Kicked Out

*Warning*

Strong language

and

Verbal abuse

AMANDA'S POV

I get woken up by the sound of my phone ringing. I see that it's Ollie and I pick up.

"Hello?"

"Amanda! FINALLY you pick up. I've been calling you for awhile now. We came to pick you up!" Ollie says.

"Uh I uh..." I look over at Michelle who is still sleeping. I think it over not sure if I should leave. I want to stay with her and talk about our future together.

"Actually, I think I'm going to stay here a bit longer."

"Seriously? I mean, it's cool it was kind of shitty of us to not pick you up sooner, besides there's a restaurant near by that me and Liz like. If you need a ride let me know."

"Okay."

"Bye."

I put my phone away and lay back down pulling the cover up to my neck. I look over at Michelle, barely able to make her out thanks to the dim orange light coming through the window from the setting sun.

I trace lines with my fingers across her back. I relax by feeling her soft skin on my fingertips.

Michelle turns her head towards me, a couple of golden strands of hair lay across her face. The rest she had put up in a messy bun so that her hair wouldn't interfere with...stuff.

"Hey..." she mumbles.

"Hey."

Michelle's arm like a snake slowly wraps around my waist and pulls me closer to her.

"Do you need me to take you home?" she mumbles.

"I kind of want to stay with you a bit longer." I replied.

Michelle smiles as she pulls me even closer. My face resting on her chest.

"I'm glad you're back." I continued.

"I'm glad we're back together like this. I missed you."

Michelle says in her raspy morning voice.

"I felt so lonely without you." I whispered.

"So did I. We had a messy start."

"Yeah...again I'm sorry...for-"

"Amanda, stop. I already told you that you don't need to apologize."

"I just don't want to be apart from you again. I don't remember feeling as happy as when I'm with you."

"I feel the same."

"I just hope we can deal with my mother if she finds out...again."

Michelle falls silent as she seems to be staring off into the distance.

"Speaking of, how are things between you?" she then asks.

"We haven't talked about what happened and I'm afraid to bring it up."

"I see. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to call me. Okay?"

"Okay."

I snuggle closer to Michelle as we continue to talk.

...

I told Michelle to drop me off near my house so that my mother wouldn't catch us.

After a goodbye kiss, I made my way home. I enter to find my mother laying on the couch.

Two opened bottles of wine by the coffee table.

"Hey, did you just get back?" I asked.

She shakes her head.

"I slept here. Where were you?"

"With my friends as usual." I replied.

"You don't stay over at your friends that often."

"Well, it was graduation and we were really excited. We lost track of time and I crashed with Lisa."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Do you think I'm stupid, Amanda?"

"What?"

"I know she's back."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'll give you one last chance to quit acting stupid."

I keep quite knowing that when she's like this. Anything I say will make things worse.

"Do you have anything to say? No? Nothing?... Didn't she leave you for like a year? She didn't even text you back, don't you remember?"

Silence filled the room.

"I just don't understand."

"What?" I let out weakly.

"Why would she choose someone like you instead of me?"

"What? Am I not good enough for her?"

"Hahaha, of course not."

I was speechless, not sure what to say.

"What? are you serious? Oh my god you are, aren't you?" she continues "Come on be serious Amanda. I'm not sure if you are naive, blind or just really that stupid...maybe all three."

I felt my body heat up and opened my mouth as I began to feel myself run out of air. Tears slowly travelled down my cheek soon after.

"How can you be so cruel? I'm supposed to be your daughter. Don't you care about me?" I said through tears.

"I do, Amanda! I do care. That's why I'm telling you this. You need to listen to me. I'm looking out for you."

"By telling me I'm ugly!?"

"By telling you the truth!" she scoffs. "Do you seriously think you are pretty? I mean seriously, Amanda, look at yourself and compare you to Michelle...how can you not see that she's using you! For what? I don't know but there's no other reason I can think of for her to like you."

At this point, I was just wailing at the things she said. I take deep breaths trying to calm myself down.

