Forever After All: Chapter 15

I walk through Alexander’s bedroom, feeling restless. He helped me pack my belongings and dropped me off before going back to work, so I’ve got at least a few hours to myself. I’m nervous as I glance at my luggage in the corner. Sharing a room with Alexander… just thinking about tonight has my heart racing.

This entire space is amazing, and from now on, this’ll be home to me. It feels like a luxurious suite in a six-star hotel. He must’ve hired an interior designer to remodel everything. It’s been years since I’ve been surrounded with such sheer luxury.

I pause beside his bed, my heart sinking when I notice Alexander has a photo of Jennifer and him on his nightstand. I pick it up carefully and sit down on his bed, my hands trembling. It’s been over a year since they broke up, yet he still has a photo of the two of them. Is this what he looks at before he goes to bed, is she still the first thing he sees when he wakes up?

My heart constricts painfully as I put the photo back. He’s made it clear that he won’t ever love me, but I still remember the way he loved Jennifer. It was clear for everyone to see that she was his entire world. I’m not much of a dreamer; every single hope and dream I had came crashing down on me when I lost my entire family, each of them in a different way. But part of me… part of me hoped I’d someday have a family of my own. A husband that loves me, a home filled with laughter and happiness. I won’t have any of that now that I’ve sealed my own fate.

I can’t have romantic notions. I can’t have hope. Alexander has been clear from the very start, and I can’t delude myself into thinking he’ll love me one day. I can’t set myself up for heartache.

I glance back at the photo and bite down on my lip. I may be his wife now, but there’s no guarantee that he won’t come to regret marrying me. If my father and brother can turn their backs on me, then so can Alexander. I need to remember that.

I try my best to clear my mind as I walk into Alexander’s walk-in closet, pausing in surprise when I find a whole wall full of women’s clothes, shoes, and bags. For a second my heart drops, but then I notice that everything still has the tags on. My eyes flutter closed as relief courses through me.

Looks like the family stylist works quickly. I shouldn’t be surprised they’ve got my size. Alexander’s background check must’ve been quite comprehensive.

Everything in here is the kind of stuff I’d expect Alexander’s wife to wear. Semi-formal, classy, and crazy expensive. It’s the kind of stuff I used to wear, before I was forced to sell everything I own to pay my mother’s bills.

“Do you like it?” a soft voice behind me says. I turn around in surprise, finding Sofia leaning against the door frame, a small smile on her face.

“I do, this is amazing.”

“I got a call as soon as you registered your marriage. I get informed about a lot of things my sons do, though they don’t realize it.”

I chuckle, not surprised at all. Even when we were younger, she always knew what everyone was up to. She took having eyes in the back of her head to a whole new level.

“I guess congratulations are in order, but I do hope you know what you got yourself into, Elena. Alec… he’s not looking for love. I’m glad that the one he married is you, but at the same time I wanted more for you. This isn’t what your mother would want for you, either. Alec has been through a lot, and I’m not sure he’ll even be able to give you a chance. I hope he does, Elena. I really hope he does. If anyone can mend his heart, I think it’ll be you.”

I nod, my heart sinking. “I understand, Sofia. I’m ready to deal with the consequences of my choices.”

Sofia sighs and grabs my hand. “Call me Mom, sweetie. You’re my daughter-in-law now.”

I force a smile onto my face and nod at her.

“I’m selfishly glad that it’s you. You have no idea how much your mother and I wanted you two to end up together when you were little. If things were different, if we weren’t who we are, if the Kennedy name didn’t destroy every hint of love, then maybe you and Alec would’ve been perfect together.”

Her words surprise me. She’s always been a hopeless romantic, so when did she become so jaded? I haven’t seen Alexander’s father around, and I wonder if that might be the cause of it.

I look up at her with a heavy heart. “You two wanted Alexander and me to end up together?” I ask, disregarding her other words. “Not me and Lucian?”

She smiles. “Of course not. Lucian and you are incredibly incompatible, for numerous reasons.”

She looks at me as though she wants to say something, but doesn’t. “I’ll leave you to settle in,” she says, smiling at me. I nod and stare after her as she walks out, shutting the bedroom door softly.

I sigh as I walk into Alexander’s bathroom. His bedroom and bathroom are mostly open plan, and there is no door, just a whole lot of stone and glass. His huge tub is freestanding, and rather than in the bathroom, it’s in front of his windows like a statement piece. The view is astounding, and I can only imagine what it’ll look like as the sun sets.

I walk through his bathroom and play around with all the buttons. He’s got controls for everything. There’s a radio, a TV screen in his shower, and different types of lighting. I push one of the buttons, and a water curtain appears at the shower’s entrance, like a waterfall, obscuring the inside of the huge stone shower. I press the button a few times and smile. I shouldn’t be surprised that Alexander’s room is so tech-intensive.

I eye the tub in the corner longingly and check the time. Five pm. Probably enough time to take a bath and be down for dinner at six. Alexander said he had to work late, so I doubt he’ll be back soon.

I undress and let my clothes drop to the floor as the tub fills up. My lace bra and panties follow, and I’m suddenly reminded of the way Alexander touched me. It feels like a lifetime ago, but it was only yesterday.

I step into the tub and press one of the little buttons in it. A small amount of soap drops into the water. It smells like lavender, my favorite. Looks like Alexander has good taste. I press the button a few more times for good measure and then turn on the jets.

“Oh God,” I moan. The jets are hitting me from every angle, massaging my entire body. I didn’t even realize I was this tired until I laid down in here. Combined with the stunning view, this feels like such a luxury. I lean back and close my eyes, letting the jets massage me. I haven’t felt this relaxed in as long as I can remember. It’s been years since I’ve felt so at ease. Taking a long bath used to be one of my favorite things to do, but I haven’t been able to take one in years. Not since I moved out of my father’s house.

I move my hands over my breasts and down my stomach, enjoying the smooth feel of being underwater. I’ve never been a very sensual person. Sure, I’ve touched myself a few times, and after a few tries, I can usually make myself come. But sex has never appealed to me much. In part because I simply never had time to date, and casual sex isn’t my thing. I never had the chance to get close enough to someone to want them. The one time I had sex wasn’t very memorable at all.

Yesterday, though… that was the first time I wondered what I might be missing out on. I’ve never come as hard by myself as I did with Alexander.

I lightly brush over my clit with my fingers, teasing myself. I drag one finger over my skin, remembering the way Alexander touched me. The way he looked at me with eyes filled with desire, despite his anger. I move my fingers in the exact same way he had, replaying the scene in my head. I push one finger inside while I circle around my clit with the other, mimicking his movements. I’m breathing hard and moaning, losing control over my body and my desire quickly. In my mind, I’m touching Alexander’s body as he touches and kisses me. I know I’m seconds away, but I’m enjoying it so much, I don’t want it to end.

“Elena?”

I yank my fingers away and sit up in alarm, forgetting to cover my breasts, exposing them above the water. Alexander is standing in front of the tub, his crotch at eye level. I can clearly see the outline of his erection, and I freeze.