16 | i really do

billie's pov -

it's some weeks later and we're headed to new york for the next show on tour.

lani and i have honestly been kinda rocky. she saw the paparazzi photos of hasson and i and that really sent her on a rampage.

and honestly, i didn't argue back. she had every right to be upset with me. i get it.

but we've been talking since then, it's just not in depth how we usually are.

it's like she's not mad at me anymore but i can see that she's still holding on to it so it's kinda affecting our communication to one another. but hopefully seeing each other in person will help us get that connection back. at least that's what my mom keeps telling me.

but tbh lani hasn't even said anything about coming to watch my show while im here. which i don't get cause she's always excited to come watch me.

plus i've been saying how excited i am to watch her walk the runway. but every time i do, she just looks at me weird.

i don't know.

"this is such a cute hotel," zoe smiled as she looked around.

"yeah," i set my stuff down. "it really is."

"why do you look so down?" she squinted.

"i don't know," i shook my head.

"you just wanna go to lani's apartment and stay with her," she chuckled.

"i doooo," i admitted. "but we need to talk first."

"very true," zoe agreed. "maybe you guys can after your show tonight."

"well im hoping she comes to the hotel to see me before the damn show," i said. "cause we're all gonna be tired after."

then my phone rang.

"hey marg," i answered. "what's up?"

"hey i was just calling to see if you planned on seeing lani today or tomorrow," she said.

"wait what do you mean?" i furrowed my eyebrows. "why wouldn't i see her today?"

"oh it's fine if you do," she said. "i just know it's a really busy day for you both so i didn't know if y'all's schedules would align."

"busy day for us both?" i asked.

"um," she paused. "you both have shows today."

"wait what?" i kinda rose my voice. "i thought her show was tomorrow."

"no b," marg said. "her show is tonight, just like yours."

"oh my god that's why she never talked about coming to my show??"

"yes slow bird," she started. "she's not able to because she'll be getting ready for hers."

oh im a dumbass.

that's why every time i said id come watch her, she looked at me like i was just joking or something.

"well fuck," i rolled my eyes. "i need to see her like now then."

"you can do that?" margie asked.

"no," zoe chimed in. "you have sound check in one hour and then you have to go over everything else to make sure the people have all the lights and stuff right for tonight."

i groaned.

"just wait til tomorrow billie," margie said. "it'll be fine. i don't think she's expecting you til then anyway."

"no no no!" i said. "im gonna see my baby today, i don't care."

-

"billie what?" my mom looked at me like i was insane.

"just hear me out!" i begged. "we start the show 2 hours early and that way i make it to lani's show."

"so instead of 7-"

"we start at 5," i finished for her. "and i make it to the vs show."

"but i thought her show didn't start til 9?" mom asked.

"it doesn't but i need to be there before hand so ill have time to talk to her before they make her get dressed and everything."

"billie eilish," my mom sighed.

i just looked at her, not knowing what was next.

"you better be lucky you are who you are," she shook her head.

"ahh yes!!" i squealed as i jumped up and down. "yay!!"

mom chuckled. "leilani is one lucky girl."

"i sure do think so," i agreed in a nod.

-

the show at madison square garden was everything! the fans were okay with me starting early, and some were very happy about it since they had been outside camping all day.

"thank you guys for standing with me on this one!" i told them through the microphone. "i did this so i could go see my baby tonight!"

the crowd started cheering and goodbye began playing in the background as i took my bows, gave my giant air hugs, waved, and ran off stage.

-

"cmon cmon hurry hurry," i told my driver as we were on the way to the venue where the victoria secret show is.

we pulled up to the back and i saw margie standing outside waiting on me. i quickly got out the truck and ran to margie.

"cmon," she told me as she grabbed my hand and led me through back stage.

we came to the stage but remained to the side, behind the curtains.

"she's out there with everyone else," margie said. "doors open in 30 minutes. you don't need to be seen up here when they do."

"got it," i whispered. "thanks."

margie walked off and then i walked on the other side of the curtains, being able to see everyone running around trying to get ready.

then i spotted lani and she was talking to some guy, but she looked annoyed. he started pulling at some parts of the clothing she had on and she swatted his hand.

he backed away and then lani's head turned and she noticed me. her face immediately lit up and a smile quickly grew.

"billie!" she exclaimed as she ran and landed in my arms.

we hugged tightly.

as we hugged, the guy turned and looked at me, giving me the meanest mug ever. i looked at him weirdly as it caught me off guard and he turned and walked the other way.

"oh my god i've missed you so much!" she squeezed me tight.

