Chapter 17: Long Distance (Part 3)

Ryan

Two days later, Ryan's roommates still hadn't spoken to him, and it was starting to get uncomfortable. Jordan was hogging the bathroom in the mornings, either to make it impossible for Ryan to get ready or because she was avoiding him. On Monday Ryan had washed his face in the kitchen sink and gone to school without brushing his teeth (luckily, Marina had gum). On Tuesday, Ryan tried knocking on the bathroom door. "Hey, do you mind hurrying up? I have to brush my teeth." Jordan ignored him, and Ryan waited until the last possible second to leave before class but she never came out of the bathroom. It seemed very unlike Jordan to choose being late to class simply to be passive aggressive.

It was hard to talk to Jacky about the roommates during their calls, because he was aware that they might be listening in. Over text Jacky suggested taking his shower in the evening and keeping his toothbrush in his bedroom so he could brush in the kitchen sink if needed. But the apartment's shower schedule was set, and when he tried to shower on Tuesday night after everyone else, there was no hot water left.

On Wednesday night, Ryan decided to get out of the tense atmosphere of the apartment and go for a walk while he called Jacky.

"Where are you?" Jacky asked after answering. "Hiding in the closet?"

"I'm outside." It was darker than he'd anticipated. Half the streetlights seemed to be out. "Needed to get away."

"What was the bathroom situation this morning? Is Jordan still being a dick?"

"She's being something all right."

"Wow. You are way too nice. I probably would have flipped my shit already."

On the screen, Jacky appeared to be sitting up in bed. His bedside light cut sharp shadows across his face.

"Do you ever fight with Billy?"

"Uh, all the time. You do recall that he's my ex-boyfriend?"

"You seemed to get along okay while you were here."

Jacky laughed. "It's gotten better with him. Ever since he and Liliana decided that fixing my love life was their new goal."

"Where is he now? It seems like he's never there." It was after nine o'clock.

"Who knows. He has a lot of sex, apparently." Jacky shifted his weight. "Seriously, though, what are you going to do about Jordan? How have the other roommates been?"

"Well, Harper is nowhere to be found. I think she might be living at Charlie's place."

"And the other one? Sam?"

"Sam's been... not that bad. She hasn't really talked to me other than saying hey when I come in and the other roommates aren't there." Ryan sighed. "I don't know what to do."

"Have you tried talking to them?"

"No. Unless you count me knocking on the bathroom door yesterday, which Jordan completely ignored."

"Maybe that's what needs to happen. A roommate meeting."

"Maybe."

"Or you could put snakes in their beds?"

Ryan cracked a smile at that. "Harper seems like a person who likes snakes."

"She does," Jacky agreed. His image slid sideways then settled, and Ryan knew he was lying down. "I wish I could see you. I bet you look really hot right now."

"I probably look like I haven't had a decent shower in three days."

"Bet you smell really hot, too."

"Full-on body odor."

"Oh, yeah, baby." After a pause, Jacky said, "I wish I could come down there again and we could shower together."

Ryan glanced around as if someone might have heard Jacky's voice through his earbuds. "Didn't we try that once and it was miserable?"

"I think you were miserable. I was under the hot water the whole time."

"What about when you got soap in your eye?"

"Okay, fine, we were miserable. But someday you could Facetime me from the shower so I could watch?"

"Like a voyeur?"

"Exactly. Only consensual."

"Consent is key."

Ryan turned down a corner and headed up a hill back towards home. It was that little bit too cold to be outside for long without gloves.

A slamming door sounded on Jacky's end of the call, followed by a faint "Ooh, having your evening sex chat with Ry-Ry?"

Jacky sat up, snapping, "Could you maybe knock?"

"Why would I knock before coming into my own room? You're supposed to put a sock on the door if you're getting up to something in here." The camera jostled and Billy's face popped into frame. "Hi Ryan! Or is this Ryan? Why are you in the dark? Is this a kinky sex thing?"