She started to pour herself more wine.

"Y-yeah...w-well..." I struggled to get my words out.

I took a deep breath.

"Maybe you're just jealous she likes me and not you!"

She scoffs.

I get increasingly angrier. "Do you know how many times we've slept together? In fact, I just came back from her place where we spent all night fucking while she told me I was the only one for her!"

I shouted.

I breathe heavily as she puts the bottle back down onto the coffee table and walks around the couch facing me.

Her face was red. She looked at me like she wanted to kill me. Even though she had never hit me, I still felt a bit scared.

"Do you seriously believe that?" her calm demeanor made me nervous.

She shakes her head and continues "Stop being delusional! Come on look at you and look at Michelle... Compared to her, you are just a fat girl that she can use. How can you possibly believe she'd really love an ugly pig like you..."

"Mom..." I cried out through tears.

"I sometimes feel ashamed that you are my daughter."

I looked down. My vision is blurry due to my tears. The room was silent for a moment.

"Amanda, I'm just saying what you need to hear. Michelle has had many women chasing after her and the ugliest ones are still way prettier than you. I just want you to realize that."

I shook my head.

"You think you know everything. You think you know why everyone does things and if you don't, then they are crazy or don't know what they're doing. This...this is why people leave you.

Why Michelle left you, why I want to get away from you and...why my father left you."

My mother walks back to the coffee table and grabs the wine bottle. I flinch as it shatters on the wall behind me and she begins to scream "I TOLD YOU TO NEVER MENTION HIM! And you know what, maybe just maybe the reason he left was because he didn't want to have a fat cow and a f***** for a daughter!"

Her words cut deep and I was too stunned to speak.

"Fine, if you want to be with Michelle that much, then go to her. Go! get the fuck out of my house...!" She says, sitting back down on the couch.

I go to my room and I begin packing the things into any bags I can find.

I'm constantly wiping tears from my eyes.

I'm also not sure where I'm going to go. I can't stay at Lisa's anymore. I'm sure her parents, maybe even her, are tired of me staying over.

After getting all the bags ready, I headed to the front door.

As I pass my mother, who's still sitting on the couch, she looks my way and says "Don't think of coming back here when she inevitably leaves you."

"Goodbye mom."

"She travels a lot. You know, it won't be long until she forgets about you just like she forgot about me."

I leave the house and begin to wonder around. Not sure of what I'm going to do. I won't make it far with all the stuff I'm hauling.

As I made it about a block away from my house, my phone began to ring.

I look at the caller ID and saw that it was Michelle. I'm not sure if it's a good time to talk to her, so I let it go to voicemail. She calls again and I begin to panic a little bit. Maybe it's really important and she needs something.

"Hell-"

"Where are you!?"

"Uhh...w-what?"

"I'm heading over to pick you up, send me your location."

"Oh, OK." I sent her my location very confused as to what was happening.

"Got it! Stay there. I'm a couple of minutes away."

She hangs up and I look around, still confused.

As I was beginning to feel a bit weird sitting on the sidewalk I heard a car pull up next to me.

Michelle hops out of the car and quickly walks over to me.

Without saying a word, she takes me into her arms and I start feeling emotional again.

I cry into her chest as she rubs my back. She leans my head slightly back using her thumbs to clear away my tears.

"Let's go home." she says taking the bags that I was carrying. Michelle opens the passenger side door and helps me in before placing the bags in the trunk.

As Michelle drove home, I tried to calm myself. Michelle looks over at me and takes my hand in hers and whispers "It's okay. Don't worry, it's going to be alright."

I held her hand tighter and rested my head on her arm.

...

We arrived at Michelle's house and she took me into her bedroom. She lies next to me and asks "What happened?"

"M-my mom and I fought...she said the most hurtful things to me...I can't-"

"Hey, it's okay. Don't worry. You know that everything she said was lies. She was just trying to get to you."

"It hurt so bad!"

I couldn't hold it anymore. I started crying for the hundredth time today. Michelle hugs me and I fall asleep in her arms.