: Part 4 – Chapter 19

So here’s the thing. I told you before that being me is easy, and it is, in a way. You just have to skip the whole being inside your head shit.

Which I’ve mastered.

Like, no kidding. I’m the king of all that.

Do you know what my trick is? I choose to be inside my lovely wife’s head instead. Which isn’t hard. She lets me in willingly. And I don’t just mean inside her pussy and arse and mouth. Those are an everyday pleasure — thank fuck for that.

Teal also lets me in on all her beautiful thoughts that no one but me has access to. Well, maybe me and Knox, but her twin brother doesn’t count since he decided to relocate to the States for his new life there, and we barely see him in holidays.

So I’m the only one she’s got — thank fuck for that, too.

Lars has started to become friends with her, but Lars doesn’t count either because I can kick him out every day. And if you were wondering, yup, he does have a black book. I caught him writing in it the other day like a teenager with angst issues.

Anyway, where were we? Right. Me and Teal. The only two who matter, and if anyone tells you otherwise, then you shouldn’t listen to them.

When we first got married a few years ago, I thought Teal would be the type of person who would need to hide at times. Not that I was going to let her, but that was her modus operandi when we were engaged. Colour me surprised when, instead of disappearing, she sought me out.

Sometimes, when it gets to be too much and she needs a place to hide, my embrace is that place. When she needs a screaming outlet, I take her to the mountains and let her go at it, because that’s how she deals with the past.

Over the years, those times have eventually disappeared. Ever since we graduated from university, she’s been even more focused about our future. She’s been learning from Ethan. And Agnus — the fucker whom I’m not killing, because murder is unfortunately still frowned upon.

I’ve also been trying to learn about the family affairs from Dad, and let’s just say that Lord Edric Astor is strict as fuck when it comes to business. I normally have Lars stand with me as some sort of an ally, but when dealing with my dad, that bastard is usually Team Earl Astor. I contemplated bitching to Mum about it, but that would label me as a mama’s boy, and I’m totally not — a mama’s boy, I mean. I’m married, thank you very much.

Despite Dad’s strict rules that come somewhere from medieval times, I know that he wants what’s best for me. Over the past few years since the one who shall not be named died, Dad apologised to me for not seeing what happened sooner. He even hugged me. No fucking kidding. My father, Earl Edric Astor, the successor of the Astor family name, almost lost his diploma from his ancestors when he showed some emotion and actually hugged his only son.

It was just that once, but it felt like both of us needed that closure. Since then, we’ve been building back our father-son relationship that I thought was long dead.

Turns out, no. It’s long from dead, and Dad’s new purpose in life seems to be torturing me. Sorry, I mean, teaching me business the right, strict way.

“Does that mean I’m not supposed to invite everyone to the company like it’s a party?” I asked him once, just to be a dick.

He stared me down with that condescending gaze of his. “Are you joking or should I search for another heir?”

“Joking, joking. Jeez.” I pointed at myself. “How could you even think about exchanging this eternal sunshine with someone else?”

His lips twitched in a smile, which meant he thought I was funny. “Hear that, Lars? He called himself eternal sunshine.”

“Yes, your lordship.” Lars judged me with his snobby expression. “I will witness in your favour.”

“Lars! You fucking traitor.”

“You got yourself into this, young lord. Don’t blame it on me.”

Let’s just say that those sessions happen more often than I like to admit. And yeah, I had my revenge by spiking Lars’s original tea with cheap stuff from the store. He found out about it, though, and I’m pretty sure his black book came in handy during his ranting sessions.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what he writes about me, because everyone knows I’m the heart of this house. Whenever Teal and I come for dinner, like today, everyone at the table waits for my jokes — especially my mum and my wife. They’re my number one supporters, thank you very much.

Teal retreated to my old room in my parents’ house to rest while I had a small meeting with Dad in his home office.

I’m about ready to take her home and fuck her until tomorrow. She spent the entire day with the other girls, Elsa, Kim, Silver and Astrid, while I had to listen to Lars bitching at me to ‘pay attention’. Then we had dinner here.

