Chapter 760

“Now onto Grandpa’s side of the family, I guess. His is a little more complicated. Grandpa Laurence is still a prude though. So... both of his parents were... are? God I don’t really know where to start with Laurence’s side of the family. Ok. Um... hmm. So both of them are a lot like me I guess, though they’re both into women,” Sue saw Kat and Kamiko’s confused look, “ok fine, let me backtrack a tiny bit then.

“On Laurence side of the family I have two Great Grandma’s, one of them is Great Grandma Selina and other is Great Grandma Kylie, though both are shorter names than their full titles. Selina is a full shapeshifter, and gets working parts when she does. So she, was more than capable of impregnating someone to have a family with.

“Now that, that... whole thing makes sense. I should explain. The pair of them vaguely knew of each other for a long time, and I’ve actually met them both, though they aren’t still together... but they sort of are? Gah, my Great Grandfamily is a fucking mess. Guess it makes some sense why the Grandparents turned out the way they did,” Sue dragged her hands threw her hair, messing it up a bit as she came back to herself.

“So. They both knew of each other, and in fact actually went to school together. This isn’t a story of childhood sweethearts though. They HATED each other at school. That hate though meant they kept track of each other when they kept ending up on Contracts together, and because they’re both a lot like me, but for the other team, they were both willing to sleep with just about anything with tits. Pretty much the only exception was each other.

“Until they started doing those Contracts I just mentioned. They’d go out of their way to barely react to each other before apparently, one night, they had hot angry sex and they were best friends the next day. It just took them TWO FUCKING CENTURIES TO GET TO THAT POINT,” Kat reeled back, shocked by the venom in Sue’s voice. When Lily, in Memphis form of course, gave Sue the stink eye for her volume Sue wilted slightly.

“Sorry for the yelling. It’s just... I don’t understand how they kept up a grudge for that long. Still. It did make them friends. Eventually. They then spent the next few thousand years just living life, having lotsa apparently hot lesbian sex, something you might aspire to one day Kat.” Kat’s deadpan stare said otherwise but Sue ignored that, “it was when they were... I believe the number they gave me was ‘sometime after five thousand’ but that’s one of those ‘I don’t want to actually tell you how old I am’ type phrases that implies this took them five thousand years but probably took them ten or twenty.

“Anyway, eventually, very eventually, they were both looking into the idea of having kids. They wanted a family, just to see what it was like but they didn’t ever find ‘the one’ they were looking for. Well, after discussing it while drunk one night Selina pointed out she could certainly grow a fully functioning penis, and Kylie had a perfectly functioning womb for the kids. Why don’t they just have a family together?

.....

“Now,” Sue paused, making sure she still had everyone’s attention. Kamiko... she was watching, but the jelly was stealing at least part of her thoughts. Sue thought about waiting longer... but decided that was a lost cause. “Now you’d think that they’d plan things out at that point. Talk things through a bit more? Not my Great Grandparents.

“Instead they drunk a bunch of alcohol and then did all the drugs. I even asked them afterwards, ‘what drugs and why’ and Grandma Kylie said ‘All of them, and because it was necessary’ which... I can’t really comprehend. Surely Grandma Kylie knew she’d need to involve a dick at some point but nooo. Apparently a big fat dick ready for baby making is different to the collection of dildos I’m certain she must own.”

Lily had hidden her eyes with her front paws and let out a slightly pained whine. Sue rolled her eyes, but checked to see Kat’s reaction. Kat of course could tell Lily wasn’t all that phased, and gave a slight smile when she met Sue’s eyes letting the busty demon know she hadn’t pushed things to far.

“With that... they apparently went for a week or two? Remember ALL the drugs. They very much do not recommend. Bit of a blur and they didn’t recover for a few more weeks afterwards. So the exact spot where the sex ended and the recovery began is very blurred. When it was all said and done though, Kylie was pregnant with triplets.

“They had Dad later on because they wanted a larger family and three wasn’t enough... but apparently it took a lot of somewhat painful effort on my Great Grandmas’ parts. To quote them, ‘it was a lot of rather uncomfortable sex just for one more child’ and ‘they weren’t drunk enough to go through the full bender a second time’ so... that’s how things went with them both. Apparently, according to Laurence, they tried to make their home a welcoming place and Selina and Kylie both tried not to just... go out and sleep with a bunch of women, keeping up the ‘we’re a family’ shtick for about a hundred years after Laurence was born...

“But... it was very obvious, or so Laurence says, what type of Contracts they both took during that time. I think Laurence could never figure out why neither of his parents cared the other was taking weekly Contracts to go have sex with other people. The fact that Kylie and Selina weren’t sleeping together all that much because the house they bought didn’t have the insulation required for it, and weren’t planning to stay forever so never installed it meant they were finding their sexual gratification elsewhere...

“And that was FINE for both of them. Even now that they’ve sort of split up, they’re still best friends and the most recent time I met them both they were practically hanging off each other. I’m also pretty sure Grandma Kylie had her hand on Grandma Selina’s ass the whole time. So, it’s certainly not like they’re on bad terms. They just aren’t bothering to keep up the illusion that they were happily married. Though... I have a few suspicions about how long that’ll actually be true.

“Just based on the way they still look at each other pretty sure I’ll see them properly marry each other before my hundredth birthday. So, with that being explained from both sides of my Grandparent’s family, you can... maybe? Hopefully? See how they ended up prudes. I mean, I still don’t understand it, but perhaps you guys can comprehend the profoundly shitty parenting my Great Grandparents engaged in.

“Just kidding. They let their kids do basically whatever they wanted. They didn’t limit anything and I know Laurence at least disapproves of his older siblings. All girls by the way. Might be another reason they stopped at Laurance. No clue how to raise a boy properly. Whatever they case, he too became a massive prude. However, he didn’t need to move to a new Hub because the family was already in that new Hub. Wanted a quiet place to raise the kids apparently.

“That’s where Elizabeth and Laurence met. The way they both tell it, it was a long romantic epic of boy meets girl, they slowly grow closer and closer over time, bonding over their shitty family situations before eventually, after centuries of courting they confess their feelings and get married. Thing is, I don’t know how much of that to believe really.

“See, both Grandma E and Grandpa L went to work for Sloth. Not because they like that style of work, but because they wanted nothing to do with Lust, and their parents. They still insist they enjoy their jobs, but they always word it funny. So I’m pretty sure they hate it and use Contracts to blow off steam.

“Now that you know all the issues with my Grandparents, you can see what happened to my Mum. They were super controlling of her. Raised her as the ‘good girl’. Kept her away from as much ‘bad’ Succubus activities they could. Spoke poorly of sex and all that other stuff. Kept her away from her grandparents when she was young, and Mum was an only child. So broke under the pressure and started rebelling. Doing everything my Grandparents hate to get back at them for not letting her live her own life.

“Then they had to struggle with what to do about the whole thing. Which... is a bit of an epic saga in and off itself. If that’s something you want to hear? Or would you rather move on?” offered Sue.

“This is better than any romance novel I’ve read,” said Kamiko, “So I’d vote for keeping going,”

“Wait you read romance novels?” asked Sue.

“Yes?”

“With smut?”

“No...”