CH 22.2
Fantasy Farm
translator: baumkuchen editor: ellabells
After the meal, they said their goodbyes, and returned to their respective homes.
Lu Qingjiu took a shower, then sat himself down in front of the computer to play some games. As he played, he suddenly thought of something, and opened up a search browser and entered two words, âWen-yaoâ. Following that, he then saw that this type of fish had been recorded in the Classic of Mountains and Seas. Often classified as a ray, it has the shape of a carp, a fish body yet with the wings of a bird; an ash-grey body yet a white head with a red beak. It frequents the West Seas, has the voice of a luan. They taste sour and sweet, and eating them can cure the crazed. Seeing them is a sign of a good harvest.
The approximate meaning was that this bird looked similar to a ray, and sounded similar to a luan. It had a sweet and sour taste, and eating it could cure insanity.
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After reading this passage, Lu Qingjiu fell silent, then recalled the taste of the fish with pickled vegetables he just ate, and felt that this Classic of Mountains and Seas was really accurate.
Speaking of the Classic of Mountains and Seas, Lu Qingjiu vaguely remembered that there seemed to be many interesting creatures recorded in it. After a moment of consideration, he directly bought one online, planning to find some time to read it.
Having eaten too much that night, exhaustion crept up on him quickly. Since Lu Qingjiu had come to Shuifu village, he no longer knew how to spell the word insomnia. He was falling asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow every day.
That night was no exception. Lu Qingjiu laid down on the bed, covering his stomach with a small blanket. The weather was becoming hotter and hotter. In two days, he would be able to spread out a woven mat. He closed his eyes and drifted off amidst the chirping of insects.
But in the middle of the night, the originally deep asleep Lu Qingjiu heard someoneâs shrill screech. When he groggily awoke from his dream, his first reaction was, hadnât Zhang Chuyang already grown hair? Why did he start shouting again?!
However, when he woke up fully and listened closer, he found that this screech wasnât Zhang Chuyangâs, rather, it was an incredibly unfamiliar voice.
âWho is it? Whoâs outside?!â Still in his pajamas, Lu Qingjiu rushed into the courtyard.
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The bright moon hanging in the sky was obscured by heavy clouds. Lu Qingjiu could only vaguely make out what seemed to be two people lying in his courtyard. The entrance to his home was wide open, as if it was broken by someone from outside. Alarmed, Lu Qingjiu immediately realised that burglars had entered his home. He grabbed a nearby stick, which was one of the sticks remaining from when he built the grape trellis, and shouted, âWhoâs there!â
However, the two men lay motionless in the courtyard. Lu Qingjiu didnât dare to get closer, turning and going to the nearby corridor and turning on the lights in the courtyard.
The lightbulbs shone brightly, illuminating the entire courtyard, allowing Lu Qingjiu to finally see what exactly was going on.
He saw two young men laying on the ground of his courtyard, their faces covered with blood, their mouths letting out weak moans. Nearby, there were actually two daggers stained with fresh blood which were probably brought by them.
Even though Lu Qingjiu didnât know what had happened, his first reaction was to call the police. On the phone, after the policeman heard about the situation, he said that theyâd immediately come over, and asked Lu Qingjiu to first check on the two men. If necessary, he should help them call an ambulance in advance.
Lu Qingjiu agreed. He hung up and, wooden stick in hand, carefully made his way over to the two men. He noticed that the two men were covered in densely packed little holes, Â as if theyâd been pecked by something. The two of them were already half-unconscious from the pain, groaning non-stop from where they collapsed.
Lu Qingjiuâs gaze swept the courtyard. Noticing some blood on the ground, he followed the trail, stopping before the entrance to his chicken coop.
The chicks were usually very obedient, when it rained or got dark, without the need for anyone to herd them, they would obediently run into the chicken coop themselves. Hence, the door to the chicken coop was never locked, letting the chicks move around by themselves.
Lu Qingjiu opened the door to the coop and saw blood streaked everywhere in the coop. But that wasnât the important point. The important point was that almost every chicken was covered in blood. At first, Lu Qingjiu had thought that they were hurt, but upon catching one and checking it, he found that these chickens were all in high spirits, not at all like theyâd been hurt. Then, was the blood on their bodies all from the wounds of those two thieves? Upon thinking of this, Lu Qingjiu slowly turned to look at the two people still on the ground and moaning in pain.
At some point, Bai Yuehu was also disturbed from his sleep. He was leaning lazily against the doorframe, watching the ruckus in the courtyard.
Lu Qingjiu said, âGood evening.â
âGood evening,â Bai Yuehu replied softly.
Lu Qingjiu knew he definitely knew exactly what had happened. So he slowly made his way to Bai Yuehuâs side, pointing at the two fallen, unable to get up men and said, âIâve already called the police. Those two arenât in life-threatening danger right?â
Bai Yuehu shook his head.
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Lu Qingjiu said, âIt couldnât have beenâ¦â
Before he could hesitantly get out even half of his sentence, Bai Yuehu nodded, completely serious, âItâs exactly as you imagined.â
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â Holy shit, it was really the chickens?!
âSo those arenât even chickens?â Lu Qingjiu asked, âWhat are they?â
Bai Yuehu replied, âEdible.â
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â
Right, in Bai Yuehuâs eyes, the world could be split into two categories: edible, and inedibleâ¦
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Lu Qingjiu thought for a moment, then asked, âThen, do they taste good?â
Bai Yuehu said, âVery good.â As he spoke the two words âvery goodâ, his eyes curved slightly, clearly in a very good mood, possibly because heâd thought of the taste of those chickens.
