chapter 13

CONQUERED BY MY FIRST CRUSH.Chapter 12 :Though I changed my place, met new friends, stayed in the new atmosphere, my heart is still excruciating  for him. The new atmosphere is not helping to come out of my turmoil but throwing me more into the pit of agony.I realized that each and every guy in the college was either dating girls or into relationships. The handsome and charming guys were always surrounded by girls flirting with them to get their attention. Whenever I notice them, the only person I think of is Harsha. The only question that kept pestering me was “Is Harsha also getting the same attention from girls? Being a handsome and charming guy, he might have already started dating someone pretty and magnificent girl”.The only thought of him dating another girl or being in a relationship with someone other than me makes my stomach flips with anguish. A feeling of jealousy took over my heart whenever I got that idea and tried to date with the guys who approached me but failed miserably to flirt with them as my heart always reminds me of Harsha.At the time of my engineering, many handsome guys approached me confessing their love and requested for dating. But I don't have any interest in any of them and I turned them down. This made me get names like proudish, egoistic and arrogant lady. After a few approaches the guys realized that I am not their type and kept their distance from me.Throughout engineering I was single without any boy friends, dates or any other entertainment as my heart never forgot the thought of Harsha. Though I have not seen him for years, I still remember the looks he gave me at the time of his departure. My body still remembers his kiss which always keeps lingering on my lips reminding him as if it happened yesterday.Though everyone kept their distance from me when it comes to love or dating, only one person didn’t back out from the trials. His name is Karan and he was in my class and section. Though I turned him down, he still keeps speaking to me and has become a good friend to me and Sarika. He asked me to be friends with him if I am not interested in dating. I didn’t think it was wrong to be friends with him as he is a very good, caring and helpful person.Though I can see his love towards me, my heart never reciprocated the same with him. My heart never flutters around him in the same way I feel for Harsha. I advised him not to stick to me and look out for someone whom he deserves the best. But he neither looks at any other girl nor allows anyone near him who tries to flirt with him.We completed the engineering with a good CGPA and got selected in campus interviews. To our delightment, Karan, Sarika and I got selected in the same company.Karan felt very delighted to get placement in the same company along with me. He tried to persuade me that fate is trying to get us together.I felt very guilty for keeping him in the dark without exposing my love towards Harsha. I don’t want to picture myself crazy in front of him by telling that I am waiting for the person whom I was not sure whether he remembers me or not.I don’t want him to raise his hopes on me and  explain everything about my love to Harsha. I told him how I built the walls around my heart not allowing anyone to invade my heart as Harsha planted himself deeply in my heart.