Chapter 24

Chapter Twenty – Four

Emilia had had enough. She was not going to sit idly by when two people who were so completely perfect for each other tip toed out of each other’s lives.

Jane’s memories were coming back; she had experienced some sort of flashback on the stairs so it meant that certain places, words, events and people could trigger the memories. Jane had remembered their conversation in Daniel’s study and she now knew how she felt about the Earl. It was now or never in Emilia’s mind.

She practically flew down the stairs back to where the rest of their party was configured in the dining room. The footmen had begun laying out a splendid breakfast but she wasn’t interested in eating.

Both Daniel and Sebastian stood as she entered the room but she set her eyes on Daniel.

“Em, are you alright? You look flushed,” Sebastian asked but Emilia didn’t answer him.

“You,” she practically growled as she walked up to Daniel. “You love her, do you not?” she demanded to know, regardless of her youthful audience. All of her children, bar Henry, and Sabine were all in the room staring at the spectacle that their mother was making.

Daniel furrowed his eyebrows. “I don’t see how it is any of you business, Lady Ethridge,” he said formally, though she could tell that her sudden question embarrassed him.

“Of course it is my business,” Emilia snapped. “We all love Jane, she is a sister, a daughter and an aunt to all of us, and we want to know what you plan to do about your affections!” she exclaimed.

Daniel’s dark brown eyes narrowed on her, and she felt slightly intimidated. “What do you expect me to do?” he challenged. “She doesn’t remember me. All she probably thinks now is that some old gentleman watches her every move.”

Emilia scoffed. “Then clearly you do not know our Jane. She is recalling things, as we were walking up the stairs she remembered quite an integral conversation that is important to your endeavour to secure her hand. She remembered the conversation that I am sure you overheard.”

Daniel’s eyes widened. “She did?” he asked.

“She did,” Emilia confirmed.

“What conversation?” Catherine demanded to know.

Emilia could tell that not one of the children had any idea of what the adults were talking about.

“Come with me,” Daniel instructed as he took Emilia’s hand and quickly took her from the dining room. He led her down the hallway and into a door that she had never noticed before. It was the same colour as the wall and it completely blended in. He opened it up and led her inside a narrow hallway that had several sets of staircases. Emilia realised it was the servants passage ways. He made sure that nobody was around before he spoke again. “You are absolutely sure?”

Emilia nodded. “She told me as much,” she replied. “She remembers how she feels about you, but she thinks that she has to leave, because of your wife. She told me in that conversation that she could not be second best, she wanted to be loved completely and she thought that you would never get past your wife. She thinks she must leave.”

Daniel’s face looked pained. “That is not true at all. It took this accident for me to know what I want and what I deserve. Eleanor would not want me to marinate in my own misery for the rest of my life.”

Emilia let out a frustrated sigh. “It should not be me that you tell this to,” she scolded. She wished men weren’t so blind. “You could string this out for months or years, or you could go upstairs and just tell her. She will leave and she will move on. She’ll marry another and you’ll both be miserable for the rest of your lives!”

“It is not that simple,” Daniel told her sadly. “I can’t just walk up there and say things that can’t be taken back if rejected.”

“Yes, you can,” she shot back angrily. “You didn’t know me five years ago, but I was quite a sour young widow. My husband ... well, well he did unmentionable things to me –” she started but was interrupted by an alarmed Daniel.

“Sebastian?!” he exclaimed.

“No!” Emilia gasped, surprised. “No, Sebastian is an absolute saint; he loves me and our children completely. I am talking about my first husband.”

“Of course,” Daniel replied, sounding less alarmed.

“Yes, well, when Sebastian arrived I was not a nice person. If we had just talked in the beginning once we realised our attraction then we could have saved ourselves a whole lot of grief ... of course there were other elements that prevented our nuptials, such as my first husband’s debts, but nevertheless, talking could have fixed several of our problems,” Emilia told him, surprisingly calmly.

Daniel took a deep breath before replying. “I wouldn’t know what to say to her,” he admitted finally. “I’m not that good at ... expressing my feelings.”

