54: Death

I longed for warmth, for the first time in my life. A coldness crawled from the tips of my toes to the ends of my head, and surged deep into my bones. I could feel myself tremble to create heat but heat seemed but a mere dream. An impossibility. I was suspended in the air, dangling by nothing, fixed in place. An emptiness surrounded me, blackness without light, nothing without sight.

Then at once there was light behind my eyelids. And there was something soft against my back, as warmth crawled back into my body, but only so little that I knew it wasn't all of it. But it was enough to be comfortable. Too comfortable, I didn't want to wake. But I did. For two things, the smell of a pot of stew on the stove and the sound of wood being chopped. Just like every morning.

Just like home.

My eyes snapped open. I was in my room, that was for certain. A ferocious hope surged through me, countered only by a gripping fear that held me in bed.

Where my heart should have been working was a stillness to my body. My chest was quiet and still. Almost empty. That forced me to sit up, with a courage diluted by confusion. My hands felt frigid in each other.

If something was wrong within me nothing was wrong outside. The sun had just begun to climb across the blue sky decorated by the occasional cloud. The wheat beyond my window swayed to the passing breeze. And the sounds and smell of every morning remained.

I wasn't dreaming. Dreams couldn't have been as vivid, familiar, as real this. I was here. I was home.

I stood and moved to my door. Gripped the handle. Dropped my hand. Tried again but dropped it again. My chest twisted into a knot but still managed to feel hollow. I stepped away, swallowed hard.

My hope held like a boulder by a string.

I pulled the door open. The boulder dropped.

My little home was empty. Now silent, cold, without a scent in the world. Mom wasn't in the kitchen. Dad wasn't out back chopping wood. Hirai wasn't out doing something reckless. Ray wasn't by Mom's side pestering her with a million questions.

But there was a man at the table. A man I didn't recognize. He was looking at me, staring, watching. He looked every bit real, every bit alive, with bright eyes like the setting sun, and a pleased smile. But if he was real then everything else wasn't.

"Good morning Miss Molieilai," he said, interlocking his fingers on the table, his gaze never leaving me. "How was the transit? Cold, as nothingness should be, I hope."

"It's just Mo," I replied, calmer than I wanted my response to be.

The corner of his mouth quirked. He nodded, his eyes leaving me to survey the room instead. "Of course, you're still just Mo." He was an undeniably attractive man, with impeccable features and a strong body, dressed in noble's garments. But that did not excuse his intrusion.

"What does that mean?" I took a step forward. "Who are you and why are you in my house?"

"My. Just like mortals to place temporary claims on eternal things." He scowled, though that did little to disrupt his beauty.

"Who are you?" This time I took a step back. Beacuse I had enough sense to feel unsafe despite the steadiness of my chest.

His amber eyes bore through me. I felt exposed. He saw me and through me and past me. He clicked his tongue and looked skyward. "I am known by many names across the lands but in all these stories I am but an essence of Earth."

"Earth?"

His gaze found mine again, a vivacious glint in his eyes. "The Beast, of course."

"You're the Beast?" I blurted.

He scoffed. "Are you hard of hearing? I said essence, did I not? I am not the beast in itself but a mere fraction of its nature. The fraction that oversees the end of life."

At that I stared down at my arms, noting the emptiness of my chest and the coldness of my skin. "You're..."

"Death," he finished. "Yes yes I know, I'm much more alluring then my tales portray."

"I'm dead?"

His head bobbed. "Somewhere between life and death, yes."

"Then I'm dying?"

He cleaned beneath a fingernail with the other intently. "Sure."

"But why am I here? And how did I die? And what about..." My heart should have been pounding violently in my chest then. But it was silent. "It can't be..."

"You're here," he said, more interested in his nails than with me, "because I've yet to decide what to do with you."

"What does that mean?" I stared at the door longingly but I had a striking feeling that that would be useless.

"It means," he sighed. "You're not supposed to be dead. You see, time has not listed you, yet." I swallowed that information like hard dry bread. Then there was a scroll on the table, under his hand. He ran a slender finger down the page, tsking. Returning his eyes to me, he scowled. "But here you are waiting to be directed to your eternity."

"Does this usually happen? Do people usually get lost between life and death?"

He gave an amused smile as he regarded me with his piercing gaze. "You're a special case. Time has a reason for keeping you, and if I were to take you away now it would offset certain things."

"What ever could I offset? I'm about as significant as a fly."

"Ignorance is forgivable, I suppose." His eyes rolled. His tone turned stern. "If you were to die right now, many others will follow. Your future is written on the foundation of Earth. If it were never to come to pass there will be an indefinite imbalance. One I would not particularly enjoy. With random surges of the dead, I'd be worked like a dog."

I tried my best to place his words. But I only came up short. Whatever he meant I didn't know, not yet. But one thing was for certain, he didn't seem authorized to allow my death.

"What if I want to stay?" I asked.

A curiosity sparked in his eyes. "An unintentional death, choosing death over a second chance. Why I've only encountered such a couple 100 million times."

"Is it my choice to make?"

"It is my choice, but I'm feeling generous so I shall bestow upon you the choice," he explained. "But I don't believe you'd prefer it. Not with your attachments."

"Where would I go if I chose death?"

He laughed. A big hearty laugh. And then his countenance turned dark. "Ah ah ah, that is something only you know. I am but an intercession for your soul. Now are you certain you wish to stay?"

"I'll leave." I said this with a rare firmness.

He nodded and stood.

"But," I added, "my family." He raised a brow. I found the gem at the base of my neck. "Are they on your list?"

His eyes narrowed. "Who belongs on my list is my business and mine alone." He looked away, sighing. "But something tells me that if I tell you they were you'd choose to stay despite the risks. Fortunately for us both, they aren't. They're in Aigar's possession I believe."

I nodded. "I have many questions."

"So does every other mortal," he grunted. "You should hurry back now, life awaits." He shooed me nonchalantly.

I stepped up to the door. The door I had walked through more times than I can count. A door that held my hand print in paint and my name etched into its planks. The door where mom and dad met me.

I turned round. Death had folded his arms over his chest and was tapping his foot impatiently. "Thank you. Is there anything I can do for you in return, I mean with you giving me a choice and all, surely I can repay the favour."

He curled his lips in disgust. "I am not some petty troll who demands payment from travelling folk. Nor do I require any sort of sustenance mortals can provide. Your standards of pleasures and solaces are far beneath mine."

"Alright." I turned away, relieved I could finally step out of his presence.

"Wait."

He blew a strand of sandy blonde hair away from his face, pouting. For an immortal being, he sure knew how to act like a child, or a pregnant woman with moodswings. "I might require something of you. Not right now, only when you are able. There is a human, her name is Doe. Find her and I shall come to you to retrieve her."

Death searching for a human. Interesting. "Who is she?"

"She is like you, a special case."

"I'll see what I can do." I hadn't the slightest idea where to start but I was willing to make the promise. "Goodbye, Sir Death."

He nodded, aloof. "Till we meet again, Miss Molieilai."

A/n: wazzup my good readers? How is everyone. Good? Bad? Well either way, never forget just how precious you are. You got this!