"i've missed you more baby," i said.

then she gasped. "wait your show," her eyes got wide.

"i had it early," i chuckled.

"huh?" her face kinda dropped. "but how-"

"what did i tell you a long time ago?" i tilted my head.

lani chuckled. "crazy what being a celebrity will do for you," she mocked me.

"yup," i chuckled.

"oh baby," she hugged me again. "you did that for me? why?"

"i had to come see you. we need to talk," i told her.

"yeah," she nodded. "we do."

"and plus i wanted to watch your fine ass walk the runway," i slid my hands to her ass and gripped it.

"b!" she playfully hit my arm. "not here, cmon let's go to the dressing room to talk. it should be empty."

we started walking to her dressing room when i turned and asked her. "hey um so that dude you were talking to, isn't that luca marino?"

"yeah," she said without looking at me. "why?"

"i just saw him pulling at your clothes and you looked uncomfo-"

"he was just trying to fix it and make sure it looked okay," she said quickly as she cut me off.

"oh," i nodded. "okay."

we continued to walk down the hall until we made it to there dressing room. when we walked in, there was a girl sitting at a vanity putting lip gloss on.

"oh frankie look," lani said.

the girl's head shot to us and her eyes got wide. "no fucking way," she got up and walked towards us.

"good luck," lani mumbled to me in a chuckle.

"wait what's that suppose-"

"hi im frances," she quickly grabbed my hand and shook it while talking fast as fuck. "and im only saying that because leilani already knows my real name but ill prefer if you call me frankie okay thanks."

i just stood there with my eyes wide as i was kinda caught off guard.

"um okay," i chuckled, still holding her hand. "hi," i cleared my throat. then i decided to match her energy. "well my name is billie eilish pirate baird rose o'connell and im only saying that so you know i took lani's last name but ill prefer if you call me billie."

frankie grew a smile. "i like you. we're gonna be great friends."

"i think so," i grinned.

"well i must get going," she said as she walked past us.

"wait," lani said as she went up to her. she started whispering something to her and i couldn't understand what it was.

frankie just chuckled and rolled her eyes. "i got you," she said before walking off.

lani closed the door. "okay i have some to before the show starts so-" she said as she led me to her vanity area.

"im so sorry baby," i told her. "i should've told you everything from the jump."

"me too," she nodded. "i should've told you about jacob."

"and i should've told you about hasson," i said.

"im sorry," we both said.

"i should've let you fully explain," i told her. "i was so upset i didn't wanna hear anything, nor believe it."

"it's okay," she held my hand.

"no it's not," i shook my head.

"but it is now," she said. "cause we're passed it."

i sighed. "yeah."

"i don't like when we're not on the same page," she poked her lip out.

"me neither baby," i nodded. "we'll do better okay?"

"billie?" she said.

"yeah lani?" i looked in her eyes.

"you can hang with hasson," she looked down. "i don't mind."

"no no no," i shook my head. "that makes you feel some type of way so-"

"honestly billie i was more upset because of the way i found out," she started. "and because i could tell she liked you."

"oh," i said.

"but she called me like 2 weeks ago and told me how hurt you were about hurting me," lani continued. "and she apologized for everything that she caused. and she said that she didn't have feelings for you, it was more of a slight crush."

i rose my eyebrows in shock to this news.

"all that to say that i don't mind," she sighed. "as long as im in the loop," she nodded.

i tilted my head. "oh baby," i hugged her. "you're so sweet. but please know i didn't care to be friends with her that bad so it was whatever to me."

we both chuckled and then stood there.

this is what lani had on (minus the wings, just the corset and lingerie/ panties right now)

"i never mentioned how amazing you look," i elevator eyed her.

"really?" she blushed. then she started to slowly spin around so i could see.

"wait woah woah," i stopped her. "what is that?"

she slightly gasped. "oh uh-"

i looked on the side of her butt cheek and in red ink, it read billie eilish.

i rose my eyebrows and looked up at her. "leilani rose o'connell, did you get my name tattooed on your ass?"

she smiled. "maybe."

"like what- when did you-"

"a couple of weeks ago," she started. "i was drunk and mad at you and i was feening for you and-"

"and so you got my name tatted on you?" i rose my eyebrows, getting so turned on.

she bit her lip and nodded.

"that's your first tattoo, huh?"

"yep," she smirked as she nodded.

i bit my lip. "oh you really want it, don't you?"

"i really do," she rasped as she wrapped her arms around my neck and i wrapped my around her waist.

to be continued..