It’s been exactly eighteen hours since I last touched her.

The platonic skin-to-skin doesn’t count. And whenever I slipped my hand under the dinner table to tease her, she pushed it away.

Teal might appear like a rebel, but she respects my parents too much. I’m trying to make touching her under the table a normal occurrence. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Once I’m finally done with the boring meeting at Dad’s office, I practically jog down the hall towards my old room.

I find Teal sleeping on her side, her petite frame barely taking up any space on the bed. I slowly close the door, trying not to make a sound, and kick my shoes away.

I slip in behind her, the mattress dipping with my weight. Then I sneak one hand under her arm until I grab her breast. She moans softly as she snuggles back into me.

“Wake up, belle, I miss you.”

“Mmm.”

“I will speak French to you, mon petit coeur adoré.”

She opens one of her eyes, peeking up at me. “You will?”

I grin, knowing exactly which buttons to push. “I will only speak French if that’s your kink.”

“Nah, that’s not my kink.” She cups my cheek. “You are.”

“Holy fuck. Repeat that.”

“You’re my kink, Ronan. You always have been.”

“And I always will be.” I flip her so that she’s underneath me. “Now, let me satisfy your kink.”

“Wait.”

“Nope. I can’t wait until we’re home. I’m hungry.”

“You just ate.”

“I didn’t eat you.”

She laughs, but she still places a hand on my chest, stopping me. “I have something to tell you.”

“After dinner. My main course, I mean, not whatever we had in the dining room.”

She chuckles, her happiness filling the space. I can’t get enough of the sound of her laughter, of how easily I can bring that out of her. It’s like I appear and she automatically smiles. I say anything and she looks at me as if I’m the wisest person alive. I’m not. But the fact that she looks at me that way, even after so many years, makes me the luckiest fucker on this planet.

I grab her by the waist. “Remove your hand, ma belle. Don’t leave me starving.”

“Ronan…”

“Oui, ma puce?”

“I think I’m pregnant.”

I stop with my hand on her jeans’ buttons. “You’re…what?”

“I took two tests and they said positive, but it could be false, like Silver back in school, you know? I’ll have to take another one and go to the doctor, but…yeah, I think I’m pregnant.”

“Whoa.”

“Is that a good whoa or a bad one?” She’s watching me so intently, unblinking, as if afraid she’ll miss something if she does.

“A fucking bewildered one. You’re carrying a baby.”

“Your baby.”

“My baby,” I repeat, a weird sense of pride hitting me out of nowhere. I mean, we knew we would have children one day, but since Teal admitted to the therapist that she’s afraid of the idea of becoming a mother, I thought we could wait like Xan and Kim, or Cole and Silver, who still haven’t even gotten married.

I have no doubt that Teal will kick arse as a mother. It’s not that she doesn’t care, it’s that she’s selective when it comes to the ones she cares about, and I’m positive that our child will make the top of that list. After me, of course.

“Didn’t you say we should wait?” I ask. “Are you okay with it?”

She nods frantically. “I can’t wait when it comes to you, Ronan. You make me want to burn every obstacle in the way as long as you’re by my side.”

“That’s because you’re smart as fuck, ma belle. You know what’s up.”

She laughs, her dark eyes sparkling.

I place my hand on her stomach. “So our offspring is in here?”

“Yes. If he or she is anything like you, we’re going to have our hands full.”

“Hey! I was a good boy. Ask Lars. Actually, no, I gave him hell whenever he made me drink milk. Ask Mum. She’ll tell you how much of a good boy I was.”

“You mean, I should ask the same Charlotte who’s always on your side, no matter what you do?”

“I’m her miracle, love. She has to be on my side. That’s how it works.”

“You’re unbelievable.”

“Not more than this.” I keep touching her stomach, trying to find something, anything. “Are you sure there’s a living being here?”

“Yeah, it just doesn’t show now.”

“Shit. Does this mean I shouldn’t have fucked you yesterday?”

“Elsa mentioned that the doctor said it was fine.”

“Thank fuck for that.” I grin. “Because I’m in the mood to celebrate.”