Damon's POV

This was all my fucking fault. I waited until my wedding day to realize that it was the wrong fucking decision. I knew everyone would be pissed at me after today. My family would be frustrated after already asking me numerous times to rethink my decision. Dante would be angry with me for breaking Anya’s heart. And Anya—she would surely hate me for ending things with her on such an important day.

But Clarissa, she would be the only one that would be happy with my decision, and that was all I fucking cared about. I wanted her to be happy. I didn’t want to hurt her anymore. I would find another way to make things work between us. There had to be another solution to our situation. I was done pushing her away. I was done doing the opposite of what she wanted from me.

“Is the groom ready for his big day?” Atticus asks as he taps my shoulder.

My jaw clenches. I had to tell him the truth. I knew there was a big possibility that he would suspect my decision had something to do with Clarissa, but I didn’t care, not after the look on her face earlier.

I didn’t care if Atticus called me out on my actions. I didn’t care if Anya called me the worst names possible; I couldn’t marry her.

“I can’t marry her,” I tell him. “I can’t marry Anya.”

Atticus looks at me like I’ve just lost my mind. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Exactly what I said. I’m not marrying her,” I answer him.

“You were ready to marry her just a few minutes ago. You’re the one that put your suit on. No one fucking forced you to do this. All of the guests have arrived, and they’re expecting to see a wedding! Damon, we’ve always let you make your own decisions, but this is unacceptable. It’s not just about you anymore; when have you ever been this irresponsible? I feel like I barely know you anymore.”

I didn’t have time to explain to him. I had to find Anya. I had to tell her that this wedding couldn’t happen. She may already be in her wedding dress. I never wanted to hurt her. I knew Atticus did the same thing to her, but what I’m doing is much worse. I’m breaking her heart on her wedding day. I should have listened to everyone else around me. I should have given this wedding more thought. I rushed into it thinking that I was protecting Clarissa, and instead, I’d done the opposite.

But before that, I had to meet Clarissa. I had to tell her that this wedding was not going to happen. I had to see the relief on her face. I was ready to face whatever punishment she had for me after putting her through that torment to begin with. I was prepared for everything as long as it meant I didn’t lose her.

“Damon!” Atticus calls after me as I rush out of the room.

I race towards Clarissa’s room. I don’t even bother to knock as I barge into it. I take a look around. I’m shocked to find the room completely empty. The last place I saw her was at the bottom of the stairs with Autumn. I storm out of the room and down the stairs. I had to find Autumn.

Atticus was right behind me, and I knew that this wasn’t how I wanted him to see me. I’d just proclaimed that I wasn’t going to marry Anya, and minutes later, I was barging into Clarissa’s room and running down the stairs like a hysterical person.

I bounce into Griffin while searching the crowd.

“What’s wrong?” he asks when he sees the look on my face.

“I need to speak to Clarissa,” I answer him. “Where is she?”

He shrugs his shoulders. “I’ve been too busy to keep an eye on her.”

My jaw clenches at his response. Someone was always supposed to keep an eye on Clarissa. Whenever someone wasn’t paying attention to her, she always did something drastic, especially at a time like this.

A cold shiver ran down my spine as I remembered her threat yesterday. She threatened to leave for good. I thought that she was bluffing. I thought that it was a harmless threat. Now, I wasn’t so sure about that.

“I need to find her,” I say as panic begins to sink in.

Atticus catches up to me then, and he’s angrier than before.

He grabs my shoulder. “What the f*ck is going on? You can’t just walk out on your wedding day like this without giving a proper explanation!”

I run a hand down my face. “I can’t do it. I don’t love Anya the way that I thought I did. My feelings for her are not the same as before. I can’t marry her.”

I can’t tell him the entire truth. I can’t tell him I can’t marry her because she wasn’t the woman in my heart. I couldn’t tell him that Clarissa was the only woman I craved. The only woman I needed.

Atticus looks shocked by my words. Of course, he would be; just yesterday, I was sure I was doing the right thing. Just yesterday, everyone believed that I loved Anya. They thought I was marrying her because I wanted to. No one knew the real reason behind my actions.

“Anya just arrived,” he informs me. “I’m not a big fan of her, but I think she at least deserves the truth. You need to properly explain to her why this wedding will not be taking place. It’s the right thing to do. In the meantime, I will try to find Clarissa. There’s no telling what trouble she’s up to now.”

I knew he was right. I knew I had to speak to Anya, but I had this strange, unsettling feeling in my chest. I was desperate to see Clarissa. I hated the way I left things between us this morning. I had to fix it. I had to wipe her tears and make everything better for her, just like I’ve always done in the past.