[27]

"What?"

Parker's eyes were too hopeful, wide with eagerness. Whereas my eyes were filled with tears, ready to spill out some more.

Now everything had come to me, clearing up like the break of dawn. Parker was leaving, but he wasn't leaving me behind. He wanted me to follow him.

His offer wasn't bad, but it wasn't good either.

"I'm not going to leave you, Camsy," said Parker. "As much as this is important, you also are to me. So I want you to come with me to London.

"I'm not sure when I'll return, maybe in a couple of months. But I don't want to take any risks. If you do come with me, you can build yourself an image away from America. You could be Europe's best wedding planner as well."

His eyes scanned mine as he spoke excitedly, but even as he spoke, I already knew my decision.

"I-"

Now I was lost for words. How was I supposed to leave everything behind and just go with him? I had a business, a family, friends...

"When are you leaving?" I inquired.

"Tomorrow morning," was his quick reply. "I know it's sudden, just like this entire contract. But it's also a dream come true. You know how important this is, right?"

I did. However, I wish I didn't. Maybe then I would be able to selfishly request him to stay behind, to forget this gig because he could score another one in the future.

The truth was, I realized I had been selfish before now. I was hating him for wanting to follow his career and accusing him of being worse than the rest of my exes. I felt disgusted at myself.

And now, I was sure my decision would only make me a worse person.

I shook my head free of his hold and stepped back, seeing the hurt begin to build up in his green eyes.

"I can't," I choked out, refraining from watching him. I just couldn't watch him get broken by my words. I cast my gaze to the tiles beneath my feet. "I can't go with you."

Hearing Parker approach me, I put a hand up, staring back at his figure. I regretted that action immediately. Pain and rejection swirled in his eyes.

"Why can't you?" He asked. For the first time, his voice grew hoarse, thickened by emotion. It felt like my chest was being pricked by needles. "You won't be leaving too much behind. And this is a chance to grow your empire-"

"My empire is right here!" I cut him off, a stray tear rolling down my cheek. How could I explain to him that I couldn't just leave everything behind and follow him to London? All the way across the world!

"I have my parents, Simone, and Mida. I even have a lot of weddings on my list that need my attention!"

"You could have double that if you came with me!" Parker shouted, not out of anger. Out of heavy desire, forcing me not to reject his offer. "You could reach out to your family if you wanted to. Hell, they could even come visit you!"

My heartbeat rate increased.

"I can't, Parker!" I shouted back. "I'm sorry, but I can't. What you are requesting is too much for me to grant."

The hurt never left Parker's expression, even when he laughed humorlessly. "Yet you requested me to grant you the same thing."

My lips parted. "I didn't know that you were leaving to pursue your career. If I did, I would never have said all that."

"That's your problem, Camsy," he spat venom. "You're too scared to come out of that little bubble you've put yourself in. Always believing that everyone will leave you, forgetting that not everyone's the same. You're judgemental and, most times, insensitive. You've become selfish, babe."

I gasped, feeling like he'd delivered a blow to me. A frown took its place on my lips. "I'm not selfish! I might be insecure, but I know what to ask of someone and what not to. You're calling me selfish because I'm not giving in to your selfishness, and I never will!"

More hurt crossed his eyes, mixing with unmeasured rage. Our chests heaved in sync, the tense air around us only feeding our aggravation. When I decided I was through with the staring contest we were currently in, I turned away from him.

I hated him for doing this, but I hated that we were arguing more. All I wanted to do was turn back around and hug him. Hold on to him and never let go. But how long was going to hold on before he'd pry me off and head on to London?

If this was his image of me, then why did he make me believe in something that never existed?

Behind me, I heard Parker sigh. "Camsy, I-"

"Save it," I snapped, sounding a lot harsher than I intended but not giving a donkey's butt about it. Then without looking at him, I hurried towards the door, wiping my tears all the way.

"Camsy, wait," he tried again.

This time, I stopped a few inches from the door and turned to face him. The man I was beginning to fall for. My gaze latched on to him, momentarily rendering myself breathless. The tears didn't stop coming.

How was I supposed to love again?

"Let's talk about this," he offered, stepping towards me gingerly. "Please don't walk away again. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for saying that. It's just-"

"I'm not walking away," I replied. "I just need some time away."

His brows pulled together, and his forehead creased as he plucked a bunch of keys from his pocket. Watching me carefully, he said, "we could go somewhere peaceful, away from here. Maybe we could even-"

"No, Parker," I cut him off, staring him dead in the eye. My voice wavered. "I need some time away from you."

The effect of my words on him was a speechless expression that looked like he'd been slapped. As much as I hated this, I needed to breathe, to think rationally. And apparently, talking to him wasn't working.

