve top. I see they’re still lying on my bed, glued to their phones.

“Ready?” I ask them. They hop onto the ground and we all leave out the door. As we’re walking, they fill me in on what happened last night; about TJ and Haley flirting like crazy and that Haley was snapping at Maya for asking where Nick was the entire night.

I smile as I remember what happened last night when he came to the door. He was the last person I expected to be at the door. Once we reach the guys’ house, I can see it’s kept quite nicely even for a guy’s house. The lawn had been cut, the white paint was still intact on the sides of the house with ivy lacing up the sides, and the amount of cars owned by the guys surrounded the place.

Haley rings the doorbell twice and we hear movement inside the house. But we’re still waiting for someone to answer. Haley rings it again and we see a body making its way toward us through the frozen panes. The door swings open and we all see TJ standing there in his boxers, with nothing else on. All of our mouths hang open, staring at his abs. Freezing at the sight of him at the door there is nothing but silence between the four of us. Nothing. We’re barely breathing at this point.

Wow. Go Haley! I mentally high-five her and we hear a laugh.

“Eyes up here, ladies.” He points to his face and we all follow, blushing at him. He steps to the side to allow us in. “Just going to get dressed, then we can head out?” He winks at Haley, who grins. I see her cheeks flame up. We all watch him leave and another door opens opposite the one TJ is about to walk in to.

“Nice butt,” Danielle whispers to us.

Nick—in all his naked glory. Well, he’s in his boxers. A very defined six pack and that V line to go along with it is visible. He’s sporting bed hair, and his boxers couldn’t be any tighter, emphasizing his little friend down low. I feel myself blush at the thought that I was even looking there. Now I see why the girls on campus are obsessed with him.

He’s so sexy. Good God, help me!

He has broad shoulders and incredible muscles that emphasize how much gym work he does; even his legs are toned. His body is in such good shape and in proportion.

Once he closes the door, he sees us. Well, only me. I bite on my lip. I look away instantly after being caught checking him out. I glance back at him, and I can see his eyes roaming over me. Why is he looking at me? Making eye contact with each other, we both look away. I see TJ smirking at both of us. I turn on my heel to stand beside Danielle, who is propped up against the wall, eyeing both boys up.

“You want to come with me and the girls for food? I need the soakage.” TJ slaps his skin, making me look up again. I can see both boys displaying their ripped bodies. I see him nod and roll his eyes at his best friend leaning back against his door. Once they leave for showers, Haley spins around on her heel to face both of us.

“Okay, so, I see TJ like that all of the time but my reaction never changes. He looked so hot, oh my God!” she whines, rubbing her temples.

“Both of them looked so hot!” Danielle groans loudly.

“Eww! Danielle, that’s my brother! Don’t ruin the moment.” Haley bangs her head against the wall twice while I laugh, knowing how she feels. I get that a lot from girls about my brothers.

“Speaking of brothers! Carter! You never told me you’re a fucking Steel! Your brothers are like the hottest NFL players at the moment!” Haley’s head whips around and I cover her mouth. She stares at me, dumbfounded as to why I did that.

“Please Haley, not here,” I tell her as I look around, and she simply nods in reply.

“Later?” she asks me while I nod and glare at Danielle, who shoots her hands up in defense.

“Wasn’t me. She saw your family photos in your room when we woke you up this morning. She figured it out herself. She actually knew who your family were . . .” It looks like Danielle is telling the truth.

“I knew I recognized your mom from somewhere . . . Of course, I know who her family are! They’re the biggest influence in the NF—” TJ struts out, fully clothed, interrupting Haley.

“Ready?” We all nod, and I send Haley a pleading look not to bring it up. She nods, wrapping an arm around me. She whispers, “We can talk later.” Watching Nick make his way over to us behind TJ, he saw Haley saying something and sends us a quizzical look. I ignore it while Haley hugs her brother as a greeting.

We all slide into the car, the three of us in the back and the boys up front. I listen to the chatter of the others while I stay silent in the back. I’m not much of a talker anyway. I’m silently panicking about Haley finding out about me. I hope she doesn’t tell anyone. I don’t need people to try be friends with me because of my name. I don’t want to lose either of these girls as friends.

I look beside me when I hear Haley laugh. I then avert my eyes and glance at the rearview mirror. I double take when I see Nick already looking at me. He sends me a small smile to which I return. I look back out the window as we pass by a gas station and numerous quaint houses. A family car drives by us, and I get a small wave from a little boy looking out the window. I wave back to him, laughing with excitement in his face that I paid some attention to him.

“Ugh! He’s so cute!” Haley’s waves at him too.

