: Part 1 – Chapter 4

There’s something about seeing the world through different lenses.

Before, it was blurry. Now, there’s sense to it, a clarity I wasn’t able to feel before.

There’s something called happiness, and there’s something called joy.

For my whole life, I never actually understood what happiness meant and why people would crave to be happy. It felt like a high that would just eventually wear off.

That is, until Ronan became a constant in my life. He’s happiness incarnate.

He’s a high that will never wear off.

After we graduated, we spent the summer travelling. Just that, travelling, from one country to another and from one city to the next.

We were free souls discovering the world and people and cultures. He called me a nerd whenever I asked about museums, and I called him a gigolo whenever he wanted to go to the trendiest bar.

Ronan will be Ronan no matter what happens. Fun and parties are in his soul. Whenever anyone needs a party thrown, he’ll be at the front of the line planning his next ‘epic’ event. The last was Aiden and Elsa’s marriage. He was so extra in his speech, acting salty because he wasn’t the best man.

Since then, he’s been bribing Xander to be chosen as the best man, threatening to delete them all from his group chat.

He won’t.

What he doesn’t tell them is that the horsemen saved him from his head several times in the past. They weren’t there just for the parties, like most other people; they were there for him, and Ronan would never forget that.

To say we’re both over Eduard would be a lie. Sometimes, it feels as if he’s still the shadow looming over our lives, even after his death.

Ronan and I still have the nightmares, but they’re sparse and far between. We go to joint therapy now, and it’s the best therapy I’ve had in my life.

When it gets to be too much, I just say it. However, it usually doesn’t, because I know I have my family, and most of all, I have him.

Ronan.

The moment he strokes my hair off my face or kisses me, I usually climb his body and demand that he fucks me.

Of course, he obliges, and he makes it dreamier every time, rougher, harder. Ronan has never treated me as if I’m a delicate flower, and I love him the most for it. Even when he fucks me slow, it’s to make me feel him — feel us — not because he’s afraid of touching me.

Ronan and I are never afraid of touching each other. If anything, it’s what brings us closer and makes us calmer.

We started with a touch. The first time he did it in RES’s library, I kind of fell under his spell and he fell under mine.

Today, I have a surprise for him.

We came to his parents’ house for dinner. Charlotte is finally out of the danger zone. Those couple of months after Eduard’s death were complete hell.

Edric had to make his brother’s death seem like an accident, and Charlotte’s illness was taking its toll on him and Ronan. I held my fiancé’s hand through it all until the results came out and the doctor said the last surgery had been a success.

She had to do a lot of recovery therapy, and Edric didn’t leave her side through it all. Ronan didn’t either.

One of my favourite memories about that time was when Edric asked Ronan for forgiveness for not seeing Eduard’s actions, and Ronan said he was sorry he hadn’t seen his mum’s illness.

Edric and Ronan grew so close during Charlotte’s recovery journey. I think seeing them together by her side helped her mental state more than any doctor would tell them.

Ronan and I were supposed to leave after dinner, but he said he needed to grab something from his room.

He’s been taking a long time, so I might as well ask him now.

“Lars.” I grin when I see him coming out of Ronan’s room. “How do I look?”

I pull on my white T-shirt, on which is written ‘Belle’.

I’m also wearing a black tulle skirt, a leather jacket, and boots — comfy, as usual.

“That’s the second time you’ve asked me that question tonight, Miss Teal.”

“Stop being such a snob, and it’s only Teal,” I tease.

Lars and I have grown close over time. He wouldn’t admit it, but he always has a dark chocolate bar ready for me then he whines about how I keep stealing them.

“You look beautiful.” He lifts his chin. “And stop eating the chocolate no one offers you.”

I make a face as he strides down the hall then I go into the room.

Okay, this is it.

It’s not like it needs to be traditional or something — not that I care about that anyway.

“Hey, Ronan, when are we getting married…?”

I trail off when I find him in the middle of removing his trousers in front of a bed filled with baskets of dark chocolate.

“Fuck, belle, you weren’t supposed to come in yet.”

I grin. “Don’t stop on my account.”

His hands remain on his belt. “Lars said dark chocolate is the best bribe I could use with you.”

“Lars wasn’t wrong.”

“Wait.” His hand leaves his belt, and I nearly reach over to put it back.

Ronan is so beautiful, sometimes I stay up just to stare at him.

It’s not only his physical beauty, though; it’s also his soul that speaks to me and wrenches me out of my own soul.

He’s the calm after the storm.

He’s the light after the darkness.

He’s everything.

“Go back.” He narrows his eyes. “Did I hear something about marriage?”

“Yeah. I thought…you know…we’d make things official?” Otherwise I’ll start punching every girl who looks at him at uni.

He still attracts attention like a magnet. I thought that would be over after RES, but nope, his popularity knows no limits. I need to stake my claim before anyone tries to take him away.

It’s not that I’m threatened or anything, but I’m as greedy about Ronan as he is about me. That will probably never change.

People say we’re too young to get married, but it’s not about age for me. I’ve decided Ronan is the only human being I’ll spend the rest of my life with. It’s a cemented fact. So why delay it?

“Hey.” He appears offended. “I was planning a night out to ask you. This is not fair.”

“You wanted to ask me?”

“I wanted to marry you before that fucker Aiden married Elsa, but you always say all the grandiose stuff is stupid, so I figured I’d wait.”

My heart skips a beat as I stand on my tiptoes, wrap my arms around his neck, and seal a kiss to his cheek. “It isn’t stupid when you’re involved, Ronan.”

His grin widens. “One-nil, Xander.”

I laugh. “So does this mean you’ll marry me?”

“Of course I’m marrying you, and you didn’t ask first — I did.”

“We’ll agree to disagree, your lordship,” I tease. “What did you have in mind with the chocolate?”

“A few things.” His eyes shine with mischief.

“Like what?”

“Like this.” His lips meet mine, and then we’re falling on the bed.

If this is my life going forward, I’m so ready for it.