I needed time to myself, to cry, and to let him go.

He needed space too, and I wasn't going to be selfish enough to deny him that.

"You need space too, Parker."

He shook his head, his voice coming out firm. "No, we need to talk. This isn't talking. What we need is to figure this out before tomorrow."

"You're right," I nodded. "But in order to figure something out, we both need our time apart."

"But-" he cut himself off, looking like I'd cut off his air supply.

My head, my heart, everything was pounding. I couldn't do this.

So without saying another word, I exited the room, leaving a color-drained Parker behind.

Mida's room was the closest to mine, and given that my legs felt like they were about to wither away and die, it was my only option. In other words, I burst into the room with tears blurring my vision and Parker clouding my mind. He was leaving by the morning, and I was beginning to regret my decision to put some space between us.

My attention returned to reality when I heard the foot of a chair scrub against the floor.

"Cammie!" Mida exclaimed, wearing a worried look. Simone, who sat beside her, stood up abruptly and rushed to my side, closely followed by Mida.

She pulled me into her embrace and held me in place for moments that felt like ages, letting me cry until I was nothing but a whimpering mess.

Had I made the right choice? Was Parker ever going to forgive me for choosing my career here over him? What did this mean for us?

Were we even a "we" anymore?

Slowly, Mida and Simone led me to a seat. A glass of water appeared before me almost instantly. The three of us looked at Mrs. Wellington, who stood over my seated figure with a warm smile. The nicest I'd seen on her ever since we'd met. Part of me saw the smile as a threat, though: accept my kindness or forever have to put up with the other me.

I took the glass and downed its contents. I wondered what she was doy in Mida's room with Simone as well, but I didn't ask the question. It was the least of my problems right then.

"You look terrible, by the way," she commented, raising a brow at me. Shortly after, she laughed. It didn't sound sinister, but it irked me to the bone. I sat dumbfounded and watched her.

When she looked down at me, she had pity in her eyes. "You poor thing, I can only imagine how it must feel to let him go."

Mida gasped. "Garth's leaving?"

Simone turned to her with raised eyebrows. "You didn't know? He got a gig with ARcane."

Just great. Why don't you remind me of everything I wanted to forget?

"I needed some time away from him to think." Mrs. Wellington was the last person I thought I'd be talking to about my love problems, but here I was. "I can't help but think I should have agreed to go with him."

"He wanted you to go with him, and you turned him down?" She sounded surprised.

More guilt welled up inside me. "I couldn't just leave everything behind so suddenly and go all the way across the world! I have a life here."

Mrs. Wellington sighed and sat on the seat next to mine. "I won't say I understand because I don't," she said honestly. "I thought you loved him?"

I didn't bother arguing because I knew she was right. I loved Parker. That was why it was so hard to watch him leave. I felt helpless at this point.

"I do," I declared, causing Mida and Simone to squeal in glee. Mrs. Wellington and I ignored them. "It's just too sudden, and I don't feel ready to jump into any hasty decisions yet."

She thought about my words for a moment, breaking into a small smile after. "Well then, I think you made the right decision. The both of you are obviously still hurting, unable to let go of your past experiences with love. You're fighting with each other to keep each other, and that is never going to work."

For the first time, I agreed with her. Simone and Mida did too.

"Mrs. Wellington is right," Mida said. "Sometimes, you have to break a relationship to fix it."

That didn't make sense right then, but I was hoping it would in the future.

Simone groaned. "I can't believe how messed up this is. After everything we did to pull the two of you together!" If I didn't know better, I would have thought she was on the verge of tears.

"They're going to bounce back," Mrs. Wellington stated, watching me pointedly. "Garth is going to return, and your story will have the happily ever after it deserves.

"Garth told me how important you are to him, and this just proves it. If he was willing to be selfish and defy all odds by wanting you to go with him to London, then you must be very special to him." She smiled. "I'm sorry for giving you a hard time. I just didn't want a repeat of Clare. I hope you can understand. He's my youngest son."

Honestly, I understood. I'd understood that night she had come onto me before the bachelorette party. She was just trying to find the best woman for her son.

"It's fine." I smiled back at her. My smile didn't last two seconds before it fell, and my shoulders sulked. I wondered how Parker was doing.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. "You don't have to worry about him," Simone beamed. "I bet Shawn's already talking to him as well."

I hoped so.

"Now, what do I do?" I asked them.

"Now you wait for the morning to come, and then you go after your man," Mrs. Wellington answered.

"Yeah!" Mida added. "You could bid him a romantic goodbye like in all those movies."

"This isn't a movie, Mida," Simone reprimanded her.

But, I thought, it felt like it was.