Jacky glared at him. "Why are you like this?"

"You mean, like my usual delightful self? It's a gift."

Jacky wrestled the phone away. "Okay, well I guess we can talk again tomorrow night."

"Sure. I'll try to be in better lighting tomorrow."

"Good."

After they said their good-byes and signed off, Ryan looked around at the dark streets and felt lonelier than ever.

Jacky

It was strange, suddenly having friends. If Jacky went to lunch and sat down by himself, he might find himself joined by Liliana or Billy, who might then call over Deja or Kayla or Brandon. Once, when Jacky walked up to the cafeteria hall, Liliana waved him over to the big knot of girls she was with, and then Brandon and Braedyn had joined them, and they'd taken over one of the big tables. It was almost like when Jacky started sitting with Ryan at lunch in high school – he felt strangely popular, but in a way that was less like he was the freak at the table and more like they all just liked hanging out together.

Today, Jacky had grabbed some tomato soup and grilled cheese and turned to search for an empty table when he saw Billy sitting with Braedyn near the windows. A little stab of jealousy pierced his chest. What did Braedyn see in Billy that he hadn't seen in Jacky? Even though he told himself that it didn't matter, that he had a hot boyfriend and didn't need Braedyn's approval, he still wondered if it was because of his arm.

"Ooh, let's go bother them," Liliana murmured at his side, giving him a sideways grin. She took the lead and he couldn't help but follow, thankful not to have to make the decision himself. Liliana plopped herself down in the seat next to Billy. "Hey, nerds."

"Giiirl," Billy said, "I met my dream lover today."

Jacky wasn't sure why he was so relieved that Billy had apparently been talking to Braedyn about some other guy.

"And when I say he's a fox, I mean he's a fox."

Jacky froze.

"As in, his name is Fox. Also, I'm in love."

"Are you talking about Fox Greythorn?" Jacky asked.

Billy's eyes widened. "Do you know him?" He leaned forward on his elbows. "Tea, please. I must know everything."

Wishing he could just enjoy his lunch, Jacky sighed. "I mean, his father's a professor. He's in my art history class. We went a date." He shrugged, deciding not to reveal that Fox wrote fanfiction, and sopped a corner of his grilled cheese in the steaming soup.

"Oh, yeah, I remember you talking to him, that night during the fire drill," Braedyn said slowly. "He hangs out in the laundry room a lot," he told Billy.

"Whaaat?" Billy sat back like this was important news. "No one thought to tell me that a complete hottie was just hanging out in the laundry room?"

"If you didn't get your clothes dry cleaned, you might know that," Jacky said.

"What does he do in the laundry room?" Billy asked, leaning forward again. "Is this where he gets all his action? Because he must get a lot of action."

Liliana tilted her head. "Where did you say you met him again?"

"I saw him smoking outside the English building. There's just something about a man who smokes."

Jacky snorted over his soup. "Is it the lung cancer?"

Billy rolled his eyes dramatically.

"Yeah, I think I've seen that guy in the laundry room," Braedyn added, about a year too late. "He was writing? Like, he had a laptop and was wearing a sweater with elbow patches."

"Oh, that guy!" Liliana laughed. "Once, he had a pipe in his mouth –"

"He was smoking weed?" Billy gasped, clutching imaginary pearls.

"No! Like Sherlock Holmes?"

Jacky grimaced. "So pretentious."

Waving his hands around, Billy reset the conversation. "Okay, there is a lot to unpack here, but first," he gestured to Jacky, "I need to hear about this date you went on."

Ryan

Ryan had always considered himself to be straightforward and not afraid of confrontation, and yet it took him several days to ask Sam about getting everyone together for a meeting.

Normally it might not have taken that long for all the roommates to be in one place at the same time. It soon became clear, however, that not only were Harper and Jordan avoiding him, his mouth became dry at the thought of talking to them.

