i won't let him do that to me

Dear Annie,

I find myself grappling with an unfamiliar ache, a sense of longing that tugs at my heart in ways I can't quite explain, even though I barely know him. Maybe it's because he made conversation seem effortless, his kindness like a rare beacon of warmth in my otherwise quiet, shadowed world. His presence felt different, like a spark in a life that had become routine.

But as I reflect on my actions, I can't help but feel a pang of regret for how abruptly I left. Was I too harsh? Should I have been more forgiving? The questions swirl in my mind, teasing at the edges of my conscience. What if I misunderstood? What if I overreacted? They cling to me like the weight of an unresolved storm.

Yet, each time I begin to doubt myself, I remember. I remember the countless times I've been burned before—the scars left by those who took advantage of my kindness, who mistook my softness for weakness. I refuse to let myself be naive again. I won't fall prey to that same cycle of hurt and disappointment.

It's not that I want to close myself off from the possibility of something real, but I won't allow myself to be swept up again without caution. His charm may have disarmed me for a moment, but I won't let it undo everything I've learned. I won't let him repeat the mistakes of others.

I won't allow myself to be drawn back into a pattern of endless forgiveness, only to be let down time and time again. Maybe this time, walking away was the right choice, even if my heart aches at the thought of it.

- Annie

"Are you okay?" Amari's concerned voice cut through the chatter of the cafeteria as she leaned closer to Annie, her eyes scanning her friend's face for any signs of distress.

Annie shifted uncomfortably in her seat, her mind swirling with conflicting emotions. Should she confide in her friends about the sudden end to her budding friendship with Leo? Or should she keep it to herself, burying the disappointment deep within her?

With a half-hearted shrug, Annie feigned nonchalance, her gaze fixed on the table in front of her. She couldn't bear the thought of burdening her friends with her troubles, especially when she wasn't entirely sure how to articulate them herself.

"I'm okay," she murmured softly, the words feeling hollow even as they left her lips. "Just tired, you know?"

Amari's brows furrowed with concern, sensing Annie's reluctance to open up. "Are you sure?" she pressed gently, reaching out to place a comforting hand on Annie's arm.

Annie nodded in response, her heart heavy with the weight of her unspoken worries. She hated the taste of deception on her tongue, but the fear of judgment and misunderstanding kept her silent.

✉

The sound of Jack's booming voice shattered the peaceful silence of Annie's room, jolting her from her focused study session. With a resigned sigh, she set aside her books and made her way to the top of the staircase, where her brother's enthusiastic grin greeted her.

"What is it, Jack?" Annie's voice carried a note of exasperation as she peered down to where he stood, anticipation evident in his expression.

"You got a visitor," Jack announced with a mischievous wink before disappearing from view, leaving Annie to wonder who could possibly be calling on her unannounced.

As she descended the stairs, her thoughts raced, trying to piece together the puzzle of this unexpected visitor. Jay and Amari were the only ones she could imagine dropping by without warning, but Jack's cryptic demeanour suggested otherwise.

When she reached the bottom of the staircase, Annie froze in her tracks, her breath catching in her throat as she beheld the familiar figure standing in her foyer.

"Leo?" The name escaped her lips in a soft whisper, her heart pounding in her chest as she struggled to process his presence in her home.

Leo offered her a sheepish smile, his gaze filled with a mix of apprehension and sincerity. "Hi... I'm uh sorry if it's weird coming here. I just wanted to talk."

Annie blinked in disbelief, her mind whirling with a myriad of emotions. She motioned for him to follow her upstairs, her steps slow and deliberate as she led the way to her room, the weight of their unspoken history hanging heavy in the air.

Once they were alone in the sanctuary of her room, Annie turned to face Leo, her arms folded protectively across her chest. "What are you doing here?" Her voice was barely above a whisper, laced with a vulnerability she couldn't quite conceal.

Annie's heart raced as she stood before him, her nerves tangling into a web of confusion and apprehension. She had never felt this level of vulnerability, her usually steady composure crumbling in the presence of Leo's sincere apology.

Leo's sigh echoed in the quiet of her room, his words weighted with remorse and earnestness. "Look, I know you don't believe me but I really am sorry. I didn't mean to disappear on you like that, I just... got weird or something. But Annie, believe me when I say that I am in no way using you or just talking to you when I'm bored."

The tremor in his voice stirred something within her, a mix of doubt and longing swirling in her chest. She searched his eyes for any hint of deception, but found only sincerity staring back at her.

"Then why are you?" Her voice wavered slightly, betraying the turmoil raging within her. She needed answers, even if they were painful to hear.

Leo's shoulders slumped as he took a seat on the edge of her bed, his gaze dropping to the floor in a gesture of defeat. He ran a hand through his hair, the tension in his posture speaking volumes of his inner struggle. "Because I... I like being around you, Annie. You just make me smile even if you don't say anything. And your smile? It lights up the whole room even though I don't think you ever let yourself fully smile. You're sweet and smart and adorable and... I just didn't realize I'd miss you so much when you're not around you."

Annie's breath caught in her throat, the weight of his words settling over her like a warm blanket on a cold night. She felt a surge of emotion swell within her, her mind reeling with the realization that someone saw her, truly saw her, in a way she had never dared to imagine.

For a moment, she was lost in the depth of his confession, the sincerity in his eyes melting away her doubts and fears. But as the silence stretched between them, she knew she needed time to process it all, to untangle the threads of her own emotions before she could respond.

Annie didn't say anything, her silence a testament to the whirlwind of thoughts and feelings swirling within her.

Annie surprised both Leo and herself immensely when, with a hesitant but determined stride, she approached him. Without a word, she reached out, her trembling hands finding his, coaxing him to stand.

With a gentle touch, she pulled him into an embrace, her arms wrapping around him with a tenderness that spoke volumes. In that moment, words felt inadequate, unable to capture the depth of emotions swirling within her.

Leo's heart swelled as he felt her arms around him, a rush of warmth flooding his senses. He returned the embrace with a tenderness born of understanding, a silent promise to be there for her in whatever capacity she needed.

In that embrace, time seemed to stand still, the world fading away to nothing but the comforting presence of each other. Leo held her close, silently vowing to never let go, to be the anchor she needed in the tumultuous sea of emotions.