Since the people in the courtyard werenât in danger of losing their lives, Lu Qingjiu couldnât be bothered to call an ambulance for them. He picked up a damp towel, walked over to the chicken coop, and began cleaning the blood off the chickens. As he did so, he asked Bai Yuehu, âThey wonât peck me, right?â
âThey wonât,â Bai Yuehu said, âThey recognise their master.â
Lu Qingjiu asked, âAre they sentient?â
Bai Yuehu answered decisively, âNo.â
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â
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Bai Yuehu said, âTheyâre really not. Theyâre only good for being delicious.â
Lu Qingjiu didnât quite know whether to laugh or cry. However, the chicken in his hands was indeed obedient, showing no intention of pecking him. As he wiped them clean, he asked, âCan I beat these chickens in a fight?â
Bai Yuehu replied, âOhâ¦â
Lu Qingjiu turned back and gave him a look, âWhat does that âohâ of yours mean?â
Bai Yuehu said, âI was calculating the respective fighting capabilities of you and the chicken.â He fell silent once more, before saying, âTen against one.â
Lu Qingjiu was pleasantly surprised, âI can beat ten?â
Bai Yuehu, âTen of you can beat one.â
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â
Seeing that Lu Qingjiuâs expression was off, Bai Yuehu added, âDonât worry, when the time comes to eat them, Iâll handle the killing.â
Thanks so much for your hard work. Mister Lu, who watched the entire process, would like to express that he was very hurt. But seeing the two thieves writhing in incredible pain in the courtyard, but without any mortal wounds, he decided that itâd still be best if he didnât try to test his chickensâ fighting power.
At about 4am, the police arrived. The first thing they saw were the two thieves, who were almost unconscious from pain, and Lu Qingjiu, who was sitting in the courtyard, taking a nap.
âHey, Lu Qingjiu,â The police officer whoâd arrived was someone familiar. It was the Hu Shu who came to investigate the female corpse in Lu Qingjiuâs inner courtyard from last time. He said, âWhy is it you again.â
Lu Qingjiu said, âHow could I know Iâd be so unlucky. These two broke the lock on my gate and planned on coming in and robbing the place.â
âThen how did they get those wounds?â Hu Shu asked.
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âHow would I know?â Lu Qingjiu replied, âBy the time I came out, they were already on the ground. If you donât believe me, you can ask them.â
The two people were barely conscious from the pain. They werenât able to answer the policeâs questions at all. But after seeing their faces, Hu Shu found that these two were actually fugitives from the city. A week ago, they were charged for a murder-robbery and currently wanted for their crimes by the entire city. Who knew they would run into Lu Qingjiuâs home. On closer thought, it might have been that Lu Qingjiu attracted their attention when buying meat in town that morning.
âAlright, Iâll take these people away first,â Hu Shu said, âRemember to come by the station to give a statement.â
âWhy do I have to come by and give another statement? I donât know anything,â Lu Qingjiu felt utterly helpless.
âThat canât be right,â Hu Shu said, âThey have so many wounds on their body and thereâs only you in this courtyard. If it wasnât you, who did it? Are you going to say it was your chickens?â He casually pointed at the chicken coop by the side of the courtyard.
Lu Qingjiu, ââ¦â F*ck, it really was done by his chickens. But he couldnât say that, if he did, no one would believe him. So in the end, he could only look at Hu Shu with a gaze filled with bitterness.
Hu Shu trembled at the look in Lu Qingjiuâs eyes. He said, âDonât stare at me like that. Even though I know you may be innocent, we still have to follow proper procedures.â
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âFine,â Lu Qingjiu gave in.
âRight,â Before Hu Shu brought the two men away, he asked in a small voice, âThere hasnât been any more problems with the well in your inner courtyard, right?â
Lu Qingjiu said, âOh⦠No⦠probably?â
Hu Shu, âWhy do you say that so hesitantly?â
Lu Qingjiu said, âI canât say for sure whether or not what happened today was caused by the thing in that well, no?â
Hu Shu trembled. He asked, âAre you being serious?â
Lu Qingjiu just blinked, neither confirming nor denying anything. He felt as if Hu Shu wanted to say something else, but was incredibly hesitant, as if trying to figure something out.
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Silence fell between the two. In the end, Hu Shu wasnât able to hold it in and asked, âAre you good at dealing with these kinds of matters?â
Lu Qingjiu asked, âWhat kind of matters?â
Hu Shu said, âThose kinds of supernatural events.â
Lu Qingjiu said, âNo, that was my first time dealing with that kind of thing too.â
With eyes full of doubt, Hu Shu asked, âReally?â
Lu Qingjiu nodded earnestly.
Seeing that Lu Qingjiu had no plans on opening up, Hu Shuâs mouth opened, but in the end, he said nothing, simply turning and leaving. As he watched him go, Lu Qingjiu felt as if he still had a lot he wanted to say, but for some reason, wasnât able to say it. However, that had nothing to do with him. Lu Qingjiu looked over at his chicken coop and sighed. The blood on his chickens bodies hadnât been completely wiped clean yet. He should probably get back to wiping them again with a towel, or else the whole courtyard would probably be covered in blood the next morning.