25

Song: Young Blood- The Naked and Famous

"Happy New Year!" I screamed in his lips just after the cliche midnight kiss. He repeated the words and brought me in once more.

I snuggled into his arms as we sat on the roof of Riley's house sharing a package of chocolate chip cookie dough I stole from her fridge. After our few rounds of beer pong, that Riley and I won reclaiming our throne, Cal wanted to steal me away for the countdown. I grabbed a snack and let him whisk me away.

Somehow he managed to find a way to her roof and we sat there with a blanket between us looking at the stars and moon, until the final minutes of the year. When we heard everyone else count down we joined in from our corner of the world.

It was funny how he managed to find his way up onto the roof. Riley and I never got on her roof. It was always easy to get up here, but we never did. I guess it was because we never really were here except for her parties.

We were still watching the fireworks when Riley peeked her head out of the open window yelling "I knew I would find you out here KP! Get in here so I can have my new year's kiss!" Which caused me to laugh and she continued. "Besides Liam is here and Tyler and Mason and you don't want our drunk asses on the roof because we will do it!" I heard their hollers in the background and knew our alone time was up.

We should have snuck out of the party when we had the chance. I was ready. I wanted to be with him. I wanted more. He was right though, we couldn't do anything like that on a roof.

"Okay okay, we are coming!" I surrendered rolling my eyes at Cal grabbing his hand to steady myself before making our way back to the window.

I gave Riley a big fat kiss on the cheek and told her happy new year wrapping my arms around her. We stood there, arms wrapped around each other for a long time. I didn't mind it, she gave great hugs. She was my best friend after all.

"You're in deep KP," Riley whispered in my ear.

"I know," I whispered back.

"The deep end." She giggled at the thought.

"The deepest of deep ends," I replied back with a smile.

It wasn't a bad thing to be in the deep end if you wanted to. It was just a long way to the surface if all else failed. Good thing I could swim.

She wrapped me in her arms and tries to dance turning us in a circle, but she lost her balance twisting her foot and pulling both of us to the floor. Throwing us both into a fit of giggles, the boys decided to join in as Tyler yelled dog pile and suddenly the weight of the world was on me. We continued to scream at them to get up throwing punches to whoever we can until finally Mason rolled off of me and I could breathe again. I swore the boys weighed a million pounds each.

"Mason, what are you corn-fed?" I huffed trying to catch my breath, holding out my hand so he can pull me up.

"It's bulking season KP you know the rules." He shrugged his shoulders.

"Mmmm I don't know dude you're looking a little small." I heard Riley tell him as she gave his muscles a squeeze.

I started to laugh as Mason rolled his eyes making some comment about how she knows he's not small. This was when I left the conversation to go find Liam or Cal because both have seemed to have left the room.

Cal was supposed to be our ride. He offered not wanting to drink tonight. I wasn't going to drink anyway, but I thought it was a sweet gesture of him. Besides, maybe there was still time to convince him to leave some more time for us to be alone.

I squeezed through people in the hallway and the living room still no sign of either boy. Finally, I found Liam in the kitchen with a bowl of Cheetos. He was totally high which made me laugh. I went up to him and bumped him with my hip.

"Baby sister!" He screamed in my ear over the music.

"You're only older than me buy three minutes." I rolled my eyes grabbing some Cheetos from the bowl. I shoved a handful into my mouth rolling my eyes at him when he tried to take them away.

We sat in silence for a few minutes just people watching and sharing Cheeto Puffs. I missed hanging out with him. I felt that recently I haven't been able to as much.

Maybe because he tried to avoid me when I was with Cal. I also avoided them when they were together. We had an unspoken rule of giving each other time with Cal. It was funny thinking we shared him.

Then he finally asked, "do you ever miss mom?"

The question kind of shocked me and I began to choke on the Cheeto puff that I had just put in my mouth. I knew Liam took mom leaving really hard, he was always her favorite. They had a special bond, while she seemed a little disconnected from me.

Still, I was surprised that he brought it up all of a sudden. It definitely threw me off guard. We never really talk about her, only sometimes. We even liked to play the game of how different would we be if she actually stuck around.

"Uh, I guess sometimes," I mumbled reaching for another Cheeto. "It's hard to miss someone you don't know," I said looking at him.

"Yeah but she's our mom Ken." He said flatly. He threw his head dramatically to the side looking at me waiting for me to respond. He had a point, but was she really our mom? I would consider Tish more of my mom.

"But do you miss her or miss the thought of her?" I responded as my eyes lead me away from the conversation, and the dancing going on in the living room. Then I quickly said, "I do miss her and it's okay if you miss her too."

It wasn't a total lie. I did miss the idea of her. Not as much as Liam did. I always thought it was okay to miss her, but I didn't know what there was to miss. I didn't have that many memories of her.

I had a few here and there, but none really worth remembering. I had a few photos that our dad kept to show us so we knew who she was, but other than that there wasn't much. She was a stranger to me.

It wasn't like there was this huge gaping hole in my life where she should be. I had a mom, and Tish was great. There was a tiny hole, just barely visible. I guess it was what our mom could have been. Then again, we wouldn't have Tish or Livi, and I wouldn't trade them for anything.

"Come dance!" Riley walked up to us grabbing both of our arms interrupting my thoughts.

I was never one to dance but why the hell not at this point in the night. Plus I still hadn't found Cal anywhere so I couldn't use him as an excuse.

So I threw my head back and let the music and Riley guided me with the rest of our friends and classmates here. It was my last week of freedom before I went back to my club swim team, and classes started so I wanted to try to enjoy what I could.

After a few songs of spinning and twirling with Riley, I finally pulled away to grab water and find Cal, because truthfully I was starting to get worried. I walked past the kitchen with the bottle in my hands and still no sign of him. I just kind of missed spending time with him by myself. It was selfish but it was the truth.

Beginning to freak out I went outside to see if his beat-up truck was out there and that's where I found him. Only he's wasn't alone, he's with Tyler, and things seemed a little intense. I began to walk closer slowly a little afraid to interrupt.

I've seen all the guys in heated conversations with each other and they were always scary and intense as this one. You always had to approach them with caution. Especially when it was between two friends.

"No Ty I'm over this!" I heard Cal groan throwing his hands up clearly frustrated.

"Oh, c'mon man you were the one that agreed you can't just back out it's the rules." I saw his smirk. Tyler was facing me but still hadn't seen me walking towards them, while Cal's back was to me.

"Whatever man I'm just sick of these games." I heard Cal mumble. He kicked at something on the ground. I wasn't sure if it was a rock or something imaginary.

"Is everything okay?" I asked gently tapping him on the shoulder.

He turned around suddenly looking a little nervous. Biting his lip he asks, "how much of that did you hear?" I just shook my head pretending I didn't hear anything besides the last sentence.

"You guys just looked a little intense that's all." I shrugged picking at my fingernail polish. I didn't want to meet his eyes. They were full of anger, and I didn't want him to think I heard anything. Besides, I didn't even know what I heard.

"Happy New Year Kenny." Tyler winked at me before sauntering back towards the party.

"Are you sure you're okay?" I asked again facing him.

He was clenching his jaw in frustration. I knew he was holding back whatever he was feeling. It wasn't me he was mad at and he didn't want to blow off all his steam on me. At least I hoped.

He leaned forward and kissed me. It was passionate and I could feel it in my toes. But it was also hungry. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it a few times waiting for me to answer.

"Can we just get out of here?" He whispered in my ear sending shivers down my spine.

"Yes."