chapter 9

I was crying in my heart, when Pushpendra got an urgent call from his office and he excused himself for sometime.As he stepped outside, I said to Sugandha,"Please forgive me Sugandha, it was my mistake that I had not listened to my heart. I had an affair with someone who was playing with my emotions. I thought that it was a harmless flirtation on my part and there was no need to get you involved in my matter. I was stupid that I ignored your pure love and ended up being trapped by someone's fake love!"Sugandha looked at her daughter who was enjoying herself in the kids zone. She said to me,"I don't want to dig up my past as I have buried my past along with my memories and feelings long time back.When you started seeing Khushbu behind my back, then I realised that you wanted to get separated from me that is why you were ready to have an extra-marital affair with someone who was more attractive in your eyes than your simple and plain wife.A husband feels that if his wife will have any problem due to his womanising behaviour then she could give him divorce or if she could accept such kind of behaviour and turn a blind eye or deaf ear towards her husband's infidelity then she will be tamed for life. Then let me tell you that anyone who feels that such kind of a behaviour is normal in a married relationship between a husband and wife is living in an illusion created by cheaters and philanderers.Seven year itch or harmless fling are just some words often used by people with sick mentality.In our culture, husband is the best friend of his wife who gives her encouragement to find her true passion and gift so that she could fulfill her dreams and realise her destiny.In our country, India which is also known as Bharatvarsha has witnessed in the past, many women who were equally learned like their husbands. They were not only taking care of their family's daily needs but were seeking knowledge through efforts and awareness of their inner powers of their inner selves.When you decided to marry me then, you didn't ask me for the permission to get married to me. I want to ask you today that whenever two people get married to each other, why does the opinion of a groom matters and not the bride? Why no one asks the bride before fixing the match if she really wants to get married at all leaving aside for a moment the respective groom in question.If the girl comes from poor family then the man who agrees to marry her feels that he had done some kind of a humongous favour by asking for her hand in marriage.After getting married, the groom feels that he has to prove how much powerful and virile he is on the first night itself otherwise he would be labelled as a weakling by his friends and family. Even before such kind of sudden outbursts of pent up emotions and suppressed hormones, the man conveniently forgets to seek his wife's permission before attacking her body and wounding and scarring her soul for years to come.My best friend, Sneha had a traumatic experience on her first night of married life due to her husband's reckless behaviour who was trying to prove how strong he was on his first meeting with his future wife. She told me that she felt as if a wild beast was let out from the cage as he started devouring her like a piece of flesh and blood. She said that he behaved in such a manner as if it it was the first and last time that he would ever get a chance to satisfy his carnal desire in his entire lifetime.Why doesn't anyone teaches patience, respect and values before giving them a license to exploit someone's mind, body and feelings in the name of love(animal).I ask you, did you seek my permission before being intimate with me?Once, you satiated your lust in the name of love, you easily moved on to your next prey!People often say that mostly in the cases of extra-marital affairs, the other women are bad but let me tell you today, that in my eyes akways the womaniser is bad, even if he is my own husband!Did you ask for my personal to cheat on me? I would have happily divorced you if you did so because if I am not in your heart and mind then what is the need of being present in your life like a lifeless furniture of your house?I don't want to see your face in my future lives and you better stay away from my daughter Mehek, who deserves a better father like Pushpendra to guide her in life!"Sugandha outpoured her suppressed feelings in front of me, I tried to wipe her tears but she pushed away my hand in anger.I was speechless and was lost in my thoughts when Tara Mam said to Sugandha,"Sugandha, you are a courageous woman and I respect your decision of not forgiving your ex-husband Palash.I just want you to hear his story before passing your final judgement. I don't want you to begin a new chapter in your life by carrying a heavy baggage of regrets and vengeance in your heart. If you will not forgive your past then it will keep popping up in your future in some form or the other.Whenever we are sad, we all react differently!Some people start fighting, while others start crying. Sometimes people make a mess of their lives while sometimes people earn a huge pile of money just to spite someone!It doesn't matter how rich, beautiful or popular you are if you are not peaceful, happy and sweet in your inner world.We all carry stories which we often tell ourselves, let me tell you my story!"