Emilia smiled in triumph. “Women don’t care about what you say, as long as your intentions are genuine then that’s all they need.”

“How can you know that?” he asked in disbelief.

Emilia’s eyes narrowed. “Do I not look like a woman?” she snapped.

“No, that’s not what I mean,” he quickly clarified. “I mean, did Sebastian not have some romantic speech when he proposed to you?”

Emilia pursed her lips. Sebastian had indeed delivered a very romantic proposal to her. “I think you’ll find that when you’re placed in that position the right words will find you,” she assured him. She knew Jane would not reject him purely because of his choice of words.

“I suddenly wish I could have a swig of whiskey before going above stairs,” he said timidly.

Emilia smiled at him reassuringly. “You will be great,” she promised, repeating the words that Catherine had said to her as she was about to get married. Those words made her know she could do it.

“It’s now or never,” he replied. In saying that, he made his way out of the servant’s passage ways and into the main part of the house. Emilia caught the door before it closed and watched him head off towards the main foyer that held the staircase to where Jane was.

Emilia wore a satisfied smile as she made her way back to the dining room. Her family had sat down to breakfast and were in the middle of breaking their bread as she re – entered the room.

Sebastian stood as she walked back in and she took the chair next to him. “What happened?” he asked so that only he and Catherine could hear his question.

“What happened is that we might be having a wedding here within the week,” she whispered.

A bright smile spread across Catherine’s face as she spoke the words. “Oh my goodness!” she said as tears filled her eyes.

“Oh, my goodness,” Sebastian said in a less than pleased tone.

“Oh, hush,” Emilia scolded. “This is good news.” Emilia looked over to the children’s plates and frowned as she noticed that they were all ignoring the eggs and having a glorious time having second helpings of scones with jam and cream. James in particular was having a lovely time with it. “James, you want some eggs instead of another scone, don’t you?” she asked in a tone that let him know she was serious.

James met his mother’s eyes cautiously. “Can’t I have scones instead of eggs?” he pleaded.

Little J was quick to intervene. “Eggs are good for you, James; too many scones will make you fat!”

Emilia muffled a giggle. Little J was far too intelligent for such a young girl. She would be exceptionally clever when she was grown and Emilia worried what she would be able to do with her life. Girls weren’t exactly welcomed into academic circles. She wanted her middle daughter to embrace her intelligence, but in some respects she wished it went away so that she did not have to suffer disappointment when she was older.

She couldn’t help but smile when she thought about the worry she felt all the time concerning her children. She wondered how long it would be until Jane felt the same worry, first over Sabine and then her own children. She couldn’t wait until Jane came to her for advice for that.

Jane found a suitable gown that she could wear after a few minutes. It was a simple white dress with a pink ribbon stitched along the under bust. She dressed quickly but couldn’t fasten the buttons at the back.

“Where is Emilia?” she wondered aloud. Surely finding a comb should not take so long. She sat down at the dresser and picked up her own comb and began detangling her curls. As she brushed the volume of her hair began to expand but she knew it could be controlled once Emilia arrived.

She finally heard the door open after about twenty minutes.

“Where have you been?” she exclaimed without turning around. “Never mind, I need you to fasten the buttons on my dress, I’ve been sitting here with my underclothes on show!”

“Jane,” said a voice that she recognised deeply.

Jane froze in her seat. She had her back to Daniel which meant that not only could he see her underclothes, but he was in her room when she had no chaperone. She turned around on her seat slowly to see him standing there. He looked ever so handsome considering he wasn’t properly dressed either. “What are you doing in here?” she asked carefully. “I was expecting Emilia.”

“I know,” he replied. “She found me ... and she told me what you remember.”

A deep blush covered Jane’s cheeks much to her humiliation. “Whatever she said was untrue. She was misinformed,” Jane said hurriedly, yet unconvincingly, trying to cover up her embarrassment.

“What she said was completely true, Jane, you mustn’t be bashful. I’m just as timid as you are,” he assured her. “May I come closer to you?” he asked.

