Chapter 41- Déjà Vu

As I stepped outside, the cool wind surrounded me. Shivering, I walked furthermore to the office.

Today I didn't have to go to hospital and Rhea forgot her lunch and asked me to give it to her. As I was walking pulled of block to the office, I thought of my everyday routine.

Before I always used to stop by my favorite place and pick up a bagel then head to the cab I always took to the office. Now, it's very different. Most of the times, I don't even get to eat the whole day. Now, I take my own car and haven't touched a bagel for a long time.

Slowly I walked into the office and the smell of lavender was everywhere.

It smelled exactly the same as when I first met Rhea. She broke the glass and lavender smell consumed the entire office.

I looked around to find Rhea because she told me she would wait at the door for me.

When I look up, I see her walking into Jeremy's room. I was about to call her name out loud but then realized that it would've been embarrassing.

Instead, I decided to walk upstairs to Jeremy's room. Just as I opened the door, I saw Rhea, Jeremy, Catalina and Chase standing and working on a project.

They all looked up and my eyes met Chase' for the first time in a while. I wanted to leave and never look at him again but something kept me frozen.

I breathed out and shut the door behind me quickly, before running downstairs. "Olive? Olive?" Rhea called out behind me as she followed me.

"I'm sorry Rhea but here," I handed her lunch to her and turned around.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

"He was there. He- he... he looked right at me and I couldn't move. I can't ever come back here Rhea, ever," I explained and Rhea nodded.

"I'm sorry I asked you to come. I should've waited in the front but we have this huge deal and I couldn't leave the others," Rhea explained.

"It's fine. I'll uh- I'll go," I said and she nodded.

"Wait," she said and I turned to face her. "What are you going to wear to your date tonight?"

"I- I can't think about that right now Rhea. Pick something out for me when you get home. I'm going to go hit the bar," I replied and she nodded.

___

"Can I get a martini please?" I asked the guy at the bar and he nodded.

"Coming right up," he replied and started mixing drinks.

There weren't many people in the bar because it was daytime. But, there were couple of them who were having drinks.

Suddenly the door opened, revealing a familiar figure which I have been wanting to avoid. What's he doing here? I quickly pulled my bangs down and slowly covered my face with my hair.

"Olive," he called out but I didn't turn around.

"Here," the bartender gave me my drink and I quickly chugged it.

"Another one," I asked and he started mixing drinks again.

"Olive," he called out again and I didn't reply to him. "I want to talk to you Olive."

I didn't turn around to face him nor did I reply to him. I treated him like he didn't even exist to me. "Goddammit Olive, I want to talk," he said and turned me around to face him.

There I saw Chase. He was hurt. His facial expressions and dark circles under his eyes showed that he was sad and didn't get enough sleep.

He deserves it.

He left me and that's how I looked for a whole week before finally trying to move on. He should feel the pain that I felt.

"Olive I-" he started as his hand made their way to me but I backed away. "I- I know this is all my fault. I know I hurt you. I know you can never forgive me but can you at least try?" He asked and I looked at him.

"Forgive you?" I asked. "You have the guts to ask for forgiveness after what you did?"

"I know and I'm sorry for everything Olive. I know I made a terrible mistake of not believing you and a terrible decision to break up with you. But, if you can, would you please forgive me?"

"No," I said. "You hurt me Chase. You hurt me in the most unimaginable way possible. I thought I could trust you. I thought you won't leave my side. But you did. You didn't believe me when I was telling the truth. You didn't trust me. I can't unsee everything."

"I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you. I'm sorry for not believing you. I'm sorry for not trusting you. I'm sorry for not being there for you. I'm sorry for being a jerk. I'm so sorry Olive."

I didn't say anything so he kept going on.

"I know I can't turn back the time. I know we can't unsee everything. But, if we could. Only if we could, I would do anything to be with you."

I was taken aback by what he just said. He sincerely wants to be with me. I'm not going to give in that easily so I stood there sternly, looking at him.

"I'm not lying nor asking you to forgive me. I just want you to know that I love you. I have been in love with you since the day I met you. You were different. You weren't one of those girls who throw themselves at me nor were you wanting to get attention. You were just in your own world. That's what I love about you Olive."

I stood there, looking at him while he spoke with all his heart. His apology was sincere but I was hurt. He hurt me really bad and an apology just isn't enough.

"If you could ever forgive me, I'll always be around. Don't give her another shot or she'll pass out," he said and turned to leave. "Also, I'm so sorry Olive."

With that he left.

He apologized sincerely but I'm still hurt. I'm happy to see him and apologize but I'm hurt because everything he said to me.

I looked at the bartender and he didn't make my drink. He listened to chase, who knows my limit.

I paid the bartender and left.

___

Hey guys I'm sorry for all the confusion. This book is not ending yet. My goal was to at least get to chapter 40 and we made it. But, this book will continue on until further notice.

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