In the end, he had to trick them by holing up in his room with the door closed and ordering Pete to hang out in the kitchen until they were all there. Then Pete texted him a thumbs up emoji, Ryan's signal to emerge. His hands were sweating as he stood and went into the kitchen.

"Hey—" Ryan suddenly choked. He'd been about to say guys, which could have been offensive. He cleared his throat; only Sam had looked up anyway. He decided to step more into the living room portion of the apartment. "Hey, can we talk?"

"I don't want to hear anything you have to say," Harper snapped, not looking at him. "After what you did to Charlie—"

"Hear him out, Harper," Sam said quietly.

Sam's interjection gave Ryan the time he needed to process and form a response. "Would you rather I led Charlie on? Look, I didn't want to hurt them. I also didn't expect Jacky to show up here."

Jordan and Sam exchanged a look. "You didn't know Jacky was coming?" Jordan asked.

"My phone was broken. He came because I hadn't responded to his texts."

"So you've been communicating with him," Harper snarled. "That's emotional cheating."

Ryan took a breath, trying to find a diplomatic phrasing. "Yes, it was. And I told Charlie I was sorry about that. I still wasn't even sure that Jacky wanted to get back together with me. We needed to have a talk... which happened when he showed up here. I know you're mad that I hurt your friend, and I wish I'd had more time to explain things to Charlie, but this all happened and I thought the best thing was to not keep hurting them."

Sam cautiously looked at Harper. "I mean, you wouldn't have wanted Ryan to stay with Charlie, knowing he's still hung up on his ex?"

"Charlie hasn't gone to classes all week," Harper said. Her eyes were shiny even though her face was fierce. "They've barely slept. Me and Riley have been taking turns sitting with them, trying to convince them to go to the counseling center. All because yet again, someone trampled all over their feelings."

Now Ryan felt even worse. He remembered that day he'd come home and Charlie had been there, sad because they'd had their heart broken. "I didn't know that."

"Dude, that's not your fault," Pete said from the kitchen. Ryan had forgotten he was there.

"Oh, sure, take sides with ya boy," Harper scoffed.

Back in the group home, Pete had never gotten involved in the usual drama between the other boys. He was the mellowest guy Ryan had ever known. The way Pete merely blinked at Harper's words brought back how often Pete had been on the receiving end of someone's misplaced anger, and how he'd never let it bother him.

Standing and stepping into the living room, Pete said, "Look, it sucks to get broken up with. But if Charlie's that depressed after dating someone for a couple of weeks, that isn't Ryan's fault. I know Ryan. I'm sure he let Charlie down as gently as he could, because he's not a giant bag of dicks."

Harper huffed, but didn't have a response.

Pete continued, "If you want Charlie to come over to help them out, maybe you could just let Ryan know not to be here? I'm sure you guys can work things out by communicating rather than being all passive aggressive and shit."

Jordan looked at Pete like this was the first time she'd ever seen him. "I think that's the most I've ever heard you say at once."

"Seriously," Sam agreed. "And are you sure you're not secretly going to college to be a therapist?"

Pete smiled lopsidedly and gave Ryan a knowing look. They'd both heard similar speeches from the staff at the group home, over and over again. Somehow, being the one embroiled in all the drama had caused Ryan to forget all of those group home meetings to discuss interpersonal issues.

"I could definitely make myself scarce if Charlie needed to come over here and didn't want to be around me," Ryan said. "I just don't really have anywhere to go overnight, except for my car."

As they discussed the logistics of working together, Ryan tried to express that he didn't mind talking to Charlie if that's what needed to happen, and slowly Harper thawed out a little. By the end of the conversation, she had expressed how worried she was about Charlie's mental health, and they all offered ideas of what to do if Charlie showed up to the apartment. Then they all started rooting around in the kitchen to make something for dinner even though it was technically Pete's night to cook, and together they made a meal and sat around talking, and Ryan's stomach finally unclenched from the knot it had wound itself in over the weekend.

He couldn't wait to call Jacky and tell him all about it.