Jane nodded without meeting his eyes. She had a feeling of what he was going to tell her. He was going to say something like ‘you can’t replace my wife’ and ‘get out of my house right away you stupid child’.

He crossed the room and knelt on the ground before her. Jane was puzzled. What was he doing down on one knee? She looked up and his brown eyes were incredibly sincere. “You are mesmerising,” he said simply.

“What?” she whispered.

“Emilia told me that I would know what to say when I was here and she is right. I know exactly what I want to tell you,” he said softly. He reached out and took her left hand in both of his. “I know that you think that Eleanor will get in between us, but she won’t. You have given me the closure that I needed. You are what I need.”

Jane couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Was she hallucinating again?

“In ancient times, when a man died, the Greeks asked only one question – ‘did he have passion?’. I don’t want to die knowing the answer to that question is ‘no’. You, Jane, are my passion. You and Sabine, and the slightly dysfunctional family we make, are my passion.”

Jane could feel her pulse increasing ever so slightly every breath she took. She didn’t know what to say or think. She didn’t know whether to be excited or happy of scared or reserved. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” she whispered.

Daniel nodded. “It will sound sadistic of me to say, but I believe your accident has made everything clear to me. I watched Eleanor die in that bed right there,” he gestured to Jane’s bed.

Jane’s eyes widened as she realised she was sleeping in Daniel’s old bedchamber. It frightened her to think that his wife had died there. And then she realised what he’d said. “How did me nearly dying help you find clarity?” she asked.

“Alright, perhaps this wasn’t as easy as I’d thought,” he said nervously. Jane could feel his hands beginning to sweat.

She decided to step in. She knew what he was trying to say and she ... well she loved him for it. “The only thing you need to tell me is if you love me enough to ask me to stay,” she said simply.

Daniel nodded after a short moment. “I do, Jane, I promise you I do. I’ve I have been living in fear. I was lost after Eleanor died, and it felt like I had died with her. It took you coming into my life to show me that I was alive. You brought me back to life, Jane, and I do love you for it. I want you to stay, I want you to marry me and be a mother to Sabine, and help me be a father to her.”

Jane took her hand out of his and knitted her fingers together nervously. “So this is what getting proposed to feels like?” she wondered aloud softly.

Daniel’s face sunk and he rose from his knee. “Is that a bad thing?” he asked sadly.

Jane shook her head and stood as well. “It is going to take me a long time to become myself again. I don’t know what prompts my memories but the six years I’m missing aren’t there yet. What happens if I never regain my memories and I am no longer the girl you want?” She had genuine fears that it could happen. She didn’t know who Daniel had fallen in love with; she was still trying to work out who she was. What if he changed his mind if she became someone else?

“Jane, that is impossible,” he assured her, taking her hand back confidently. “There is nothing that could ever happen that would ever make me give you up. I’m finished being scared and afraid to go for what I want. I’m taking a leap of faith and I want you to jump with me. We’re both entering into the unknown,” he said sincerely.

Jane could have melted as he spoke those words. And she knew exactly what so say in return. “I don’t want to die, whether it is in a year or fifty years, and have someone ask ‘did she have passion?’. Right now, that answer would be ‘no’. You are my passion; you and Sabine are my passion. If I die in a year or fifty years with you and Sabine by my side, that answer will be ‘yes’. My answer is ‘yes’.”

A magnificent smile spread across Daniel’s face as he enveloped Jane into his arms. “You are my passion,” he whispered in her ear.

Jane buried her face in his neck and inhaled in familiar scent. This was the rest of her life, and she could not feel safer, or happier. She could not wait.

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I hope you liked that chapter, I've been racking my brains to figure out how to write their finale and I thought that did it quite nicely. If they ask when I die "Did she have passion?" I hope my family will say 'yes' because writing is my passion. As cliche as it sounds, my friends, I hope you all find your passions :)

Dedicated to hrtbrkr87 for giving me one of the nicest compliments - thank you!

Next chapter will be the epilogue :)