I agree. This kid is adorable. As the car drives on, I lean my head against the window, trying to figure out where we’re going. I still don’t know my way around here yet. I’ve never driven here. I get my car in a few days. It’s being transported from New York at the moment.

I feel the car come to a stop, bringing my attention back to the present. I slip out of the car and TJ takes hold of my arm.

“You guys grab us a seat. I just want to talk to Carter real quick.” He nods ahead at the doors for them to carry on. They do as they’re told and they all look back toward us for a second before opening the doors.

“Um, I owe you an apology, Carter—”

“It’s fine, TJ. Honestly, I overreacted and I shouldn’t have.” He takes hold of my shoulder, shaking it a bit to stop me from talking.

“Carter, you had every right to react like that. I asked if you were pregnant . . . in public . . . in a hallway crammed full of people. I know I have no filter but I really didn’t mean it. I just started to worry about why you were nauseous. Being in college, that’s all you hear from girls. ‘I forgot to take my pill, my period’s late, I feel sick . . .’ et cetera.” I start to laugh at his girly voice he’s trying to pull off. I see him smile down at me, and I smile back.

“TJ, honestly, it’s fine. I get where you’re coming from. But I’m not that type of girl . . . according to Nick.” I poke fun at myself about the whole thing, seeing his grin form widely on his face.

“Yeah, well, I suppose idiots stay together, don’t they. But I am sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. Can you pretty please with a cherry on top forgive me?” He clasps his hands like a child, batting his long eyelashes at me. I nod and laugh while I hold on to my sides.

“I forgive you, TJ. I never held a grudge against you, anyway,” I say through my laughter.

“Good! So, can I get a hug to seal the deal? You can’t back out of it then! Also, my hugs are the best!” I quirk an eyebrow at him, trying to figure out if he’s serious or not. Sure enough, both his arms wrap around me, pulling me closer to his body until we’re pressed together.

After a few moments, we pull away and begin to walk towards the double doors and into the diner. All three of them are staring at us with shocked expressions. I sit in the seat next to Haley and opposite to Nick while TJ sits on the other side of me.

Looking up, I see Nick and his creased brows. They soften as soon as I make eye contact with him. Then he darts his eyes to his best friend, who is oblivious to his stare.

“Y’all ready to order?” An older woman comes up beside me, resting her hand on the back of my chair casually like she’s done this all before. Seeing people nod in silence, I feel like everyone’s on edge right now. But why?

We all place our orders and Danielle is the first to speak up, cutting the awkward silence.

“What were you two taking about?” she asks, casually sipping on her orange juice. I wait for TJ to answer but he’s looking at me instead.

“He apologized for the other day. All is forgiven. I’m over it.” I sit back on my chair. Why is everyone making a big deal out of it? Watching Haley think about what I said, she sighs in relief. But Nick is the only one still on edge from it.

We start talking to each other at the table; except for Nick, he’s just sitting there watching all of us closely. We hear a throat being cleared and we look up to see a tall skinny brunette standing over Nick, smiling down at him. She’s so pretty, I think to myself. Her bright pink top is a little too low and her shorts are a little too short. Stop judging her, Carter, she could be a really nice girl.

I get a nudge from Haley to look away and stop staring, so I do.

“Hi there! I’m Amy, I just wanted to come over and introduce myself. I see you around campus a lot and I come to your games.” His eyes reach hers when I subtly turn back to face them.

“Nick.” He points to himself. But he knows she knows who he is.

“I know.” She laughs a little before looking around our table. “I was wondering if you were free this Friday?”

He shakes his head. “I’m not free for Friday, sorry . . .” He’s sweet to her and I feel my stomach turn as I’m watching this. She looks to be more his type. Skinny, luscious long brown hair, perfect face, and clothes that hug her figure in all the right places. I look over to Danielle, who is glued to the entire situation.

“Okay . . . well, here! Take my number, call me anytime.” She bends over to scribble down her number on his napkin, her breasts spilling out of her top as she bends down. As she’s writes it down, she looks over at him and sends him a smile with those inviting eyes. He starts to rub his temple and stares at the napkin in front of him.

She finally leaves us after countless minutes of flirting with Nick. The entire time, I felt my lungs being restricted with air. I excuse myself to go to the restroom after I’ve eaten my breakfast. I will take the rest home as I didn’t eat much. I slap my face with water and dab it dry. Once I’m ready to leave, I pull the door back and walk into a tall guy. He turns around to face me. It’s Nick.

“Sorry! I didn’t see you there.” I touch his arm, making him stare at it. I quickly retrieve it, feeling like I shouldn’t have touched him.

“It’s fine,” he replies with a shrug. I go to walk around him but he steps the same side. I step to the other and he follows me. I stay planted and so does he. Is this a game? I see him staring down at me with a creased brow.

“Is everything okay?” I ask, scared of what he’ll say.

“Not really, no,” he says in a low tone.

“Why, what’s wrong?” I ask him, worried that something has happened. His brows, and also his face, relax into a small smile. He was messing with me.

“I didn’t get a hug.” I roll my eyes at him making me worry that something was seriously wrong or I did something to annoy him. “So, do I get one?” I laugh shaking my head at him. “No? Why not? TJ got one.” he moans at me.

“I mean, yes, you can have a hug if you want? I didn’t know it was bothering you.” I laugh at him and he steps over to me with open arms. I allow him to wrap me up in a hug and I feel his muscles protect me; the smell of his cologne lightly kisses my nose and feel the softness of the material on my cheek. I wrap my arm around his waist hugging him back. He pulls me tighter to his body, to my surprise, and I feel myself pulling back before I overthink this. Stepping away from him, I immediately miss his touch.

“Happy?” I shyly ask him. He nods his head rapidly with a huge smile on his face.

“Very. I know TJ told you he gives the best hugs but that’s not true. I do.” He walks back out with me to everyone else. I laugh at him and slide into my seat next to TJ.

“What took you guys so long?” Haley groaned, wanting to go and lay down in her bed. She’s badly hungover and the food isn’t sitting well in her stomach.

“I wanted my hug. If TJ got one, I want one.” He smirked at his sister who looks heavenward.

“Whatever, can we go now? I want to crawl back into my safe zone! Also, I think I should get shotgun, because I might puke!” We all stand up and saunter over to the car. I get thrown in the middle between Nick and Danielle, who is staring out of the window. I rub my eyes and yawn while covering my mouth.

“Tired?” Nick asks me. I nod and just stare back at him. His shoulder brushes against mine at every bump, turn, and stop. But it’s his leg that is burning my skin. His entire leg is touching mine, and he moves it closer so there’s more pressure on it. I don’t move. I don’t want to. “You can sleep on my shoulder if you want?” Seeing his eyes pierce through me, I feel a small pulse in my body shocking me a little.

“Oh no, it’s fine. I—”

“I honestly don’t mind. Haley and Ellie does it all the time.” Ellie? Who’s Ellie? I feel something in my stomach that I’m not liking. “My other sister, she’s five.” My eyes light up at the fact they have a little sister. I love kids. I turn into such a big kid when I’m with them.

“You have another sister?”

“Yeah? Did Haley not tell you?” I shake my head at him. Maybe she did mention it but I wasn’t paying attention? Or maybe she never mentioned it? “Here, look I’ll show you.” He whips out his phone and scrolls through some pictures. I see nothing but naked girls posing for him on his phone and immediately look away. “Shit! Sorry, I keep meaning to delete them.” I hear him mumble curse words under his breath as I look straight ahead.

I take his hand to stop him and I say, “Maybe you can show me another time.” When he looks at me, I turn away instantly with a fake smile. The ride back was silent, as I predicted, and equally just as awkward. I just sat there thinking about how many naked girls’ pictures he had on his phone. He’s that type of guy. He’s the type that gets sent naked picture after naked picture. But worst of all, he keeps them. He actually keeps them.

Later in the hour, TJ pulls up to our dorm building. Haley successfully didn’t puke in the car. Nick steps out of the car to let me out before Danielle, so I instinctively hop out his side. Before I did, I say bye to TJ. I step outside and mumble “Bye” to him before I walk around the back of the car to get inside. I follow behind Haley and Danielle as they trudge up the steps of the building. I didn’t look back. I didn’t want to.

Instead, I see their reflection looking at us in the window of the doors. Nick’s in particular. He is staring at my back, rubbing his hands down his face as he talks to TJ. He is very animated, by the looks of it. Once they drive off, I walk inside the building and hop in the elevators with the two girls. We see where the annoying drilling is coming from. It happens from nine in the morning everyday. One of the rooms is getting renovated. It looks like the offices for the accommodation staff.

Either way, it’s making me sleep deprived.

Once we make it back to our room, we all lay on my bed and mindlessly watch the TV, allowing some to give in to sleep. We’re watching a very old episode of “The Hills” on MTV. We talk about my family as I fill Haley in on it, pleading for her to not tell anyone. She’s skeptical at first about not telling her brother. I get that, but I will tell him. Sometime. Maybe not. Maybe I can get away with not telling him?

Either way, the odds are not in my favor. It’s not something I like telling people—football fans and players in particular.

This is something that is best kept quiet.